tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC September 26, 2022 11:35pm-12:37am PDT
jimmy kimmel is next. >> lou: from brooklyn, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- amy schumer, charlamagne tha god, and music from run the jewels. presented by "seize the night & day," with cleto and the cletones, and now -- jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hello brooklyn! thank you. please be seated.
you're embarrassing. i missed you too. thank you very much. it's great to be here. very kind. please sit. i'll be here all week. i don't want to use it all up. thank you for joining us and thank you for watching, on our first night from b.a.m. -- the brooklyn academy of music. we haven't been to new york since 2019. have we missed anything? how's mayor deblasio doing? good? he still kickin' ass? i love being back here. the people in brooklyn -- everyone thinks you're rude, it's not true. the people in this city are as warm as that weird air that blows out of the subway grates. they're the greatest. don't get me wrong, i love california, but brooklyn has a special something we don't have on the west coast -- it's called water. speaking of water, we got a lot of rain here last night.
i had to watch a youtube video to learn how to open an umbrella. it is hurricane season. down in florida, they are bracing for hurricane ian w whose progress is being carefully tracked. >> here's what we see. it's a little bit misleading. let me explain. if you look at this, what you think you see is all kind of tracks here over florida and fewer over here. >> that's not what i think i see. you know, there's only one rule when it comes to operating a telestrator -- it's "don't draw a penis." yet we brought our whole crew here from los angeles -- 270 people -- and we're all staying in brooklyn. if you noticed people waiting for the light to turn green before crossing the street? they're probably with us. which reminds me, where is guillermo?
did he miss the show? do we have some big entrance planned for him perhaps? ♪ >> brooooklyn! make some noise! from zacatecas, mexico, known around the world as "el presidente," the big agave, mister mustache, the deala of tequila, towering at 5 foot 5, 245 pounds, your security point guard -- guillermo! ♪ [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he secret is out.
gee he has a clip-on tie. are you having fun in brooklyn? >> guillermo: a lot of fun! i love new york! >> i think new york really loves you too. people go crazy when they see you. it's like a pinata come to life. >> have you been on the subway yet? big changes are coming for the new york subway system. new york subway system. last week, kathy hochul, who is the governor of new york -- i guarantee less than three percent of you knew that. anyway, the governor announced that by 2025, new york city will have surveillance cameras in every subway car. the plan is to install cameras on every train, and then charge $10 a month to those who want to watch it. for real. basically, the subway is starting an onlyfans. which, i don't know, this is either going to discourage public masturbators, or really excite them. i like this plan, but how are
there not already cameras in every subway car? there are cameras in every aisle at duane reade. and why is it taking three years to get this going? those ring cameras, you just lick the back and stick 'em on the wall. but these won't be installed until 2025. so if you were planning to commit a crime on the subway, there is no rush. you've got plenty of time! earlier tonight, i was with joe buck and troy aikman at metlife for monday night football. the giants hosted their hated rivals, the dallas cowboys. who were you rooting for, guillermo? the giants started the season undefeated. to which the jets said, "we didn't know you could do that." the rivalry between the giants and cowboys goes back a long way, bt no rivalry in professional sports generates as
much hatred as the yankees and red sox. we came at a fun time for new york baseball. the yankees and mets are both headed to the playoffs. aaron judge is hitting home runs like crazy. and the red sox are in last place. so we decided to send a crew to boston, right outside fenway park, to see if we could get red sox fans to switch sides and cheer for the yankees in a special bitter baseball rivalry edition of "traitor schmoes." ♪ >> tell us your name. >> jean. >> where are you from? >> hanover. >> big red sox fan? >> big, yeah. >> you guys big red sox fans? how important is it to raise charlie as a red sox fan? >> it's of utmost importance, above education, morals,
religion. he's going to be a red sox fan. >> what do you love about the red sox? >> i'm from boston. it's ride or die, 617 until i die. >> how do you feel about the yankees? >> i don't. go red sox! ] hate theyanks. >> that was great. i hate to ask you this. we're trying to do this thing about unity and something that transcends sports. if i can get you to toss onto new york here, real quick. it's a goof. this is a giant one. you can put the whole thing right over. >> ah! >> that's really good. talk a little bit about how much you love the yankees. [ laughter ] >> any chance that you throw on
a new york hat? >> you're really pushing it. >> i want to be a part of it, new york, new york, go, yankees! [ cheers and applause ] >> the big apple, more like the big crapple. go yankees! >> we're red hot for the red sox. we're yahoo for the yankees. >> new york is full of rejects and rats. go red sox! >> boston is full of losers and lobsters. go yankees! >> we [ bleep ] hate the yankees. >> new york yankees, they are the best. >> is that a new york accent? >> i tried. >> how important is loyalty to you guys? >> means everything. >> yeah. >> i love boston so much, new england clam crowder runs in my
veins. >> i love boston so much, new england clam chowder -- >> i'm from boston. we love new england clam chowder. >> wait, wait, wait. new england clam crowder. [ inaudible ] >> i love boston so much new england clam chowder runs in my veins. >> i love the yankees so much -- >> i got to say that too, the yankees? >> try it. yeah. i love the new york yankees so much manhattan clam crowder runs in my veins. >> i love the yankees so much new york clam chowder runs in my veins. >> edgar, where are you from? >> bronx, new york. >> excellent. big yankees fan? >> big yankees fan. >> what do you love about the yankees? >> everything, the tradition, the history.
