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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  May 19, 2022 11:35pm-12:37am PDT

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alvarez, thanks from all of us tonight. jimmy kimmel, zac >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight, zac efron, alfonso ribeiro, and music from parquet courts. with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: well, thank you, thank you, thank you. oh, that's very nice. i appreciate that. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thanks for coming, thanks for watching. i want to give a special shout-out, as the young people say nowadays, to those of you breast feeding your kids as you watch the show. a lot of women tell me they watch the show while they're up late feeding their children,
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which is very intimate. a mother, her child, and me looking at them in the dark. [ laughter ] and so this story i think is of particular interest to you. there is a nationwide shortage of baby formula. part of the reason is because of the supply chain issues. part is because of a recall. and a lot of the shortage, the bulk of it, in fact, is because of this kid. [ laughter ] hogging it all up for himself. authorities are warning parents now, and this is serious, not to try to make your own baby formula. i don't know. i'm sure the ivermectin and bleach people could figure this out. [ laughter ] mix up gatorade, baking powder, throw in breakfast sausage, blend it real good, the baby should be fine. [ laughter ] that is a tough spot to be in, not having baby formula. what are you going to do? you can't go to wendy's and get them a frosty. you have to have the formula. [ laughter ] there's never been a better time for the supreme court to force women to have more kids than
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right now. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]immy: sp- elon musk says that if his deal to buy twitter goes through, he will reverse the ban on our infant former president, donald trump. musk said banning trump from twitter was a morally bad decision, to be clear, and foolish in the extreme. oh, good. we have the part-time deejay who makes flame throwers and cars that fart in charge of morality. [ laughter ] the guy who names his kids roman numerals will make sure they don't do anything foolish. if trump does go back on twitter, he needs a phone which he claims he does not have. he's being held in contempt right now by a judge in new york for refusing to testify, for refusing to hand over four cell phones that were subpoenaed by the state. he's being fined $10,000 a day. so far $150,000, which you know, that's silencing porn star money. [ laughter ] that's serious money. trump claims he no longer has the four phones they want.
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they were provided to him by the trump organization. nor does he have two flip phones he carried or a samsung phone he brought with him to the white house. in fact, this is the only phone he has right now. [ laughter ] trump says he authorized his attorneys to search mar-a-lago, to search his condo at trump tower and his mansion in new jersey, and lo and behold, nothing turned up. one of his lawyers claimed she searched his night stand and nothing turned up. some people might believe it. it's suspicious when phones all of a sudden go missing. >> she made 13 phones disappear, some with a hammer. 13 phones disappear. some with a hammer. 13 phones disappear, some with a hammer. the disappearance of 13 phones, some of which were hammered. anybody when they get rid of their phone hammered it? anybody destroy your phones before with a hammer? i've got rid of a lot of phones, i've never hit them with a hammer.
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i've got rid of a lot of phones, i've never hit them with a hammer. i've gotten rid of cell phones and i throw them away. you throw it out, right? throw it out, get a new one, right? throw out your phone, you start all over again. >> jimmy: that's just what he does with his wives, too. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it's a credo more than anything. trump says he hasn't used email, text messages, or a computer for work in more than a decade. i actually believe that. because i can't imagine him sitting at a laptop doing work. here's how i bet trump works. he probably has some former strip club bouncer works for him, named vinny st. cleveland, or bobby cabbage, or something, who stands outside his bathroom with a briefcase full of diet cokes while trump shouts things like, put an offer in to buy the indian ocean! vinny or bobby will use a burner phone to call a republican with an ulcer who has to explain the indian ocean isn't for sale. [ laughter ] by the time he gets done, trump's already asleep on the toilet. when he wakes up, it's time to climb into a golf cart and eat a pie, right?
