Skip to main content

tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  October 7, 2014 12:36am-1:38am PDT

12:36 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to jeremy renner, carol burnett, mario batali. joe perry right there, oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause ] and the roots from philadelphia. that's you, you're the roots. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. i hope to see you tomorrow, everybody. thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight, james spader actress rachel dratch music from la roux
12:37 am
featuring the 8g band. [ cheers and applause ] and now, here he is, seth meyers. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening, everyone, welcome. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how's everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] that's great to hear. so great to hear. and this -- this was rough. this was rough. former cia director, leon panetta, he said that it seemed like president obama has lost his way. apparently, it's gotten so bad that this morning, obama was seen asking a white house intruder for directions. [ laughter ]
12:38 am
sad. [ applause ] not good. here's some good news though, the supreme court is refusing to hear any cases on gay marriage, which has opened the door for same-sex couples to get married in 11 new states. 11 new states. [ cheers and applause ] great news. wedding planners everywhere are excited because now, they can get married. [ laughter ] this is just amazing, the san francisco giants beat the washington nationals this weekend in the longest postseason game in baseball history. it took 18 innings. 18 innings. the game was reportedly so long, that a couple from the kiss cam got divorced. [ laughter and applause ] probably because he kept saying,
12:39 am
no, it will be over next inning and then that is grounds for divorce. if you're watching the news, all anyone is talking about is ebola. when today, president obama called for new airport screening protocols to stop the spread of ebola. the screening will be almost as thorough as the one to make sure you don't have a bottle of water. [ laughter ] we are putting our best bottle of water people on it. [ applause ] remove your shoes, your laptop and please put your ebola in the tray. i'm pre-check. oh, you can go right through. you can bring your ebola with you. this is cool. drake has earned his 72nd appearance, 72nd appearance on the billboard top 100 chart, passing the beatles to become eighth best of all time, or as he put it -- as drake put it -- started from the bottom, now i'm eighth. [ laughter and applause ]
12:40 am
pretty happy about that. this is interesting, the "new york post" is saying that oscar wilde is responsible for kim kardashian's rise to fame because he was the first person famous for being famous. when asked his thoughts about it, kim asked is oscar the one that lives in a trash can? [ laughter and applause ] i don't like him. he's grumpy. he's a real grump. [ laughter ] oscar the grump. ikea says it wants to come out with a new line of furniture that could assemble without any tools in less than five minutes. it's what other stores call furniture. [ laughter and applause ] so, not that big of a deal ikea. here's some tech news. on october 16th, apple will hold
12:41 am
an event to debut the new model of the ipad. details are starting to leak out already. for example, you're still going to look stupid taking pictures with it. [ laughter and applause ] i'm not from here. i am visiting your times square. now is a good time to take my wallet. [ laughter ] not sure what to make of this. the u.s. coast guard rescued a man who was attempting to run from florida to bermuda in a plastic bubble. [ laughter ] the man is now resting comfortably in a cage on some wood shavings. [ laughter and applause ]
12:42 am
that's a long run. [ laughter ] listen to this - robert morris university has begun offering athletic scholarships for video game players. athletic scholarships for video game players. in order to keep their scholarships, players must keep a grade average of a, a, b, b, up, down, left, right. [ applause ] this story is insane. a woman at a seattle gas station was attacked and robbed by a bachelorette party because she was holding her hot dog too close to them. [ laughter ] which is weird, because usually, if you hold your hot dog too close to a bachelorette party, you get tips stuffed down your g-string. [ applause ] i know. i know from experience.