>> any chancic ge i can get you toss on this red sox cap? >> no, no. >> you're saying a yankees fan won't put on a boston red sox cap? >> i will -- ♪ [ aplause ] >> we have a fun show for you tonight. charlamagne tha god is here. we have music from run the jewels and we'll be right back with amy schumer. [ applause ] ♪
>> jimmy: we're in brooklyn with our guest tonight. he's a popular morning radio dj and host of the show "hell of a week" on comedy central -- charlamagne tha god is with us. then later, atlanta and brooklyn join forces. their most recent album is "rtj 4" -- run the jewels, featuring greg nice and dj premier. and we have more greatness in store this week with guests -- david letterman, tracy morgan, mila kunis, ramy youssef, ben stiller, desus nice, jason bateman, paul simon, yeah yeah yeahs, future, and a couple of surprise guests too. our first guest tonight is one of the funniest people in all five boroughs and beyond. you can see her live on the "whore tour," and a new season
of "inside amy schumer" premieres october 20 on paramount plus. please welcome amy schumer. [ applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: how you doing? >> oh my gosh. thank you. >> jimmy: i want to start by apologizing because just a moment ago when we hugged and i was talking, i actually ate a little of your hair. >> oh. >> jimmy: sorry about that. >> can i have it back? these are hair extensions. >> jimmy: so i ate a little of a stranger's hair. >> somebody's hair. >> jimmy: i can't think of a
better way to start the week than with you. >> thank you for having me. this is a hot show. >> jimmy: it's very hot. that's what people are saying. >> this show, charlamagne tha god, run the jewels, what? i'm freaking out. >> jimmy: we play extra close attention to these weeks in brooklyn. the rest of the year is kind of crappy. happy rash hashana to you. >> thank you. i just started intermittent binging. yeah. >> jimmy: i've started that too. >> can't you tell? i'm wearing an actual mumu, i swear. i've been doing a plant-based diet, just edibles. >> jimmy: oh. >> yeah. >> jimmy: gummy fruits and what not. whatever you're doing, it's
working. >> i look amazing. i'm so blessed. >> jimmy: what's going on in your life? >> i've been mostly just kicking with adam levine. >> jimmy: oh. [ laughter ] have you? and your husband, i assume, is okay with that? >> he totally respects my choices. >> jimmy: good man. >> yeah. no. we have a good sex life. we do. we're there. it's brooklyn. i live in brooklyn. we're there. >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know, married people, have you found this? you're married. >> jimmy: yeah. >> did you know that? >> jimmy: oh yeah. >> we have found the best weekday to have sex is always tomorrow. [ laughter ] yeah. we ate today.
