tv Late Night With Jimmy Fallon NBC January 24, 2014 12:36am-1:37am PST
>> jimmy: welcome! welcome, everybody. oh, thank you very much! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] thank you guys, so much! welcome! welcome, everybody to "late night with jimmy fallon." hot crowd. hot crowd tonight. [ cheers and applause ] there is no polar vortex in this studio tonight. we are hot! welcome, everybody. thank you for being here. i appreciate it. let's get to some news here. before all the screaming stops. [ laughter ] justin bieber, everyone. [ audience aws ] poor guy. i don't know. he's in some trouble, man. he was arrested today in miami for drag racing and drunk driving in a rented lamborghini. which is pretty surprising when you hear that the only race car he had been in before that was his bed. [ laughter and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] mom, can i stay up to watch "late night"? no, go to your lamborghini. that's right, bieber was arrested for drunk driving in a lamborghini. he's facing a pretty stiff
penalty. they're saying he can get up to two years of being his own neighbor. which is just awful. it is awful. [ laughter and applause ] you don't want that. that's serious stuff. of course, miami police have already released bieber's mug shot. take a look at this. yeah. [ laughter ] i don't know if i'm looking at a mug shot or a proactive commercial. i don't know what that is. i've seen that before. [ cheers and applause ] he's so excited to be arrested, he's like -- [ laughter ] of course, we're all getting excited about the super bowl coming up. oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause ] it's gonna be good. we have the denver broncos taking on the seattle seahawks. two teams from states where marijuana is now legal. [ cheers and applause ] which is why they're now call the super bowl the stoner vortex. [ laughter ] and, of course, the fact that weed is legal has affected some
of the plays the teams will be using in the big game. did you know that? yeah, i'll show you what i mean. it's time for "inside the playbook: stoner vortex edition." ♪ inside the playbook stoner vortex edition ♪ >> jimmy: all right. take a look at some of these plays. first is the "protect the hot pocket." [ laughter ] you want to make sure that's protected. then, there's the "i'm so blitzed." [ laughter ] next there's the "zoned-out defense." yeah. then, there's the "accidentally take ourselves out." [ laughter ] and finally, there's the "quarterback snack." [ cheers and applause ] hey, dude, it's 4 and 20. >> steve: throw it in! >> jimmy: stop laughing. we're at the super bowl! i had a super bowl. [ light laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
thank you. yeah, yeah. he might as well just retire. after being that -- take care of this. there you go. ♪ all right, buddy. great knowing him. great knowing him. [ light laughter ] the winter olympics are also coming up soon. and norway's men's curling team -- curb your enthusiasm. their curling team is making news after they revealed the outfits they plan to wear this year. it's pretty insane. look at these outfits. [ audience ohs ] leave it to the curling team to be the only sport where the uniforms are louder than the crowd. [ laughter and applause ] for curling. i love it. can we see those guys again? [ light laughter ] i think that pattern is one of those magic eye things. can we zoom in on that? yeah. hey, wait a minute. i know what that is. that's that -- >> oh! oh!
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's it. [ applause ] ♪ that's your solo record! that's james' solo album. i knew i knew what that was. >> steve: big in norway. >> jimmy: yeah, he's an angel, man. yeah. he plays like an angel. [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: plays like an angel. [ light laughter ] you guys, some big tv news. cbs has announced that the next season of "survivor" will have contestants divided into groups based on how strong, smart and pretty they are. yep, it will take place in this exotic location known as high school. [ laughter and applause ] very interesting, yeah. this is the craziest story. i heard that a porn version of the pbs show "downton abbey" is in the works. [ light laughter ] i would describe it to you but it would just sound like a game of clue. [ light laughter ] the butler did it -- in the library -- with the lead pipe. [ laughter and applause ] that's correct. >> steve: colonel mustard?
