tv Late Night With Seth Meyers NBC November 3, 2018 12:37am-1:38am PDT
>> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- ike barinholtz, star of "chilling adventures of sabrina," actress kiernan shipka, music from courtney barnett, featuring the 8g band with thaddeus dixon. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers ] that's fantastic to hear. in that case, let's get to the news. president trump told reporters
today that he gets along well with senator ted cruz saying, quote, he's not lying ted anymore, he's beautiful ted. dude, if that's beautiful ted, then you're lying donald. [ laughter ] president trump today blamed the mexican police and military for failing to stop a caravan of migrants from entering the u.s. adding, quote, i have alerted border patrol, and military that this is a national emergy. yeah, we can't have a bunch of people coming in who can't write in english. [ laughter ] we'd have to make them all president. [ laughter ] after "the new york times" [ cheers and applause ] we don't have that many open president jobs. after "new york times" reporter asked president trump what evidence he has that hardened criminals are trying to cross the u.s./mexico border, trump responded quote, oh please don't be a baby. which is incidentally the same thing he said while eric was being born.
[ laughter ] i was hoping for a watch. [ laughter ] in a new interview with "the washington post" president trump commented on white house senior advisor jared kushner's relationship with saudi crawn -- crown prince mohammad bin salman saying, quote, they are just two young people. they are the same age. they like each other, i believe. why do you always sound like you're being showing a rorschach test? [ laughter ] "they're just two young people they are the same age. their father hates them. i don't know." president trump held a campaign rally in texas today, and then he spent the rest of the day chasing a better toupee. [ wind blowing ] [ cheers and applause ]
former white house communications director anthony scaramucci will release a new book tomorrow titled "trump: the blue collar president." what? you worked there for ten days. [ light laughter ] that's like me releasing a book about my time in line at the dmv. [ laughter ] a zoo in california temporarily shut down last week after an antelope nicknamed taylor swift escaped from its enclosure. there will be an investigation into how she escaped, as well as into the creepy zoo keeper who named their antelope taylor swift. [ laughter and applause ] to help residents adjust to the legalized use of recreational marijuana, government officials in canada have set up a website offering step-by-step instructions on how to properly roll a joint. [ laughter ] step one, knock on your older brother's bedroom door. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
caroll spinney, the puppeteer behind big bird and oscar the grouch has announced that he's retiring from "sesame street." even sadder, the guy who plays mr. snuffleupagus' butt died in 2009 and no one noticed. [ audience aws ] he's sad too. officials in virginia last week seized 50 baby turtles from a person selling them in a burger king parking lot. it's the second weirdest thing ever sold at burger king. [ laughter ] and finally, a toddler at a chinese train station last week accidently climbed onto a baggage belt, and went through an x-ray scanner, which explains this x-ray. [ laughter ] ladies and gentleman, we have a fantastic show for you tonight. [ cheers and applause ]
from the new film, "the oath," ike barinholtz is back on the show. my dear friend. [ cheers and applause ] ike barinholtz. she is the star of netflix's "chilling adventures of sabrina." she's a fantastic actor. kiernan shipka is here tonight. and we have music from one of my favorites, courtney barnett. so you're here on an absolutely wonderful show tonight. before we get to that, the president openly celebrated violence against a reporter as saudi arabia lied about the death of a journalist. for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." ♪ [ cheers and applause ] tonight president trump traveled to texas to campaign for his former nemesis, senator ted cruz. trump, of course, famously called him lying ted during the 2016 campaign, but on his way to texas he was asked by reporters if he still felt that way, and he gave cruz a new nickname. >> is he no longer lying ted?