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[ laughter ] that's how it goes. the other bigly question is whether trump will be asked to sit for an interview with the january 6th committee. the committee has questioned almost 1,000 people so far including ivanka, jared, and don jr. but reportedly, for whatever reason, they're still on the fence about interviewing trump and/or former vice poodle mike pence. [ laughter ] which i don't know, i say not only should they interview mike pence and donald trump, they should interview them together like a "real housewives" reunion special. [ laughter ] or maybe just turn the whole interview over to a professional. >> were you silent or were you silenced? i just want to make it clear to everybody. there is no subject that's off limits. >> i'll be interviewed by you, i'll be interviewed by the worst killers that hate my guts. >> what? >> they hate my guts. there's nothing they can ask me and i won't give them a proper answer to. >> the only thing that's wrong about that narrative is everything. >> sounds like there was a breaking point? >> it was all the scam, it was all false.
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i made a bad decision on -- one bad decision. >> wait, hold up, wait a minute. >> look at my african american over here. are you the greatest? >> wow. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow indeed. that's a big one right there. i'm surprised mother pence let mike sit down with another woman, to be honest with you. [ laughter ] meanwhile, oprah's former protege, dr. oz, is running for senate in pennsylvania where he lives now? i don't know. the primary election is a week from today. dr. oz, who's trying very hard to pretend to be a maga republican, wants everyone to know he has a friend at mar-a-lago. >> president trump endorsed me because he said i was smart, tough, and i will never let you down. president trump endorsed me because he said i'm smart, i'm tough, i'll never let us down. the conservative views that i have are endorsed by president trump. president trump knows i'm a conservative person. president trump endorsed me,
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calling me america-first. this is what president trump endorsed me. the reason president trump endorsed me, he gave a lot. my focus is to do what president trump endorsed me to do. president trump endorsed me. that's why president trump endorsed me. president trump endorsed me. president trump. president trump. president trump. president trump. president trump. president trump. president trump. >> president trump endorsed dr. oz for senate. >> i'm dr. mehmet oz and i approve this message. >> jimmy: that's not something to be proud of, dr. oz. dr. oz is so -- all of a sudden he's convinced there was election fraud, he's pro-gun, he's kissing up to ted nugent. it's embarrassing. at this point, bill cosby is a more credible tv doctor than oz. [ laughter and applause ] the truth doesn't matter anymore until you get sued. and one of the right's favorite fake news channels, oan, has been forced to 'fess up. yesterday they had to run a preordered segment admitting there was no widespread voter fraud. which is their whole thing perpetrated by georgia election workers in 2020. it was apparently part of a
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settlement that came out of a defamation lawsuit. i have to say it's definitely the most honest oan has ever been. >> i will now provide you with this updated report from georgia officials. take a listen. >> georgia officials and one american news network have reached a settlement which requires the following statement. as a result of our asses being sued raw, the cowards who run this network feel it's not worth losing their expensive boats over the stories we made up over election fraud. as part of our settlement, oan is legally obliged to acknowledge we know you, our old and mentally simple viewers, will buy more arthritis cream we advertise if you believe bill gates can hack into your brain. communists are turning your grandchildren into transsexual furries. none of what we say is remotely true. the staff and management at oan would like to wish you -- >> are your arthritis flare-ups keeping you from having fun with your soon to be gay grandkids? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wait a minute, i guess -- oh, butted up against some commercial time.