12:43 am
i had to work my way through improv school. [ laughter ] this surprised me. in an interview with oprah winfrey, former disney star, raven-symone, says she does not like being called gay or african-american. that's so raven. [ laughter and applause ] congratulations to blake lively who announced today that she is pregnant. [ cheers and applause ] give it up. what happens next, only time can tell, xo, xo, gossip girl. [ laughter and applause ] some crime news, police in new mexico are searching for a thief
12:44 am
who stole a hot air balloon from the albuquerque international balloon fiesta. catchy name, i'm surprised i screwed it up. [ laughter ] the albuquerque international balloon festival hot air balloon has gone missing. i'm not a detective, but have you tried looking downwind? [ laughter ] i'm not a detective. i am someone who reads jokes for a living, i didn't do very good. but you know what, maybe -- you take care of finding the hot air balloon. [ cheers and applause ] i'll stick with screwing up my own -- my own job. this is incredible, a cat in florida had its life saved by a blood transfusion from a dog. unfortunately, it later died from exhaustion after chasing itself around the house. [ laughter ] dog blood. and finally, mario lopez reveals
12:45 am
in his new autobiography that he doesn't like tiger woods. luckily, no one will ever find out because it's in mario lopez's autobiography. ladies and gentlemen, this is the 8g band. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: how we doing 8g band? everybody have a good weekend? i love it i'm happy to hear that. i had a good weekend. my mom and dad were in town. it was my mother's birthday, so we had a lovely weekend and they're here tonight, my parents are here tonight. and i just want to say this, 'cause we are going to cut to them in a second. mom, when you're here and we cut to you, you often look -- you smile so big that you look a little crazy. so, i'm just gonna give you a little heads up. we are gonna cut to you. i think it's important -- [ laughter ]
12:46 am
you got to look real cool. you -- just give me like total ice, like it's not a big deal you're here, you're just a lady who's at show and you might not even be that impressed so far, so, totally straight face. ladies and gentlemen, give it up for my mom and dad. [ cheers and applause ] it's so bad. it's so bad. i gave you a warning and everything. hopeless. you're hopeless -- hopelessly in love with your son. [ laughter ] we got a fantastic show for you tonight. from the hit nbc show, "the blacklist," james spader is here! [ cheers and applause ] also joining us, star of the new off-broadway play "tailspin," my good friend rachel dratch will be joining us. [ cheers and applause ] and we'll have music from la roux, which is excellent, can't wait to hear her.
12:47 am
>> excuse me, seth. excuse me, sorry. >> seth: i'm sorry, this is barry, our i.t. guy, everybody. >> hi, everybody. [ applause ] sorry to bug you, but i got to change your nbc password on your laptop. >> seth: do you -- do we have to do this now, barry? >> yeah, they're making do this to everybody's computers. it'll be real quick. >> seth: okay. if it'll real quick, you can do it. >> yeah. sorry. okay. let's see. so, we have to make your new password a little complicated and unique so that identity thieves can't figure it out. so, let see, okay, so they're prompting me for a new password right here. you know what, i'm just gonna put in a whole new password for you, okay? >> seth: okay, great. >> great. [ laughter ] okay, and click enter, and done.
12:48 am
there is your new password. >> seth: okay. sorry, barry, that's just a bunch of random numbers and letters, how am i ever gonna remember that? >> okay, it's easy. you know, cause here's something i do with my passwords, okay? what i do is i take all these random numbers and letters and then i just make a silly little song out of them. and you know what, i will do one right now for you, for your password. >> seth: a silly song? >> yes. ♪ >> seth: oh, no. ♪ there's one thing you can do if your password is too long ♪ ♪ it's easy to remember if you make a little song ♪ [ laughter and applause ] ♪ 24 x 869 z it's a capital z not a lower case z what comes next ♪ ♪ it's a lower case z then a p-o-p for 3 g 9 but the thing you ♪ ♪ have to do is spell off the nine
12:49 am
and make that i into a number 1 ♪ >> seth: i don't think that song will help me. [ cheers and applause ] >> well, we are not finished yet. there's a lot more here. [ laughter ] ♪ after the 9 comes a food that is green it's a asparagus but without any of the as ♪ [ laughter ] >> seth: so, s-p-r-g-u-s? >> now you're getting it. >> seth: no i'm not. [ laughter ] ♪ for the next character we're gonna use a symbol what symbol would that be why a hashtag, of course ♪ ♪ and that is followed by a lower case y, why so you'll remember it ♪ >> seth: i'm really lost. i don't like this. ♪ 8214653 but none of those numbers it's just the letter t ♪ [ laughter ] >> seth: why not just sing t? ♪ next up is a letter you'll see that
12:50 am
looks like an attached upside down v ♪ >> seth: an attached double upside down v, is that a letter m? >> yes! ♪ next is the number that equals this 1135692 minus 1135691 ♪ >> seth: so, one? >> good job, buddy! [ applause ] ♪ and all of this is finished with the letter p, 15 times in a row and ending with a z ♪ ♪ and that's how you remember your password ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: i don't know why anyone's clapping. i really don't think i'm going to remember that song. >> you can get it. just do it a couple times and you'll remember it, okay? let's see. so your new password here is 24 x 869 capital z lower case z pop 43 gn 1 nesprgus hastag lowecase y tm 1 pppppppppppppppz.
