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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  November 11, 2022 8:00pm-9:00pm PST

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the entire interview. incredible. happy vet raabs day. thank you for everything you've done for america and continue to do by your example. that is it for us tonight. thank you for watching. remember, it's america, now and forever. and greg gutfeld and the gang take it all from here. >> greg: that is not true. happy friday, everybody. yes. let's welcome tonight's guests. his wit is as dry as a muslim happy hour, western owner and comedian, david
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angelo. her glasses say librarian by day and librarian by night. host of kennedy and fox business, kennedy. and, she eats like a bird, meaning mostly worms and insects. fox news contributor cath. and, for thanksgiving, he's eating turkey, the country. the world health champion, cyrus. great news, my goldfish is alive and well it's been a great week of shows. great stories, great jokes, but as usual, we have some extras, which means, it's time for -- >> greg's leftovers. >> time once again for leftovers, i read the jokes we
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didn't use this week. as always, it's the fist time reading these and i'm scared. i'm not going to lie to you. this is the most uncomfortable moment of my week -- well, second -- experts are now saying that permanent daylight savings time will actually hurt our overall health. president biden agreed and in solidarity, he says from now on, he'll fall forward. yeah, yeah, you people are sick. they're all sick. during a speech prior to the election, democrat john fetterman mistakenly said he would celebrate the demise of row v. wade, but he denied his error saying please don't put words in my mouth. it's where they go to die. a midterm exit poll revealed that about one in three americans want joe biden to run for president again.
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the other two say they've already paid back their student loans. that's true. stacey abrams and bay toe o rourke were among numerous democrats who once again lost an election. oh, good for you. but i think maybe we should withhold judgment until the final vote tallies are recorded next summer. saw that one coming. the new york city marathon took place this weekend, of the 50,000 runners who participated, more than half are still missing. that's funny because it's true. the first trailer of the whale was released this week, which stars brenteden frazier as a 600 pound man who tries to reconnect with his estranged daughter. he was so committed to the role, he even did his own chafing.
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>> preview screenings of the film are giving it rave reviews including lizzo, who gave it two forks up. >> cold blooded. >> greg: yes the founder of the ock laws vr -- stands for virtual reality, cath, it's a version of the product that can kill a person in real life if they die in the video game. the game's title, andrew cuomo's nursing home. take a sip. yeah. yeah. thank you. during the houston astros world series parade on monday,s senator ted cruz was hit by a can of beer. but after failing to catch it, he was immediately offered a contract with the mets. i don't even get that joke.
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>> you will if you're a mets fan. >> i know. but it's so -- it's so exclusionary, sports humor. don't you agree, david? >> no, david, i follow bad gammon and nothing else. >> greg: a man flying jet blue from new york to detroit was arrested monday after allegedly masturbating on the two-hour flight, the attorney defended his behavior saying some people enjoy a plotting after a smooth landing my client does this instead. 178 people named hero kazu tanaka broke the large test gathering of people with the same name. the weirdest part is everyone at the party was wearing a name tag. germans are fighting rising heating costs with a new class called dance yourself warm. instructors says it come pines traditional moves like waltzing
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and invading poland. finally, and finally, two words that i was really looking forward to -- united airlines is eliminating middle seats to if it the growing number of plus sized passengers. overweight fliers can replace seat belts with suspenders or filling their oxygen masks with gravy. and now, to some actual news. we need music here -- pum, bum, bum, bum, bum -- something like that -- next week. the midterms are several days old. but the mystery of who controls congress could last until next week. as frustration builds with several races still uncalled, it's clear that the current system, much like david angelo's antiperspirant isn't working. and as "the wall street journal" noted, these delays are a result of mass mail voting and they're no good for public confidence.
