♪ >> jimmy: thank you for watching the show! oh, my goodness! that's a crowd. how are you guys feeling? good? welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," you guys. it's christmastime here -- [ audience member yells ] -- here. thank you so much, ma'am. [ laughter ] it is christmastime here in new york city. it's so exciting out there. streets are packed. it's crazy. in fact, police officers here in new york just found two chickens wandering around midtown. you hear about that? or as pigeons call them, tourists. [ laughter ] it's pretty fun. hey, happy birthday to chinese president hu jintao, who turned 68 today. president obama was going to -- [ cheers and applause ] president obama was going to get him a present, but it's a little weird buying someone a gift with their own money, so -- [ laughter ] this is cool. the madame tussauds wax museum in d.c. will open a new gallery next year, featuring all 44 presidents. the obama statue was pretty life-like.

in fact, just today, biden spent an hour telling him about his weekend so it just was like -- [ laughter ] check this out. a new study found that there are only 786 mountain gorillas in the world. and that number could go down even further after the premiere of the new tv show "sarah palin's congo." [ laughter ] i just saw this. a man in california proposed to his girlfriend while she was sitting on santa's lap at the mall. [ laughter ] everyone watching was like, "oh, that is so weird. [ laughter ] that is so -- that's actually weird." i'm not sure what to make of this. an airport in germany hired clowns to entertain travelers who got stuck in the airport overnight. [ light laughter ] so, wait, german clowns performing while you wait in the airport for hours? that's not entertainment. that's a dream you tell your therapist. [ laughter ] that's like, "wait this is awful. you wouldn't believe what happened."

here's some sports news. giants quarterback eli manning called a players-only meeting yesterday to discuss their fourth-quarter collapse against the eagles. >> audience member: go eagles! >> jimmy: at the start of the meeting, eli was like, "who wants to kick things off, other than the punter? [ laughter ] matt, please." and finally, a new survey found that women are more likely to have a one-night stand on new year's eve than any other night of the year. while men are more likely to have a one-night stand on any night women are more likely to have a one-night stand. [ laughter ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a great show tonight! give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ we've got such a fun show for you guys tonight. star of the giant comedy "gulliver's travels," the mighty jack black is here! [ cheers and applause ] can you get a funnier guy?

the greatest. star of the new film "somewhere," stephen dorff is joining us! [ cheers and applause ] big fan of that guy, too. fun show. and we got a special holiday song performance from our very own roots crew, right there, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] tonight's song in our all-holiday music performances this week are brought to you by pepsi max. want to thank those guys for doing that. the roots are gonna sing the christmas song tonight. is that what you're gonna do? >> questlove: yes. >> jimmy: that's one of my favorite songs, yeah. thank you guys for doing that. you're saving your energy, so this is gonna be good. >> steve: you don't want to blow it out. >> jimmy: no, you don't want to blow it out yet. yeah, yeah. speaking of music, this is pretty cool. last week, we had country music superstar john rich from big & rich stop by the show. we did a song together called "drunk on christmas." [ light laughter ] it's about going home for the holidays and getting wasted so you can deal with your family. [ applause ] a couple people know what i'm talking about. anyway, since then, everyone's been asking me, "jimmy, how do i get this song? i need it for my christmas playlist or else my holiday's gonna be ruined."

well, good news, you guys. the song is now available on itunes. there's the cover. [ cheers and applause ] there's the cover, right there. so, if you like christmas music or you like country music or you hate your family or you have a serious drinking problem or all of the above -- [ laughter ] -- download it today. yeah, just click on it and download it off of itunes. and i was thinking, hey, if you ever -- you guys saw the movie "love, actually"? [ cheers and applause ] yeah, where the guy puts out that novelty christmas song and it goes to number one at the end of the movie? if you like movies to be real, now's your chance. let's make it the number one song in northern america. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: above the mason-dixon. >> jimmy: northern -- yeah -- upper, upper new york. >> steve: upper new york and the -- >> jimmy: yep, northern michigan. yeah. >> steve: like the hand. like the peninsula. >> jimmy: that's it, yeah. you guys, there are exactly three shows before we go on christmas break, so it's time for that beloved "late night" tradition, "12 days of christmas sweaters." [ cheers and applause ]