12:51 am
>> seth: barry, now doesn't everyone here watching know my password as well? >> yes. yes, they do. crap. [ laughter ] all right. you know what, i'm just gonna give you a new one. okay, we'll do a rap this time. wiki wiki, first you take the g to the grz. >> seth: i don't want to do this. >> take the g -- >> seth: we will be right back with more "late night." [ cheers and applause ] ♪
12:52 am
so did you hear the new iphone is out? i'm getting one! sprint is offering this exclusive new plan with unlimited data. the plan is only $50 a month! $50? unlimited iphone! [glass shattering] so should we eat? the new sprint simply unlimited plan, exclusively for iphone 6. unlimited data, talk and text for just $50 a month. switch to sprint and we'll buy out your contract. it's the best value in wireless. takeand . . . exhale. . . . . aflac! and a gentle wavelike motion...
12:53 am
ahhh- ahhhhhh. liberate your spine... ahhh-ahhhhhh......aflac! and reach, toes blossoming... not that great at yoga. yeah, but when i slipped a disk he paid my claim in just four days. ahh! four days? yep. see why speed matters at [sfx] duck snoring you're unpacking already? yeah. help me find some mugs? sure. ♪ [ beep ] hey. okay. -these'll do. -yeah. [ male announcer ] wake up to the mountain grown aroma of folgers. ♪ the best part of wakin' up so, where do you want to start? i think this is a pretty good place. ♪ is folgers in your cup
12:54 am
12:55 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everyone. you know, we here at "late night," we just love slogans. slogans are so much fun. for example, american express slogan is "don't leave home without it." i won't. timex -- "takes a licking but keeps on ticking" sure does, but don't lick your watch. [ laughter ] hebrew national hot dogs -- "we answer to a higher authority." you sure do. the jews. [ laughter and applause ] so we got to thinking, wouldn't everything benefit from a slogan? so we came up with some for you in a segment that we call "new slogans." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ let's start with a slogan for hand sanitizer. hand sanitizer -- lose the
12:56 am
germs, keep the dirt. [ laughter ] now it's clean dirt. next, we have iced coffee, let's see it its slogan. iced coffee -- pay twice for ice. [ laughter and applause ] don't forget to remind them to leave room for coffee. next up we have cats, let's see the slogan for cats. cats -- man's best frenemy. i hate you. i love you. and now that you fed me, i hate you again. [ laughter ] next we have tacos, very popular with trucks. let's see their slogan. tacos -- burritos that quit halfway. [ laughter ] lazy burrito. [ applause ] next, we have extra strength hair gel. extra strength hair gel -- like your hairstyle? you better. [ laughter ] 'cause it's not going anywhere. next, we have instagram, let's take a look at instagram. instagram -- the pictures have filters, the people don't.
12:57 am
your whole life, you want to show everybody your whole life? okay. [ applause ] whatever. next, we have industrial paper cutters. industrial paper cutters -- they're finger-losing good. [ laughter and applause ] that's what you get for crafting. [ laughter ] next, we have leather jackets. leather jackets -- wear the beef. [ laughter ] next, we have quinoa. let's see their slogan. quinoa -- the shrug you can eat. [ laughter ] how was your quinoa? finally, we have trees. let's see it. trees -- mm-mm wood. [ laughter ] this has been "new slogans," it's been brought to you by time-warner cable, whose slogan is time-warner cable -- enjoy nothing, your cable is out.
12:58 am
we will be right back with james spader. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ this collection is close to my heart. it's inspired by the city i love. [ female announcer ] aveeno® daily moisturizing lotion has active naturals® oat with five vital nutrients. [ aniston ] because beautiful skin goes with everything. aveeno®. naturally beautiful results™. you'd do that for me? really? yeah, i'd like that.
12:59 am
who are you talking to? uh, it's jake from state farm. sounds like a really good deal. jake from state farm at three in the morning. who is this? it's jake from state farm. what are you wearing, jake from state farm? [ jake ] uh... khakis. she sounds hideous. well she's a guy, so... [ male announcer ] another reason more people stay with state farm. get to a better state. ♪ get to a better state. (dootrick or treat! mmm! thank you! mmm! mmm! fireball. magic.