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we've got some major, major motion picture news yesterday. well, at long last, the trailer from "avatar: way of water" was released. the first "avatar" is still the highest-grossing movie ever. came out 13 years ago. 2009. three winter olympics ago. [ laughter ] the premise of the movie is water, a lot of water. there's so much water in this trailer, it should be called "dasani: the movie." [ laughter ] there are three sequels coming out. one in 2076. one in 3033. [ laughter ] then in a century to be named later. we have zoe saldana, sam worthington, and sigourney weaver returning with exciting superstar additions to the cast. ♪ ♪ [ burping sound ]
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>> hi, guys! this planet is crazy. you want to do some yoga? hey, where you guys going? >> i know one thing. wherever we go -- >> oh [ bleep ]! >> this family is our fortress. >> whatever you say, man. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: congratulations. >> guillermo: thank you, jimmy, thank you. >> jimmy: he's half na'vi, half smurf, very cute. [ laughter ] this is something i wanted to
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get to last night. we ran out of time. in texas over the weekend, mma light heavyweight joel bauman beat reese forest at fury fc 61. after the fight delivered what was perhaps the most unnecessarily honest post-fight interview of all time. >> last fight i was tired, i was exhausted. i'm about to launch this nft that's going to change the fight game. i put in 30 all-nighters before that fight, i had herpes before that fight, two outbreaks in the span of a week, i'm here. i'm healthy, let's go, whatever. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i think we found our next bachelor. [ cheers and applause ] today's big sports story is that tom brady has already lined up his next gig. tom brady has signed a long-term deal to become the lead nfl analyst for fox sports once he decides to retire from playing. there are rumors it is a 10 year, $375 million deal.
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see, his father always told him, make sure you have a backup plan in case the whole football thing doesn't pan out, and he did. fox says this job is waiting for tom whenever he stops playing, which i have very bad news. tom brady will be playing three years after he's dead. [ laughter ] tom brady is not going to stop playing. tom plays for the buccaneers in florida, where they're hard at work right now scouring textbooks for offensive content. the florida department of education is banning textbooks that don't fall in line with their idea of family values right now. which is a vague umbrella to be under. no one seems to know exactly what they're looking for in these textbooks. to try to understand it, we've been looking to find somebody to talk to. we found somebody, we invited her, she is one of the actual textbook reviewers in florida. she's standing by. say hello to tammy tate. hi, tammy, how are you? [ cheers and applause ] >> hi, thank you for having me. >> jimmy: no, thank you for doing this. so you're a volunteer textbook reviewer there in the state capital, right?
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>> that's correct, i am. >> jimmy: i have to be honest, i've read about this but none of it makes much sense. can you walk me through the process? what specifically are you looking for? >> okay. mostly the devil. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the devil? like satan, the devil? >> no, not satan specifically. just more like his handiwork. you know? like -- okay, for example, this math book. if you want to call it that. let's see. this problem. do you see this? >> jimmy: uh-huh, i do, which one? okay, chan drinks six more glasses of water than becky, becky drinks five glasses of water -- >> yeah, chan drinks six more glasses of water. how is that fair? white girls get thirsty too. is chan some kind of -- >> jimmy: i don't think race -- it's a math problem. >> i think it's a problem-problem. why does chan get six more glasses of water than my daughter? >> jimmy: what? wait. becky is your daughter? >> well, she was. until she died from dehydration because chan drank all her
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water. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i don't think that has anything really to do with any of the stuff that you're worried about here. >> okay. of course. so look at this one. look at this one here. >> jimmy: okay. andy says he can find 9 plus 5 by starting with 9 plus 1 equals 10 -- okay, all right. >> why is this hussy wearing a leather jacket? [ laughter ] why is this little boy looking at me like that with his neck all crooked? and why is his hand in his pocket? what's he got in there, a drug? maybe a gay boner? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wait a minute. i'm not sure this is -- okay, you know what, i think i should say good-bye. i don't know that we're -- >> yeah, i'm canceled now, you're canceling me. >> jimmy: no, i'm not -- >> i'm not going to let you cancel me. look at this. >> jimmy: what? social and emotional learning: the quest for knowledge. yeah, you guys don't like social -- that's a big buzz word, social and emotional learning. >> no, we don't like musicals. >> jimmy: oh. >> math for musicals?