>> jimmy: i saw that pope francis recently invited 16 rabbis to have lunch with him at the vatican. then they got a minister, walked into a bar, and blew everybody's mind. [ laughter ] a pope, a minister and 16 rabbis walk into a bar. >> steve: i think the rabbi said, "you get the check. we'll get the tips." [ audience oohs ] oh, come on! [ laughter ] seriously! >> jimmy: you should have retired earlier. >> steve: i should have retired. >> jimmy: i get it, tips. >> steve: yeah, because of the moils and -- yeah, circumcision. [ laughter ] >> they made a pact -- abraham made a pact with god. >> jimmy: it's a classic circumcision joke. [ laughter ] >> steve: don't rub it too hard, turns into a suitcase. >> jimmy: anyway! [ laughter and applause ] ♪ >> steve: this will all be cut out. enjoy it now. [ laughter ] tell your friends about it later. >> jimmy: we'll cut all this. >> steve: they'll cut it all. >> jimmy: they're going to cut all of this. there will be no monologue at all. >> steve: no. none. >> jimmy: throw it in the garbage. >> steve: throw it in the garbage. throw it away! throw it in the trash. >> jimmy: throw it in the dust bin. >> steve: just rip it down.
[ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. here's some local news. new york mayor bill de blasio is facing criticism after this latest snowstorm because wealthy neighborhoods got their streets plowed after poor neighborhoods. yeah. rich people called in to complain. they were like, "this is outrageous, and if i weren't in bermuda right now, i would come down there." [ laughter and applause ] two olives -- two olives in that martini. anyway. [ laughter ] let's go to the other yacht. this is a pretty big deal. there's talk now that a-rod's performance enhancing drug scandal is being turned into a movie. they're keeping most of the details under wraps, but they have released some potential titles. [ light laughter ] yeah. >> steve: oh, my gosh are you serious? >> jimmy: this is how they do movies.
put the title out first, see if it sticks. >> steve: see if it floats. >> jimmy: yeah, and then you write and produce and direct the movie. >> steve: yeah, it's great. [ laughter ] let's see them. >> jimmy: let's see some of the titles. first there's "needle juice." [ audience oohs ] then there is "the lyin' king." and finally, there's "cloudy with a chance of small balls." they sound good. i don't know which one they'll go with. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: the squeakquel. >> jimmy: this kind of bummed me out. it was just announced that toni tennille and daryl dragon from "captain and tennille" are getting a divorce after 39 years of marriage. [ audience aws ] yep, fans were surprised. they were like, what kind of name is daryl dragon? i mean, that's the captain's real name? [ laughter ] that's a great name. why didn't they just go with "dragon and tennille"? [ laughter ] daryl dragon, sounds like the name of that dude that would be in that porn -- the "downton abbey" porn. [ laughter ] speaking of music, the new season of "american idol" is underway. and they're working -- [ scattered cheers ] yeah, it's a great show. we love it. they're working really hard to
do different things to make it interesting for the viewers. so they started showing trivia questions. and they're really not that hard. look at this. >> and now for a little test of your "idol" knowledge. which detroit-based film did "idol" alum jennifer hudson win an oscar for in 2007? was it either "dreamgirls" or "8 mile"? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you could have never heard of jennifer hudson, "american idol" or ever watched a movie before and still got that question right. that is not trivia. [ applause ] is jennifer hudson a cartoon or is she real? [ laughter ] and finally, this is just weird. google is getting a lot of attention over a new google glass app that let's users watch themselves have sex from their partner's point of view. [ audience ohs ] you can actually see yourself while you're having sex. in related news, i think i know what to get kim and kanye for their wedding. [ laughter and applause ] we have a great show tonight! give it up for the roots, everybody!