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thanks for that, "wall street journal." so tonight's panel isn't really qualified to solve any of this. but when did that stop bret bare. oh, look, i have mara liasson and susan paige, we're in dc, the nation's capital, we take amtrak and root for the nationals. you make me sick. thank you. yeah, that was uncalled more. you know, david, do you -- you run a razor company -- i mean, i imagine you can check your inventory faster than what we're seeing here with the midterm votes. what do you make of this situation? >> true, i appreciate the mention. the razor company, i have to say, it's no it a joke. it's a real company. i get emails saying, is that joke? i ship razors -- yeah, but anyway. i appreciate the comment on exclusionary humor with sports
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to your bret barry amtrak. but, yeah, these things, the vote -- is it okay that i say i don't care about democracy? like i don't care. >> greg: that's a luxury you have now because the founding fathers made it so people like you wouldn't have to care maybe you owe a debt of gratitude to those smelly little weirdos. >> i live in new york city. i know there's a communist elected one way or the other. doesn't matter what it is. it's like, democracy, you walk around, you see all of the people, the idea that they have say over my life, it's just -- what are we doing? i want full dictatorship. >> greg: i see what you mean i kind of see what you mean in the sense that 80% of the manhattanites voted for hochul and they have no right to complain about crime anymore. they get mugged -- [ applause ]
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i was going to say something awful but i decided not to, kennedy. >> good for you. the self-edit button is working. >> greg: i know what made you happy and what made you sad? >> i like to see ron desantis win by large margins because it makes so much of the country -- it makes -- i want makes so many people who annoy me upset. >> greg: right >> so, when people who want government to have more control over your life and want parents to be disconnected from classrooms, when they're crying, i'm smiling. so that alone was pretty great. the death of bay toe o'rourke's career was phenomenal. >> greg: was that premature? >> absolutely. >> greg: remember, losing to him is winning -- because he's -- >> apparently so. what a cottage industry that is. so even if he's got a little bit of a gift where he's taking 5%
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off of the top of whatever gets poured into his losing elections, it's got to be at this point, i'm not even kidding, like a half a billion dollars. so, if he's gotten $25 million off of that, why would you stop. i think that's quite a little cottage industry. >> jon jarvis: jesse jackson ran for president every four years since the 1700s. >> that's right. >> greg: you can google that you'll find nothing there. cath, you're used to waiting for results. does -- what is -- >> why would you say that when you could say anything else? i'm honestly just curious. >> i had to wait for a few results in my day. >> greg: what's your take home of this week? we talked about -- what's the third show since the
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election? any take home, any sum are aization summary of your thoughts? >> you didn't answer my question. florida was fast because it was a total blowout. but i called it on this show weeks ago. >> greg: really? what? >> the cath decision desk does not get enough credit. yeah that he was going to win. the thing that sucks about how long it takes for me is it takes all of the fun for election night for people like me who don't enjoy sports. that's the thing i enjoy watching. by the time they announce it, people forget it's happening. >> greg: it does deflate the excitement you're sitting there. you know what's great, you're sitting there watching fox. and they have the results that have not changed still up there. and they're like, let's go. and i'm looking at arizona and they still have the same number that was there two days ago and i'm going, why don't you just take that [ bleep ]. down because i keep looking at it. i keep looking at it going, has
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it changed? it hasn't. same thing with arizona. i don't know if -- if that's even changed. but it's very -- it's very saddening. saddening. i don't know if that's a word. >> you know, i don't know if you have a question. i would love to be the result guy right now. i could do it from home. let's go to tyrus live -- nothing yet, back to you. i could do that for like six months, you know what i'm saying? >> it's remarkable to see all of the people on the news on election night able to talk hours upon hours and be like, we don't know. it could be this. but if it's not, it could also be this. back to you. >> the bay toe thing real quick, i got to be honest, i'm envious. think about it. you run, you get all kinds of money. and then you don't have to go to work. like, if he won, he would be irate. he would come out like, what are you doing? did you not hear
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anything said? i skate boarded to the dentist, you voted for me? [ bleep ]. you, america, i'm not going i'm running in toledo in six weeks. >> i told people from texas i was going to take their guns. >> i don't know if it will work. not taking anything or this job. >> greg: yes we have to move on. great stuff ahead, up next, probably my favorite story of all time. a school board puts its trust in the teacher with the massive bust.