1:00 am
annnndddddddddd fireball. you and this army. clash of clans download for free. ♪ ye- yes! we have the new iphone. how- cause everyone's coming in for the new iphone. wh-what... kind of service plan can you get? well right now if you select the 15 gig plan we'll double your data and make it 30 gigs for the same price. well that- great! you'll take it. in head * are you inside my mind right now? nope where was... albuquerque who was the porcupine what is my fave- hollandaise sauce no way... the new iphone is here and now you get 30 gigs of data to share starting at $160 dollars a month.
1:01 am
1:02 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everyone, our first guest is a three-time emmy award winning actor, who currently stars as ex-government agent raymond redington in the massively popular series, "the blacklist," which has just returned for its second season. it airs monday nights at 10 right here on nbc. let's take a look. [ knocking ] >> i have no interest in seeing you, go away, you're not welcome here. >> i told you i'm sorry, what more can i say? >> you knew i was in recovery. >> i didn't -- okay, yes, i did, but you were having such a great time and after everything that happened with cheryl and that cuban boxer, what was that -- >> i'm not talking to but this. >> raphaelle, god, that hair, beautiful hair. i thought you could use a little distraction. you forget, we won 25,000 on one roll. >> yes, and i lost twice as much after you left. i woke up in that hotel, still don't even know how i got there. that kind of money means nothing to you, but to me it's --
1:03 am
>> an olive branch, with interest. >> please welcome james spader! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: welcome, it's so lovely to see you. >> thank you. it's lovely to be seen. [ laughter ] >> seth: congratulations on the show. it's funny, you know, when new shows start, the last time i saw you was right when they were announcing "blacklist." >> that's right, and announcing this. >> seth: yeah. it is very nice to still be doing them both. [ laughter ] we're very lucky. >> how do you like your new job? >> seth: i like it a great deal. it's really nice. >> you know, on the way up here tonight, i was thinking to myself -- i was thinking about this show and i realized that late night's done for the next 25, 30 years, you guys are all the same sort
1:04 am
of generation, all the same sort of age and -- unless one of you tanks terribly -- [ laughter ] >> seth: yes. it would be nice though. it would be nice. >> no upward mobility either. >> seth: yeah, no. exactly. i'm really locked in. that's why i'm taking very good care of everything. we have to live here a very long time. [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> seth: you play a character on your show who is very enigmatic. i feel like the audience wants to learn more about you and your story. do you, as the actor, know the full story or are you finding out with the people who are watching? >> you know, i have a -- i know the end game, you know, but i -- you know, you don't know on a television series what the lifespan of the series is gonna be, so you're -- you don't know whether you have seven years to tell the story or whether you have two years. and in this show, you know, it's a -- it's got a procedural aspect that is, you know, autonomous week to week, but -- and can stand alone, those stories from week to week. but ultimately, they all serve this sort of greater story that
1:05 am
is a much longer sort of unraveling ball of twine. >> seth: it's really nice to have both. >> and that you don't -- so, i have a sense of what the long range is, but -- and the short range, i have a sense a few episodes ahead, but still it's a surprise. i mean, for me, that's what i was looking for. something that i was-- going to be able to sustain for a long period of time and i would still -- i would never lose my curiosity, i would never lose the sense of surprise and the show does that, it's exciting for me to see a new twist and a new turn when the scripts come out because, i mean, like next week's show is just fantastic. absolutely fantastic. and i -- and for me, i get the same pleasure the viewer gets. i never understood that really. i didn't watch much television at all. then i started working on a television show and i realized that anticipation that you have for the next week and what's gonna happen, especially something where there's a continuing greater story. >> seth: do you watch it when it
1:06 am
airs? are you- >> no, no, no, i watch it ahead of time. [ light laughter ] >> seth: yeah, okay, that's better. 'cause you know why? commercials. you can skip the commercials? >> for me, it really is the -- [ laughter ] for me, it really is if i don't watch it on the weekend it won't get watched until the next weekend. >> seth: got it, and you helped create sort of the look of your character and the wardrobe sense. are you always collaborative in that and with this show, were they happy to sort of have you collaborate on that? >> i didn't ask. >> seth: you didn't ask? [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. >> but it really was practicality, you know? he wears a hat all the time, but he doesn't have any hair on his head. and so, you know, and yet he is moving from one geographical point to another very quickly and very often in the same day. so, if it's raining or blazing sun or whatever it may be, he is prepared. his clothing is all clothing that can -- he has to travel lightly.
