oh oh oh oh ♪ ♪ come to me my sweetest friend can you feel my heart again i'll take you back ♪ ♪ where you belong and this'll be your favorite song ♪ ♪ come to me with secrets bared i love you more so don't be scared ♪ ♪ when we're old and near the end we'll go home and start again hey ♪ ♪ start again hey do-do-do do-do-do do-do-do do-do-do ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: goo goo dolls! nice job, guys. good job. thank you. i want to thank my guests -- andy samberg, bailee madison. and, of course, goo goo dolls. tomorrow night, senator ted cruz will be here. but jimmy fallon happening right now. jimmy! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

>> steve: from studio 6a in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. please, welcome welcome. [ cheers and applause ] thank you so much. thank you. hot crowd! [ cheers and applause ]

hot crowd! hot, hot, hot! stop the show right now! [ cheers and applause ] too hot in here! welcome! welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," you guys. you guys are feeling good, obviously. [ cheers and applause ] welcome to the show. here's what people are talking about. justin bieber has just gotten himself into more trouble now. i don't know what's going on with this guy, but now this time he's facing charges in brazil after he was not -- the monkey thing. remember when he tried to smuggle a monkey into the country? [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah, i heard about that. >> jimmy: now he's facing charges in brazil. he was caught spray painting the phrase "beliebers for life." [ laughter ] "beliebers for life" on the side of a building. they say bieber might have gotten away with it if he'd written literally anything else. [ laughter and applause ] anything else. could say it's not really him. but it's him. "jimmy fallon was here."

huh? bieber these days has gone nuts, he's gone mad, i gotta call it. yeah. he's picking fights, he's hassling the cops, spray painting walls. it's like he's reenacting the opening credits of "fresh prince." [ laughter and applause ] "my mom got scared!" [ cheers and applause ] oh, my gosh. did you hear about biden? >> steve: oh, yeah. >> jimmy: joe biden? god, he's just the greatest. i love joe biden. he's so good to our monologues. he's just the best guy in the world. [ laughter ] earlier this week, joe biden -- what a nice guy, called boston's mayor elect marty walsh to congratulate him on winning. but it turns out he called the wrong marty walsh. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he called a dude named marty walsh who lives in boston. >> steve: yeah, come on! >> jimmy: but in biden's defense, it's pretty hard to find a guy in boston who isn't named marty walsh. it's like, "hey, you marty walsh? i'm marty walsh. yeah, i work with your brother marty walsh." [ laughter and applause ] everyone's name is marty walsh.

i feel so bad for that dude. man, he can't win. [ laughter ] this is kind of sad news. blockbuster announced that it will close all of it remaining stores in the u.s. [ audience groans ] by sometime next year. or in other words, your local strip mall is about to get a curves gym, you guys. that's pretty cool. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ zumba! [ laughter ] that's right, blockbuster's going out of business. so it looks like now i'm the proud owner of a vhs copy of "true lies." suck it, blockbuster. [ laughter and applause ] i don't know why the company's losing, but maybe they'll watch a documentary about it on netflix. i don't know why -- [ laughter ] did you guys hear about this? the european space agency says that a 200-pound section from one of its satellites will crash into earth in the next few days, but has no idea where it will land. then those officials are like

but have a good weekend, everybody. take care. [ laughter and applause ] wait, what? 200 pounds is going to land on earth? crazy. people are crazy. oh, yeah, this dude's great, too. russian president vladimir putin will travel to the vatican this month to hold talks with pope francis. yeah, the pope even offered to hear putin's confessions, or as putin calls it, "bragging." [ laughter ] "you won't believe what i did this week, it's crazy. [ laughter ] i put one guy's hand on another man's body. it's hilarious." [ laughter and applause ] "craziest week, i really messed up, bro." i saw this on bethenny frankel's show. we love bethenny. but she had this guest on the show who was a medium. she was a medium, and this person was trying to connect members of the audience with people who had died. and to be honest, it really seemed like the medium was struggling. take a look at this. >> i feel like i'm around here, and i'm getting somebody.