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have a fun show tonight. this guy is on a crazy roll right now. he's up for an oscar for "wolf of wall street." he's also hosting "saturday night live" this weekend. jonah hill is back on our program! [ cheers and applause ] talented dude. >> steve: talented young man. >> jimmy: plus, we are honored to have him here. talk show legend, dick cavett is dropping by! [ cheers and applause ] he's got a new book out. and he's one of the coolest and most innovative chefs out there. we are cooking with chef wylie dufresne tonight. [ cheers and applause ] he's a cool guy. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: years ago -- i think it was my first season on "saturday night live" -- "new york magazine" was giving out "new york magazine" awards. they did it for like two years, so i got one for upcoming
comedian or something like that. and i really took it seriously. my parents came, and i had a speech ready. and i was teary. like, i remember one of the writers at "snl" was like, "man, you're really into that award. you're really touched by that." and i was like i really -- i still have it on a shelf in my house. but that same year, wylie dufresne won for best new chef. and he brought his mom too. [ audience aws ] so we've been friends ever since. so i want to say hi to wylie's mom if she's watching tonight. hey, how you doing, mom? [ cheers and applause ] look at your sons! we're both on tv. >> steve: both on tv tonight. >> jimmy: yeah. guys, it's time for "late night" hashtags. here we go. ♪ hashtags, hashtags hashtags, hashtags hashtags ♪ >> jimmy: you guys are on twitter, right? [ cheers and applause ] it's fun. well, we use twitter every single week. so if you want to watch the show and play along, we do this thing every wednesday where i send out a hashtag and we ask you guys to tweet out based on that topic. so because it's been so cold throughout the country, i went
on twitter and started hashtag called polar vortex songs. and i asked you guys to tweet out a popular song title, and change it so that it's polar vortex themed. we got thousands of tweets. in fact, within a half hour, it was a worldwide trending topic. so thank you for those tweets. worldwide! [ cheers and applause ] now, i thought i would share some of my favorite polar vortex songs tweets from you guys. here we go. first one's from @mcpattyshack. [ laughter ] >> steve: mcpattyshack? >> jimmy: well, that name is taken. so -- [ laughter ] his song is "brrr'ed lines." [ light laughter ] that's pretty good. i like that. ♪ everybody get warm. everybody get warm. this one from @dobionekenobi. her song is "we are never ever ever getting warmer weather." [ laughter ] like never. >> steve: ever.
>> jimmy: this one is from @debbieme. her song is "you've lost that lovin' feeling in your extremities." [ light laughter ] this one is from @crosshillpartners. his song is -- ♪ i would do anything for gloves but i won't do that ♪ >> steve: what wouldn't he do? >> jimmy: what were they asking him to do? yeah. [ applause ] this was a good one. this is from @readilyconfused. her song is "nips don't lie." [ laughter ] take her word for it. it's cold out. [ laughter ] this one from @midmerch. his song is "all my exes live in polar vor-texas." [ laughter ] i would listen to that song. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: this one is from @alyssalstone. her song is "snow diggity." that's pretty good. ♪ i like the way you work it snow diggity ♪ ♪ her song is "it's still effin'
cold to me" by chilly joel. [ laughter ] bonus points for that one. ♪ what's the matter with the thermostat ♪ >> steve: oh, i was thinking -- ♪ it's still effin' cold to me ♪ "she's always a woman to me," that's what i thought. >> questlove: oh, yeah. >> steve: that's what i thought. i was wrong then. ♪ she's still effin' cold to me ♪ i think they probably meant "still effin' cold to me."e >> jimmy: "still rock n roll to me." yeah. it's duet with meltin' john. [ laughter ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> ladies and gentlemen -- james t. fallon! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i introduced myself and came out as my own guest. >> steve: yeah, that's great. you came out as your own guest. >> jimmy: never been done on a
talk show. >> steve: yeah, we'll do a split screen later, and then you'll see you introducing you. we'll split it up later. >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] >> steve: oh, it's friday. >> jimmy: it really is not. >> steve: thursday. [ laughter ] >> this one is from @bert88. his song is -- ♪ wake me up before you snow blow ♪ >> steve: wham. >> jimmy: last one from @livinjusttoday. her song is "enter snowman" by metallica. there you have it. [ cheers and applause ] those are tonight's "late night" hashtags. to check out more of our favorites, go to latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/ hashtags. we'll be right back with jonah hill, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ vo: once upon a time there was a boy who traveled to a faraway place
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guests this evening received his second academy award nomination for his performance opposite leonardo dicaprio in martin scorsese's the "wolf of wall street," which is currently in theatres. also this weekend hosting "saturday night live" for the third time with musical guest, bastille. plus welcome back to the show, a talented man. here is jonah hill! [ cheers and applause ]