♪ 12 days christmas sweaters three days left ♪ >> jimmy: that's right. every show between now and christmas, we're giving one lucky audience member a dope christmas sweater from the "countdown to christmas cabinet." and since there are three days left, let's open door number three. [ drum roll ] wow. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] it's a good one, right here. i'm liking this one. all right, now let's see who's going home with tonight's sweater. everyone look at your seat number. if i call your number, i need you to jump up, let me know where you are. quest, can i get a drum roll, please? >> questlove: yeah. [ drum roll ] >> jimmy: thank you, buddy. who wants me to pick their number, come on! [ cheers and applause ]

240! ♪ as i was just saying, you guys, the movie "gulliver's travels" is out. [ laughter ] >> how are you doing, my man? >> jimmy: how's it going? hold this. what is your name. where are you from? >> my name is rob from long branch, new jersey. >> jimmy: you're from new jersey. good man, rob. [ cheers and applause ] good man. so rob -- you got some nice sleeves -- sleeve tattoos as well. >> thanks. i was preparing for the sweater, so -- >> jimmy: yeah, you knew that was gonna go down, yeah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: do you have christmas sweaters? do you own them? >> no, none of them fit me, so -- >> jimmy: what? >> yeah, there's not many big and tall christmas sweaters. >> jimmy: i think this -- this guy actually expands.

he's pretty stretchy. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i think we can make this work. do you want to give it a shot? >> sure, what the hell? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what are your plans? you sticking around? >> yeah, i got in-laws in town, just hanging out. >> jimmy: that's fun. are they here tonight? >> yeah, right here. >> jimmy: hey guys, how are you doing? [ cheers and applause ] welcome. nice to see you guys. was it your idea to come to the show? >> of course. >> jimmy: oh -- good man, all right. well, hey, good. all right, here wo go, ready? let's try. let's make this work. >> it's like a woman's medium, or -- >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] ♪ >> we're good. we're good. >> jimmy: all right, ready? [ cheers and applause ] ♪ that looks really good! that looks really, really good, man. >> appreciate it. >> jimmy: happy holidays, buddy. wear it well. it looks fantastic, pal. >> thanks.

>> jimmy: give it up for this guy. it looks fantastic. thank you, buddy! one more round of applause. we'll be right back with "late night hashtags." come on back, you guys! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] th cover. a mascara for lashes that want it all... all at once. our biggest brush meets our fiberstretch formula to bring you a blast of volume and length. lashes that want it all want lashblast fusion. from easy, breezy, beautiful covergirl. now, you can make a splash with new water resistant lash blast fusion. to keep moving forward. [ koch ] for two years, samuel adams worked with the world's oldest brewery, the weihenstephan, on a new, champagne-like beer within the german beer-purity law. [ boyce ] at first we thought it was an impossible challenge. [ koch ] we took the traditional steps and rearranged them.

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♪ >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody, and thank you so much for watching our show. it's time for "late night hashtags," you guys. here we go. ♪ hashtags, hashtags hashtags, hashtags hashtags ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: these are lists on twitter where we give you the topic and you send in the tweets. now, a few weeks ago, i went on twitter and i started a hashtag called "oh, hell no." [ laughter ] it was really fun. we got a lot of great responses so, yesterday, in the spirit of christmas, i started a new hashtag called "#hohohellno!" [ laughter ] and i asked you guys at home to tweet us something about the holiday season that makes you want to go "ho, ho, hell no!" we got thousands of tweets. i watched them come in all night it was great. so tonight, i thought i'd share some of my favorite "ho, ho, hell no" tweets from you guys. here we go. our first one here is from @ajk. he says, "a snowflake mug, filled with chocolates is my holiday bonus? #hohohellno!" [ laughter ] thank you for all the hard work, ted. some hershey kisses.