1:07 am
so, and he may be going from the jungle in one day to the boardroom in the same day and so his wardrobe all has to be comfortable and fit any setting and yet everything has able to go we having else. >> seth: i feel like you should have your own line of clothes, [ laughter ] just so there can be a commercial -- i want there to be a commercial where you look at the camera and go "from the jungle to the boardroom." [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> seth: is this true that you had a brief stint as a yoga instructor? [ laughter ] because i will say, i was -- >> i was in no way, shape or form a yoga instructor. >> seth: people gave you money with the hopes that you would instruct them on yoga? >> yes, they did. i man, it was shameful what i was doing. [ laughter ] i had -- >> seth: what were you doing, the great yoga scam? >> it was the great yoga scam. [ light laughter ] the great yoga scam. no i had applied for a job at the exercise -- a health club or whatever they are called here in the city.
1:08 am
>> seth: you are so unqualified. [ laughter ] >> i had -- i was completely unqualified. i really -- i was a heavy smoker, i really was not -- but i had done it because i had heard that the hours are flexible and there are a lot of girls around. [ laughter ] and so -- >> seth: you must have nailed the interview. [ laughter ] >> no, it was a bait and switch, i was living with my older sister at the time and she went into the place to sign up and become a member and then as a by the way, i applied for a job. >> seth: got it >> okay, so i got it because of my older sister. and she's a great interviewer. so, anyway, i -- so i applied for the job and they said, you know, "would you be able to teach yoga? that's the opening that we have right now." and taking into account, this was, i don't know, some time in the '70s or something like that. and it was really -- exercise clubs at that point were basically doing, sort of, naval calisthenics. >> seth: right. okay. >> it was like jumping jacks, and running in place, and
1:09 am
pushups and crunches. >> seth: got it. >> there was no aerobics or no jazzercise or whatever the hell it's called. [ light laughter ] i'm behind the times. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah, no. jazzercise, that's -- >> i realized as soon as that came out of my mouth! >> seth: this is way earlier than jazzercise. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> anyway, so, they said, "well, we have an opening for yoga." and i said, "yeah, yoga, great." [ light laughter ] i'll do yoga, you know? and so, i had gone to -- i actually grocery store checkout stand, you know how they have the little books, pamphlets, very slim volumes of different things like this. and i bought, which at that time i thought was a yoga thing. now looking back on it, i realized, i think it probably the book was like stretches that one does before or after yoga. or the book should have said on it, "this is everything but yoga." [ laughter ] but yoga was somewhere. >> seth: yeah. >> anyway, so i leaf through it, my classes were -- i dimmed the lights and i would sort of lay down in the front. [ laughter ] and i would just get people into -- i would talk them, i
1:10 am
didn't even really show them, i would talk them into some sort of odd contortion that i interpreted as being yogic or yogi. [ laughter ] or whatever it is. the only thing i gleaned from the pamphlet was that you get them to hold that position [ laughter ] and then breathe, okay? and then also turn the temperature up in the place. so the temperature would be up, the lights would be down and people would be, you know, sort of like this. [ laughter ] and they'd -- okay, and i'd be in the front, i'd be like, "breathe." [ laughter ] relax. and i would doze off in the front of the class. and every so often, i would sort of, like, come to like this, and i would sort of wake up and i would look over and everybody would be in the classroom would be like this, looking up, like what's going on up in the front. are we supposed to continue holding and breathing? but anyway, that was my yoga class. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: someone in that class
1:11 am
said -- they decided we're gonna invent jazzercise. this is so bad, we need to invent jazzercise. [ light laughter ] thank you so much for being here. james spader, everyone! [ cheers and applause ] "the blacklist" airs monday nights at 10 right here on nbc. we will be right back with rachel dratch. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ready for a great career? devry university's merit-based career catalyst scholarship can help you get started with up to $20,000 for qualified new students. apply now and start working toward your career, like devry grad, shelly joseph. as a student at devry, a business career was my goal. this was my career training ground... my professors, were also my coaches. their guidance helped me find career success... at microsoft. find your success with our career catalyst scholarship. classes start october 27. get started now. visit
1:12 am
drove to her wedding. started my camry. did not forever hold my peace. [laughing] wow! the bold new camry. one bold choice leads to another. toyota. let's go places. shopping for my daughters ithat's just not enough crotch. do these shoes say "mathlete" to you?