i think that there's somebody around this area that has somebody deceased. is this your mother? is she m-a like mary or margaret? >> it's melvina. >> did you recently move? >> no. >> is there a child with you? or are you -- >> no, i'm trying. >> are you trying to get a child? >> yes. >> george, joseph? >> well, my grandfather and my uncle were jim. >> jim. jim. [ laughter ] okay. jim. close enough. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: what? [ laughter and applause ] i'm getting a strong sense that this is the letter b and followed by an s? is it like bull -- bull -- bull something? [ cheers and applause ] you sir with the coat? it looks like -- are you cold? were you cold at one point? [ laughter ] were you cold at one point today? yeah, anyone here i'm sensing someone in here ate food today?

someone -- [ laughter ] give me a break. [ laughter ] this is very interesting here. according to a new study, abc family and fox are the networks with the most gay characters on tv. when they heard that bravo was like "oh, what? ex-squeeze me?" [ laughter and applause ] say what? man, i don't know why this keeps happening. but this is just in the news. a teaching assistant at the university of iowa accidentally e-mailed her entire class nude photos of herself. >> steve: what? >> jimmy: yeah. it happens all the time. don't take nude pictures with your phone. does anyone know this yet? so ridiculous. a teacher, no less. anyway, the local news covered the story. check it out. it sure didn't take long for the news of an "oops" e-mail to spread across the university of iowa campus today. a university teaching assistant

accidentally sent everyone in her class an e- mail that contained nude pictures of her. as you can imagine, the t.a.'s mistake generated a lot of buzz among students. here's what some of them had to say. "i thought it was a really unfortunate mistake." "i always liked this teacher but now i really really like this teacher." [ laughter ] "i won't skip any more lectures and i'm going to bring my dad to the next one." [ laughter ] "i'm sure i'll get an a in this class after seeing those double d's." [ laughter ] "i picked the wrong day to wear sweat pants." [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm bringing my dad to the next one. dad's coming. [ applause ] i'm bringing my dad to the next lecture. oh, man that's funny. i just saw this. this doesn't surprise me at all, actually. there's a new study just out that says that people aren't really allergic to gluten. not allergic. not real. yeah, then white people say great now what are we going to complain about? [ laughter and applause ] i wish i could have that

cupcake. want to know why i can't? [ laughter ] no, we're fine, we're fine. we know, mary. you can't have gluten. [ laughter ] don't tease me. don't tease me. [ laughter ] no one's chasing you, mary. can't have gluten so -- [ laughter ] stop running after me. mary, no one's running -- [ laughter ] can't have gluten so -- [ laughter ] i'm a bummer, i don't know what to get on the menu. [ laughter ] no one's following you. i'm thinking of a number. it's not even a game. i'm not playing with you. you're close you're close. i'm a vegan. [ laughter ] it's five. i'll just tell you. number five. get this: health experts are now saying that sharing a bed with someone is actually healthier than sleeping alone.

that study was conducted by that one researcher, the last guy left in the bar. [ laughter ] it's true, it's true, actually. yeah. want another one? [ applause ] and finally, man, i'm so excited for this. honey boo boo -- [ laughter ] honey boo boo's entire family is going to be competing on family feud next week. this is for real! i cannot wait. what is it next tuesday? i cannot wait for this. but anyway they put out a clip of what we can expect. take a look. >> if you wanted to ruin a wedding, name something you might do to the cake. [ beep ] sugar bear. >> blow it up? [ laughter ] >> survey says: what the f? what? >> jimmy: we have a great show tonight! the roots right there. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: oh man, we have a great show tonight. [ cheers ]

a fun, fun show tonight. we love it when she stops by here to talk some politics and make a nice stiff cocktail. rachel maddow is back on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] we love her. makes a good cocktail, man. also i'm so excited to have her here. m.i.a. is here. [ cheers and applause ] i love m.i.a. i love m.i.a. i can't wait to talk to her. i never met her before. >> steve: really? >> jimmy: yeah. we jam out to m.i.a. >> steve: oh, 24/7, 362. [ humming "paper planes" together ] ♪ >> jimmy: she does it much better. [ laughter ] much better. >> steve: much better. >> jimmy: yeah, much better. m.i.a. is here tonight. come on! [ cheers and applause ] fun. hey guys, it's time for "late

night hashtags." here we go. ♪ ♪ hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag ♪ >> jimmy: you guys are on twitter, yes? correct? [ cheers ] twitter is fun. we use twitter on our show every single week. so if you watch our show you want to play along we do this thing every wednesday night where i send out a hashtag. we ask you guys to tweet on things based on that topic. okay, so since the new "thor" movie comes out tomorrow i went on twitter and started a hashtag called #mysuperpower. and i asked you guys to tweet out a funny or crazy superpower you wish you had. we got thousands of tweets. in fact, within a half hour it was a worldwide trending topic. thank you for those tweets. [ cheers and applause ] very nice of you. now i thought i'd share some of my favorite "my superpower" tweets from you guys. here we go. this first one is from @simmonsisold. he says, "i have the ability to eat salad and be as happy as every person i've ever seen eating a salad in a commercial." [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: he is old. >> jimmy: you got to come to the olive garden. we got some fresh new salad.