this is from @ballstatebabe. she says "waiting in line at the mall, fat kid goes to sit on santa's lap. santa holds out his hands and goes '#hohohellno!'" [ laughter ] that is rude. that guy shouldn't do that. yeah, he should. this is from @mikedtodd. he says, "that's right, i didn't leave you cookies or milk, just like you didn't leave me a furby back in 1998. payback is a bitch, santa. #hohohellno!" [ laughter ] give him that furby. >> steve: a furby. >> jimmy: remember furbies? >> steve: yes. >> jimmy: and then, if you get two furbies, they talk together -- is the rumor. >> steve: yeah -- they're like weird gremlins. >> jimmy: but what would they do once they -- they didn't have a language, right? >> steve: they talked filthy, they were -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: filthy? they were filthy? >> steve: yeah, filthy. just awful language. >> jimmy: thank god. >> steve: they made longshoremen blush. horrible. >> jimmy: longshoremen. well thank god, i only got one furby. >> steve: exactly. >> jimmy: just filthy? >> steve: filthy. awful.

like - swear words that you'd only see -- like, you would imagine -- >> jimmy: like at a john valby concert? [ light laughter ] >> steve: okay, kids, ask your mom. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is -- this is from @cdevs. she says "you show up with plain m&m's when the holiday mix is available? like i want a brown m&m right now. #hohohellno!" [ light laughter ] people are testy these days. you gotta get the holiday mix. that's some good stuff. >> steve: you got to. >> jimmy: this is from @armenianhillbilly. [ laughter ] >> steve: come on. give it up for that armenian. >> jimmy: pretty good yeah. he says "i saw daddy kissing santa claus. #hohohellno!" [ laughter ] >> steve: prop 8. >> jimmy: this is from @marnes4444. she says "letting me know you can't afford to give gifts this year via e-mail with a signature line 'sent from my ipad,' #hohohellno!" [ laughter ] "i'm broke. i just found this ipad --

on the ground." this is from @luckymisses. she says "got your family christmas newsletter. it's two pages, eight point font, both sides? hohohellno!" [ laughter ] "i don't care what larry's majoring in in college." >> steve: i don't need to know this much." 8 pont font. they shrink it down. you have to get a magnifying glass out. >> jimmy: they got some long stories. >> steve: and it's probably on colored paper that matches the color of the font too. god bless them. >> jimmy: so it's hard to read or is it like a 3d thing? >> steve: yeah. no -- >> jimmy: if you hold it to your face, you see the starship enterprise in 3d. this is from @pdpl. he says "he sees me when i'm sleeping? #hohohellno!" [ laughter ] it is a little weird. it is a little weird, i didn't think about that. this last one is from @chelseafosho. [ light laughter ] she says, "you snuck in my yard and arranged my decorative reindeer in sexual positions? #hohohellno!" [ laughter ] there you have it, tonight's

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest is a very, very funny and very talented musician and actor who starred in the blockbusters "school of rock," "kung fu panda," and "tropic thunder." his latest, "gulliver's travels" opens christmas day. give it up for mr. jack black. ♪ ♪ holy diver you've been down too long in the midnight sea oh, what's becoming of me? ♪

♪ look out race for the morning you can hide in the sun 'til you see the light oh, we will pray ♪ ♪ it's all right you gotta get away yeah, yeah gotta get away ♪ ♪ diver yeah ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. [ cheers and applause ] wow. jack black! thank you, my friend. that is some entrance. thank you so much. >> thank you. [ light laughter ] i want to thank qwest. it was your idea for me to be the first guest in the history of talk shows to sing his way on. >> jimmy: that's it. >> it's a good idea. i like it.

>> jimmy: your entrance music. your walk-on music. [ cheers and applause ] you're the first guest with the walk-on music. >> i made history. thanks to you. thanks to you. thank you, roots. >> jimmy: oh my god. >> god, you guys sound good. >> jimmy: nice. [ cheers and applause ] you feeling good? >> i don't need this, really, anymore. >> jimmy: you don't, but you can do it if you want to. [ light laughter ] hurl it. thank you for coming on our show. this is the first time on our show. and you've done nailed the intro already. >> i love your show. i have to tell you right now. >> jimmy: thank you, brother. >> i am so proud of you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. >> because i've known you for years, many years, on the "snl" days we partied and rocked, but i never knew that you had this side of you, and there are so many people that have tried, even the legends of the stage and screen have tried and failed to do what you're doing, you know? and you do it so effort -- effortless -- effortlessly. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. thank you. >> but your chairs are really

