tv The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Comedy Central August 6, 2015 7:52pm-8:25pm PDT
for days or meant to after your friend sent you the link. you twit bloged it on the interscape, people on fv have talked about how much people have talked about it. >> the grudge match between daily show host jon stewart and cnbc host jim cramer. >> people staying in hotels are wondering why it is on the cover of their free paper. tonight the week-long feud of the century comes to a head. cramer stewart in a 12 minute face-off that could marginally increase the very rate comedy central charges for 30 seconds of advertising time. welcome to brawlstreet. get ready to buy low and sell guy. (cheers and applause)
>> jon: welcome to the daily show! i just dislocated both my shoulders. (laughter) >> jon: i'm jon stewart, baby. it's go time! (cheers and applause) in just a few moments of host of cnbc's "mad money" with jim cramer, jim cramer -- he's sitting right there -- and i jon stewart of the daily show with jon stewart, i will be sitting where i'm sitting right now. (laughter) >> jon: probably not going to be moving. we'll be discussing the intricacies of the world financial markets. as you can imaginative's been training all day. >> what does pe stand for. >> how many stocks in the dow. >> 30. >> biggest software kpon ept. >> microsoft. >> biggest hardware component. >> u.s. steel. >> wrong maggot. >> what is tier 1 capital. >> a core measure of expo
tension -- equity -- equity capital and cash reserve -- >> but. >> but also possibly including the receivable amount of preferred stock and retained earnings. let's do this thing! yeah! (cheers and applause) >> jon: i'm ready, baby. i've learned it all. i've been studied. did you know that the guy on the 20 was a president but the guy on the 100 is just some [bleep] guy? (laughter) >> jon: i didn't know that. so what was my opponent doing today to prepare? >> please welcome jim cramer. (applause) >> jon: yes, to prepare for the skirmish he appeared in public with a convicted white collar criminal. (laughter) >> jon: not sure how that's going to help him. >> so you are mad at somebody like -- make believe this is jon stewart. now it is cold, you did that very well.
(laughter) >> jon: mr. cramer, don't you destroy enough dough on your own show? (cheers and applause) >> jon: boom goes the dynamite. how weird is our world? when jim cramer is on tv baking pie and martha stewart is the one who went to jail for securities fraud? (laughter) >> jon: that's weird. actually, jim cramer and cnbc are not the financial villains today. this morning the tire some word "alleged" was officially removed from bernie madoff, aka arthur ponzerelli who pled guilty to 11 counts of fraud for his $64 billion scam. >> we have also been telling you there is a maximum sentence here of 150 years in jail. as you well know, he is an older man. he is 70 years old. so obviously this would pretty much translate into a life sentence. >> jon: yeah, i'm pretty
sure 150 years is a life sentence for anyone. (laughter) >> jon: except perhaps madoff's accomplice tortoise pete. 150 years for him, he would get out in time for his midlife crisis but will his turtle wife wait for him? hello, doris. madoff's 4,000 victims include nobel laureate and holocaust survivor eli weiszel and actor kevin bacon, so if madoff has accomplished nothing else, he is now connected kevin bacon to hitler in only two degrees. (laughter) >> jon: of course i enjoy a challenge. you could still do it the hard way. hitler was in triumph of the will which was directed by leny reachenschtall who was in -- who was in death dell doctor danwits with maximillian schells who who was in telling lies in america with kevin bacon. (cheers and applause)
>> jon: but of course this is not why you came here tonight. so let's get to the main event. what we've all been waiting for or 150 or so people here. the host of cnbc's mad money please welcome to the program, jim cramer. sir! (cheers and applause) >> jon: how the hell did we end up here, mr. cramer? what happened? >> i don't know. i don't know. big fan of the show. who has never said that? >> jon: well, many people. (laughter) >> jon: let me just explain to you very quickly one thing that i think is somewhat misinterpreted. this was not directed at you per se. i just want to let you know that. we through some banana cream pies at cnbc. you got a little -- obviously schmuts on your jacket from it took exception. i think that everyone should come in under criticism because we all should have seen it more. admittedly this is a terrible one and everybody got wrong, i got a lot of
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cnbc advertises itself as and what it. and the help that people need to discern this. let me show you this is the promo for your show. >> okay. >> jon: all right so, this is jim cramer'so. >> in an economy of from fall investments on the brink. when you don't know what to do don't panic cramer's got your back. "mad money" with jim cramer. >> jon: isn't that you know look we're both snake oil salesmen to a certain extent. but we do label the show as snake oil here. isn't there a problem -- selling snake oil as vitamin tonic and saying it cures impetigo, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, isn't that the difficulty here? >> i think that -- there are two kinds of people. there are people who come out and they make good calls and bad calls and they're financial professionals. and then there are the people who say they only make good calls and they're liars. i try really hard to make as many good calls as i can. >> jon: i think the difference is not good call, bad call. the difference is real