[ laughter ] people are laughing hysterically. i'm doubled over laughing eating a salad. [ laughter ] >> steve: eat some croutons. >> jimmy: don't chase me. no croutons for me. >> steve: mary can't eat croutons. >> jimmy: can't have gluten. mary can't have that one. >> steve: everyone stop. >> jimmy: i can't eat anything with acid in it. no tomatoes, just dry lettuce. >> steve: all right, well -- >> jimmy: that's all i can have. >> steve: thanks for having us for dinner. >> jimmy: no problem. >> steve: can you drink? >> jimmy: no. i can't even have any liquids near me. [ laughter ] >> steve: really, you're allergic to liquid? >> jimmy: yeah, i'm allergic to anything with moisture. >> steve: oh, mary. >> jimmy: terrible. i just have this terrible life. >> steve: oh, my gosh. no, no, mary, no. >> jimmy: okay, well what is this? gluten is not real? [ laughter ] next one from @mandyspells. she says, "i would be able to switch between being a guy and a girl so i could have free drinks when i want, but pee in a urinal, too." [ laughter and applause ] good idea, mandy. >> steve: way to win. >> jimmy: it's a win/win, man.

it's a win/win. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: a win/win. >> steve: she's european. >> jimmy: thank you. [ laughter ] this one's from @cesconavarro. he says, "i would have the power to shrink my hand so i could eat the last few pringles." [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, my goodness. >> jimmy: this one's from @davidcoggeshall, he says, "i would have the ability to give sudden boners to tv weathermen." [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: what really? >> jimmy: out of all the powers, that's he wants. >> steve: i have that power. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this one from @loveisabella8. she says, "i would have the power to stop letting anyone over the age of 30 to think it's okay to twerk in public places." >> steve: yes. >> jimmy: know your limits, people. know your limits. >> steve: no twerk zone. >> jimmy: this one's from @yaksohard. she says, "i would have laser pointer eyes so i could give

killer presentations and confuse cats everywhere." [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: @yaksohard. >> jimmy: this last one from @jackjasonjames2. he says, "i would be able to tell where someone is just by smelling them." where did you grow up? oh, kansas city. lovely town. [ laughter and applause ] there you have late night hashtags. to check out more of our favorites. go to latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/ hashtags. thank you, guys. [ applause ] hey guys, i don't know if you heard about this, but katy perry, our pal katy perry, she just passed justin bieber to become the most popular person on twitter with more than 46.7 million followers. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: that's a lot of people. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: and you know i was looking at some of her tweets. and i noticed that they were getting a crazy amount of retweets. like this one right here. tweeted "happy thursday everyone" over 8,000 retweets. and she did this last wednesday. >> steve: are you serious? >> jimmy: it wasn't even thursday. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: she doesn't care. she's very popular on twitter.

so we thought it would be fun to have one of our writers, who isn't as popular as katy perry. his name is arthur. [ laughter ] yeah, not even a popular name. [ laughter and applause ] his parents don't even follow him. yeah, i know. we wanted arthur to tweet out the exact same thing as katy perry throughout the week -- different tweets of hers. and see who gets more retweets, him or katy perry. let's bring him out and see how he did. arthur, come on out, buddy. [ applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hey my friend! >> how are ya? >> jimmy: all right. let's get down to business, arthur. what katy perry tweet did we go with this week? >> okay, well i was looking through her twitter accounts. i saw she tweeted #covergirlkaty. with a picture of her cover girl ad. >> jimmy: very pretty. >> so today i also tweeted #covergirlkaty with a photo of myself in the same cover girl ad. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: can we see that again? [ laughter ] congratulations, very nice photo. >> thank you. >> jimmy: now since we've been doing this on the show the past