1:13 am
ha! where do you put the books?! these are still cool, right? number 15 of my 20, desperately trying to keep my girls from growing up too fast. the amex everyday credit card, with no annual fee. make 20 or more purchases in a monthly billing period and earn 20% more rewards. is this nut-free? it's membership that rewards you for the things you already buy, every day. what's your 20? wto dirty their hands withtrue sendeavour, not speculation. comradeship, essential. courageous men and women to uphold over 160 years of tradition. to celebrate the most awarded blended scotch in history.
1:14 am
this is true scotch. join us.
1:15 am
1:16 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everyone. our next comedian tonight is an actress and author you know from "saturday night live" and movies like "click" and"just go with it." her new off-broadway show, "tailspin", is playing at this lynn redgrave theater here in new york. please welcome my very good friend, rachel dratch. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ hi there. >> hi, this is so exciting. >> seth: isn't it exciting? [ cheers and applause ] you're here! oh. congratulations on the play. i came and saw it last week. >> yes. >> seth: it's so wonderful. >> thank you. >> seth: it's -- describe it real quick. [ light laughter ] >> we're diving right in here. okay. i'm just excited to be on seth's
1:17 am
show. >> seth: it's very exciting to have you on the show. >> so happy for you. >> seth: we spent a lot of years upstairs together. >> we did. yes, okay sorry. back to my current accomplishments. [ laughter ] >> seth: your many accomplishments. >> okay. okay. >> seth: this is -- this is based on sort of the recent political scandals? >> yes. >> seth: larry craig, mark sanford, mark foley, anthony weiner. >> yes, basically the writer, mario correa, he assembled all of these real texts and emails and interviews and everything, so it's actually -- it's all verbatim and he put it into this play of "tailspin." and i play all of the women, the wives, mistresses -- [ laughter ] beards. >> seth: yeah. >> and a special appearance by barbara walters. >> seth: it's outstanding. [ cheers and applause ] it's so -- the four guys are great, but it is a -- it's so wonderful to see you in a play where you get to play different characters because, of course that's what i know you for. >> thank you. >> seth: but seeing you do barbara walters was outstanding and these are actual lines that she says. give us some of the winners from
1:18 am
her, because these are lines she actually said. >> she actually said -- okay. so interview with jenny sanford, so, she is like, "the one birthday he gave you a used bike." [ laughter ] [ applause ] that's just one sample. and she goes-- she is like, she names, like, "we've seen the pictures of the various wives -- her husband's affair, mrs. spitzer and her husband's infidelity. they stood next to their husbands, you did not stand next to your husband." [ laughter ] [ applause ] okay. i don't know where i'm looking. okay. >> seth: we -- i had some pretty sweet real estate at "snl." which was right next to you at the read-through table. >> yes. >> seth: so that's wednesday we sit together and read all the sketches. i got to sit next to you for like five years. >> yeah, we'd write little notes to each other, like we were in class or something. and actually, because we were seated next to each other, a character was born. >> seth: a character was born. >> due to our proximitity, >> seth: yes.
1:19 am
>> because we would talk about the sketches, so, i don't know how this happened, but i would be like, "hey, you think this sketch has legs?" like that kind of thing. and then he is like, "i'd like you to meet my agent, abe shinewald." >> seth: right. >> so then we -- >> seth: we created. >> we wrote the sketch where i played this old man. >> seth: you did the heavy lifting, because you played super hollywood agent, abe shinewald. here is look at that. [ cheers and applause ] i think you need to explain what's in there. >> he's always eating from a tub of coleslaw. [ laughter ] that was his character trait. [ light laughter ] but, yes, one of the first times -- so at "snl", like you're putting up your sketch and you hope people laugh at it, just at the table. so i actually went downstairs to some deli and i actually bought a tub of coleslaw. i was like, "i'm gonna sell this at the table." i hope it gets on. [ light laughter ] so, yeah. >> seth: and you -- you ate coleslaw the way i picture, like, beavers eating through a log. [ laughter ] it was just like, like -- like coleslaw dust flying out. and of course, this has -- a
1:20 am
line that i would say we quote to one a other every time we see each other, abe believed that all films should have busty women. >> they should have big boobs. >> seth: and always take a out a dollar and show it to me, his grandson, and would say -- >> "double ds, double these." [ applause ] >> seth: you know- that's the first time -- we said that line in front of people 15 times, that's the first that got a reaction. >> that's true. >> seth: where were you? where were you in 2005? [ laughter ] >> yeah, we thought it was the funniest thing ever and the audience kind of like, huh on that one. >> seth: did you know who also was the funniest thing? >> who. >> seth: because we wrote it once for snoop dogg. and it didn't get picked. i don't think we did it in a sketch, but all week he would by and just go, "double d's, double these." he was so happy. he loved it. i kept thinking one day he'll put it in a song. >> that'd be great. that'd be awesome.