market and unreal market. let me show you this is -- you ran a hedge fund. >> yes, i did for many years. >> a lot of times when i was short at my hedge fund and i was positioned short meaning i needed it down i would create a level of activity beforehand that could drive the futures. it doesn't take much money. >> jon: what does that mean? >> okay this was a hyperbolic example of what i was trying to get people -- you had a great piece about short-selling earlier. i have been trying to reign in short-selling, trying to expose what really happens. this is what december on what i am trying to say s and i didn't do this but i'm trying to explain to people, this is the shenanigans --. >> jon: it sounded like you were talking about that you had done it. >> then i was inarticulate because i did -- i barely traded the futures. but i will say this, i am trying to expose this stuff exactly what you guys do. and i'm trying to get the regulators to look at it. >> jon: see, that is interesting. roll 210. >> i would encourage anyone in hedge funding to do it
because it's legal and it is very quick way to make money. and very satisfying. >> by the way, no one else in the world would ever admit it but i didn't care. >> that's right, and you can say it here. >> i'm not going to say it on tv. (laughter) >> we're on tv now. >> jon: i want the jim cramer on cnbc to protect me from that jim cramer. >> i think the way you do that is to show -- (applause) >> okay, that's -- the regulators watch the tape they realize the shenanigans that goes on. they can go after that. they didn't catch padoff. >> jon: when you talk about the regulators why not the financial news network. that's the whole point of this. >> okay. >> jon: cnbc could be an incredibly powerful tool of illumination for people that believe that there are two markets, one that has been sold to us as long-term. put your money in 401 ks
put your money in pensions and just leave it there. don't worry about it it's all doing fine. then there is this other market, this real market that's occurring in the back room where giant piles of money are going in and out. and people are trading them. and it's transactional and it's fast. but it's dangerous. it's ethically dubious and it hurts that long-term market. so what it feels like to us and i'm speaking purely as a layman it feels like we are capitalizeing your adventure by our pension and our hard earned -- and that it is a game that you know, that you know is going on but that you go on television as a financial network and pretend isn't happening. (applause) >> okay, my first reaction is absolutely we could do better. absolutely, there are shenanigans and we should call them out. everyone should. i should do a better job at it. but my second thing is is i talk about the shorts every
single night. i've got people in congress who i have been working with to try to get the uptick, it is a technical thing but it would cut down a lot of the games that you are talking about. i'm trying. i'm trying. >> jon: but the gentleman in that video is a sober rational individual. and the gentleman on "mad money" is throwing plastic cows through his legs and shouting sell, sell sell and then coming on two days later and going i was wrong you should have bought. like i can't reconcile the brilliance of knowledge that you have and the intricacies of the market with the crazy [bleep] i see you do every night. (laughter) >> jon: that's english. that is treating people like adults. >> how about if i try it. >> jon: try what? >> try doing that. i will do that. look anything --. >> jon: that would be great but if not -- it's not just you. it's larger forces at work. it is this idea that the financial news industry is
not just guilty of a sin of omission but a sin of comission, that they are actually in bed with this idea -- >> no, we are not in bed with them. no, i don't think that is fair. honestly. i think that we try to report the news. and i think that some people --. >> jon: a couple of guy does this guy faber. >> he is fabulous, he is fabulous. and he has done some things that really have blown the cover off a lot of stuff. >> jon: but this thing was ten years in the making. >> right. >> jon: and it's to the going to be fixed tomorrow. but the idea that you could have on the guys from bear stearns and merrill lynch and guys that had leveraged 35 to 1 and then blame mortgage holders, i means that's insanity. >> i never did that. you are -- i always wished that people would come on and swear themselves in before they come on the show. i had a lot of ceos lie to me on the show. it's very painful. i don't have subpoena power. >> jon: but you are pretending that you are a doe-eyed innocent. roll -- (laughter) >> jon: i mean if i may just -- >> you your show for
heaven's sake. >> jon: roll 21. >> not 212. >> you can that is a violation of -- you can't foment you can't create yourself an impression that a stock is down. but you do it anyway because the sec doesn't understand it. so you -- i means that's the only sense that i would say --. >> jon: 216. >> another stock a lot of people are focused on is apple. >> yeah, apple is very important to spread the rumor that both verizon and at&t decide they don't like the phone. an easy one to do because it is you want to spread the human their is to the going to ready for mac world, and this is easy because the people who write about apple want that story. and you can claim that it's credible because you spoke to one at sap el because apple doesn't --. >> jon: they are not -- >> they are not going to comment. >> you know --. >> jon: i got to tell you you know, i understand you want to make finance entertaining. but it's not a [bleep] game.