>> he's not lying ted anymore. >> what is he now? >> he's beautiful ted. [ audience ohs ] >> steve: no. no, you can call ted cruz a lot of things, but beautiful is not one of them. ted cruz once took a picture with a butter cow, and the only thing that looked like it was melting was ted cruz. [ laughter ] trump is pulling out all the stops for the midterms to try to avoid the impending blue wave. and the reason these midterms feel so tense is that right now millions of americans feel their democracy isn't working. republicans are illegally purging voters and gerrymandering districts. four justices on the supreme court have now been appointed by two presidents who lost the popular vote. and the most recent nominee was confirmed by a senate majority that actually represents fewer americans than in the senate minority. what we now have is a system that does the opposite of what the people want. it's like if lays let everybody vote on a new potato chip flavor, and a month later, they announced that the winner was fried liver and cilantro. [ light laughter ] you'd be like, "i think something might be wrong with the voting system." [ light laughter ]
people are angry that a minority faction is ruling the country and ignoring what most people want. and they have expressed that anger in various ways, like confronting politicians in public, or protesting in the capitol. and republicans have responded to that fury by calling their own constituents paid protestors. and claiming the left is practicing mob violence. >> when you have nothing to run on over the last two years, then you turn to something that is popular among the liberal mob on the left, right? violence. >> we will not be bullied by the screams of paid protesters, and name calling by the mob. >> the far left mob is not letting up. >> you don't hand matches to an arsonist. and you don't give power to an angry left-wing mob. and that's what they've become. >> the choice could not be more clear. democrats produce mobs. republicans produce jobs. >> seth: first of all, when trump finds a rhyme like mobs
and jobs, that's his gettysburg address. [ laughter and applause ] cause that's really. and you know he was up all night trying to crack that one. democrats produce mobs. republicans produce fobs? bobs -- [ laughter ] oh, jobs. [ cheers and applause ] second, you're accusing democrats of acting like a mob? because i can only remember one mob in recent history, and i'm positive they weren't democrats. democrats only use tiki torches to keep mosquitos away from their vegan barbecues. [ laughter and applause ] you guys are the ones who run the government like a protection racquet. republicans all look like they should be cracking their knuckles in a butcher shop, telling the owner, nice place you got here, would be a shame if something happened to it. [ light laughter ] if you took any photo of trump's
aides and added clemenza from "the godfather" no one would notice. [ laughter and applause ] they'd notice the hat. and then on friday, trump posted yet another one of his rose garden twitter videos where he again claimed democrats were an angry mob. >> the democrats don't like being called an angry mob, but really, that's what they've become. they've gone so far left, they can't even believe that they're over there. they don't know that's going on. they're losing it and they shouldn't be. >> seth: they're losing it? [ laughter ] you look like you just wandered out of those bushes, and made a stranger point a camera at you. it looks like a big foot video where big foot decided to try his hand at public speaking. [ laughter and applause ] me bigfoot. bigfoot friend. [ applause ] bigfoot friend. don't chase bigfoot.
so republicans are accusing the left of acting like a violent mob, meanwhile there are republicans who are literally violent, like montana congressman greg gianforte who plead guilty to physically assaulting a reporter last year when that reporter tried to ask gianforte a question about health care. and in case you forgot what that sounded like, he's the audio. >> you're waiting to make your decision about health care until you saw the bill and it just came out. >> we'll talk to you about that later. >> yeah, but there's not going to be time. i'm just curious -- >> okay. speak with shane, please. [ bustling sounds ] >> just -- i'm sick and tired of you guys. the last time you came in here, you did the same thing. get the hell out of here. >> man, it is amazing how often republicans get caught doing [ bleep ] things on tape. i mean, the congressman was taped body slamming a reporter. trump was taped discussing a payment to cover up an affair. and steven miller was taped eating his lunch in the white house basement. >> okay steven, time for your feeding. [ screams ] [ laughter and applause ] >> seth: so last week trump, trump. the law and order president went to montana to campaign for violent criminal
