tv The Stream Al Jazeera December 28, 2013 12:30pm-1:01pm EST
putting out the question of characteristics, and masculinity in our society. >> that's a harsh statement. and those of you at home, we want you to be part of this conversation. >> keep tweeting, and so what does man up really mean? this and others run through the male mind like a mantra. >> don't cry, you need to pick yourself up. >> be cool. >> as much as i like to tattletale. >> be a man. >> man up. >> man up. >> man up. >> the three most destructive words that every man receives when he's a boy, when he's told to be a man.
>> if a guy is trying to juggle modern pressures and changing gender roles, are these messages harmful? here is aaron tracer, from salon and redbook, and he's also a stay at home dad. justin, apologists writer, and israel, a journalist, rog rico is a writer, and he's a father. and tyler is a nationally syndicated columnist. what does it mean to be a man in today's society and how does it change from the path? >> i can only speak about what it is to be a man. at least unless you know something that i don't know, i haven't checked my email, but it's not my turn. >> how about for you to be a man in today's society, jimmy, how would you define it for myself? >>
i make no decisions and don't listen to what people tell me how to be a man, i just do what i think is right and take responsibility if i'm wrong. >> tyler, i'm going to go to you for this question. what do you think is society's definition of manhood today? >> well, i'm from texas, and as a self-proclaimed gay girly man, i had to find a new definition, but it was not a motive, and it was very strong, but at the same time had no emotion. like dads from the neck up. >> and you grew up in texas, and how did this concept of masculinity that you grew up with, how did it affect you growing up? >> i knew that no matter what, growing up, slightly feminine, or more than slightly feminine, no matter how masculine i was, i was never going to be the type
of masculine or the type of man that society accepted, so for me, i had to redefine it for myself to feel like a man, because every mail wants to feel like a man. >> well, jeff, if we're talking about redefining masculinity. male suicides are at the highest in a decade and the worst since 1986. what unique pressures are today's men facing, jeff? >> i think that men are still trying to figure out what their roll is in society. especially men who probably don't follow a college track. 20 years ago, you could graduate high school and raise a family and have a high standard of living, and in today's economy, now, you don't have college educated people in the household, you're going to be struggling to meet the needs of not only yourself, but to have a strong, stable family. and that puts pressure, and we're seeing it now. >> talking about the pressure,
and it seems that the test for men hasn't been material, they have been seep as the breadwinners, and the community is talking about that. >> there's an increasing number of men who are now stay at home dads, the number is up to half a million even in terms of relative numbers, and why people think that is. but we have valerie here: airplane, i know you're a stay at home parent. and was the financial part a part in your decision in and second fold to that question, have you felt under pressure in society for being a stay at home dad? have you ever felt like someone was questioning your masculinity
for that? >> in the 70s, jobs from the united states, in the 70s and 80s, you had a drug epidemic with crack that destroyed the inner-city when jobs left. and i think that cities are glad to see men living up to responsibilities in front of them, and they don't care what it is. if it's historically what was thought of as a woman's job, and they're just happy to see that the guys who came before us. >> rog rodrigo. i want to get you in the conversation, and your wife has a masters, and you have a bachelors, and does that affect your concept of masculinity? >> my concept, to me, i don't
think it does. it accentuates the fact that accepting, i don't have an issue, and as a matter of fact, i wouldn't mind being a stay at home dad, and it would give me i think that my wife made the decision that she wanted to do it. to get a master's degree. with the understanding that at some point, that option was open to me. >> rodrigo, how about your community and friends? did they ever once question your decision? if you say, i hung out with a bump of guys at a bar, do you think that most people would give you props for that, or behind your back, say that he's shirking his responsibility as
a "man?" >> i said it before, it's about your responsibility, whatever is in front of you. you go ahead and take care of that. and you really should have no one question you, how you get that done. i have family members from pursue know that i don't make as much as my wife does, and question us to a degree, but that's the older generation, and i think that the newer generation has a much better understanding of what the income is for the family to stay afloat. >> we put out a question of what misconceptions there are out there about men, and we got a lot of interesting responses. here glen says:
i want to bring you into the conversation, and what pressures do you think the media portrays what real men are? that they have to be more stoic and suppress their meetings? >> sure, as a working man, i feel that the issue resonates with me. i watch a lot of television shows where asian men are emasculated. the guy who can't get the non-asian girl. and it's something growing up, that i have always had to deal with. and i feel like for asian american men, we constantly have to fight against these stereotypes. and many of us feel that even with people like bruce lee or jackie chan, we still need to fight these stereotypes to improve ourselves, and i think
that's an issue that definitely needs to be addressed among all asian american men. >> tyler, i want to get your opinion on this. we have seen a rise in feminism and a rise in the workplace. how does that affect how men are viewing themselves and their masculinity? >> i hope so. for me, i never would fit into the group, in my own convictions, that goes beyond the gay thing, that goes to any man. >> right, so coming up, binge drinking, are boys, the next generation of men coping?