you know, maybe we won't eat tomorrow tomorrow. that will be a big day for us. >> jimmy: that's how you keep it fresh. >> it's weird to have sex with your spouse. >> jimmy: what do you mean by that? >> because, like, that's your family. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is true. >> holidays together, you know? he's my emergency contact. i'm supposed to -- disgusting. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i can see what you mean. it's like having sex with a favorite uncle. >> exactly. >> jimmy: how long have you lived in brooklyn? >> we just moved here. i lived here back in the day. the apartment is a little different now. >> jimmy: were these the old days with roommates? >> my first apartment, i found my roommate -- this was in a studio. if you live in a nice city and you don't know what a studio is, it was the size of this rug. i add a roommate that i met on
cr craigslist and we shared it. we watched a lot of "will and grace" and she was cool. you know, it was a dark time. >> jimmy: do you keep in touch? >> no. but britney, if you're out there, what's up girl? >> jimmy: did you live in any other boroughs or just brooklyn? >> i lived in all of the acceptable boroughs. i'm not going to say the one i'm excluding. [ laughter ] you know what it is. you know. i love pete davidson, but not enough to take a ferry. you get it. >> jimmy: you have a family, you have the whole thing. your husband's a chef. he's a farmer also. can he farm out here? any farming going on? >> my god, yes. i walked outside and he was chopping down a tree the other
day. >> jimmy: really? >> yes. he's writing his next cookbook. he has a james beard award, just saying. >> jimmy: right, yeah. >> yeah. we have a pizza oven. >> reporter: . >> jimmy: is that why he was chopping down the tree? >> i'm like what's going on? i don't know. >> jimmy: you're on tour doing standup. is it good to be back out on the road doing this stuff? >> it's amazing. you feel it. it's so good. it's been incredible. >> jimmy: you missed it? >> i missed it. you can tell the crowds are excited. we did just have a medical situation in the audience. in boston. i learned a lot about the audience that comes to see me. this guy was having a seizure in the balcony.
he's fine. i didn't follow up, but like, i'm assuming, you know? [ laughter ] no. he walked out. >> jimmy: you spotted this guy having a seizure? >> everyone is yelling help, so i put the house lights on. what do you do next? this is how i found out about my crowd. i'm like, we need a doctor. not one. [ laughter ] in boston. not one doctor is in my demographic. of course, i'm like nurses. like 30 nurses were there, but they were all hammered. let them have a good time. ives i was desperate. any "grey's anatomy" fans? i assume he's great. >> jimmy: i saw the first couple of episodes of your new old show "inside amy schumer."
it is absolutely hilarious. we're going to see a clip of that when we come back. amy schumer is with us. [ applause ] ♪ portions of "jimmy kimmel live" in brooklyn are brought to you by seize the night & day by idorsia pharmaceuticals -- because good sleep goes a long way. ♪ ♪ this... is a glimpse into the no-too-distant future of lincoln. ♪ ♪ it's what sanctuary could look like... feel like... sound like... even smell like. more on that soon. ♪ ♪ the best part? the prequel is pretty sweet too. ♪ ♪
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this is a crisis. we need more firefighters, more equipment, better forest management to prevent wildfires and reduce toxic smoke. and we need to reduce the tailpipe emissions that are driving changes to our climate. that's why cal fire firefighters, the american lung association, and the california democratic party support prop 30. prevent fires. cut emissions. and cleaner air. yes on 30. i'm a mom and i support the second amendment. >> i'm a teacher and so do i. >> no government has the right
to tell me how to defend my family. that's why as a mom -- >> as a teacher -- >> as an american -- >> i will always be proud to drive a tank. ♪ [ applause ] >> jimmy: that's amy schumer. this is season five or six of "inside amy schumer"? >> season five. >> jimmy: how long has it been since the last season? >> 2016. it's not a coincidence. i was incredibly depressed. >> jimmy: did they come to you and say please do it again or a standing offer? >> it was a standing offer. i just didn't feel like i had anything to say. i was too bummed about the election. i don't know if you guys read about it. and just all of it. but i felt ready to do it again. we had the best time. >> jimmy: do you believe it's an american's right under the second amendment to own a tank?
>> absolutely. yeah. look under your seats. you get a tank, you get -- yeah. >> jimmy: with this big gap from doing the last season of the show and doing this one, the world has changed a lot since then. >> not good. >> jimmy: did you feel that in your writers' room coming up with bits? did that affect you? >> yeah. i mean, we, like, had to talk about all the ish going on. it's unbelievable, you know? >> jimmy: right. >> the sickening stuff. the poor iranians right now. we're with you, women. we're looking at you. [ applause ] >> jimmy: do you find that the show is easier to get people to be a part of the show? i know you have guest stars and famous people interspersed throughout the show. >> i don't know if you know.