greg gianforte, and he made it clear that he is totally against political violence of any kind, unless it's a sick wrestling move, in which case, he thinks it's awesome. >> greg is smart. and by the way, never wrestle him. you understand? never. any guy that can do a body slam, he's my kind of -- [ cheers and applause ] he's my guy. >> seth: so trump says a congressman who body slammed a reporter is his kind of guy. let's not forget, trump also told his supporters to knock the crap out of protesters, and promised to pay their legal fees if they did. he's an actual crime boss. i mean, look at him. he sweats like he's being dangled off the side of a roof by batman. [ cheers and applause ] trump is the classic fake tough guy from queens. if he weren't president, he'd be the guy sitting on a park bench in flushing meadows saying, "who you looking at?" to the squirrels. [ laughter and applause ]
but trump's praise for gianforte is especially gross after the murder of "washington post" columnist and u.s. resident jamal khashoggi who disappeared after walking into the saudi consulate in istanbul three weeks ago, and yet on friday after a series of lies, and a sham investigation, the saudis released a truly absurd account of khashoggi's death. >> saudi arabia now publicly confirming that the saudi journalist and "washington post" contributor jamal khashoggi is dead in the middle of the night. and now it's been officials in riyadh said he died as a result of a physical altercation inside the saudi consulate. >> state prosecutors say the saudi writer, last seen walking into the consolate to get papers for his upcoming wedding, got into a fistfight inside that led to his death. >> seth: that's insane. they're claiming he got into a fistfight while he was trying to get paperwork for his wedding. the only time anyone has gotten into a fistfight over a wedding is on mtv's "true life: i'm getting married." >> do you have any [ bleep ] clue who you're talking to right now? besides the fact that it's my [ bleep ] wedding, i'll [ bleep ] cut you the [ bleep ] up. i will gut you like the
[ bleep ] piece of [ bleep ] that you are. do you understand? don't you [ bleep ] dare come up to me like that on my [ bleep ] wedding. because i'll hunt you down like [ bleep ] cattle, and i'll gut you. [ audience ohs ] >> seth: our show will never be as good as that show. [ laughter ] [ applause ] i mean, i would love to see him renting that tuxedo. i need a lot of room in my arms for angry walking! [ laughter and applause ] there's so many reasons not to believe this obvious lie. multiple suspects have direct links to the crown prince. even republicans in congress who are fierce allies of trump have called this explanation absurd. no one, and i mean no one is dumb enough to believe the saudi explanation. >> u.s. president trump says he believes the saudi explanation, calling it a good first step. >> seth: that's right, trump said the saudi explanation is credible. now, because he won't release his tax returns, we don't know exactly what trump's personal financial ties are to
saudi arabia. last week trump tweeted, "i have no financial interest in saudi arabia." so you can believe trump when he says he has no financial interest in saudi arabia, or you could take it from this guy. >> i love the saudis. many are in this building. saudi arabia, i get along great with all of them. they buy apartments from me. they spend 40 million, 50 million. am i supposed to dislike them? i like them very much. >> they give me money so i like them is the literal definition of a bribe. [ laughter ] trump can be so disorienting sometimes, because he just spells out in plain language why he's corrupt. he's like a guy who robbed a bank, telling the cops, "i pointed a gun at the teller, so he gave me the cash. what am i supposed to do? not take it?" [ laughter and applause ] so while pundits and republicans whine about civility. the president was celebrating violence against a reporter, and standing by the saudis. it's a protection racquet. if you pay them off, they'll protect you. there's even a word for that. it's called -- >> the mob. >> seth: this has been "a closer look." [ cheers and applause ]
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over there. [ cheers ] also joining us on drums this week, he's a platinum selling musician producer, and musician, and his new single "letters to my x's" is available now. please welcome back to the show thaddeus dixon, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] thanks for being here. so happy you're back. our first guest tonight is a very funny actor who you know from "the mindy project," and such movies as "sisters" and "blockers." he wrote, directed, and stars in the film "the oath" which is in theaters now. let's take a look. >> shame on all of you. >> now that's it. >> yeah, that it is it. that is it. that is it. >> that's it. >> you know what? i don't want to eat with you people. so, i'm going to take my food, and my wine. i'm going to go sit in my car in the driveway, and i'm going to listen to some news, and i'm going to read little articles on my phone, and eat my food, and you all can sit here at the table, and stuff your big fat [ bleep ] faces and talk about the people that are being brutally executed in the street by our police state. i'll be in the driveway. happy thanksgiving, mother [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> seth: please welcome back to the show, our very good friend