couple of days you've actually been getting more retweets. >> yeah, and it's been a great experience for me because i usually get zero retweets. >> jimmy: good for you. well it sounds like you might have a chance this time. who knows, you might even get more retweets. so now, how many retweets for that tweet do you have? [ drumroll ] >> i have 161 retweets! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: that's fantastic! congratulations! >> thank you so much. >> jimmy: that's a lot of retweets. how many did katy perry get for the exact same tweet? >> she got 14,941. >> jimmy: very close. that is very close. very close, arthur, very close. now, you're not the cover girl supermodel spokesmodel but if you were what would you say? >> easy breezy beautiful cover girl. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: very nice, that's very good, arthur. thank you very much, arthur meyer tweeting the same thing as katy perry. we'll be back with rachel maddow everyone. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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exclusively at at&t. [ cheers and applause ] why is it better to get what you want now instead of later? 'cause you don't want to wait to eat your raisins. you don't want to wait to eat your raisins? no! why not? because they will turn into grapes. not sure that's the way it works. yes! are you competing for cutest kid right now? yes. and what place are you in? kindergarten! that's adorable. [ male announcer ] it's not complicated. now is better. and at&t is the nation's fastest and now most reliable 4g lte network. ♪

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest this evening is a best-selling author and also a host of "rachel maddow show" weeknights at 9:00 pm on msnbc. here to talk about this week's elections as well as her recent cameo on "the simpsons." here's our pal rachel maddow, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. we love it when you're here. >> i do, too. >> jimmy: thank for coming back. big week in politics but also a big week in general for you. you were on "the simpsons."

>> i know. i've had a lot of really great things happen in my life. i've had a great life. i have the best job in the world. but being drawn on "the simpsons?" i sort of feel like i quit. i'm done. this is it. >> jimmy: that's it. i'm out. >> nothing else happens. >> jimmy: what an honor. >> this is the pinnacle of my existence. >> jimmy: what does it feel like? >> i feel small and yellow and i have a little cup with a tea bag. it's just -- i mean, i think about the things that i want in life that i don't have. like i'd like to be able to fly with one of those little jet packs like we used to have. i used to imagine that we would have by this point. we used to have. you know what i mean. >> jimmy: no, i know what you meant. >> you know what i mean. >> jimmy: no, you always see in those -- the future is here. then it never existed. >> jetpack. maybe we'll get that someday. >> jimmy: dipping dots. [ light laughter ] >> i'd like to be able to catch fish really easily. i go fishing a lot. i'm really bad at it. like someday that might happen. that's it. i'm on "the simpsons" those are the only other things i want in life. for fish to leap at me when they see me and to be able to fly. >> jimmy: we could get one of the guys from the fishing channel to help you out. >> really?

>> jimmy: yeah. is there a fishing channel? >> do you know a flying channel? >> jimmy: of course. yeah, yeah, yeah. we got a jet pack channel. it's all on comcast. it's in the family. [ light laughter ] comes with the cable package, like it or not. what's the flying channel? but did they just call you and say would you do a voice on it? >> yeah. i thought they were kidding at first. or i thought it was going to be like a pantheon of people you've really not heard of from cable. >> jimmy: no. >> but it's really me. >> jimmy: people know you, of course. what is the back story of you on "the simpsons?" >> the back story is my media career started in springfield with kent bachman. kent an i used to have a show together. and i -- when i got hired to go to cable news i asked kent to come with me. he was like "no, no, i think i'll stay in springfield." and so i come back to visit springfield and he's very bitter. [ light laughter ] very, very bitter. >> jimmy: i love -- we actually have a clip. rachel maddow being very funny in a recent episode of "the simpsons." check it out. >> hello, kent. >> well, well, well rachel maddow. everyone came back for chip's funeral. >> i was flying from d.c. to new york, and of course, i had the layover in springfield.