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we feel it's a must to keep covering this giant fake bust. true, a canadian teacher still causing ripples with giant plastic nipples. and while other journalists turn
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their back, we got an update on the giant rack. which means it's time for -- if it happens up there, we report down here you're watching gazumba-gate, canada, 2023. week eight. >> greg: yes >> jesus. >> greg: the extra chesty transgender canadian high schoolteacher now infamous for her huge fake cans more like kegs filled with moose head lauger there's news. here's what you missed. according to the toronto sun, she once a he began identifying as female last year and started to wear massive prosthetic breasts to class. was it a troll or was it a mistake converting the bra size to metric. the school hopes it deflates and we'll move on. as a child, i was bottle fed, so
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i'm extra intrigued. i'm not the only show to keep tabs on the toronto teacher with oversized prosthetic breasts. not sure what that says about us, be but just trying to keep you abreast. terrible. the crack investigative team in gutfeld has been all over this story like water in a wet t-shirt contest. we have an update, the school board where she teaches has come out in support of the teacher's literally in your face fetish. it's important to recognize the impact that dress code policies can have on members of the transgender community. right. because the transgender community all have to wear breasts the size of the moons of neptune. it's important for employers to make allowances to express themselves in accordance with their lived gender. sure thing, pal.
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how about a little common sense. women don't look like that in my dreams. so basically, if you say you trans, you can game the system. why not go to work in a g-string? that's how i express myself. you know that g stands for greg, right? it's true. and what about the rights of kids exposed to such a sexualized caricatures of a woman. a biological female dressed like that would get fired. though they would likely be brought back after a he decision signed by every male student. kennedy -- where are you on this now? do you -- do we still think it's a big troll? do you? i'm still onboard theish this is the hill i'm going to die on. >> no, this -- this is an attention-seeking person who loves the publicity that you are single handedly giving her. but, i've done a little thinking about this.
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so, at some point, greg, i have to retire. that means i have to -- my retirement. what i'm going to do, you're not going to see me next week, i'm moving to ontario canada where i'm going to teach in spandex with a giant horse dong as a man. and i'm going to teach kids and i'm going to do this in class because that's what makes me feel good and empowered as a man, as a guy. i'm new to the game. but i think i'm going to win it and then if they tell me that i cannot wear light pink spandex with my horse ween, i'm going to sue for probably as much money that has gone into bay toe o'rourke's failed campaigns. i'm going to sue, i have $1 million, i'm going to win, and buy a giant boat where i can wriggle my horse parts at all of my fans.
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>> greg: horse parts, you should name your boat horse parts no way you can drive safely wearing those books. we've never seen this person dressed like that anywhere else. so it's deliberately done for the school. must be put on in the parking lot we'd see pictures. this is deliberately for the school. would you agree with me? >> i want to take back what i said, i don't know how people talk without knowing anything about elections. we've had to do this with this for how many months now? i don't know what which else to say except for basically what that statement said is that no woman has to wear a bra to work to teach at the school anymore. no woman has to. (one person applauds). >> sorry, sorry. >> yeah, if i didn't wear my bra to work, everyone would be like,
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cath, when did you get top surgery? >> or they'd say, hello, young man. >> yeah, exactly. (light applause). >> no? no. >> greg: tyrus, like i said, i'm going to follow this story to the end >> listen, i -- just to get this over with -- i am willing to volunteer tyrus and temp, to fly out and follow him for a day. we fly out and -- >> greg: why don't we do this? >> we'll find out when he puts them over and when he puts them on. regardless, this is how this individual wants to live their life in the privacy of their own home, then great. but you chose a job where you're going to be an educator for children. so, there's a certain decor rum there. and, to kennedy's point about her horseness -- >> that's right. >> if she were to do that, or i
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decided to start coming to work in gym coach shorts from back in -- the elastic ones back in the day, nobody wants to see that. so, and if they do, i don't want to see them. but the point is that that's not your time to be you. you're a teacher. >> greg: exactly >> and no one should dress like that. no one should have to see pancake-sized silver dollar -- >> arreolas. >> sun dials, thank you. no one has wants to see that unless they go to an establishment and pay for it or someone's house. shame on the school board for being that weak. >> they are either playing that troll out, trying to outtroll them. i don't think they're that smart or they're petrified of going to prison because in canada, you can get charged for the weirdest stuff. i think that's true, david. maybe i dreamt it.