kind of lame. i don't like this. [ laughter ] this is what your chair forces me to do. >> jimmy: i hate to say this to you, but you're wrong. that's how people sit. [ laughter ] >> and then if i do sit normal, then it creates a double chin. >> jimmy: no, no, no. >> i'm not fat. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you are so wrong. >> you're chair creates a -- >> jimmy: this is how people ♪ that's how people sit. [ laughter ] >> and then if i do sit normal, then it creates a double chin. >> jimmy: no, no, no. >> i'm not fat. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you are so wrong. >> you're chair creates a -- >> jimmy: this is how people sit. and apparently -- [ laughter ] this is how people sit, and i mean, we should get like commander chairs, right? >> it's also like i'm way in front of you. it forces me to be like, all right. >> jimmy: curl up. do a little carole king album cover? >> yeah. >> jimmy: little cat by the window sill. what's up, my man? >> how are you doing? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: we did some funny stuff on "saturday night live." >> yeah. >> jimmy: i gotta say to you, i mean, you're never not funny. >> well -- no. >> jimmy: every time i see you and you're just always scoring. you're just one of the funniest dudes out there. >> you're too kind. thanks, man. >> jimmy: we did -- we did one -- remember the "high times?" >> yeah, "high times" written by your announcer, mr. steve higgins. >> jimmy: that's right. [ cheers and applause ] >> "high times" skit. >> jimmy: he did the "high times" --

>> mr. steve higgins, is he even there? where is he? >> jimmy: he's getting high right now. [ laughter ] we cut to a pre-tape of him going -- we have a puppet playing him for the rest of the show. these hours are good here. but no, he wrote a bit where you were an investigative reporter. >> yeah. >> jimmy: for "high times" magazine. >> he did. yeah. >> jimmy: and you'll get just so stoned, you would -- >> yeah, they were all really stoney, paranoid ideas of what was happening in the government, but it turned out to be true stories. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. it got nominated for a stoney, did you know that? >> i know, yeah. i've been honored a few times by the stonies. >> jimmy: have you accepted a few stonies? >> i've never been to accept, but yeah. >> jimmy: via sat -- >> i hope they still consider me a stoney. >> jimmy: absolutely. >> a stoney god. >> jimmy: -- sometimes. yeah. we got to perform, quickly, i'll never forget this night. i don't know if you remember this -- >> of course i do, when you called me and you said, "will you rock with me?" you were opening for the

strokes -- >> jimmy: yeah. >> -- at roseland. >> jimmy: it is true. >> and i love the strokes and -- >> jimmy: they are phenomenal. they are the best. they've got a new record coming out. >> yeah, and we went up and you wanted to sing "feed the world"? >> jimmy: yeah. >> is that what it's called? >> jimmy: yeah, so "do they know it's christmas." >> yeah. it was like the british answer to michael jackson's -- >> jimmy: "we are the world." >> -- "we are the world." feed the world. >> jimmy: they're like -- >> no, who came first? >> jimmy: you know what -- >> but the thing is -- >> jimmy: -- i don't know who came first. >> -- but the thing is, we rocked it. >> jimmy: yeah. well, here's what's great -- what's great about it, what i loved about it, because we're on stage, we're in juicy couture sweat suits and we're opening up for the strokes just because they're like, "why not? let's let this guy be an idiot and open up in front of us." so we're jamming out. and mark ronson's on bass. justin stanely on drums. gerard bradford on the other guitar. and we're hanging out and we knew that you were gonna come out, but the audience didn't know. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's "do they know it's christmas" and it's, you know, really nice beautiful song, but when you sing it, you make it your own and i didn't realize the first line that you

came out to was "and the christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of doom." >> it's a very evil lyric. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's the actual -- >> yeah, and so i brought the doom and the death metal. >> jimmy: we have a clip of it. it's a home video, but -- >> oh, really? >> jimmy: yeah, we do have a clip of it. >> can i see? >> jimmy: yeah. ♪ ♪ where the only water flowing is a bitter sting of tears and the christmas bells that ring there ♪ ♪ are the clanging chimes of doom well tonight thank god it's them instead of you ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's the way to do it. [ cheers and applause ] people were going nuts! they were like, ah! >> it's fun to rock. do you miss the rockin' a little bit, getting out there on the road with the band and rockin' the land? >> jimmy: yes, i do. but it's fun, we have the one and only legendary roots crew. >> it's true. you get to rock every night. >> jimmy: you got the rock-out deal a couple seconds ago. >> i know. >> jimmy: that was pretty awesome.