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>> jimmy: uh-huh? >> you start singing and dancing during math, next thing you know my cute heterosexual 12-year-old son keaton is going to be asking me to get him and his friend a technicolored dream coat for chanukah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're jewish? >> no, i'm not, but if this math book had its way, i would be, we'd all be jewish. >> jimmy: i can't argue with you on that. what are you doing with the books you ban? it seems wasteful to just throw them away. >> we've been recycling them. >> jimmy: oh, all right. that's surprising. that's good, i guess. >> we've been making them into firestarters. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: tammy, you're inside a school, maybe not a great idea. >> well, this school is infested with critical race theory, we've got to burn it down and start over, like we did when it had bedbugs the first time. >> jimmy: the first time, all right. good-bye, tammy, thank you. >> good-bye, gay world! >> jimmy: thank you, tammy. [ cheers and applause ] that was a woman named tammy. we have a good show for you
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tonight. alfonso ribeiro is here. [ cheers and applause ] we have music from parquet courts. we'll be right back with zac efron! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ panera chefs have crafted a masterpiece... succulent, seared chicken... a secret aioli... clean ingredients... in a buttery brioche roll. made fresh, to leave you... speechless. panera's new chef's chicken sandwiches.
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, there. tonight, he is the host of "america's funniest videos." alfonso ribeiro is with us. [ cheers and applause ] then later, from new york, their album is called "sympathy for life," parquet courts from the mercedes eq stage. [ cheers and applause ] tomorrow night, dana carvey and science bob pflugfelder will join us for impressions and explosions. please join us then. you know our first guest from three "high school musicals," two "neighbors," and one sunscreen-slathered "baywatch."
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his latest is stephen king's "firestarter." it's in theaters and on peacock starting friday. please welcome zac efron. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: every time you're here -- [ cheers and applause ] can i tell you something very sad? the only woman that screams at me when i walk in a room is my aunt chippy. [ laughter ] every time you get that. do you think you'll be 80 and that will still be happening? >> i mean, the way things are going. [ cheers and applause ] we'll see. >> jimmy: i know you've been traveling a lot. you have your netflix travel show that you've been doing. >> right, right, "down to earth." >> jimmy: first season, where did you go?
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iceland? >> we went all over the world. >> jimmy: all over the world? >> italy, spain, we went to -- yeah, we reached everywhere in europe on that trip, it was fantastic. >> jimmy: then this time you went to australia. and then covid hit, right? >> yes. that's exactly it. so this time we showed up to australia. we had a plan on doing sort of a more international show. but covid was in full swing. so we did the entire season in australia. >> jimmy: you did every nook and cranny of australia? >> we found them all. yeah. >> jimmy: did you run into -- in australia, like almost everything alive there will kill you. >> right. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: spiders the size of garbage can lids. >> yeah. >> jimmy: did you run into that? >> no, no. i got pretty lucky in australia. australia's beautiful. i have not encountered many of the massive spiders, any stuff that's going to eat you alive out there.
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>> jimmy: good. >> i did make a quick trip to papua new guinea for a couple weeks. just to hang out there. >> jimmy: where is that in relation to australia? >> it's very -- it's on the same part of the globe but it's really far away. >> jimmy: okay, from here, yeah, right. [ laughter ] you would never be able to swim there. >> no, no. not really. it's hard to even get in the country. >> jimmy: okay. >> it's pretty wild. so i lived with these local -- this local tribe. they were from the sepik river. they're kind of well known as the crocodile people. >> jimmy: why are they called that? >> because they live in the sepik river and they worship crocodiles. >> jimmy: they worship the crocodiles? >> they do, it's their deity, their god. >> jimmy: wow. how do they worship the crocodiles? >> well -- they're in a very interesting way -- we went out to this river where they go fishing or i guess hunting or to meet these crocodiles. and they invited me along for the trip. i was like, yeah, sure, let's go, i'd love to check this out, this is going to be wild.