consider this: the news of the day plus so much more. >> we begin with the government shutdown. >> answers to the questions no one else will ask. >> it seems like they can't agree to anything in washington no matter what. >> antonio mora, award winning and hard hitting. >> we've heard you talk about the history of suicide in your family. >> there's no status quo, just the bottom line. >> but, what about buying shares in a professional athlete? >> al jazeera america is the only news channel that brings you live news at the top of every hour. >> here are the headlines at this hour. >> only on al jazeera america. many worry that the gains made in education will not stick in the future. aljazeera's jane ferguson takes us to a school in kandahar city
that was long considered a success and is now facing closure. >> it's a place offering more than these girls know, a quality education in real tangible skills, a path away from positivity and early marriage and towards university and a career. since 2002, the modern stud has been teaching women languages, like management and computer skills. that they are skills that speak of ambition which in the heart of tallle ban country is remarkable. >> we are a unique school, preparing women to go to jobs. our school is preparing women to go to universities. i'm phil torres. coming up this week on techknow. it's roll-call for the santa cruz police.
their locked, loaded, armed with a computer program that could change everything. >> we found that the model was just incredibly accurate at predicting the times and locations where these crimes were likely to occur. >> alright, where are we going? >> put your hands behind your back. >> can science predict crime before it happens?
>> a man's responsibility is to country. >> welcome back. we're talking about what it means to be a man today. that was one of our young streamers weighing in, and we asked the community what masculinity will look like in the future and what do they say. >> they have thoughts about how to drive it in a more positive direction in the future...
aaron, do you have a take on what teaching healthy masculinity would actually look like? >> i think it would just be supportive of your kids, and sort of give them very specific boundaries, but i think it's gender neutral. the one distance i saw, being a park hom for five years, was that the dads who were at the park were a lot more per permissive with the rough housing and getting their energy out. it was not a male thing, we would let our daughters get in there too. but there was a comfort with more physical activity than most mothers had, and i think that was a positive thing about dads taking a lead-in parenting. you know? it was a little more comfortable and rough. but at the same time, giving very specific boundaries, and
i'm not sure it's gender things. i think its treating your kids with equal amounts of reflect and sternness and support. gender. >> all right, guys, we started the show off with the term, man up. and we talked about responsibility with the younger generation and what it means to be a healthy modern man. for the new generation, how would you define man up for the younger generation? i'm going to go first with jimmy. >> of course you are. >> of course. >> well, i teach my sons behavior that as a young black man, he cannot afford to be ambiguous about who he is and what he represents. so that's what i'm teaching my children. i'm teaching my young lady similarly, to own her behavior. >> tyler, you're up next.
>> for me, i think it doesn't have to do with mask masculinity, but it has something to do with don't back down to the pressure of those around you. if you believe in something, stand up for it, especially in a situation of a group where there's a group mentality and a group think of the if you believe in something, to be a man is to stand up for it. whether you're going to be popular or call a man later or not. >> justin, you're up. >> manny, first of all, i think we should eliminate that phrase. i think that nowadays, a lot of feminists would have issue with it. but to me, man up would mean approaching things with a calm state of mind, and not letting your emotions take you over, or letting you make bad decisions. i also think that it means to be
just to treat everyone equally. you know? regardless of race, sexual preferences, and things like that. >> jeff, you have about 20 seconds. >> i don't have a problem with the term, man up. i think it's okay to take young males, look, you can be phenomenally respectful, hard working, potential leader in our society. so that's what i'm going to tell young men. man up, be the best that you can be at everything that you do in life. >> i want to thank our guests, jimmy, jeff, rodrigo, and tyler, and our community. see you online.
>> you're watching the news hour live from our headquarters in doha. we have the top stories. what happens to the human body when it doesn't get enough food? the effect of series war on refugees at the camp in damascus. an egyptian student is dead and more than a hundred arrested as protest moves beyond the capitol