i mean, they are the greatest. i mean, i love those dudes. they know how to rock out pretty hard. >> definitely the best on television. you are still rocking. [ light laughter ] you guys are so awesome. i wonder sometimes, because i was -- when you signed up for this show, if you were like, we're going to -- you don't have time to like tour with your albums anymore, right? >> jimmy: they do. >> i mean, like -- >> qwestlove: not as much. 14 weeks -- >> you squeeze it in. >> qwestlove: we squeeze it in. >> jimmy: two weeks ago, weren't you in amsterdam or something? >> yeah, we were in europe. >> jimmy: i mean, they go to europe -- i'm taking a nap and they go to europe. [ laughter ] >> but i have to say, you picking the roots to be your band was the master stroke, because -- [ cheers and applause ] -- they're just, they take this show to another level. >> jimmy: it really does, and it's fun, you can do whatever you want. do you still -- congratulations you have two kids. >> i do have two boys now, yeah. two little -- >> jimmy: they're cute, man. that's awesome, congrats! you still rocking out? >> it was nothing, you know, it comes natural. [ laughter ] i made some babies, no biggie. yeah, i've got two boys. >> jimmy: how old?

>> 2 and 4 years old. >> jimmy: congrats. >> so, sammy's old enough, i take him to movies nowadays, and -- >> jimmy: what do you see? do you see cartoons? >> well, i took him to see "toy story 3," which was -- >> jimmy: i loved it. >> i think it was the best movie of the year, which is weird to say, because it's a cartoon. >> jimmy: did he freak out? >> i was -- i cried thrice. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: dude, i lost it in that movie. >> i was having a hard time, because when they're going down towards like the melting pot, with the flames, and like the toys reach over and hold each other's hands, because they're like, "we're going to perish now," i was like, it resonated deeply, because i was like, "that's all of us. we're all going to perish." and i started uncontrollably just, like, and i was like, my boy's watching this, i have to see if he's okay. he couldn't have cared less. he was just like eating popcorn. >> jimmy: yeah. >> it was for me. it wasn't for the kids, you know what i mean? >> jimmy: i started balling like the first five minutes or something. >> yeah.

>> jimmy: when he's packing for college, and i was just like -- but you've got those 3d glasses -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: --to kind of hide your tears. [ laughter ] >> that's the best thing about the 3d glasses. >> jimmy: everybody's like roy orbison sitting around. yeah. who doesn't cry -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's just your mouth you have to cover up man. >> and then when he comes around the corner and he's giving the toys to the little girl, oh! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. no, you are not wearing glasses, my man! oh, good cover-up. good cover-up. swallow it! swallow your feelings. >> yeah, no problem. >> jimmy: swallow your feelings. hey, speaking of moving movies, "gulliver's travels." >> yeah. >> jimmy: got some heart to it as well. >> that's my jam. yeah. >> jimmy: dude, congratulations. >> thank you, kind sir. >> jimmy: that's a 3d spectacular. you play a giant. you actually play a normal man. normal-size man. >> it's a classic of literature. it's a 300-year-old book, and it's still powerfully funny and one of my favorite books. and we upgraded it a bit. i don't think upgrade is the right word.