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and a huge group of 40 or 50 dudes all got down in this swamp area and laid down and sort of starfished out like this below the water. just their heads out. >> jimmy: you're at the point now where you're calling these tribesmen "dudes." [ laughter ] >> we became dudes. >> jimmy: that close. >> we became dudes. especially after this experience. so they all kind of laid out and were -- what i realized after a couple of minutes, were feeling around, more or less, with their hands for crocodiles. and every time one would swim by and touch one of their hands or feet or anything like that, they would, like, whistle or yell in order to cue the one next to them to whistle or yell, hey, he's coming your direction. and eventually these guys all just laid down in the river and they caught a crocodile. it was wild. they like jumped on it, wrapped it up, pulled the thing in. >> jimmy: they caught god? [ laughter ] >> yes, yes. they did. they did. >> jimmy: then what did they do? once they catch the crocodile? >> after they caught him, we ate
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him. [ audience moans ] >> jimmy: they catch god and eat him? >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's a hell of a worship there, isn't it? >> it is. i don't know if they were worshipping this particular crocodile. >> jimmy: how did they cook the crocodile? >> three different ways or four different ways. >> jimmy: four different ways? wow. >> i think they fried it. there was a couple other delicious preparations. >> jimmy: which way did you like it best? >> i think fried, with crocodile. [ laughter ] it was a pretty unique experience, just kind of sitting out and picking which version you wanted to try. >> jimmy: yeah. >> everyone's watching. you've got, like, the whole families and everyone around. it was wild. >> jimmy: at any point were you sitting there thinking, boy, i'd like to go home? [ laughter ] >> it was. actually, that was -- i was digging it. i can't say it on tv. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did they know your work at all? had any of those guys seen "high school musical" over there? [ cheers and applause ]
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>> i think -- by the end of that trip, i kind of realized -- i was out there camping. i didn't have a cell phone. like, we were off the grid. >> jimmy: oh. >> papua new guinea, there's no technology. we were sleeping in one of the little huts they sort of had for us. that was me and, like, a lot of buddies. we were all kind of, like -- we were roughing it for sure. >> jimmy: right. >> by the end of the trip, which was two weeks out in papua new guinea. we were toughing it. it was actually pretty funny. a couple of the guys came up to me with cell phones, these are the tribesmen, and we facetimed their cousins and their wives and people living in places all over the world. they knew who i was the whole time. >> jimmy: what, really? [ laughter ] >> and didn't say anything about it. >> jimmy: wow. >> yeah, it was pretty wild. i was, wow, okay, i've made it everywhere. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you really have. zac efron is here, he's made it everywhere.
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he's doing a new series, a movie, rather. "firestarter" on peacock starting friday. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] what's with the double mcnuggets? oh, this one's my backup in case something happens to the first one. mmm. see. buy one favorite like 10 piece chicken mcnuggets and get another for just a buck right now at mcdonald's. ♪ we could walk forever ♪ ( ♪♪ )
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is zac efron in "firestarter." it is in theaters and on peacock starting friday. was that blood coming out of your eyes? >> that's blood. >> jimmy: blood, wow, yeah. that's a stephen king novel? >> yep. adaptation from the original stephen king, i guess book, then it's been made into a movie. drew barrymore was in it. >> jimmy: right, she played the little girl in that movie, yeah. >> the brand-new retelling of it. >> jimmy: you're playing a dad in this movie, which is kind of weird, right? [ laughter ] >> yeah, it was. i wasn't really thinking about it all that much. then it got there, a lot of people started pointing it out rather quickly. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's probably to you like, yeah, okay, of course, yeah, i'm of the age where i could have a child. other people are like, what? that's my zac, he's not a dad! [ laughter ]