i've always lived in new york, but i love movies and l.a. and all that. i love the gossip. i saw top gun the week it came out. it was cute. it was good. i'm so impressed. did you know that tom cruise does all his own scientology? >> jimmy: i heard that. >> really impressive. >> jimmy: i read some multi-page think pieces on that. >> what can't he do? >> jimmy: would you ever move to l.a.? is that someplace you would like to live? >> um, no. >> jimmy: no. [ applause ] >> no. i need the stress of new york. >> jimmy: you like that? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you feast on that? >> yeah. >> jimmy: i noticed walking around this town that, like, parents will bring their children in any place, like into a bar. like, they'll bring a baby into
a bar. >> that's me. >> jimmy: you do that? >> yeah. actually i did put something on instagram. my son was asleep on me. it was so cute. i'm just like reaching for my drink around him. social services is at my door. yeah. but this generation, these younger people that i see, it's so different. it's like social media. i saw these girls. they must have been 12 years old. they were taking selfies and, like, they knew their angles. 12 years old. like, they did the trick we all do to make your leg look thinner. you put it to the side. i'm 41. i know my angles, okay? at this point the photographer gts in a tree and i dig a deep trench and i just kind of -- that's me. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: when you came up with
the name "the whore tour" for your comedy tour, i imagine you would be like oh, that's great. >> thank you for knowing it was me. >> jimmy: of course it was you. who's going to pitch that to you? >> yeah. excuse me? i was fired up. some newspapers won't print it, they won't put it up on the marquee in some towns. it feels like you're doing something right. >> jimmy: are you bringing your son? >> he's not on the whore tour. i have jay mcbride opening for me. >> jimmy: nice. >> it's a place for whores. it's not a place for children, but i come back a couple days a week at home. >> jimmy: you're not just out in a bus one city after another. >> no. >> jimmy: you're going back home. >> i'm going back, yeah. then right back in the swing of being mom. >> jimmy: what's the next stop?
>> baltimore on wednesday. >> jimmy: baltimore on wednesday. if you're a baltimore whore -- >> it sold out. >> jimmy: then you probably already have tickets. it's great to have you here. thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "inside amy schumer" on paramount plus and you can see amy live on "the whore tour" if you can get tickets. we'll be right book with charlamagne tha god. and we're the antonellis! do good, eat good. that's our mission. we chose our spark cash plus card from capital one because it gives us unlimited two percent cash back on everything, we buy. and it has no preset spending limit, so our purchasing power adapts to our business needs. we use our two percent cash back to help cover our employees' healthcare costs. that's how we take care of our most valuable asset,
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[ applause ] >> jimmy: goodnight, rusty. goodnight, one-eyed pete. goodnight, jennifer aniston. please, let me sleep tonight. ♪ >> jimmy: who in blazes are you? >> guillermo: i am the sandman. >> jimmy: how'd you get in here? >> guillermo: i came in the door. >> jimmy: oh. i must be dreaming. >> guillermo: no! you are not dreaming! >> jimmy: stop dumping sand on me, guillermo! >> guillermo: i am not guillermo! i am sandman! and i am here to help you fall asleep. >> jimmy: by pouring sand on me? >> guillermo: no, by telling you that insomnia doesn't just
impact our nights. it impacts our nights and days. you should talk to your doctor about how to get real sleep. >> jimmy: okay. i'll talk to a doctor in the morning -- >> i'm free right now actually. >> jimmy: dr. goldman? where did you come from? >> i've been living out under your bed. mrs. goldman kicked me out. would you mind moving over? >> good days start with good nights. talk to your doctor about both. visit seizethenightandday.com. sponsored by idorsia pharmaceuticals. hmmm. -good morning jen. shall we see how you slept? all right, sleep tracker, let's see the damage. oh! that's not good. you sound... tired. oh, thanks. what? when did i- morning! oh, great. there's two of them. good days start with good nights. so i would ask your doctor about both. calling doctor johannes. no, please, i can do that. all right?