♪ >> jimmy: thank you for coming back to see us. >> thank you for having me. congratulations on all of the excitement that's going on with all of you guys. >> jimmy: yeah. but you too. >> well, yeah. >> jimmy: let's talk about you. >> yeah. forget me -- you're about to be the host of the "tonight show" man. >> jimmy: that's really cool, yeah. i'm excited. we're all buzzin'. >> give it up for this guy! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's about you. >> you've got to show -- >> jimmy: i mean, it's unbelievable. it's crazy we're doing this. but, the second nomination for an oscar, academy award. congratulations. [ cheers and applause ] well deserved. >> it's truly insane and bizarre, yeah. >> jimmy: everyone likes you. you're great in these roles. >> what did they say specifically? >> jimmy: specifically -- >> let's be specific about what every person --
>> jimmy: i can't go through the whole thing. we do love you. >> paraphrase then? >> jimmy: they said you smell nice. >> i'm kidding. i don't care. >> jimmy: they notice. they notice. axe affect. >> it's crazy. i just -- even to be in the martin scorsese film, to meet him, even to breathe the same air as him, let alone to be in one opposite leo and then to get these award nominations and stuff. it's incredible. >> jimmy: were you acting your whole life? >> acting like an idiot mostly. >> jimmy: but, you went to school for it? >> i went to school in new york city, at new school. and i studied theater out here, started when i was 17, 18-years-old. >> jimmy: i heard that -- i read somewhere you used to go to this bar, black and white, and do plays there? >> yeah. and guess who i used to see there. >> jimmy: who? >> a guy you might know called james fallon. >> jimmy: did you see me there? >> yeah. yes i did. you wouldn't be there when i was performing. they would have open mic nights and i would perform plays there that i had written. but, i would go on my off nights and there would be like cool -- you were like the young, hot, superstar on snl. and you rolled in with like all
these cool people. and my friends are like, oh, that's jimmy fallon and stuff. and you were cool. you were super cool. >> jimmy: let's stop right there. >> you didn't spend your whole night talking with me, but, you know? >> jimmy: let's just stop right there, yeah. >> you were super gracious and cool and we were 17 or 18. we were that psyched to see you there. >> jimmy: no way. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's wild. what were your plays about? >> they were horrible. they were like trying to be alternative for the sake of it, basically. because it was basically stuff we put up in bars because we couldn't put them at new school because they were too -- >> jimmy: too weird? >> i had one where i had grown up in neverland ranch. that was the theme of one of the plays. [ laughter ] and i was the grounds keeper son and had seen all this stuff. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> and they were weird. they were super weird. i had one about hitler's college roommate. [ laughter and applause ] and they were kind of i guess they would probably more -- i tried to go for emotional depth in them. but they were basically, big dumb sketch ideas, tried to do as one-act plays. >> jimmy: you were never in an
improv group, were you? >> no, i auditioned and got groundlings and i got paired up with this guy who was doing all sorts of schtick and i didn't get in. >> jimmy: you didn't? >> yeah, i was 18 and tried out. and i didn't get in. but, i love -- i used to go to ucb and watch people perform. i more came up through movies than comedy. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: and you used to do prank phone calls? >> yeah, i still do, actually. [ laughter and applause ] well, they're not -- >> jimmy: i'm awful at them. >> i would do them when i was young and now i don't do them to be funny. when i was young, i would do them to make people laugh, to have ideas and have improvisational sketches on the phone. but, now since people recognize me and i'm working on a character especially one as extreme as donnie azoff in "wolf of wall street" if i go somewhere with the accent on the voice, i can't go there and physically try it out on people 'cause some people will recognize me and i'll look ridiculous, you know? >> jimmy: yeah. >> they'll just call me out right away. >> jimmy: like a prank phone call in person. >> yeah, i can't walk into a starbucks as donny and be, "hey, how ya doing." [ laughter ]
so, i would call on the phone and have these big giant fake teeth in the film. >> jimmy: oh, my god -- this is you from "wolf of wall street." i mean, look at this look. fantastic. and you had fake veneers. >> yeah, fake teeth. yeah, and i had a lisp when i put them in so i had to get rid of the lisp, and work on the accent and everything. and no one from my life would speak to me on the phone. but tim monich our acting and dialect coach said you've got to talk with these in your mouth for an hour and a half every day so i didn't know what to do, so i would call target and best buy as donnie and i would just start asking about different appliances and talk on the phone. and i used to call this one best buy in honolulu in hawaii. and they were super friendly and would stay on the phone with me for like three hours. [ laughter and applause ] now that i got nominated for an oscar to play donnie, i've got to give a shout out to all of the best buy employees. >> jimmy: there you go. thank you best buy! [ cheers and applause ] more with jonah hill after the break. come on back, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, we are back with jonah hill, everybody. jonah -- [ cheers and applause ] jonah hill is up for another academy award for his performance in the "wolf of wall street" and he is hosting "saturday night live" for the third time this weekend with musical guest bastille. that's very, very fun. >> yeah. >> jimmy: "wolf of wall street" so fun to watch and this guy is a real guy you are playing right? >> he's an amalgamation. but you know, there are these guys who exist in the world, and that's kind of like what the movie is trying to point out. that these people still do exist, and did exist.