ike barinholtz, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ hi buddy. welcome back. >> what's up, my man? >> seth: you know i do -- >> thank you. whooo. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: yeah. get every piece of it. >> hello. >> seth: wow. >> i brought my -- my team from uca. they came. hi, everybody. hi, joe. >> seth: you know, us talk show hosts, we throw around good friend a lot, but you and i -- we've known each upwards of 20 years. we -- we are real, actual good friends. >> we are, and i have to come clean cause i messed up. >> seth: you messed up? >> yeah. >> what did you do bud? >> well, i was on the howard stern show. >> seth: uh-huh. >> and he asked me. he goes, "who are your best friends in show business?" and i said seth rogen. [ laughter ] and -- you know, five seconds after i said, "i meant seth meyers." >> seth: it took you five
seconds? >> yeah. [ laughter ] well, i was -- i was drinking. but i do want to go back, and be like, "no, not seth rogen. i meant seth meyers." because i'm also friends with seth rogen.e >> seth: yeah. >> much better friends with you. >> seth: right. >> i was at your wedding. >> seth: yeah. >> wasn't at seth's. >> seth: mm-mmm. >> would have loved to been. i didn't make the cut. >> seth: yeah. but you, i did. so, i want to say here and now that i'm closer friends with you than i am seth rogen. screw seth rogen. >> seth: i feel like you need to correct the record on stern next time you go on. that's what i'm going to -- >> well, he'll watch this, and that will serve as the correction. yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: there you go. hey man, congrats on this movie. >> thanks, baby. >> seth: we've talked about it already. it's so wonderful. you wrote it, you directed it, you star in it. >> yes. >> seth: and it is about -- it was inspired by the result of the 2016 election. >> yes, yes. this movie would not have been possible if hillary clinton was president. >> seth: yeah. so, thank you to donald trump. [ light laughter ] >> seth: yup. >> i appreciate it. thank you, sir. >> seth: he created jobs. he gave you -- he gave you a job. >> he created a job. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> he gave me a job. and he did. [ applause ]
my imitation -- i imitate trump, but i realize my imitation is just your imitation. it's just --- >> seth: amd it's a real c minus impression. >> yours? so, mines derivative of that. it's is like a d. look, he said "no, no, no." it's that. you know? >> seth: yeah. it's really -- it's -- i actually think it's really good. yeah. >> you really think it's good? >> seth: you look like you put a lot of thought into it. >> should i take it on the road? [ laughter ] but yeah, it was inspired by after the 2016 election. my mother, my brother, and i got into this huge fight after dinner about the election, and we started kind of pointing fingers, and we're saying things like, "it's your fault," which is crazy. [ laughter ] but i woke up the next day. i was like, "i have to write a movie about a family fighting at thanksgiving, and here we are. >> seth: and here we are. you mentioned your brother. your brother, john barinholtz is in the movie playing your brother, and he's fantastic as well. >> speaking of brothers, josh meyers is in this movie. >> seth: my brother is also in the movie. yeah. >> that's right. >> seth: there you go. >> that's right. >> seth: family affairs. [ cheers and applause ] >> there you go. keep it in the family, baby. >> seth: and you shot the film -- you shot it all in chatsworth, california? >> chatsworth,%california is
about 39 minutes north of l.a. >> seth: uh-huh. >> fun fact, the first film to be shot in chatsworth that wasn't pornography. >> seth: oh, wow. [ laughter ] >> i know. it's nice. right? >> seth: yeah. >> yeah, the mayor came. >> seth: oh, he must have been so happy. >> he gave us the key to the city and stuff, and it was crazy. i shot my movie where, you know, they shot, you know, "milf hunter 6." >> seth: oh, wow. [ laughter ] >> you know -- >> seth: what's their planet hollywood like? [ laughter ] >> you don't want to eat there. >> seth: yeah, yeah. >> and there's so many milf pornos. there's no dilfs. >> seth: no dilfs? [ laughter ] >> there's -- you may say the milf. the housewife. the milf, but you no ones like -- >> seth: that is how i talk about it. [ laughter ] the -- >> i guess i'm richard lewis. 1989. but there's no dilfs. like, i want to see like a, like a porno that starts off with a guy like, calling directv. "why can't i get the cowboys game? grrr, i'm so horny."