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vote no on 27. it's a terrible deal for california. we win. you lose. ♪ jane wel jane >> jimmy: music from run the jewels is on the way. our next guest has interviewed everyone from fat joe to president joe on his radio show, "the breakfast club." and he has a tv show too -- watch "hell of a week" thursdays on comedy central. please welcome charlamagne tha god. [ applause ] ♪
>> jimmy: how you doing? >> hey, brooklyn! what's happening? a couple thousand people in brooklyn. i'm not nervous at all. >> jimmy: you shouldn't be nervous. you're a veteran. you're a god, for god's sake. you started, like i did, in radio and you're still in radio. you still have a nationally syndicated morning radio show. >> that's right, "the breakfast club." >> jimmy: i can't imagine doing a television show and doing -- really just you and ryan seacrest would do that. >> steve harvey did it for a minute. i've been broke. i lived with my mom at 31 years old after being fired from radio four times.
i'm not turning nothing down. >> jimmy: you never forget that, do you? >> never. >> jimmy: when they would fire you, did you always know you were going to get fired? >> no because they call you in the office and say things like, we're moving in another direction. they never tell you why. but i know myself. >> jimmy: did they ever go in your office and make sure -- >> office? i suffer from ptsd for things like that. 13 years of breakfast club, i do not have an office. that is the worst thing in the world when you got this little box with nothing in it. >> jimmy: you're saying you can never be removed from your office if you don't have one. great. [ applause ] >> jimmy: by the same logic, you can never get in a car accident if you don't have a car. do you have a car?
>> i do. >> jimmy: i can't believe we've never met. >> we have a lot of mutual associates. tiffany haddish. i saw you at tiffany's bl black mitzvah. it turned out to really be a bar mitzvah. i thought she was joking. i got there and it was very serious. like, she's jewish. >> for me it was very black. >> jimmy: was it? >> it's probably because i didn't know what to look for on the jewish side. to you, it probably was very jewish. to me it was very black. >> jimmy: you work a lot too, don't you? a podcast as well? >> i have the black effect podcast network with i heart radio. we're partnering with a lot of great podcasts, horrible
decisions. >> jimmy: yeah. >> nobody familiar? >> jimmy: no. >> this is gentrified brooklyn. oh, okay. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i wonder like do you run out of topics, do you run out of things to talk about when you're on the air that much? >> that's a great question. it's not that i run out of things to talk about. it's that i roun out of things care to talk about. i'm 44 years old. i'm married. i got four daughters. you got to come in in the morning and act like you care when you really don't. i'm not good at pretending. i'm getting to the point where i'm like, i don't care, guys. >> jimmy: how old are your daughters? >> 14, 7, 4 and the last one will be 1 tomorrow. >> jimmy: wow. >> my third just turned 34 friday. >> jimmy: do they call you charlamagne the dad? >> no.
they have no idea who that is. my oldest daughter understands because she's a freshman in high school. i realized when i went to the back to school function that they have, it was a lot of people there that listen to the breakfast club. i met one lovely cup who will let me know their son is in my daughter's home room and he calls her by her name and tha god. my 7-year-old isaddy, you're in the tv. why? that's a good question because i have no idea why. >> jimmy: are you having fun doing the tv show? >> very much so. >> jimmy: you changed titles on the tv show. it's different now than it was when you started. >> yeah. >> jimmy: why did you switch the title of the show? >> because corporate told me to. they said "hell of a week" read more like a late night talk show. who am i to argue with the people that do this for a living? >> jimmy: it's a good title.
>> it's not like i have a choice in the matter. >> jimmy: so i know you have a lot of politicians, a lot of musicians, a lot of pop culture figures. i know this is a question you get asked a lot. i'm not talking about somebody like oprah or something like that that everybody would want to have on the show. is there somebody off the radar that you've always wanted to have on one of your many shows? >> i don't know how off the radar it is, but the children's author judy blum. >> jimmy: you're a judy blum? >> huge fan. my mother is an english teacher. when i was young, she would always tell me to read things that don't pertain to me. i see these covers of books with little white girls on the front. i'm like, well, i don't think that pertains to me, you know? so i started reading. and the book-it program where
you had to read four books to get a free pizza. i guess that's why they say i look like a ninja turtle, because i really do like pizza. i used to run through judy blum books. it's like the stories. even though the stories were rooted in the experience of little white girls, they were anybody's experience. they had a lot of things with socially redeeming value. i feel like i got a lot of my early story telling ability from reading those books. >> jimmy: have you passed those books along to your daughters? >> what's interesting, i guess i talk about judy blum a lot. i've talked about her in my books. she actually sent me an autographed copy of "are you there, god, it's me margaret."