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but if you misgender or you say something or discrimination. you don't go to jail, but you can get fined. maybe people don't want to get in trouble. but this is a fed, obviously, they now made fetishism a lived -- kind of a lived gender, right? so you should be relieved. >> true. i was born male but i'm hoping one day to become a man. >> greg: you identified as a preteen you've been holding fast, constantly shaving. no wonder you run shaving company, you shave everywhere, don't you? >> you should see my legs. they're beautiful. but here's my problem with this -- this person. it's cheating. it's cheating. there's -- no, in real book terms, that's at least 60 pounds of book -- boobs. that's not 60 pounds. >> greg: it's inflated so you're not hunched over. >> you have to go the full
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weight if you're going to do it. you're not doing -- >> greg: you know, you're right if this person was sincere about this, they would want it to be as real as possible. and if it was as real as possible, how could that person walk around with size 80 or 0 or whatever that is? >> although, there's that backpack, maybe that's a counterweight. >> greg: in that picture, the teacher is also wearing the mask once again below the nose so, i believe that this is somebody that is definitely trolling. all right, we have to move on. that's any favorite story. it will continue to be my favorite story. off ear going to read the benefits of that. up next, the 2024 republican addiction gets smeared.
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desantis of rape but it's okay, because the accusations are fake. it's an anti-desantis smear that once again shows hollywood's
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bias is clear. for the season finale of the legal drama, "the good fight," popular of female purchasers of single serving meals, apparently the good fight is a legal drama and not hunter brawling with a hooker. the plot featured a gay character claiming to have been sexual assaulted by florida governor ron desantis only to confess he was lying later in the show, which raises the question -- why make desantis commit a fictional assault when you have democrats committing real ones? [ applause ] you ever hear -- anybody hear of ed buck? look him up? and if you want to portray a real life sex pest governor, cast andrew cuomo for a cameo. he's available i feel we should roll a clip, barbara. >> i offered my political services to government desantis.
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he saw me in my bicycle shorts, worn purely for medical reasons. ron invited me to cpac so i could work on his speech. and then, and there, he drugged me and forced me into oral sex. >> greg: hmm, in your dreams why am i talking the a fictional characterer? i don't knowment. the guy goes on to claim he has dna proof of the assault. but he's a recurring character who always causes trouble. think brian kilmeade, but interesting. eventually, they bust him for lying. >> where did governor desantis assault you? hwa hotel? >> the sherr ton. >> the governor changed the hotels a the last minute. he was staying at the hyatt. >> what's wrong. you tell me what hotel you want it to be. ron desantis is going to win
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unless you use this. a lie? yeah, a lie. what does it matter? you want this because you want desantis. i want trump to be ahead in the polling. >> greg: so, it's all trump's fault bet you didn't see that coming. the people defending this episode say it's harmless. the bad guy gets caught. the show is not accusing desantis of anything. it's breaking new ground of republican bashing to make a popular figure a fictional rapist and creating a fictional sex crime using real people as suspects. this should bother everyone regardless of political stripe. it's to distract us from what hollywood does best which is giving standing ovations to actual rapists. >> roman polanski for "the pianist."
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[ applause ] >> greg: tyrus, one thing to write a characterer that's based on someone but they're using his real name. >> it's not just that -- it's beyond that, okay? first of all, this seems to be a constant thread with the left where they like to go after, quote, alpha males and their wives. you know? ron desantis is a happily married heterosexual man. so, of course, he's secretly gay and he's not just any gay, he's evil gay. he drugs and makes men forced -- and even though you don't prove it, it puts the thought in everyone's mind. that's the go-to. you see that all the time when men are being attacked, that's always the thing. on top of that, you then back it up by saying, it's a lie, because it's by president trump. all of that was to get people to talk. when people hear things like that, they're not concerned it's a fictitious episode.
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by the time it goes from one to another, it's report. it's this or that. that's the message to get it out there. desantis didn't answer them. they were going after him and saying they didn't do -- he was in the hospital with his wife during her cancer treatments. they were trying to make it sound like something else. they will try anything just to get the idea out. it's a sup ldub limbal message o get someone somewhere -- because it's not like false accusations are not profitable, thanks for investigations, right? but you get someone to come forward to say it. you can't denounce them because there's truth to it because this tv series wouldn't pick it up. it was a blatant attack on him, on president trump, on the republican party. and once again, marriage, being straight white male in this country is open game. if he was gay and they ran he was drugging women, this would be a huge issue and the show would be cancelled.