how's the gang at channel 6? >> look, let's get this out of the way. just because we both worked at channel 6 and you made it big and i didn't doesn't mean i'm bitter. >> is that your car? >> maybe. >> kent i'm going to tell you the most important mistake you ever made after this break. so kent, that mistake you made, that fundamental, life-changing error, that cosmic fail that -- >> just tell me already. >> after this break. [ light laughter ] you could have come with me but you were suckling the duel teats of infotainment and celebrifawning. ♪ so, tell me about your new movie. >> it's fantastic. the studio let us play in the sandbox. >> great, we have a clip. >> no. no, don't show it. there aren't five good seconds in the whole film. [ tires screeching ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's amazing. pal, i'm so proud of you. >> i love it. >> jimmy: that's a big move. >> they even have like me and the jacket and the little shirt i always wear at the same time. >> jimmy: come on. they're very smart over there. i love them. let's talk about some politics

stuff. actually a big deal happened today, big civil rights thing. >> yes. sort of -- i guess we sort of maybe thought it might be coming, but it was still a surprise when it finally happened. it's a big gay civil rights bill that passed the senate. it first got introduced 40 years ago and it finally passed today. basically a law that says you can't be fired for being gay. which is not the law in 29 states. >> jimmy: how is that possible? >> in 29 states if your boss thinks you're gay or finds out that you are gay you could be fired for that and it's totally legal. >> jimmy: really? >> so, it passed the senate today. >> jimmy: was it passed by vladimir putin or something? [ laughter ] >> exactly. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah, and so, it's weird. it's one of these things where people think it's already illegal to discriminate that way. >> jimmy: of course. >> and in 21 states it is. but in 29 states it's not. what passed in the senate today would make that national law. already you can't fire somebody because of their race, or their gender, or their age, and this would just add sexual orientation and sexual identity to that. >> jimmy: good. well, i'm glad. that's amazing. [ cheers and applause ] good stuff. >> it is good.

it's passed the senate. and one thing that was nice about it is that it was totally bipartisan. 10 republicans joined in. but the republicans control the house. in the house the republicans say they will not even allow it to be voted on. if they did put it up for a vote it would pass, i think. but they won't even allow it to be voted on. which is hard to believe in 2013. >> jimmy: that's why i stick to my show. because i can't wrap my head around how people make these decisions. it's just crazy. >> the weird thing is that they're trying to say one of reasons they don't want to vote on it is because it's already the law? which it's not already the law. [ light laughter ] wait, no, no. you guys need a different strategy. people can look that up. but they don't mind. >> jimmy: they don't mind, no. but the republicans had a pretty good weekend. we have a new jersey governor christie. >> yes. they re-elected chris christie. >> jimmy: love chris christie. [ applause ] they got chris christie. >> he won by like 22 points. >> jimmy: that's crazy, right? >> he wanted to win by a huge margin. he got a really big margin. the thing that's going to happen in new jersey now, and

chris christie will talk to you, so you should ask him about this. he's pretty clearly going to run for president. how is he going to act towards new jersey while he's doing that? because like when mitt romney was governor of massachusetts, i live in massachusetts. and when he was running for president he just spent his whole time as our governor traveling around the country talking to republican audiences about how much massachusetts sucks. terrible. what an awful place. >> jimmy: he's in iowa campaigning. >> he'll be like, "don't you feel sorry for me? i'm from terrible democratic massachusetts?" very insulting. >> jimmy: do you believe him when he says he won't even be around? >> if he's going to be running for president in 2016 he pretty much has to start spending all his week ends in iowa. and then week pretty soon it will be his weekdays in iowa, too. an new hampshire and all the rest -- >> jimmy: start campaigning. it starts now. >> it starts really, really soon. and so -- >> jimmy: you think he's gonna be the front runner clearly, right? >> well -- >> jimmy: for the republican party? you don't think? >> it's hard to know. i mean, the republicans when they talk amongst themselves, sometimes they let me listen. >> jimmy: aha. >> when they talk amongst themselves they tell themselves that they made a mistake in

nominating a relatively centrist guy in john mccain who lost and a relatively centrist guy sort of in mitt romney who lost. in republicanville the reason they lost the last two presidential elections is because they didn't pick somebody hardcore enough. they didn't pick somebody who was conservative enough. so they think -- republicans are telling each other the story that chris christie would be making the same mistake they made in the previous two elections. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> i think it's amaze-balls that that's how they think about it. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i love the amaze-balls. it's a great word. >> definitely pick the craziest guy you can find. that's your ticket for success. >> jimmy: i think if they do it right that i think that's the only move that i can see as just an outsider. i'm not following anything. >> who knows who the democrats are going to pick, though? it's very hard -- >> jimmy: i know, right? >> everybody thinks it's going to be hillary clinton. if it's not anything could happen in that matchup. >> jimmy: it's so interesting. >> republicans are so mean to chris christie. like the real conservatives, they really, really hate him. >> jimmy: they don't like him? >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's so odd.