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>> actually, that's -- i guess that's it. >> jimmy: i thought this through, yeah, i really did. [ laughter ] >> for me, i just kind of got to hang out -- acting is like doing a bunch of things you never thought you were going to do. that falls in line with acting, i don't know. you're going to do it at some point. >> jimmy: one minute you're singing and dancing, the next minute you're eating a crocodile. [ laughter ] >> yeah, exactly. >> jimmy: with a bunch of dudes. >> you never know. >> jimmy: you went to that ufc fight in vegas. when was that fight? >> oh, yeah, man, had a great ufc fight. i didn't have one, i went -- >> jimmy: you didn't get in there, mix it up? >> no, i saw chito, two weeks ago, something like that. >> jimmy: you brought a couple of pictures which i think are pretty funny. i wanted to share this. [ laughter ] there you are. now, this is the i.d. badge you have to have on if you want to get in the back, right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: let's zoom in a little on the i.d. badge. [ cheers ] [ applause ]
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was the security guard 14 or something? how did this happen? [ laughter ] >> i have no idea why he picked that photo, i'm not sure. >> jimmy: did you think, maybe i won't wear this? or did you go right ahead and that was okay? >> to my knowledge, one of my good friends is the commissioner of the league, steven cleback. i'm pretty sure he did that entirely to [ bleep ] with me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> and it definitely got a couple of good laughs. yeah, it was really funny. i just put it on, really excited to get in there. i started showing it around and everybody's going, "bro." [ laughter ] i'm like, what's wrong? it's not a legit photo? it says "teen choice awards!" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well done, steven. i don't know steven but sounds like he's got his stuff together. it's great to see you. congratulations. the very interesting "firestarter" is in theaters and on peacock simultaneously on
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friday. in fact, you could, if you wanted to, you could bring your phone into the theater and watch it on both. [ laughter ] >> what a world, what a world. >> jimmy: zac efron, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] we'll be back with alfonso ribeiro! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ the next sale is a digital treasure trove - charming ellie's private data! what? lot number 1: her emails. the ones she's opened and read. drug store purchases. her recent transactions. do i hear 600? 620? 640? 660? 680? oh! ♪♪ ♪♪
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porations so an online sportsey anbetting planr. they call "solutions for the homeless". really? the corporations take 90 percent of the profits. and using loopholes they wrote, they'd take even more. the corporations' own promotional costs, like free bets, taken from the homeless funds. and they'd get a refund on their $100 million license fee, taken from homeless funds, too. these guys didn't write a plan for the homeless. they wrote it for themselves. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: music from parquet courts is on the way.
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our next guest has been on television and show business since he entered his mother's egg. he's a race car driver, a broadway star, a "dancing with the stars" champion and former roommate to the fresh prince. now he hosts the unkillable "america's funniest home videos" sunday nights on abc. please welcome alfonso ribeiro. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> sounded good, sounded good over there! [ cheers ] >> jimmy: you know what, can i tell you something? you look good, first of all. >> thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: alfonso is a great name. >> it is. my mama named me that, i like it better than carlton. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm sure you do, yeah. don't worry, i'm not going to ask you to do the dance or any of that stuff. >> oh, thank god, thank god. >> jimmy: you must want to kill people when they ask you to do that, right? >> i won't say kill. [ laughter ]
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you know, i don't have a love for it like they do, you know? [ laughter ] i typically get asked to do the dance pretty much every day of my life if i go outside. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. if i go anywhere. it's like, i just randomly hear people, "do the dance!" you're like, i'm not dancing for you, i'm a black guy, i'm not dancing for you. [ laughter and applause ] not going to happen. >> jimmy: what a strange inclination for people to have. "do the dance!" >> like, the weird part for me is trying to understand what's happening in their head, right? like, what makes you think that you're just going to ask a random person to dance for you and they'll be like, "oh my god, i've been waiting for you to ask! hold on a second, let me get into character!" i don't get it, it's not going to happen. >> jimmy: i remember seeing you, i think, my little brother jonathan liked break dancing and stuff like that. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: you had those commercials, you were selling that book, right?