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>> greg: what do you make of the gay character? that was the most stereotypical flamboyant treatment like watching barney miller in the '70s when they had gay characters come out. you knew he was gay because he wore a scarf. put him in a scarf. that's how they did it. >> that's the only couple of seconds of that show that i've ever seen. i've never even heard of it. >> used to be called " the good wife." >> never heard of that either. >> greg: them she left and now it's the good fight >> are you kidding me? >> greg: i'm serious >> wasn't the good fight that caused the wife to leave? >> greg: i this i so the good wife who caused the fight, chris knock. what happened to him? >> he died on a peloton. >> greg: he died on a peloton that was sex in the city. what's going on here. >> i've also never seen sex in the city. >> greg: oh, it's fantastic. >> great. desantis didn't say anything about this yet.
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i hope he doesn't. it's great that he just doesn't say -- he's like, whatever, i'm busy. like he's too busy. you know? okay, that's fine. and people -- i love people were getting mad tweeting about it saying okay, this is so horrible to say about desantis and you keep watching and it's actually against trump. it's the series finale of the show so the show is done. >> greg: yeah, it's over. >> got me to know what it is right in the last second. >> greg: exactly go back and stream it? >> no. >> greg: no what do you make of this? was it some kind of stunt? it make you sick to your stomach or are you used to being sick at your stomach so you couldn't even tell? . >> yeah, i had the oysters at subway sandwich yesterday. they're rolling out a new program. didn't sit quite well again, my problem with this is like "the good wife," "the good
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fight," we got "the good doctor," we've got "the good place," come up with the new title. i can't keep track of these shows. i don't know what the show is. it it is an issue in hollywood, they're all democrats. they all have to do these things. and sometimes it's like a little much. it's like thomas the tank engine. he'll come in and be like, you know, guys, my parents are dead. the government defunded public transit. and you're sitting at home and you're like, all right, we get it, we get it. jesus, can i just watch thomas? >> greg: kennedy, i mean, is this any different than what i do on this show with people like kilmeade? it just occurred to me -- it just occurred to me -- >> when you slip a mickie in his water and youb take him in the
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bathroom to help pull his pants up. >> greg: accuse him of things i didn't do. >> yeah, you do that the most to kilmeade. >> cath and kilmeade? >> yeah, just like every day for eight years or however long. i'm with cath. i didn't know anything about this show. but you know having to watch an entire episode of it is torture worse than water boarding. they might actually use that at interrogation camps. it's painful just to even watch a little bit of it. that's all they need. all they want to go viral is that tiny little clip of the show where headwig tells christine beranski that ron desantis made him do things with his mouth at summer camp. >> greg: beranski is in it? i have to eck which it out elon draws the line -- come to the office or resign.
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proclamation, get off your as and send a proclamation musk send a company-wide email, i love those, demanding employees work in the office 40 hours a week starting the next day. if they want to be babied, they'll have to wear a diaper on their own time. >> yeah. >> greg: it's what i do according to the bloomberg news, musk eliminated twitter's days of rest, which was a monthly day off for everyone at the company. yeah. he wants people to work eight hours a day, five days a week, for multiple weeks in a row who would ask people to do such a thing? other than, you know, most company, right? in my staff works seven days a week and only gets time off for funerals -- their own. >> musk stressed the importance of getting more people to subscribe to twitter blue verified but maybe twitter should look to other ways to
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raise cash, charge aoc by the word or five bucks every time kathy griffin freaks out. without subscription revenue, a good chance twitter will not survive the upcoming economic downturn. the road ahead is arduous and will require intense work to succeed. which is exactly what kat told her husband in her wedding vows. >> no, that's true. >> greg: it is true very true. do you think he regrets buying twitter? >> i think he might -- just you know regret it, but also might not think he didn't necessarily have a choice. because it was years of people saying that the algorithm on twitter was politically motivated. people were saying it for years. and people on twitter were saying, no, you're crazy. and all of us who work here, we all know that that was proven correct as soon as he took all over.
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exponentially more followers than before without doing anything differently. all of the people are complaining. now they're complaining now something is affecting them. they weren't complaining about something that is actually not fair. something not fair does not include not having to work five days a week. >> greg: their complaints are -- >> the way they're reacting you'd think it's something different. >> greg: he's basically saying, if you don't want to come in, maybe you don't have to come in, maybe you don't need to come in, don't come in you work at home? >> i used to. in new york city, i had to stop because the burglars would come. and i didn't want to be there. >> greg: you didn't want to be there? >> you didn't want to be there. i figure let them do their thing, i'll do mine. it doesn't work, you know? >> greg: that pep talk you had with the audience earlier paid off it was a great crowd tonight.