who do we have now? deblasio is our mayor. >> yeah. >> jimmy: he's great. but it was bloomberg forever. and he's republican. >> and an independent and -- >> jimmy: kind of, right? >> bloombergian. >> jimmy: is that a party? bloombergian? >> in his house. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: he was a democrat, right? bloomberg? >> by the time he was running for mayor he wasn't anymore. he became a republican in order to run and stopped being a republican and he was an independent. it's weird. the rest of the country thinks of new york as this icon of liberalism. but there hasn't been a democratic mayor of new york in 20 years. deblasio will be the first guy since '93 that's a democrat. >> jimmy: i like the guy. i think he's cool. here he is. here's his family. >> this is what america -- when america imagines new york city's as mayor and his family, finally we are living up to it. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: that's what a family in new york is. >> yeah. it's been a republican billionaire forever but now we've got a liberal democrat and his awesome interracial family. >> jimmy: i love -- i was like --

i called questlove. i'm like, "this guy's totally stealing your look, dude." [ laughter ] i mean, i was so -- i was like, come on. doesn't have a pick. yeah, exactly. every time we have you on the show i have to ask you always to make me a cocktail because i don't know -- you're the best ever. >> you're a good little drinker. don't feel bad. >> jimmy: thank you. [ laughter ] thank you. i'll take that. rachel maddow is going to teach us how to make a perfect cocktail after the break. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ man ] welcome to the camry thrill ride! [ tires screech ] [ laughter ] [ screaming ] [ laughter ] [ screaming ] [ woman ] we're going backwards. [ screaming ] [ tires screech ] [ tires screech, screaming ] [ laughter ] [ man ] more power than any hybrid in its class. i'm really impressed! can we get back in line? [ man ] toyota camry hybrid. let's go places.

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is this flu shot necessary? it keeps you healthy during flu season. but does it hurt? nah. plus you get a really sweet bandaid! anything else i should know? here's a thought, try scoring more points on the other team. okay. even a warrior can get sick. kaiser permanente reminds you to get your flu shot this season. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back to "late night" everybody. i'm here with rachel maddow

right here. she's hosts "the rachel maddow show" weeknights at 9:00 p.m. on msnbc. we love the show. we love when you come on. you're going to make me a martini it looks like? >> we have made a lot of drinks together. but i feel like the martini is sort of the king of all cocktails. and you're kind of like the man now? you're kind of the boss? >> jimmy: hey. that's very, very nice. [ cheers and applause ] i don't know why but i like it. >> you are -- you're like becoming -- you've always been jimmy fallon. now you're like mr. jimmy fallon. >> jimmy: hey, all right, huh? [ cheers and applause ] that's right. don't you forget it! [ light laughter ] dad! [ laughter ] >> i feel like you need to be able to drink dad drinks. >> jimmy: yes, a dad drink. >> you need to be able to walk into steakhouses in mid-town and have them be like, "mr. fallon is here. quick get a special glass." >> jimmy: yes, exactly. they do that. >> that's a martini. >> jimmy: they do that absolutely. a martini, all right, here we go. >> we went through a bad history in america that any drink that came in a glass with a stem was called a martini? >> jimmy: i remember that. yeah, yeah, yeah. it's done now, right? i made a martini once it was in

the 90s, i was in college. it was like swing music was coming back? do you remember that? if you were doing swing music cocktails like "i'm cool, man." i was wearing like bowling shirts? i thought i knew how to make a martini. put equal parts of vermouth and gin in the same cup. and i made my roommate drink it with me. neither one of us wanted to say that because we thought we were sophisticated. we were like -- [ light laughter ] it tasted like pine needles. it was awful. what's the secret? >> the secret is, if there's vodka in it it's not a martini. a martini is made with gin. you do actually put in more vermouth than you think you would. this is two and a quarter ounces of gin to the quarters of an ounce of vermouth. and you want the vermouth that's called french vermouth. it's the white kind, not the red kind. >> jimmy: aha. >> here's the thing, though. everybody always drinks like old vermouth that they inherited from their grandmother that's been sitting in the back of the liquor cabinet. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. you always find the -- >> what is that for? it goes bad in like two weeks. >> jimmy: does it really? >> yes. you need a get a little bottle of vermouth, open it up, put it in the freezer. was it like a dusty old bottle?