[ laughter ] i think i got my next movie. >> seth: you certainly have act one, yeah. >> you just need one act. >> seth: you do need one act. >> you just need one act. no one makes it past the second half of a porno. [ laughter ] i loved it. it's started off great. then in the second act i got real tired. [ laughter ] >> seth: you and i had the most wonderful trip because we met in amsterdam. we worked for a theater called boom chicago. >> yes, yes. >> seth: boom chicago had its 25th anniversary this summer. >> it did. >> seth: and so, which was great because i think only a 25th anniversary would our spouses allow us to go back to amsterdam. >> yeah. >> seth: and there's a bunch of us here. colton dunn, there's my brother josh, joe benjamin, josie o'reilly, liz cackowski. >> liz cackowski, good group. >> seth: how did you -- we were there for three days back in amsterdam. where we lived in our 20s. >> yeah, and it's very different living in amsterdam when your in your mid-20s than when your early 40s. >> seth: yeah. >> it's bad when you're early 40s because your body --- i don't know if you know this seth. your body changes as you get older. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> i don't know if you knew that. >> seth: yeah. >> i found it out, and you know,
when you're in your 20s, you can drink 20 beers. >> seth: yeah. >> i did that with you a couple months ago. >> seth: yeah cause you definitely -- you still have the head of a 20-year-old, my friend. [ laughter ] >> yeah, i do. yeah, i do. spiritually i'm 20. >> seth: yeah. >> physically i'm -- >> seth: your spirit animal is you at 20. [ laughter ] and my physical animal is remember buddy ebsen? from "the beverly hillbillies?" >> seth: yeah. >> yeah, that's -- that's who it is. >> seth: well i remember you and liz cackowski, who's a fantastic comedian, writer -- >> career writer. >> seth: you guys flew out together, and the pictures on the flight to amsterdam where you guys like yeah toast. >> yeah. >> seth: you were so happy. and then tell us about the flight home. >> the flight home, i don't remember it, but i remember turning to her dramatically in the lounge and going, "liz, i need to get on that plane." [ light laughter ] sounded like harrison ford in air force one, but the opposite. >> seth: yeah. >> yeah. and she was like, "all right, fine. don't worry about it." >> seth: now it should be noted that this is an early flight leaving amsterdam, and how much
had you slept? >> 0.0 hours. >> seth: okay, gothca. yeah. >> i laid in a park. [ light laughter ] >> seth: yeah, you fell asleep in a park for a second. >> yeah, but i put my hat out. i got a couple bucks. i bought a nice broodje at the airport. >> seth: dutch for sandwich. >> dutch for sandwich. [ laughter ] thank you. yeah, it was -- but then i woke up seven hours in, i felt great. >> seth: yeah. >> and then for two weeks i had depression. >> seth: uh-huh. >> and then i felt great. >> seth: oh, well, that's good. >> yes. >> seth: well, it was a great trip, and it was worth two weeks of depression. >> yeah, yeah yeah. no doubt. >> seth: it was -- your wife and my wife both very nice. i have two kids. you've had three now. >> three kids. yeah. >> seth: so, now i know halloween is coming up. are you guys enthusiastic about it? >> they are. the kids are. we're doing a "star wars" theme. >> seth: oh, that's great. >> yeah, it's great. rey, then my wife is leia, then the middle kid is yoda, and then the youngest is chewbacca. han solo, obviously. >> seth: uh-huh. [ laughter ] >> but i'm maybe han from "the force awakens." the kind of slower. "he always looked surprised."
[ laughter ] but yeah. >> seth: i'm glad you've gotten a lot of your harrison ford impression in tonight. [ laughter ] >> yeah, i guess you can open with your closer. but no. i'm not going to have anymore kids. i had a medical procedure. >> seth: oh, wow. >> yeah. >> seth: congratulations. >> yup. i found a guy on craigslist. [ laughter ] he just -- he came over and just kicked me in the nuts a bunch. >> seth: uh-huh. >> and -- >> seth: but you did actually have -- >> i did have the vasectomy. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> yeah, which -- >> seth: was everybody in the family in agreement? was erica behind the idea? >> it was erica's idea. >> seth: okay, gotcha. and i jumped on board. [ laughter ] it was kind of fine for the first, you know, three days i was like, "this is not a big deal." >> seth: this is after the fact? >> this is after the fact, and then the fact -- >> seth: okay. >> was that, i don't know how to say this. well, my -- it turned purple. >> seth: oh, wow. [ laughter ] >> now, i don't mean like, "oh, it was kind of purple."