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>> the alfonso ribeiro break dance board and book. [ laughter ] had a cd with music in it and we were selling cardboard. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. it was for kids interested in that stuff. you'd be like, can you rap? whatever. we'd be like, yeah, of course! [ laughter ] >> yeah, i couldn't rap but i could ask you if you could. the greatest thing about that commercial was that i actually didn't really know how to break dance. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah, i wasn't really a break dancer. my brothers were. in the commercial they were the ones doing all the moves. >> jimmy: wait, you were a really good dancer. >> thank you. >> jimmy: right? i mean, no, like you were moonwalking in that michael jackson commercial and everything. >> yeah, i was a -- i was a good dancer and i could learn how to dance, i could learn how to do pretty much everything. so i did a broadway show called "the tap dance kid." i got the job having never tap danced. >> jimmy: how old were you when you did that? >> the premiere i was 12 but i started at 11. i learned to tap dance for a year, then we premiered on
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broadway. >> jimmy: this director said, hey, i know you can't tap dance but -- >> right, you're the guy. they did one month of rehearsals for five kids and i came out the winner. >> jimmy: the tap dancer. >> the top tap dancer. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> and so, like, you know -- michael jackson doing that. i could -- i could pop. i could do all that stuff. but i wasn't really a trained professional dancer. they just would teach me, then i would show up on stage doing it. >> jimmy: did michael come to see you in "the tap dance kid"? >> he did. we had done the pepsi commercial with him in l.a. i flew out here to do it. then he was like, i invited him to come to the show. >> jimmy: right. >> and i'm at home. and the phone rings. and i answer the phone, right? back then we didn't have cell phones, you just had to be home when it rang, right? >> jimmy: right. >> the phone rang. "hi, is alfonso there?" "who's this?" "hi, it's michael." "shut up."
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click. i hung up on him. he rang back. "hey, it's michael no, seriously that watch i gave you --" i'm like, oh, it's michael. [ laughter ] he said, "i'm coming to new york --" i don't know why i'm doing the voice still. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he gave a 12-year-old a watch? >> he gave me a transformer watch as a gift for doing the commercial. then he came and did the show -- came to watch the show, sat in the front row. it was absolutely amazing. >> jimmy: you were friendly with him? >> we did, we hung out a bit. i'd come to l.a. the funny story is, so he was doing the "victory" tour with his brothers. came to new york. he invited me and my dad. we went, then went to his hotel afterwards to kind of go hang out, right? so he was staying at the hemsley palace in new york. >> jimmy: right, yeah. >> big hotel, amazing hotel. we get in there, and there's literally the who's who in the lobby trying to go up to see michael. security's like, no, no, no, he's not seeing anybody.
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mayor ed koch. no, no, sorry. "hey, alfonso, come on." i walk through the line, i go up. he's got three floors of the hotel. and the top floor was a dance studio. we were in that hotel room until 5:00 in the morning with my dad there -- >> jimmy: i like that you threw in "with my dad there." [ laughter and applause ] >> i threw that in. >> jimmy: dad watching very closely. >> i don't want y'all thinking -- y'all have dirty minds. y'all have dirty minds. >> jimmy: don't think that went unnoticed. >> we was cool, we was cool, y'all all wrong. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. >> yeah, we went and danced, he showed me all kinds of his moves. it was an incredible night. >> jimmy: that is really crazy to have that in your childhood. >> yeah, then i would come out here and i would go to the encino house. you know, i met all the animals. >> jimmy: you did? bubbles the chimp and everything? >> i didn't meet bubbles, i met louis the llama. >> jimmy: louis the llama. >> it was louis, he had a bunch