>> jimmy: it tasted like salad dressing. it was great. maybe it was. [ laughter ] >> it skunks. it goes bad. any way, 2 1/4 ounces, 3/4 ounces of fresh vermouth that you just bought that day. and now a little bit of orange bitters. >> jimmy: see, there we go. that's why you're awesome. orange bitters. >> orange bitters. >> jimmy: what is orange bitters? i love it. >> it's just orange bitters. if you find the other kind of bitters don't put it in your martini. >> jimmy: look at how bitter that man is. [ laughter ] i hate it! i hate this drink! [ laughter ] he plays for the red sox, by the way. [ laughter ] >> he's an excellent pitcher. >> jimmy: yeah, he really is. >> what you want to do you want to not jostle the ice that much. smooth, jimmy. see how quiet? ♪ >> jimmy: it makes no sound. >> all you hear is the roots. all you hear is the roots. >> jimmy: if a martini falls in the woods does it make a sound? [ laughter ] >> now will you make me a lemon twist? >> jimmy: yes i will make you a lemon twist. >> do you remember how to do that? >> jimmy: oh, do i? >> you can do it. like a little thin swath of lemon peel without too much white on the back of it.

you can do it. >> jimmy: i'm breaking a sweat here. is that all right? >> yeah, that's good. that's good. >> jimmy: not too shabby? >> not too shabby. >> jimmy: what's going down? >> drinking problem. >> jimmy: big party foul. did i do it right? >> kind of. you want to make a go a little oil on the top there. >> jimmy: oh, wait. like that? did it happen? >> yes. >> jimmy: am i not doing something? i'm doing origami with it. i don't know what i'm making it into. [ laughter ] >> you're the boss. >> jimmy: you're the boss. yeah, exactly. rachel says i'm the boss. all right, here we go. >> that's how we like this twist. just go like this. >> jimmy: mangle it. absolutely. >> here you go. >> jimmy: all right, here we go. >> mr. fallon, your martini, sir. see if this is better than your last experience. >> jimmy: that is one of best things i've ever tasted in my life. >> see? a cool clear solid. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're a cool guest right there. rachel maddow. catch her weeknights at 9:00 p.m. on msnbc. we'll speak to m.i.a. after the break! come on back everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪

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oscar and grammy-nominated artist who's fourth album "matangi" is in stores right now. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome m.i.a.! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thanks for being on the show. >> thanks for having me. >> jimmy: i'm a giant fan of yours. you actually have a song called "jimmy" which was written about me. >> yes. >> jimmy: yes. absolutely. i just want to put you, next to you. >> i wanted to find you. i kept saying "jimmy." >> jimmy: then you found me. i heard you met the roots before and it did not go well. what happened? >> it's actually it's quite embarrassing looking at them right now. [ laughter ] >> questlove: we'll turn around. >> jimmy: yeah. all the roots turn around. [ applause ]

>> you turn around. >> jimmy: just tell us what happened. [ laughter ] >> well, can i have some water first? >> jimmy: you can have that, yeah. i was in japan, so you have to like understand japan. >> jimmy: yes. okay. >> they don't understand what i say in my songs. they are purely based on cool. >> jimmy: yeah. >> it's just like the beat and they like the fashion and how cool you are. and so i walked into this really cool club in japan and was trying to be really cool. and i saw them. >> jimmy: the roots were there. they're in the club? [ laughter ] >> yeah. and they we're like, basically, sat in the line at the back and i was trying to make my way over there. >> jimmy: being cool. yeah. >> yeah. but it was like i felt like i was dmx in the intro of "belly." >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. [ talking over each other ] in slow motion. >> yeah it was me being, like, i

was slow motioning. and tripped on the glass floor? >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] [ talking over each other ] >> japanese fans -- >> jimmy: cool japanese club and they just had a glass floor in the middle of the club. >> yeah. >> questlove: that was the coolest club of all time. [ laughter ] >> you fell down? oh, no. >> i did, yeah. >> questlove: it was too pristine. like the glass -- >> it's was like slow motion. >> jimmy: you slow motion fall down? >> yeah. >> jimmy: we used to do a thing when i was in high school i would pretend to hit my head on the glass, on the glass door? we had like one mall by our house. and my friend would go ahead of me and we would act like we didn't know each other. and he would open the door and i would hit it with my foot or hand and pretend i hit it with my head. then we'd have a crowd around me. are you okay? you okay? i know, i needed friends. [ laughter ] i just -- need attention.