>> jimmy: and he's a real creep, this guy. >> yeah, he's a scum bag. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: how was it like playing him? you got like in character -- was it hard to get out of character? >> i played characters who i thought had lots of flaws, obviously, in other films. but, at the end of the day, i'm like, oh, they're a good person, you know. and this is the only time where i was like, oh, i don't think this is a good person, you know. [ laughter ] and i would get on the way home and do all this stuff, the way they treated women, drugs, stealing money from people. and you would be in it and scorsese is there and you're all excited and amped up. and you are so involved in the work. and on the drive home back to the city every night a wave of guilt would wash over me, over what i had done that day. >> jimmy: even though it's fake. >> yeah, because you're acting. but this is this scene where i fire this kid. i humiliate him, eat his fish, throw a lit cigarette in his face. and the actor was great, but he looked like he was going to cry. and there were 200 people screaming and humiliating him. and i took him to lunch afterwards and i'm like, look, that's not me, man. [ laughter ]
i know you know the drill. but i feel horrible. >> jimmy: and then you ate his fish in real life. >> i threw him down a stairwell and took his money -- >> jimmy: you got to take his money. >> great coffee. >> jimmy: rob reiner. >> rob reiner is the greatest. >> jimmy: he was hilarious. i thought he was so good. >> he's so fantastic and he's so -- you know, rob reiner as a filmmaker has the most eclectic filmography ever. you know he's done everything from "stand by me," to "princess bride" to "spinal tap" to "you can't handle the truth." >> marty dibergi. "a few good men." >> yeah, "a few good men, "misery." like he's done so many different kinds of films. so, many iconic films. and he's kinda like a guy you just would want to have around you all of the time. you know? because he just felt like a relative that a wiser, older relative. he has this warmth to him. >> jimmy: yeah, i met him once and he was super nice to me. i got that vibe from him. >> honestly, this is not a funny story. this is a hard-core story. the day that sandy hook -- the tragedy happened in sandy hook, we were shooting.
and i remember leo knocked on my trailer and told me what happened. and we were standing outside the trailer neither of us could talk and a van pulled up and rob reiner got out of the van and we both instinctually looked to rob reiner and rob started talking and being helpful and healing about what was going on. and just him talking, he took the baton and like knew we were all looking to him. >> jimmy: to break the ice. >> and comforted us. it was a beautiful moment that i just have a lot of love for that guy. >> jimmy: i like hearing that. [ cheers and applause ] really cool. you got to meet -- you got to meet joe pesci was not in the movie but got to meet pesci at the premier? >> yes. >> jimmy: come on. >> i love joe pesci. >> jimmy: we all love joe pesci. >> i mean, who doesn't he's the best, you know. and "good fellas" is my favorite film of all-time and his performance is my favorite performance. so i go there, and i'm at the premier and i'm talking to leo and hadn't seen scorsese yet that night and i want to go say thanks again.
and i hadn't seen him and he's talking, and i go leo, i want to say hi to scorsese, but i don't want to bother him and he said no, pay your respects. go say hi. and he goes, hey, kid come here. and scorsese brings me over and he starts talking to me. he's like, this is joe. and it's joe pesci. and i had met him once before and he was super cool. but, it was like just standing there with scorsese and joe pesci, the three of us in a conversation. and i just am like -- what the -- what the hell am i doing here? you know? [ laughter ] and they're talking, and eventually in the conversation they're talking to me and then they start talking about something from like 20 years ago, and they're like, we've got to talk to that guy about the thing, you know? and you're like, this is crazy. i'm like in a scene of "good fellas" right now. so, we have this great conversation, and scorsese eventually goes to talk to some other people. and i'm talking to joe. and he goes, you know, you're great in the movie, kid, i'm really proud of you and all this stuff. and i'm like, thank you, you know, you're acting means so much to me. and he goes, here's what i want you to do. and i'm like what?