we modernized it. now it's -- >> jimmy: you fight a robot at the end. >> exactly. there is a robot battle. >> jimmy: it's a little update. >> and it's in modern new york city. i'm like a schlubby dude working at the mailroom at a new york newspaper, and i finally get an opportunity to become a big-time travel writer. >> jimmy: yeah. >> all i have to do is go to the bermuda triangle, write a little article about bermuda and how beautiful it is. unfortunately, of course, i get sucked into an inter-dimensional vortex. [ laughter ] and wake up on a crazy, stoney island of tiny people that are covering me and have enslaved me, but then i become their hero and their god. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, which is phenomenal, because you're very peaceful. i like that part of the movie a lot, because you're like, "hey,

guys, i don't want to fight you." there's like a bunch of ships, like 30 ships trying to attack you. and you guys go in and they're fighting and they all start shooting cannons at you. you're like, "no, guys, i didn't want this at all." >> yes. >> jimmy: you're kind of a peaceful giant. then you steer them in the right direction. >> exactly. well, there's the bad guys, the little guys. there the good ones, the lilliputians and then there's the bad ones, the blefuscians. that i have to, you know, i have to protect my lilliputians from the wrath of the blefushians. >> jimmy: yes. >> and yeah, it's really funny and crazy. but like i said, it's got heart. and then before you know it, this happens. and you're glad you got the glasses to protect you. >> jimmy: yeah. it's very -- the one thing i like about it, too, is you come on this island and they kind of don't know anything about your world, so you can -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: i love -- you start putting on plays. and you're like, "i wrote this play." and it's the "titanic." [ laughter ] >> they don't know. >> jimmy: they don't know. and then they're like -- >> well, yeah that's the thing. >> jimmy: and they think you're jack bauer at one point. and it's really funny. >> and i wrote all the prince songs. [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: it's very, very fun. we have a clip of "gulliver's travels." here's jack black, you guys. >> no offense, but this edward guy seems like kind of a lame-ass. >> a lame what? ♪ it is my impression that lame-ass is a negative expression from whence you came. if this is the case, you should be thrown in the stocks. >> no, no, no, no! lame-ass means great, brave, courageous heart of a lion man. >> is this the honorable truth? >> yes, this is the honorable truth. >> then i am not just a lame-ass. oh, no. i am a big lame-ass! >> the biggest. >> i general edward edwardian am the biggest lame-ass in all of the land! >> heart of a lion. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "gulliver's travels" is in theaters everywhere christmas day! more with jack black when we come back, you guys! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: ladies and gentlemen, a special holiday presentation from all of us at "late night with jimmy fallon." ♪ ♪ come, they told me pa rum pum pum pum a new-born king to see pa rum pum pum pum ♪ ♪ our finest gifts we bring pa rum pum pum pum to lay before the king

pa rum pum pum pum ♪ ♪ rum, pum, pum, pum rum, pum, pum, pum peace on earth can it be ♪ ♪ our finest gifts we bring pa rum pum pum pum to lay before the king pa rum pum pum pum ♪ ♪ rum pum pum pum ♪ live on peace again peace again peace on earth ♪ and so to honor him pa rum pum pum pum when we come ♪ ♪ come, they told me pa rum pum pum pum a new-born king to see pa rum pum pum pum ♪

♪ our finest gifts we bring pa rum pum pum pum to lay before the king pa rum pum pum pum ♪ ♪ um pum pum pum rum pum pum pum live in peace again so to honor him pa rum pum pum pum and his king ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: merry christmas, everybody! we'll be right back! c♪ if you think all batteries are the same, consider this:

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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our next guest stars in the acclaimed new movie "somewhere," which opens in select theaters tomorrow, december 22nd. please welcome a talented actor. here's stephen dorff, everybody! ♪

>> you clean up nice. >> jimmy: i clean up nice? i was just covered in paint -- seconds ago. >> that was awesome. >> jimmy: thanks for coming on the show, my man. >> thanks for having me, man. this is a great show. >> jimmy: i noticed the roots playing a little "cryin'." you were -- that's right -- you were in -- you were in that video >> i was. yeah, a long time ago. >> jimmy: that was a while back. yeah, yeah. but it was fun. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you're an l.a. guy? you and jack are both l.a. dudes, so thanks for coming to new york. >> thank you, man, for having me. >> jimmy: doing it up. we had nick schwartzman on the show recently. i know you just did a -- you're in that movie. >> yeah, we did this crazy movie that adam sandler and nick wrote together, called "born to be a star" and it's hysterical. it comes out easter weekend, i think. i'm a big fan of nick's, he's -- >> jimmy: he came on the show 'cause he did a bit for his movie on the set. we filmed it but we didn't -- >> yeah, no -- you're in the movie, actually. >> jimmy: yeah -- unless i made the cut. >> no, my producer told me know, you're in it. he had crazy -- he had like super buck teeth. >> yeah, he had these crazy prosthetic, kind of buck teeth. and then i had 200 blond hair extensions and -- pretty out there. >> jimmy: you had like a mullet