and dii -- when i watch that i get -- i can't tell you how angry that makes me. because what it is as to me is you all know. you all know what is going on. you know, you can draw a straight line from those shenanigans to the stuff that was being pulled at bear and at aig and all this derivative market stuff that is this weird wall street side bet. >> but don't you want guys like me that have been in it to show the shenanigans. what else can i do. >> jon: no, no no. i want desperately for that. but i feel like that's not what we are getting. what we are getting is listen, you knew what the banks were doing. and yet we're touting it for months and months. the entire network was. and so now to pretend that this was some sort of crazy once in a lifetime tsunami that nobody could have seen coming is disingenuous at best. and criminal at worst. >> but dick who ran lehman
brothers called me in when the stock was at 40 because i was saying i thought the stock was wrong. i thought it was the wrong place to be. brings me in lies to me lies to me, lies to me. i have known him for 20 years. >> jon: the ceo of a company lied to you. >> shocker stop trading. yeah, i know. >> jon: but isn't that financial reporting. i mean i guess -- what do you feel like is the role of cnbc? >> i have called for -- i want kangaroo courts for these guys. i really do. i want indictments. we've not seen any indictments. where are -- where is the indictments for aig. i have told the justice department here's the way you get the indictments. >> jon: it's very easy to get on this after the fact. the measure of the network and the measure of the man, cnbc could act as, you know, in some ways, look, nobody is asking for them to be a regulatory agency. but can't --s whoas side are they are. it feels like they have to reconcile, is their audience the wall street traders that are doing this for constant profit on a day-to-day, the
short term, these guys at these companies were on a sherman's march through their companies financed by our 401 ks. and all the incentives of their companies were for short-term profit. and they burned the [bleep] house down with our money and walked away rich as hell. and you guys knew that that was going on. (applause) >> okay, i have a wall of shame. why do i have ban an -- banana creme pies. because i throw them -- do you know how many times i panted ceos. >> jon: but this isn't as carly simon would say this song ain't about you. >> all right, you are right, i don't want to personalize it, but i think we have reporters who try really hard. we're not always tolted the truth. but most importantly the market was going up for a long time. and our real sin, i think was to believe that it could continue to go up a lot in the face of what you describe, which is a lot of borrowing, a lot of shenanigans. and i know i did. i will bring it up. look, i didn't think that bear stearns was going to evaporate overnight. i didn't. i knew the people who ran it. i had always thought they were honest.
that was my mistake. i really did. i thought they were honest. did i get taken in because i knew them from before? maybe to some degree. the guy who came on from wachovia was an old friend of mine who helped hire me. >> jon: honest or not, honest in world, in what world is a 35 to 1 leveraged position sane. >> the world that made you 30% year after year after year begining from 1999 to 2007. and it became very difficult to --. >> jon: but isn't that part of the problem selling this idea that you don't have to do anything. any time you sell people the idea that sit back and will you get 10 to 20% on your money. don't you always know that that is going to be a lie? when are we going to realize in this country, that our wealth is work. that we're workers. and by selling this idea of hey, man, i will teach you how to be rich, how is that different than an infomercial? >> well, i don't think -- i think that your goal should always be to try to expose the fact that you -- there is no easy money. i wish i had found madoff.