and he goes, i want you to go buy a helmet. and i go, uh, okay? and he goes, i want you to keep the helmet next to your bed. and every night, i want you to go in the bathroom and put the helmet on every night. and if ever the helmet doesn't fit, it's because too many people are going up here and he puts his fingers in my ass. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my god. that is -- >> and it was the funniest thing. >> jimmy: that is a story right there. that is great. >> and he was dying laughing and i was dying laughing. and he was like good, job kid! and i was like you're the coolest person i've ever met in my entire life. >> jimmy: the only person i would ever let anyone do that to me. i love it. joe pesci would do that. >> he's just a man's man. much respect for that guy. >> jimmy: we have a clip of -- here's jonah hill meeting leonardo dicaprio in the "wolf of wall street." check it out. >> i'm serious. >> yeah, no, i'm serious too. seriously, how much money you make? >> i told you. $70,000.
well, technically, $72,000. last month. >> you make 72 grand in one month? >> yeah. >> i tell you what. you show me a pay stub for $72,000, i quit my job right now and i work for you. >> hey, pauly, what's up? no, yeah, everything is fine. hey, listen, i quit. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, it's just like that. watch jonah hill host "saturday night live" this weekend. [ cheers and applause ] we're rooting for you man. dick cavett joins us after the break. stick around, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ bell dings ]
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influence. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, dick cavett! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you for coming back to the show. >> oh, it's great to be back. >> jimmy: thank you for moon walking. >> oh, the moon walking. i did it before, so i'm using old material on you. >> jimmy: become a tradition. >> my wife martha said, if you do that damn moon walk again on jimmy's show, i'll kill you. >> jimmy: perfect, so, you had to do it, yeah. >> you were the last to see me alive. [ laughter ] but you know, what you did for me is so wonderful. i just love you, jimmy. >> jimmy: aww. [ applause ] >> we're not on the air, are we? >> jimmy: yeah, this is on the air. >> oh, i --
>> jimmy: much better. what did i do? >> i came back -- the degree of our mutual affection. i was in the caribbean yesterday. palm trees and white sand and beautiful blue water. and i came back two days early to be on your show. >> jimmy: oh, that's very nice of you. thank you very much. means something. >> it means i'm nuts. >> jimmy: yeah, what's wrong with you? why would you do that? absolutely, you missed out. >> but, you wrote a forward for my book, which we may talk about or not. but it's so wonderful. it's everything you. it's both zany, sincere, funny, heart-rendering, touching, grateful, everything. >> jimmy: that sounds like a forward to my forward. [ laughter ] when is the book coming out? >> i believe it's november. the next november. >> jimmy: and what is it called? "brief encounters?" >> yeah. my god, you do homework. >> jimmy: i'm pretty good at this, right? no, not this.
sorry. not this. no, i'm not good at this. i'm not saying that. >> what's the capital of north dakota, quick. >> jimmy: uh, "brief encounters." [ laughter ] that's all i can say. >> don't accuse me of plagiarism, 'cause as you know, noel coward wrote the play "brief encounter." but, my first book of "new york times" online blog -- dreadful word was a book called "talk show." and "talk show 2" sounded a little corny so this will be called "brief encounters." >> jimmy: the sqeakwul. [ laughter ] you were the first to call me when i got "late night," and i'll never forget that. it was a really surreal moment for me. because i didn't think it was real. i was like, dick cavett is calling me? i guess i'm in the talk show club. there is -- there's not that many people that have their own talk show. >> i didn't realize it would have such an effect on you. i hate to tell you this, but that wasn't me. >> jimmy: i knew it. see, much too late. do you remember what you said to me? what advice you gave me? >> get out of the job if you can. >> jimmy: yes, absolutely. no, you didn't say that.