or something, right? was that -- >> yeah, it was more like, kind of a -- remember that brad pitt "vanity fair" cover? it was very -- fabio? >> jimmy: mane? >> yeah, it was very -- >> jimmy: yeah, like a big mane of hair? >> yeah. >> i play a porn star in that movie, so it was kind of -- >> jimmy: yeah, i always say -- yeah, the idea of the movie is -- his name is bucky -- >> yeah, he's bucky larson and i play a guy named dick shadows. [ laughter ] and -- and adam is very behind this movie 'cause they wrote it together and that supports nick so much and -- >> jimmy: oh, like -- >> he's really happy for nick. >> jimmy: well, the idea of the movie is he realizes that his parents are porn stars and he thinks that he's -- he's gonna follow in their footsteps. he should be a porn star. >> exactly. >> jimmy: -- becomes hugely successful. >> moves to l.a. and -- >> jimmy: ridiculous. >> kind of like "happy gilmore" set in the porn world. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh -- very excited about that. that'll be good for you. >> yeah. well, i heard the sofia was really -- 'cause i did it right before "somewhere" so she was really supportive of that. >> jimmy: i heard that you had to meet elle fanning, who is your co-star -- really nice young actress. >> yeah, amazing. >> jimmy: is she 11 years old? >> she's 11, yeah. and i went there -- my first kind of duty from sofia in the

early prep of the movie was to pick up elle from her school, you know? and i thought there'd be a guardian or something but sofia really wanted us to spend time together so i went there and -- you know, on my way over there, my car was smelling like smoke 'cause i smoke still and i wanted her to wear a seat belt. i was getting nervous -- kind of responsibility -- >> jimmy: 'cause you're a single l.a. guy. >> yeah, i'm a single guy and i'm playing a father in the movie but immediately -- she's so smart -- sofia -- she put me into the head of the guy. i picked up elle and i had these crazy hair extensions in. i couldn't really tell her -- >> jimmy: from the porn star movie? >> yeah, so she's like -- [ laughter ] she's like "what movie are you making?" and i'm like, "oh, you know -- you know, it's a surf comedy i'm doing with jimmy fallon, you know." >> jimmy: completely, exactly. >> and she was like, "oh, great." and so, one of the things we do -- we went to "color me mime." i don't know if you've ever been there. >> jimmy: i've heard of this. it's a -- >> yeah, it's place where you -- i'd never been there before but it was great to go and -- >> jimmy: what is -- what -- it's a -- >> yeah, it's for kids, where you go to make -- >> jimmy: pottery. >> yeah, you make pottery and stuff, so immediately, elle kind of b-lines to the other room, where i guess she picks her pottery and i was kind of -- they were looking at me like i

was crazy with this hair and -- so i was like, "elle, wait up!" you know, "show me the ropes a little bit." and then, she's like, "oh, stephen, this is where we pick our thing." and then, you know, i said "well, let's make something for sofia, you know? this is a start-up present, as our characters." so she picked this really eloquent soap dish and was skating -- making an ice skate, 'cause she plays a ice skater in the movie. she does a beautiful job at ice skating. and i didn't know what to pick, so i'm looking around and in the corner, i saw this ashtray. and i was like, "that's perfect for my character but why is there an ashtray at 'color me mine'?" you know -- >> jimmy: kids love ashtrays. >> yeah. so i grab the ashtray. we made our stuff. elle was making fun of me the whole time 'cause hers was really perfect and eloquent and mine was really bad and then, the process is you cook them you know? and then you pick them up the next day, which i -- >> jimmy: yeah. >> when i picked them up the next day, i had to tell elle that mine turned into a masterpiece, which it did and -- something about the cooking process just kind of -- yeah, helped me out. >> jimmy: you can't really screw up an ashtray, really. to be honest, i mean -- >> no, no -- yeah. but elle was doing such a good job and i think mine, in the end, might have been a little better but sofia has hers and it was great. but i got through my first play

