My dad is on a mission to buy a car. And his friend Hariz and I are watching him go through the motions of that. And we’re worried about him. Because he’s:doing it in that manic, obsessive, back-and-forth, tragic kind of way. Really he . doesn’t need a new car.
So I’m talking to Hariz about him. I know that Hariz also sees: what I see. I say something like “So have you tried talking him out of it?” He says “Yeah...” I think he dragged Hariz into it as well. I think they went somewhere to do a test-drive or something like that. So we talk a little bit about what we.think could be done to help him.
From the window I’m watching my dad arrive in the parking lot downstairs. The dusty parking lot across the street. I head down to meet him, because we made kind of an agreement that we’re gonna meet and go somewhere. As I’m heading down I’m kind of thinking about how our interaction might go and I’m planning to insist on: walking to where we planned to go. Because it’ll do him good and we might be able to talk about something meaningful which might help him.
When I get down there I see that he’s parked his car and I bring my car around and I park it two spaces over from his. His car is actually actually a car that he’s currently test-driving/debating over. I get out and I look at my car and I’m thinking how it compares to his, wondering whether or not he’ll compare them too. I think mine is better than that one. I realize that mine’s longer. ,
So I meet up with him and we’re walking back up to the apartment. He’s still talking about how it’s important that he gets a new car and the reasons why. One of the reasons that he lists is that the trunk in my car is no good. I’m like “What? The trunk is fine.” He says “It’s not very big and you can’t put anything in there without it moving around.”: I’m like “What? You just use the blanket to stop it from moving around or you put it into the basket. There are like a million ways to stop it from moving around.” He’s like “Nah, nah...” Then my mum says to him “Just think back to when we were young and we were in Bosnia, what you would have done if you could live a day in Germany!” She’s trying to get him to be appreciative of his situation to hopefully snap him out of it. She’s talking about gratitude, trying to shift his focus. There’s also a sense that my sister is being taken care of somewhere else, by someone, and there’s a sense that my dad has even forgotten about her.
Scene changes. My dad and I have arrived at this building. It’s kind of like we’re going to be doing some mission, like and action-shooter mission, bordering on horror. Like ina video game. So we’re preparing our ammunition. I don’t have that much ammo left but I’m like “I don’t have much but this will do.” Then he’s like “No, we can fix that!” he opens up this shelf in the wall and it’s an ammo dispenser vending machine. He uses his credit card and I’m getting boxes of ammo. I’m getting stocked up. I get one but the other side of the machine doesn’t work so I just end up getting one extra box of ammo.
Scene changes. We’re being chased in a medieval war situation. My dad or maybe someone else are on the run. A whole bunch of arrows are being shot at me and I’m trying to dodge them. So I’m doing this thing where I watch the arrows the arrows that are being shot at me very closely and I dodge each one. They fly very quick so I have to move very fast and focused. So it’s like I see 4 of them flying at me and I’m judging which ones are gonna miss me and which ones are heading for me. Then I focus on the ones that are heading for me and I side-step and knock it with my hand. But to that I have to time it perfectly so that I hit the side of it just before it’s about to hit me. I keep doing that while running backwards. I’m starting to get the hang of it more and more. I figure out that because it’s happening so quickly, as soon as I block some of them, my mind needs to let go of that and be ready to block the next ones. It’s a continuous letting go. I’m not allowed to dwell on anything. My focus needs to stay on the next thing I need to do. Once or twice I even deflect them with my body. It’s a really nice, beautiful kind of motion that I’m doing.