>> and if you can't -- i had going on the show at the moment you enter advice, which got -- do some before the show, you have nerves, do violent exercise, play a rough tennis game, go to a rough workout. have some rough sex. [ laughter ] whichever -- anything that makes you sweat. >> jimmy: i've been doing that, yeah, for five years. and we have a great show. all thanks to you. ♪ very happy marriage. >> and if you can combine them all under one -- >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. very tricky. the pay per view special. >> do one thing for me. >> jimmy: sure. >> it's so cold -- let's do a cold joke. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and it's an honor to you in its way, because i wrote it for mr. johnny carson of nebraska. >> jimmy: i would love to. >> your whole part is -- >> jimmy: how cold is it? >> boy, it sure is cold out. >> jimmy: how cold is it? >> it's so cold, the flashers in central park are only describing
themselves. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: i love it. you worked "the jack paar show." which is right across the hall. >> right here. >> jimmy: where we are doing the "tonight show." we're bringing it back to new york and back to that studio. >> you're going back to 86 -- is it still called 8b, or 7b? >> jimmy: no, 6b. >> 6b, that's right. i was never good on numbers. no wonder, i kept delivering to the wrong floor, my jokes. >> jimmy: no, but you were -- jack paar, that was 1961, around that area? >> you're right again. >> jimmy: and he actually had you on his show. oh, you were a talent -- >> how do you know this? >> jimmy: because we found a clip. >> get out of here. >> jimmy: it's pretty cool. here's jack paar having dick cavett on his first -- >> oh, i know -- >> jimmy: watch this. >> we have a young fella on the show who works on the show booking talent, and his name is dick cavett, and he's a yale graduate, and he speaks german. he says that --
see did think the germans would find you funny. although she doesn't understand you. she said, whenever i see his face, i have to laugh. [ laughter and applause ] could be the end of the yale german department. >> one more laugh, and it's going to be the end of you. [ laughter and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: one more laugh and it will be the end of you. >> you know who that was? that was marlena schmidt, she an engineer from erste deutschland. how do you say in english, east germany. and i had intensive german, nine times a week, so you learn german whether you wish to or not. and i made an awful mistake, went back to germany to be on television there, they found marlena, they brought her out, and i said -- "mein gott sie sind gewachst." i meant to say "sie sind gewachsen" which means "you have grown." >> jimmy: and what did you say? >> "sie sind gewachst," is "you
have been waxed." [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that's another way -- i think they did say that in germany. i can't wait for the new book to come out. and i can't wait for you to come back and join us on "the tonight show." >> do you have any fears of how a talk show wears you down? look what it did to me. i used to be a tall red-headed man. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm so excited this is what i have to look forward to. you're a good man. dick cavett, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] come on back we're going to cook with chef wylie dufresne. stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪
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this is the creamy chicken corn chowder. i mean, look at it. so indulgent. did i tell you i am on the... [ both ] chicken pot pie diet! me too! [ male announcer ] so indulgent, you'll never believe they're light. 100-calorie progresso light soups. [ female announcer ] at 100 calories, not all food choices add up. some are giant. some not so giant. when managing your weight, bigger is always better. ♪ ho ho ho ♪ green giant
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. we are here with one of the most inventive chefs around. he's the chef and owner of wd-50 and alder, here in new york. he's the 2013 james beard award winner for best chef, new york city! please welcome chef wylie dufresne, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how can you beat that intro right there? questlove is our resident foodie, so he's going to join us with what we're doing tonight. well, we're starting off with --
you're always doing something different and crazy. and i love it so much. we're going to drink a shrimp cocktail? >> yeah, well, tonight is about shrimp. so we're going to start with a shrimp cocktail. >> jimmy: i love it. oh, i get it. shrimp cocktail. >> so here we have some vodka that's been infused with a little bit of horseradish. >> jimmy: of course. >> and then, we have some clarified bloody mary mix and a little bit of shrimp on a skewer with some powdered bloody mary. so we're just going to boom. boom, boom. >> jimmy: okay. you know that? >> questlove: i know it. >> you ready? you got it? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: going to get ready. boom, boom, and boom. and then, the fourth boom is when i hit the floor from being wasted. [ laughter ] cheers. cheers to you, buddy. >> cheers, thank you. >> jimmy: here we go. >> questlove: ready? uh-huh. ow! [ light laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm the only one who's down? >> jimmy: that was amazing. i remember going to your restaurant, wd-50, and you said -- at the end of the night, you said, "hey, you drink jagermeister?" and i go, "yeah."
and you go, "well, i got you some right now. here's a shot." and it was a bowl of ice cream. you made it into -- >> we froze jager for you. >> jimmy: yeah, you froze it. you're always doing something different. frozen jagermeister is awesome. should be a new ben and jerry's flavor. so what are we making here now? we're making ramen? >> so, yeah, we're making ramen. and ramen is traditionally served with noodles, obviously. but we're going to give a little bit twist, and instead of using actual noodles, we're going to make noodles out of shrimp. >> jimmy: okay. how do you do that? >> so we've taken some shrimp and we've pureed it. and we put in here, in our noodle maker. and we're just going to shoot it into this water, and it's going to cook the shrimp, and we're going to make noodles. you want to try? >> jimmy: yeah, how's it -- yeah. >> all right. >> jimmy: weird! [ laughter ] it's almost like i have a zion my head. sorry, sorry! i had to do it! i'm 12 years old! i'm 12 years old. [ laughter ] push? >> yeah, just push. there you go.