date with an 11-year-old and it was amazing, it was -- >> jimmy: and she has no idea, to this day, that it was actually dick shadow she was meeting? yeah, not even you. [ laughter ] >> i'm nervous about that, but yes. >> jimmy: tell me -- everyone what "somewhere" is about. it is a really cool movie. >> oh, thank you. >> jimmy: congratulations. you do a great job in this film. >> thank you. >> jimmy: and sofia coppola. it's all set -- well, most of it's set in chateau marmont hotel. >> yeah, it's about a guy named johnny marco who's just become a famous movie star and he's -- he's kind of a lost guy. he's kind of hurting inside. he's got everything on the surface but he gets a surprise visit from his 11-year-old daughter, cleo, and, you know, she's very much his parent through most of the movie, you know? she's tucking him into bed, she's cooking for him. this guy really needs to kind of step it up and come to a place in his life where he makes a change. >> jimmy: grow up a little bit? >> yeah. so it's kind of a story about an adolescent father becoming a man and -- elle fanning is just so great. >> jimmy: you're both -- everyone's great. >> sofia's just -- incredible director. >> jimmy: beautifully shot and -- it went to venice film festival?

>> yeah. we ended up going to venice, which was incredibly enough. and then, we won the gold lion, which quentin tarantino gave us. it was -- >> jimmy: fantastic. >> yeah, it was incredible. >> jimmy: and it's -- now it's on like everyone's top ten lists. you got a.o. scott from new york times, new yorker, roger ebert -- they're all -- >> it's exciting. >> jimmy: in their top ten list. this is our picture movie. >> i'm ready for the people to see, you know, 'cause i've been doing all of this -- i've never done so many q & a's and all these things for the movie, but i just want the audience now to get in there and -- >> jimmy: i'm so happy -- i was so happy for you and now you just knocked me out of the park and i was like, "oh we gotta get stephen dorff, if he's in town." >> yeah, no, i'm so happy to come. >> jimmy: i appreciate you coming on. i want to show everyone a clip of "somewhere." here's the great stephen dorff. >> hi, dad. >> hey, cleo. >> hi, johnny. >> hey, layla. >> what happened to you? >> just a little stunt work. you know, i do all my own stunts.

>> don't get her back too late, okay? >> yeah, sure. i like this. my first signature. >> thanks. >> it's cool. >> jimmy: there you go. there's your package. you gotta hang out with that now and be a dad. [ cheers and applause ] very fun movie. our thanks to stephen dorff. come on back whenever you're in town, buddy. [ cheers and applause ] go see his movie "somewhere." up next, a christmas song from the roots, everybody. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ 3q

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[ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: we're so lucky to have the greatest band in late-night here with us every night. here's there record here, "how i got over." you gotta go pick this up. it's phenomenal. tonight, they've gonna have a special holiday treat for us with a performance of "the christmas song." please welcome the roots. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ chestnuts roasting on an open fire jack frost nipping at your nose ♪ ♪ yuletide carols being sung by a choir

and folks dressed up like eskimos ♪ ♪ everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe helps to make the season bright ♪ ♪ tiny tots with their eyes all aglow will find it hard to sleep tonight ♪ ♪ they know that santa's on his way he's loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh ♪

♪ and every mother's child is gonna spy to see if reindeer really know how to fly ♪ ♪ and so, i'm offering this simple phrase to kids from 1 to 92 ♪ ♪ although it's been said many times, many ways merry christmas to you ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ and so, i'm offering this simple phrase to kids from 1 to 92 ♪ ♪ although it's been said

many times, many ways merry christmas to you ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: beautiful. the roots! come on! beautiful! my thanks to jack black, stephen dorff, our friends at pepsi max, and the greatest band in late night, the roots, everybody! stay-tuned for "carson daly." thank you for watching. have a good night! hope we see you tomorrow! [ cheers and applause ] ♪