1:21 am
>> seth: i think we should just say that if he wants to do that, that would be fine. >> snoop, yeah, it's all yours. [ laughter ] >> seth: any other characters over the years that you didn't feel like got the fair shake? >> well, seth, funny you should mention that. [ laughter ] >> seth: well, i want to you talk about david "mac" wilson. >> okay. there's this character that i tried to put up several times, his name was david "mac" wilson. actually, andrew steel first invented him, for that elian gonzalez. >> seth: yes. >> this is back in the aughts guys. [ laughter ] you remember elian gonzales? >> seth: he's a grown man. >> so the cuban boy. >> seth: he's a grown man now. >> he has children. okay. [ laughter ] okay. so. so, where was i? >> seth: elian gonzalez is watching this at home being like, "why they talking about me?" [ laughter ] >> david "mac" wilson was this annoying child star who was, like, i don't really know how to describe now. but would be like -- he'd always talk about the macaroni and cheese. >> seth: he was very -- >> business savvy. >> seth: business savy. >> showbiz savvy. so he'd be like, "hey, you seen my mac and cheese commercial?
1:22 am
it's the cheesiest!" [ light laughter ] like, "ever work with de niro? that's be a dream project." [ laughter ] anyway. he died. [ laughter ] >> seth: you did you it -- you recently did -- we had paula pell on and we had tina on. paula wrote this movie, "the nest." tina fey, amy poehler, yourself. >> yes. >> seth: you got to go out. maya was in it. >> yes. >> seth: and it was like -- there were party scenes in the movie? >> yes. so i played -- it was so much fun. so i played this guest at their party, the whole movie is based on they throw a party 'cause their parents are about to sell the house. so, there were a bunch of really fun -- like jon glaser and kate mckinnon and bobby moynihan, et cetera. one day we'd each have a line and a lot of days we were guests at this party, like drinking in the background. so, it reminded me of my old days. like one of the first movies i ever got a part in, i was an extra in this movie called "straight talk" with dolly parton and james woods as a romantic couple. yeah. [ applause ] [ laughter ] >> seth: the first of the
1:23 am
dolly parton/james woods romantic trilogy. >> exactly. [ laughter ] so -- because the chemistry was palpable. [ laughter ] so anyway, i was an extra and it was so cute, because all i do is walk by a few times in the background. but my parents rented the movie and they had friends over to watch it and everything. like they'd freeze it like, "there she is!" walking by a frosted office window. [ light laughter ] >> seth: here's what i would like to do now, we're gonna show a clip and i would like you to be your mother talking over it, so this would be what she would say >> i haven't seen this since 2000, no -- 19 something. 80 something. >> seth: here we go. >> okay there's dolly parton. what's happening -- [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that was fast! that was fast. >> seth: i feel like i don't want to underestimate the work you did in this film, you look like a person working very hard there. [ laughter ] >> i had a whole backstory going
1:24 am
on. >> seth: you had a backstory? >> oh, my gosh, look, there i am again. >> seth: there you are there. so pretty much -- >> look at my skinny arms. okay. yes. go ahead. >> seth: what was your backstory? >> oh, god, i don't remember. i'm on a movie! that was my backstory. >> seth: you were an extra in a movie. >> excited. yeah. yeah. >> seth: and are you enjoying -- the schedule, enjoy doing a show every night? is it fun? >> yeah, yeah, it's kind of like -- i'm not used to working. [ laughter ] i mean, i don't mean like i sit around and eat bonbons. i mean, like, every day, every night, matinee, la la la. it goes back to the old second city days and -- [ english accent ] -- i started in the theater, seth. [ laughter ] so i am used to the every night. [ cheers and applause ] get me a long cigarette. >> seth: [ english accent ] well, on behalf of the theater, we are very happy you're back. we are very, very happy you're back. rachel dratch, everybody! >> oh that's it! [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: tickets for "tailspin" are available through november 30th.