>> jimmy: ah! you want to try it? >> questlove: no! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: just give it a shot. >> yeah, you like shrimp? here. there you go. just push. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, that's good. you got skills there. >> it's just shrimp, so putting it in here. >> jimmy: that's shrimp right there. so it's cooking. how hot is the water? >> it is about 60 degrees. here, put your hand in there. not too bad. >> jimmy: okay. yeah, pretty good. >> so that's it. so then, normally, you take them out. they're ready. they've cooked. >> jimmy: shrimp is all the way cooked. that's just shrimp, and you made it into noodles. >> we just made noodles out of shrimp so -- >> jimmy: gosh. >> now we're just going to make the noodles. here, just like this. >> jimmy: see, this is why you're a genius. mom, if you're watching, be so proud of this guy. he's awesome. >> so that would be it. >> jimmy: okay. >> just make -- so we go ahead and make our noodles. we've gone ahead and made some over there for you. >> jimmy: gotcha. >> but this is how they go. and then, we basically have assembled sort of the traditional garnishes for ramen. >> jimmy: okay. >> we've got our own noodles. we've got a riff on that. and i like eggs a lot. and i like eggs in my ramen. >> jimmy: pretty traditional,
yeah. >> yeah, yeah. you see eggs a lot. so what we've done here -- we've got to get them out of the shell, which certainly takes a little bit of time. but an easy way to do it -- you just peel a little bit off the bottom. you peel a bit off the top, and give it a blow. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no way! >> there you go. >> jimmy: that's very cool, right there, huh? >> give it a try. >> jimmy: yeah. you want to try it? >> questlove: heck yeah. [ laughter ] >> so you just wrap your hands around -- there's a hole on top. >> questlove: okay. >> just like you're playing a trombone. squeeze a little bit and blow. [ laughter and applause ] there you go. >> jimmy: i went for it on mine. i blew and then bit half of it as well. [ laughter ] but it looked nice on the ramen right there. okay, good. and the number-one rule for ramen? >> broth. >> jimmy: yep. and you have to slurp. >> you've got to slurp. you've got to slurp. >> jimmy: that's the only way to do it. >> so this is what we're going to do. these don't actually go there. >> jimmy: sorry about that. >> that's okay. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's why i don't have my own restaurant at all. yeah. >> that's okay. so, again, we take a little bit of noodles. >> jimmy: yep.
>> let's see. use a drumstick here. stir up the broth. pour some -- no, no, don't do that. >> jimmy: oh, sorry. [ laughter ] sushi. >> so we've got some pork here. a little bit of pork shank, if you want. you can have a little bit of fried garlic, if you like fried garlic. little bit of fried garlic in there. >> jimmy: gosh. >> some ground-up sesame seeds, if you will. and a little bit of nori. everybody likes nori. >> jimmy: yeah, you always have nori lying around the house. don't know what to do with it. >> a little bit of pickled ginger, and then some scallions. so why don't you guys go ahead and just build your own. >> jimmy: this is awesome right there. we're going to do that right now. you guys, thanks to chef wylie dufresne. check out his restaurants, wd-50 and alder here in new york city. hi paulie! we'll be right back! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to jonah hill, dick cavett, chef wylie dufresne! and the greatest band in late night, the roots, right there, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for carson daly. thank you for watching. have a good night. hope to see you tomorrow. buh-bye! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
♪ >> carson: hey, gang. i'm carson daly coming to you from e.v.r. and thank you for staying up late. we have a two thumbs up show for you tonight. let's get to it. coming up, sirah performs from the fonda and film maker steph green gets the spotlight treatment. but first, it's all about a very funny new web series from not one, but two veteran "snl" writers. i'm talking about paula pell and james anderson's "hudson valley ballers." for more, here's tonight's "last call spotlight." >> we wrote some country songs during a road trip back when we were, 19, 20 years old. so we put one of those in it. >> pigs, cows, grain.