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of birds, bubbles wasn't there that day. but i met janet jackson that day. i was a 12-year-old, hee hee hee! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, right. at that time, so when you did "silver spoons," i remember, "fresh prince" came on -- [ cheers and applause ] almost the same time as "america's funniest home videos" which you are currently hosting now. >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: that's how long that show's been on the air. >> 32nd season of "afv." >> jimmy: 32nd season. [ cheers and applause ] >> yes. and bob did it. bob saget was the original host. and he did a special. abc loved it. they created a series and started running the series. he did that i think six seasons. >> bob, tom bergeron, and dan rather, right? sir richard attenborough? then you. you've been doing it for how long now? >> i just finished my seventh season. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: you know, people thought i think when youtube came around, one of my first thoughts was, "that's the end of america's funniest home videos." >> yes, i think the difference is if you go and find videos online, it could take you anywhere. you could end up watching videos you don't really want to see or don't want your kids to see. >> jimmy: right. >> we've done all that work for you. so you'll be on your phone or whatever watching for two hours, and you might see eight or nine good videos. but we're putting together, you know, a couple hundred videos in one hour and you can sit with your family and watch the traditional way. >> jimmy: do you help weed through these videos? >> not at all. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay, yeah. you're seeing them for the first time. >> so i will obviously, you know -- i prepare the voice-overs, right? we do the voice-overs. i'll see those videos. but i won't watch the whole show. before the pandemic, right, we would have an audience. i wanted to still be able to laugh and enjoy the show. >> jimmy: right. >> all the videos that i didn't have to do voice-over on, i would ultimately get to watch those while we were doing the
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taping and make the taping. >> jimmy: it finally makes sense to me. it's great to see you. >> yes. >> jimmy: and the show, if you haven't heard of it, it's called "america's funniest home videos." [ laughter ] what they do, there are these videos from america, they're crazy. they're funny. sunday nights, 7:00, abc. alfonso ribeiro, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] be back with parquet courts! >> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live!" concert series is presented by the s class from mercedes-benz.
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for state controller, only yiu will save taxpayers money. wait, who, me? me? no, not you. yvonne yiu. yvonne yiu. not me. good choice.
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for 25 years, yiu worked as an executive at top financial firms. managed hundreds of audits. as mayor, she saved taxpayers over $55 million. finding waste. saving money. because... yiu is for you. yiu is for you. exactly. yvonne yiu. democrat for controller. >> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live!" concert series is presented by mercedes eq. all electric, all mercedes. >> jimmy: thanks to zac efron and alfonso ribeiro. apologies to matt damon. we did run out of time for him. tomorrow night, dana carvey and science bob will be with us. "nightline" is next but first, this is their album, "sympathy for life." here with the song, "walking at a downtown pace," parquet courts! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ i'm making plans for the day all of this is through ♪ ♪ seeing my path and hearing the song i'll sing and food that i'll taste ♪ ♪ and all the drinks that i'll consume return the smile ♪ ♪ on an unmasked friend as we take streets i don't walk down ♪ ♪ cause i want to avoid fighting temptation walk at a downtown pace ♪ ♪ and treasure the crowds that once made me act so annoyed ♪ ♪ sometimes i wonder how long 'til i'm a face in one ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ you'd be surprised to learn what you could bear to lose ♪ ♪ wanting and needing not getting either one and planning the future ♪ ♪ as if time is yours to choose pick out a movie ♪ ♪ a sandwich from a screen yeah how many days in life will i spend underground ♪ ♪ hours in total as many as it takes and how many ways ♪ ♪ of feeling lousy have i found lately uncounted ♪ ♪ i've found a reason to exist written on the tile ♪ ♪ of the platform wall begging not to go extinct to all those who saw ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ on the other side waiting
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there for me ♪ ♪ nothing left to want cashing in my claim to a life ♪ ♪ lived mostly free ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, best defense. as vladimir putin threatens nuclear confrontation with the west. we go inside one of america's strongest deterrents, 60 stories down in the ocean. >> i'd say it's the most powerful force in the world right now. >> the "uss maine" where the men and women endure long deployments without the internet and the comforts of home. >> so not a lot salad and fresh fruit at the end of the deployment? >> no, ma'am. >> reporter: finding ways to stay sane on the sea. ♪ while doing their duty. plus -- ♪ 100,000 things to see ♪ >> "whole new world." barrier-breaking representation on broadway. for the first time the lead charac

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