>> jon: but the slow is called fast money. >> i think that people, there is a market for it. and you give it to them. and i think --. >> jon: there is a market for cocaine and hookers. (laughter) >> interesting edit point. >> jon: we'll be right bac so you're a small business expert from at&t? yeah, give me a problem and i've got the solution. well, we have 30 years of customer records. our cloud can keep them safe and accessible anywhere. my drivers don't have time to fill out forms. tablets. keep it all digital. we're looking to double our deliveries. our fleet apps will find the fastest route. oh, and your boysenberry apple scones smell about done. ahh, you're good. i like to bake. add new business services with at&t and get up to $500 in total savings.
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>> jon: welcome back. and now, the thrilling conclusion of the jim cramer interview. >> jon: what is the responsibility of the people who cover wall street? who are you responsible to? the people in the 401 ks and the pensions and the general public, or the wall street traders, and by the way, this casts aspersion on all of wall street when that is unfair as well. the majority of those guys are working their asses off really grit guys, i know a lot of them. they are trying to do the right thing and they are getting [bleep]ed in this too (applause) >> true, true, i think as a network we produce a lot of interviews where i think that there have been people who have not told the truth.
should we have been constantly pointing out the mistakes that were made absolutely. i truly wish we had done more. i think that we've been very tough on the previous treasury secretary, very tough on the previous administration, how they didn't get it. very tough on ben bernanke. but at the same time i --. >> jon: but he's the guy paulson is the guy who wrote the rule that allowed people to overleverage. >> i trash him every night i called him a liar on tv. what am i going to do. should we all call him liars. i am a commentator. you could issue with the fact that i throw bulls and bears and i could still be taken serious. i'm not edward r. murrow i'm trying to do an entertainment show for people to watch it is difficult to have a reporter saying i came from an interview with hank paulson and he lied his head off. it is difficult. i think it challenges the boundaries. >> jon: yeah i'm under the assumption and maybe this is purely ridiculous but i'm under the a sump slun that you don't just take their word at face value. that you actually then go around and try and figure it out. so -- again i -- you now
have become the face of this. and that is incredibly unfortunate. >> i wish hi done a better job trying to figure out the 30 to 1 and whether it was going to blow up. it did. once it did, i was late in saying that it was bad. it didn't work. >> jon: so maybe we could remove the financial expert and the in cramer we trust and start getting back to fundamentals on the reporting as well, and i can go back to making fart noises and funny faces. >> i think we make that deal right here. (cheers and applause) >> jon: mad money on cnbc weeknights at 6:00. jim cramer.
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they cost a ridiculous number of miles. enough is enough... switch to the capital one venture card. with venture, you'll earn unlimited double miles. and using those miles is easy. just book any flight you want, on any airline. then use your miles to cover the cost. no blackout dates. what's in your wallet? kitten in the tree. fix the pipes. walker texas ranger. sorry kev. did it stay tucked? yup. yeah. the new stay tucked crew. we tested it so you know it works. >> jon: that's our show. oh join us next week at 11:00. i hope that was as uncomfortable to watch as it was to do. here it is your moment of zen. >> i love jon stewart. i think he's great. he is -- almost like -- i think he does what twittering does, in a way.
(applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org jon: i'm glad you tuned in to today's show. [ laughter ] it's an important one. [ laughter ] one that you and your family can't afford to miss. well, could you miss it, but if you miss it, you'll die. [ laughter ] you know, for many years i felt that government when commentently -- comp tenty run -- competently run could help the less fortunate. [ laughter ] women voting --
[ laughter ] i thought it was progress but i didn't realize how sick it was making me. [ laughter ] making all of us. >> progressivism the cancer that is destroying our founding values. >> progressivism is the cancer in america and it's eating our constitution. >> jon: america, i have cancer. [ laughter ] we in this country have cancer value and document eating cancer. [ laughter ] but the cure is right around the corner. follow me, america. >> march 18, 2010, from comedy central's world news headquar