i gave it to my daughter to read. she wasn't feeling it. >> jimmy: she didn't like it? >> it really hurt my feelings to the point where i was like i might have to get her blood tests. how do you not like this? i want her to read it again in a couple of years. i don't know if she didn't like it because she didn't like it or because she's rebelling against daddy. she's in that phase. she's been there about five years. they say daughters grow out of it. i don't know when, but it's really hurtful when it's happening. >> jimmy: i know. what i remember about judy blum, i only remember the dirty stuff. a book called "wifey." we were passing it around the school bus and there was a lot of porn. bl blum. when it comes to dirty stuff, i
don't forget. >> i thought you were going to say the i must, i must, i must increase my bust part. that was from "are you there god, it's me margaret." before surgery was possible, people used to do affirmations. i flipped it. i say i must, i must, i must increase my thrust. >> jimmy: is it working? >> no, it didn't work. i'm very regular. >> jimmy: what did you do before radio? is that your first job? >> my first real -- i worked a lot of odd jobs. when i was running the streets, i was doing things i had no business doing like selling crack. when i wanted to create positive energy in my life, because there was this acronym that wu tang used to say was peace, positive energy activates constant elevation. i worked at a factory called industrial acoustics company.
i did telemarketing. i would call your house and try to sell you 12 cds for a penny. i worked att taco bell two week. my sister fired me. >> jimmy: that's hard core to fire your own brother. >> i deserved it. >> jimmy: it's great to get to know you a little bit. congratulations on your incredible success. >> thank you. [ applause ] >> jimmy:. hell of a week with charlamagne tha god thursday nights. at 11:30 on comedy central. we'll be back with run the jewels.
tracy morgan. "nightline" is next, but first -- the album is called "rtj 4." here with the song "ooh la la," with help from greg nice and dj premier -- run the jewels! ♪ ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ♪ ♪ ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee ♪ ♪ lookin for m's like i lost a friend jump out of my bed like where the bread ♪ you can hold the egg waiter bring the check when we talk we kalachnikov keep us in your thoughts ♪ ♪ fully dressed at the crack of dawn weapons letting off ♪ ♪ i can hear them from the block
see them creeping through the fog ♪ ♪ seasons greetings now feeding season can start oh my god ♪ ♪ look alive lookin' like i live life on a crooked line ♪ ♪ doing fine you want maximum stupid i am the guy ♪ ♪ first of all -- the -- law we is -- raw ♪ ♪ steak tartare oysters on the half shell sushi bar ♪ ♪ life a bitch and the pussy fish still -- her raw ♪ ♪i'm a dog i'm a dirty dog ha ha ha ha ha ♪ ♪ old dirty bastard go in your jaw shimmy shimmy ya ♪ ♪ got the semi and the hemi goin' gimme gimme y'all ♪ ♪ pugilistic my linguistics are jeru the damaja and i rap it pornographic bitch set up the camera ♪ ♪ ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ♪ ♪ ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ♪ ♪ you covet disruption i got you covered i'm bussin' ♪ ♪ my brothers a runner he crushin' its no discussion ♪
♪ i used to be munchkin i wasn't 'sposed to be nothin' ♪ ♪ y'all -- corrupted and up to somethin' disgustin' ♪ ♪ my pockets are plumper this season i love to cuff 'em ♪ ♪ i'm afraid of nothing but nothingness ain't it somethin' ♪ ♪ war mongers are dumpin' they'll point and click at your pumpkin ♪ ♪ your suffering is scrumptious they'll put your kids in the oven ♪ ♪ -- a king or queen and all of they loyal subjects ♪ ♪ i pull my penis out and i piss on they shoes in public ♪ ♪ people we the powers the product of this great republic ♪ ♪ no matter what you order -- we what you're stuck with ♪ ♪ i used to love bruce but livin' my vida loca help me understand i'm probably more of a joker ♪ ♪ when we usher in chaos just know we did it smiling cannibals on this island inmates run the asylum ♪ ♪ ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ooh la la ah wee wee ♪
thiss ne >> tonight, state of emergency. florida bracing for ian, powerful and dangerous. >> this is a really, really big hurricane at this point. >> mandatory evacuations under way. >> we weren't expected to come right at us, but now it looks like it is. >> people across the state boarding up homes and businesses. the tampa bay area preparing for what could be their first direct hit in a century. plus, escape from russia. vladimir putin's new military draft fueling chaos and a massive exodus. more than 250,000 fleeing. >> i think this does speak to the domestic political problem that putin faces through this mobilization. >> others are staying, taking to the streets in protest.