i mean it was, you know grimace from mcdonald's? >> seth: sure. [ laughter ] if he had one, it would look indistinguishable. [ laughter ] so, i am the new face of mcdonald's. >> seth: wow. [ laughter ] congratulations. >> thank you. thank you. >> seth: you made -- you made lemonade, my friend. >> purple lemonade. >> seth: purple lemonade. >> yeah, it really hurt, and it was real scary for a minute. but i'm fine now. >> seth: gotcha. you're fine now. back to like, 60 percent purple, which is normal. >> seth: oh, that's great. >> that's normal for me. >> seth: oh, that was where you were at. that was your starting point. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: my god, you have so many great things going on right now. >> i've got a vasectomy. >> seth: you got a vasectomy. [ laughter ] you got the movie. >> you're going to be old han solo. >> you're gonna be old han solo. >> seth: buddy, it is always just such a pleasure to have you here. congrats again on the movie. it's really amazing. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: that's ike barinholtz, everybody. i'm his friend. "the oath" is in theaters now. we'll be right back with kiernan shipka. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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and same day delivery. target run & done. big corporations are making and just got a huge tax break. but the middle class is struggling. prop c is a common-sense plan. the top 1% of businesses pay their fair share to tackle homelessness for all of us. companies with revenue greater than $50 million pay, not small businesses or homeowners. the prop c plan is supported by the democratic party, nancy pelosi & dianne feinstein vote "yes" on c. big corporations pay for it, not you. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is a talented
actress you know best as sally draper from "mad men." she's currently starring in "chilling adventures of sabrina" which begins streaming in its entirety on netflix this friday. let's take a look. >> so i'm in the middle of getting this club started at school. >> club? what kind of club? >> women protecting women. you know, sort of like a coven. anyway, i was wondering if we could maybe, possibly postpone my baptism a little bit. >> postpone it? >> oh, dear. >> sabrina, you cannot postpone your 16th birthday. especially not when it falls on the eclipsing of a blood moon which only occurs once every 66 years. >> seth: please welcome to the show kiernan shipka, everyone. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> seth: how are you? [ cheers and applause ] >> hi! i'm so good. how are you? >> seth: good. it is so lovely to see you
again. >> good. >> seth: the first time we met my wife, and i were huge fans of you on "mad men." >> yes. >> seth: and we were at the emmys and we came over -- >> yes. >> seth: and introduced ourselves to you. >> yes. i did not know who you were. [ laughter ] to be fair i was probably -- probably 12 at the time. >> seth: yes. >> and then within the year, i started watching "snl" and you were my era of "snl." >> seth: well, that's very kind to hear. >> so -- >> seth: i will say that when we walked away, my wife said she definitely didn't know who you were. [ laughter ] >> you made a lasting impression, though. you guys were so nice. so -- >> seth: well, you did on my wife because you told my wife that you liked her dress. >> aw. >> seth: and so from that point on you were her favorite. >> so, we're good. >> seth: yeah, we're -- it all worked out. >> we're good now. >> seth: we're good, yeah. >> fantastic. that's why i'm here tonight. >> seth: by the way, that's my wife's favorite thing is that if you burn me and compliment her. >> uh-huh. >> seth: that, she is so happy. >> fantastic. [ laughter ] now i know. >> seth: now you know. >> now i know. yeah. >> seth: so congratulations on the show. >> thanks. >> seth: this actually takes the same creator as the show "riverdale." >> yep. >> seth: and takes place in the same universe. >> yep. >> seth: did you know that going in, that they were the same world? >> i did, yeah. i'm a big, big, big "riverdale"
fan. i had actually just binge watched it right before i got this meeting, very coincidentally, so i kind of had to keep my cool. >> seth: uh-huh. >> when i met roberto, the creator. but, yeah, i knew they were in the same universe and i think that's kind of exciting. >> seth: it's great. and then you guys also shoot in the same town. >> the same universe. yeah, exactly. >> seth: you do shoot in the same universe. >> five minutes away from there. >> seth: so you actually had an inter-cast softball game. >> we did. >> seth: where you played each other. >> we did. >> seth: so -- there are you at the softball game. >> yep. >> seth: so who won, "riverdale" or "sabrina?" >> so we won in spirit. >> seth: okay, that -- [ laughter ] that doesn't -- that doesn't sound great as far as the scoreboard. >> and "riverdale" crushed us. >> seth: now -- >> like -- but they had, like, tryouts. we on the other hand just kind of were getting everyone in there. >> seth: gotcha. >> seth: you know, having fun. and, i mean, they picked the best, most athletic people on that crew to go in, and just defeat us. >> seth: but do you feel when you came out of it, were your spirits still high? >> we were victorious. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> absolutely. >> seth: i like your attitude as far as that goes. >> completely.