1:25 am
we will be right back with music from la roux. ♪ fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. everybody knows that. well, did you know certain cartoon characters should never have an energy drink? action! blah-becht-blah- blublublub-blah!!! geico®. introducing the birds of america collection. fifty stunning, hand-painted plates, commemorating the state birds of our proud nation. blah-becht-blah- blublublub-blah!!! geico®. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. you got to stay in shape for all the costumes... what's that? you know like... ...attractive nurse princess warrior
1:26 am
...and foxy fullback can we go over the viking lady again? whatever you are staying fit for, start with a low fat subway sub like the tender turkey. subway. eat fresh. our most stretchable sheer bandage ever. bandages. they're 50% more stretchable, so they fit snug to protect even tough spots from dirt and germs. 'cause band-aid stretches with me! band-aid brand. we've got all your wound care needs covered.
1:27 am
break the ice, with breath freshening cooling crystals. ice breakers. and this is the new ♪this is iphone 6 plus. 6. they're the biggest iphones ever made. they're huge. yeah, but their size is just the beginning. even though they're huge. sure, sure. but they could change the way you see the world. oh, that is so huge. they could improve your health. huge! they're the biggest, most powerful iphones ever made. huuuuuuuggggeee! huuuuuuuggggeee! stop it, please. huuuuuuuggggeee! stop it... thank you. ♪ huge.♪
1:28 am
when i peel this sticker off the munchie meal, i have a 1 in 4 chance of winning cool prizes like flights on southwest airlines, skateboards, fandango movie tickets, neff gear, or free food you can eat, like a whole 'nother munchie meal. it's called jack's munchie peel instant win game and it's awesome. check this out. when i peel this banana, i win the inside of this banana. cool story, bro.
1:29 am
1:30 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: tonight's musical guest is a critically acclaimed and platinum-selling artist who won a grammy for her self-titled debut album. her sophomore effort came out this summer and she is here tonight to perform her hit, "kiss and not tell." please welcome, la roux. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ten thousand stories sent two lovers disguise you've seen the future now a love that is blind ♪ ♪ makes you want to kiss and not tell makes you want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ you've dialed that number now so where's the surprise ♪ ♪ temptations calling you a secret reply ♪ ♪ makes you want to
1:31 am
kiss and not tell makes you want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ all along i've had feelings i can't help makes me want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ ♪ you say in evidence they won't take you alive but when the sun goes down you cover your lies ♪ ♪ makes you want to kiss and not tell makes you want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ you like the elegance but it's weighing you down and sometimes you just need a night on the town, oh ♪ ♪ makes you want to kiss and not tell makes you want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ all along i've had feelings i can't help makes me want to kiss and not ♪
1:32 am
♪ and all i want is to come right out of my shell makes me want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ all along i've had feelings i can't help makes me want to kiss and not ♪ ♪ and all i want is to come right out of my shell
1:33 am
makes you want to kiss and not tell ♪ ♪ ♪ all along i feelings i can't feelings i can't help ♪ ♪ all i want is to come right out my come right out my shell ♪ ♪ all along i feelings i can't feelings i can't help ♪ ♪ all i want is to come right out my to come right out my shell ♪ ♪ all along i feelings i can't feelings i can't help ♪ ♪ all i want is to come right out my to come right out my shell ♪ ♪ makes me want to kiss and not all along said all along ♪
1:34 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: la roux. the album, "trouble in paradise", is available now. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ]
1:35 am
1:36 am
[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: my thanks to james spader, rachel dracht, le roux and of course the 8g band. stay tuned for carson daly. we'll see you tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ]
1:37 am
♪ ♪ >> carson: well hello there, and welcome to the latest installment of "last call" with me, carson daly. thanks for being here. we're at the queen of the night, which is at the paramount hotel in new york city, and here's tonight's line up. first, it's all about the music, get excited kids, because the indie darling's best co-star here with performances from the observatory in santa ana, california. our "spotlight" tonight is the story behind willis earl beal and the film "memphis," but right now, we're going to present one of the most recognizeable faces in film and tv, among his 140 plus credits, you know j.k. simmons from


info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on