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oh, kennedy. i like that he's doing -- i think that basically he's a lot smarter than people give him credit for. this is the bump that bumps in the beginning. you know? >> if your boss works in an office, you work in an office. that the's how things used to work until we got sick in ourselves in this notion that we have to make everybody comfortable. everyone gets to win and everyone gets to be comfortable. that's how a lot of parents are raising their children. it is going to destroy society. for some companies, yes -- if you need to work from home, find a company that has found that it's better for them and cheaper for them and go work there. but he feels like collaboration is very, very important and you can only collaborate properly when you're in the same space with other people who are doing the same jo yb. that's fair. and if they don't like it, they are -- there's still plenty of job openings where they can --
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>> greg: it's true i mean, the ideas that you get from people at home are never as good as the ideas that you get when you're talking to somebody in an office? >> that's the thing. this is where i would disagree with kennedy just a skoch. they weren't having ideas. they were sitting around deciding who was allowed to do what? that lit core group was. and if you have a job where you're allowed rest days and extra days and things like wine drinking meetings, you don't really have a [ bleep ]. job, okay? that's number one number two -- what elon came in and did was he's exposed a lot of things like i have recently discovered that i do, in fact, have black fans. didn't know that because they wouldn't allow me to communicate. so, now i'm getting brown and black -- hey, brother, good job. and i felt like i just broke out. like there's more than just me? you know? but, we laugh about it. but how racist and disgusting is that? no, noment. because i'm so
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controversial. you know? i'm always just -- me and my conspiracy theories. if you read my tweets and instagram, you would be like workout, kids, workout, kids, gutfeld show. wow. but they were doing that. and they sat in the little groups and be like, oh, we don't like him. he can't talk this week. now he can't do that anymore. i'm glad that happened. >> greg: once she had an iconic sound but now she drinks like a hound
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words -- is -- madonna losing her mind? kennedy, look at this, video of herself licking water out of a dog bowl is this the best work of her late career? what say you? >> no, it makes me really sad? >> greg: yeah >> she doesn't have to do it. she's a beautiful woman. she does not have to disfigure herself. and, you know, she's always -- she's always pushed the boundary. but now she's collapsed inside her own boundary. and it's sad to see. because i have been a huge madonna fan for a long time. and even when people got really mad at her for a number of things over the decades, i was
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like, there's something very artistic and forward looking about this. not this, sad desperation body dismore if yeah, i wish her well. >> greg: david, i see the silver lining for you this might be the time for you to be able to date madonna. you normally wouldn't have a shot when she was like normal. but i think at this point, you could actually date her, because she's -- her options are limited and you could still die saying you dated madonna. >> and she's rich. >> greg: and she's rich >> yeah, i could get into that. that'd be fun. madonna? yeah, the material girl? yeah. >> greg: you get the residuals. >> you know, she's doing her thing. the thing is, she's always been doing the. this was her job. her job is doing crazy sexy madonna stuff. >> greg: yeah >> if you're an accountant and you're 20 years old as an accountant, you uh can be an accountant at 60.
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but if you're madonna, you know what? keep going, madonna, go ahead. >> greg: i see your point you just want to date her, though? >> yeah, i think she's teaching home ec in british columbia now. >> greg: does she need a good close friend? >> i think she should have let papa preach a little more. might have helped her out. and that's all i have to say about that. >> greg: and that's all i have to say cat? >> i love it, good for her. she's doing all this stuff. now we're talking about her all the time on the show. what other '90s pop icons are we talking about? celine dion, we're not talk about her. she's not licking water out of a dog bowl. shame on you, celine dion for not licking water out of a dog bowl. you got something against dogs? are you -- >> like that video couldn't have
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taken long to to film. >> greg: it shouldn't -- i don't know >> call me, madonna. >> greg: we have to move on don't go away. we'll be right back.
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thank you, kennedy david, tyrus, our lovely studio audience. plus wednesday night with a dreamy trace gallagher. i love you, america. >> thank you, greg. welcome to everyone's late news. fox news at night. i'm trace gallagher, los angeles. breaking tonight, the next next governor of nevada will be a republican and fox news calling the arizona senate race as well. other key races yet to be decided. as arizona and nevada continue to tally tens of tho


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