it was a fun time. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: now -- >> yeah. there -- a fellow cast member who, of course, could not play in the softball game is -- >> yeah. >> seth: a big part of your show is your cat, salem. >> yeah. >> seth: and so you guys are obviously very close on the show. >> mm-hmm. >> are you guys close in real life? >> you know what? one of the few actors that i've not gotten along with -- >> seth: is salem. >> in my career is salem, the cat. >> seth: okay. >> truly it just -- i didn't expect to be allergic to cats. >> seth: oh, you had no idea? [ audience ohs ] >> no, idea whatsoever because -- >> seth: that's a weird and awful time to find out. [ laughter ] >> you know what, that still is actually like pretty much the exact moment that i found out when i brought the cat so close to my face, and then the next day i had hives everywhere beyond belief. >> seth: so how are you guys working around that, cause that's a problem? >> zyrtec, man. >> seth: oh, wow. >> i mean, honestly. [ laughter ] i, at this point, like, i should be sponsored by -- >> seth: yeah. >> an anti-histamine company. but the other thing, too, is if you look in the first two episodes, there are like two scenes because we shot them
simultaneously where i'm totally acting on benadryl, and maybe only i know that. [ laughter ] but it was a mistake to take it, but my face hurt so much. >> seth: yeah. >> and i was like, "uh, i got to do it. oh, no, i have four hours left of work." and i was slurring a little bit. >> seth: seems like they should have written cat out of the scenes more than just -- [ laughter ] >> i know, i know. >> seth: just drug you up. it feels like, yeah. >> yeah, it feels a little old school, right? >> seth: it does, very, yeah. >> yeah. >> seth: this is what they did at old hollywood. >> yeah, exactly. >> seth: "she's having a reaction. pump her full of drugs." [ laughter ] >> yeah. yeah. >> seth: you play a witch on the show obviously. >> yes. >> seth: spoiler alert. >> yeah. >> seth: and -- >> yeah. >> seth: but you also -- there are other sort of bits of spirituality in the show. is this something you've done? have you ever, for example, gone and seen a psychic? is that something you buy into? >> so i went to see a medium actually quite recently. >> seth: okay. >> and i -- >> seth: for you or for research? >> no, just for me. just for advice. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> for life stuff. >> i kind of -- i approach all that kind of stuff with a little skosh of skepticism. >> seth: sure. >> but i'm into it and i believe
it to a certain extent. i'm all about my crystals. i bought some crystals. >> seth: oh, wow. >> i cleansed them under a moon because that's what you're supposed to do for them to work. [ laughter ] >> seth: that's great. it seems like they should be pre-cleansed. >> i know. [ laughter ] well -- >> seth: with the money you pay for crystals these days. >> honestly, seriously, though. i was like -- now, they were like $5 crystals. they weren't anything crazy. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> so i took it upon myself to cleanse them. >> seth: have you ever heard anything -- did the medium -- has a psychic ever told you anything where you're like, "wow, that's --" >> so he told me i was going to have a great year. >> seth: okay. >> and i was like -- but if you just like, google the person quickly beforehand, maybe he could see that i, like, had a show coming out. >> seth: right. >> and he's like, "i think it's going to be a year of great success and change in your career." [ light laughter ] i was like, "hmm. what does that --" >> seth: "i'm seeing netflix." [ laughter ] >> "i'm seeing you on netflix." yeah. >> seth: i'm seeing a red "n." [ laughter ] >> yeah, exactly. >> seth: "if you do nothing, the next episode will start." >> yeah, exactly. so -- [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] yeah, basically.
>> seth: are you -- obviously, you know, again, we mentioned "mad men." >> yeah. >> seth: you were the youngest cast member on that show -- >> yeah. >> seth: by way. is it nice to be working with people who are your own age? >> now i know what the adults felt like on "mad men" all this time. >> seth: yeah. >> working with people my age. >> seth: yeah. >> i'm like, "this is what it was like." no, it's so fun. it feels kind of like a college dorm. >> seth: that's great. >> in a certain way. and it's super fun, and it's great. >> seth: considering based on "mad men" your, like, middle school dorm was a bunch of people drinking at an ad agency. >> exactly. >> seth: this is great. >> yeah, and smoking herbal cigarettes. >> seth: i think that you deserve -- >> yeah. >> seth: you deserve this. >> definitely. >> seth: this is very cool. you were on -- you had your own billboard in times square. >> i know. >> seth: and there are certain things that no matter what happens in your career that are really cool. >> yeah. >> seth: and so you actually went out, and you took a selfie of yourself with the "sabrina" billboard. >> yeah. >> seth: that's really cool. >> yeah. >> seth: how was that experience being out there, and seeing it, and taking the picture? >> it was not as effortless as that photo makes it out to be, to be quite honest. because it was one of the rotating billboards. >> seth: oh, a digital
billboard? >> a digital billboard. >> so it kept changing, and i kept just, like not getting the right moment. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. >> and, you know, it would flip to some, like, random, like ad for a golf club or something. [ laughter ] and i was like, "no, i want it to be --" and then i was there for such a long time trying to get the photo that people started looking at me, and just being like, "who is this girl, and what is she doing?" but once i got it -- >> seth: well, then it looks like a really desperate attempt to be recognized. >> exactly. [ laughter ] >> seth: "oh, my god, you guys, i can't time it out with that billboard." >> "oh, my god." yeah. [ laughter ] exactly. basically. [ applause ] >> seth: well, you nailed it. >> yeah. thank you. thank you. >> seth: and it is so great to see you again. >> it's nice to be here. >> seth: congrats on everything. i really appreciate it. >> thank you. >> seth: kiernan shipka, everybody. "chilling adventures of sabrina" begins streaming in its entirety on netflix this friday. we'll be right back with more "late night." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪
happy birthday to you... arrgh!!! ♪ ooh, let's get a group photo. ready? aah! (chuckling) ♪ aaw! i did not catch that. ♪ you and me can't have it all ♪ you and i again one two three...cheeese! waah! (dog barks) ♪ let me try again ♪ ♪ let me try again i'm always going to be a maker. and i think a company is the coolest thing you can build.