>> that happened for real. >> jimmy: yeah, but that happened for real for you? but, i was thinking about this one thing that reminds me of -- i had a crush on this girl at college. i was going to surprise her. i was going to meet her outside of class. i think i had like a flower or something. i was trying to be cool and waiting for her to come outside of the class and she came out and she slipped on ice. and her books went everywhere. and i went -- either i help her or pretend i didn't see it. [ laughter ] so i just pretended i didn't see it and i walked away. [ laughter ] i never brought it up. i never brought it up. i thought it would be too much to deal with. it was too embarrassing. so i didn't do it. >> yeah. >> jimmy: congrats for the new record here. "matangi." am i saying it right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: i downloaded it this morning on apple -- on itunes. what is matangi? >> i downloaded it as well. interscope told me download it. and i was like what? my own? >> jimmy: you can't get your own album free? hello. >> yeah, but i haven't got around to it. >> jimmy: but i love it. look at the cover. you always do cool fun stuff. i think -- when was the first time i heard of you? was it galang galang? is that -- that's the name, right? i remember seeing that video and call my friend and i'm like, dude i don't know how i missed

this girl but it's the best song ever. and i thought you were from the 80s or something. i thought i missed you. i think i missed -- i don't know how i missed this girl, she is awesome. [ laughter ] and like shazam didn't exist. so i couldn't shazam you. i don't know how to describe her but she's so good. and the song goes "galang galang galang galang." like dude, that's m.i.a. i'm sorry, i'm such an old man. you're going to be playing with the roots tonight, yes? >> yes, i am. >> jimmy: your old buddy the roots. you're going to get together. [ cheers and applause ] >> things coming full circle. >> jimmy: now your back will be facing them. because you'll be in front of the band. and you don't play with a band normally, yeah? >> no. it's the first time in the u.s. anyway. i did do jules holland once for the specials. >> jimmy: oh, fun. this is it. this is history right here. that's what i'm saying. m.i.a. performs after the break. come on back. "matangi!" [ cheers and applause ] ♪ go!

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest just released her new album "matangi" and she's here tonight to perform a song from it called "come walk with me" with a little help from the roots. once again, m.i.a.!

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ there's a thousand ways to meet you now ♪ ♪ there's a thousand ways to track you down ♪ ♪ whatever you said and done there's a thousand ways to make it count ♪ ♪ there is nothing that can touch me now ♪ ♪ you can't even break me down every time you think of some ♪ ♪ it's all ready been did and done ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ there's a thousand ways to meet you now ♪ ♪ there's a thousand ways to track you down ♪ ♪ whatever you said and done there's a thousand ways to make it count ♪ ♪ there is nothing that can touch me now ♪ ♪ you can't even break me down every time you think of some ♪ ♪ it's all ready been did and done ♪ ♪ can i be your best friend can i make it to the end can you give me some of what you went and gave them come walk with me ♪ ♪ you ain't gotta shake it just be with me you ain't gotta throw your hands in the air ♪ ♪ cause tonight we ain't acting like we don't care ♪ ♪

♪ when you feel like what that feels like when someone makes you feel all right ♪ ♪ we can take the same car tonight for the ride i got plenty of time ♪ ♪ what doesn't kill us makes us stronger that's why my words get longer and longer ♪ ♪ my tracks are less traveled than uganda when we touch base just to discuss agenda ♪ ♪ can i be your best friend can i make it to the end can you give me some of ♪ ♪ what you went and gave them come walk with me ♪ ♪ you ain't gotta shake it just be with me you ain't gotta throw your hands in the air ♪ ♪ cause tonight we ain't acting like we don't care ♪

♪ it's cool it takes two so i'm gonna still [bleep] with you ♪ ♪ it's cool it takes two so i'm gonna still [bleep] with you ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yes! that's the way to do it, pal. thank you so much. m.i.a., the roots! "matangi" is in stores right now. we'll be right back, everybody. that sounded great, man. [ cheers and applause ]

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to rachel maddow, m.i.a. and the greatest band in late night. the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen. stay tuned for carson daly. thank you for watching. have a great night. i hope to see you tomorrow, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