i'm adam, and i make robots. you never know when inspiration is going to strike. so i take my surface pro everywhere. part of an entrepreneur's job is to get stuff done. i like to do, like, four things at once. the new surface pro can handle all of my programs. i can paint, i can mold, i can code. i have it on all the time, it's fantastic. we get to build toys for kids and change the world. it's a big deal. you sleep in your bed and i sleep in...les.
someone and you'll think, "wow, that's a great take on that issue." and then other times someone will say something and you'll think, "i don't agree with that take, but it's interesting." and then sometimes you'll hear something and you'll just be like, "no, you're wrong. that's the wrong take." [ laughter ] so please enjoy some of these. this is "the wrong take." ♪ >> the wrong take. >> i could never bake a cake for a gay couple. i don't own an oven. >> the wrong take. [ laughter ] >> if you build it, they will come. assuming what you build is a porno theater. [ laughter ] >> the wrong take. >> mitch mcconnell is so [ bleep ] hot. >> the wrong take. [ laughter ] >> serena williams needs to watch her mouth. if she doesn't brush twice a day, she could get gingivitis. [ laughter ] >> the wrong take. >> i think everyone should be vegan. animals aren't for eating. they're for making love to.
[ audience oh ] [ laughter ] >> the wrong take. >> i don't think bert and ernie are gay. i think they just ran out of options. >> wrong take. [ laughter ] >> it's time we stop using plastic straws. it's so much easier to snort coke with a dollar bill. [ laughter ] >> the wrong take. >> how come when jewish people get off from work, it's called a holiday, but when i get off at work, i get called a pervert and fired? [ laughter ] >> the wrong take. >> we should be saving the whales, but we shouldn't be shaving the whales. they should have big, beautiful, bushy beards, like this. [ laughter ] >> wrong take. >> i'm against fracking. we're all adults here. just say [ bleep ]. >> the wrong take. ♪ >> seth: we'll be right back with music from courtney barnett. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪
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monitor their blood glucose every day. which means they have to stop. and stick their fingers. repeatedly. today, life-changing technology from abbott makes it possible to track glucose levels. without drawing a drop of blood, again and again. the most personal technology, is technology with the power to change your life. life. to the fullest. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: she's a grammy-nominated musician whose latest album "tell me how you really feel" was released to critical praise. performing "crippling self-doubt and a general lack of confidence," please welcome courtney barnett. [ cheers and applause ]
♪ ♪ ♪ well they say whoever pays the piper calls the tune oh let's avoid the truth make you all feel special ♪ ♪ and your desperation stinks i can smell it on your breath ♪ ♪ a certain absolut anosmic got yourself to blame for this ♪ ♪ tell me how you really feel i don't know i don't know anything ♪ ♪ i don't owe i don't owe anything i don't know i don't know anything ♪ ♪ i don't owe i don't owe anything ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ your opinion means a lot
well tell me what's the use ♪ ♪ i never feel as stupid as when i'm around you and indecision rots like a bag of last ♪ ♪ week's meat and i guess it's hard to keep everybody happy ♪ ♪ tell me how you really feel i don't know i don't know anything ♪ ♪ i don't owe i don't owe anything i don't know i don't know anything ♪ ♪ i don't owe i don't owe anything ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ tell me how you really feel i don't know i don't know anything ♪
♪ i don't owe i don't owe anything i don't know i don't know anything ♪ ♪ i don't owe i don't owe anything ♪ ♪ ♪ i don't know i don't know anything i don't owe i don't owe anything ♪ ♪ i don't know i don't know anything i don't owe i don't owe anything ♪ ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: courtney barnett, everyone. "tell me how you really feel" is out now. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ]
the prop c plan is supported by the democratic party, nancy pelosi & dianne feinstein vote "yes" on c. big corporations pay for it, not you. "look what she's accomplished... she authored the ban on assault weapons... pushed the desert protection act through congress, and steered billions of federal dollars to california projects such as subway construction and wildfire restoration." "she... played an important role in fighting off ...trump's efforts to kill the affordable care act." california news papers endorse dianne feinstein for us senate. california values senator dianne feinstein