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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  October 1, 2020 11:34pm-12:36am PDT

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quick and speedy recovery for the president of the united states. we will be following this story through the overnight hours and of course into our morning newscast, our twitter @nbcbay area is a great resource for the changing news. our other top story this evening, the difficult firefight under way in wine country. new video from the fire lines just showing the wind as a big concern. jeff joins us with a final recap. actually, we'll get to jeff a bit later on tomorrow as well. but we do know the wind is coming in, which could be very problematic in the overnight hours. thanks for being with us tonight. we'll see you tomorrow. >> steve: from rockefeller center, in the heart of
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new york city, it's "the tonight show" starring jimmy fallon tonight join jimmy and his guests - michael che and colin jost kaitlyn dever. musical guest bts and featuring the legendary roots crew and now here's your host, jimmy fallon ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. hello, everyone. thank you for so much for tuning in. welcome to "the tonight show," everybody. let's get to the news and jokes. well guys, after two days of controversy today president trump finally did the right thing and forcefully rejected white supremacy. take a look. [ tone ] [ laughter ]
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>> jimmy: i'm kidding. he hasn't done that at all and as a result, republicans are distancing themselves from the president. the president's debate performance has sparked a torrent of criticism that even his most ardent allies have struggled to contain. and republicans on capital are hill are now distancing themselves from the president after he fail to disavow a a far-right fascist group. >> jimmy: it's been six month of a pandemic and now the republicans are distancing yup, they're really trying to distance themselves from trump's white supremacy issue. in fact, today mitch mcconnell brought a bill to the floor to bring back the source awards [ laughter ] yeah, republicans said this as the last straw then tomorrow they'll be like "oh, we found a bunch more straws." turns out all of the controversies are causing the president's biggest supporters to experience trump fatigue.
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i think it might be true today when trump called into fox and friends, steve doocy was like, "ugh, just let the machine get it." [ laughter ] "we will ever talk for 45 minutes it just said -- what did say? [ indiscernible how do you get away from trump though it's like dealing with a bear. do you run do you act big do you play dead no one knows [ laughter ] that's right republicans are finally stepping up to say it's not okay to publicly support white supremacy more than seven or eight times, tops. eight is -- eight is enough. [ laughter ] well earlier today, john roberts from fox news try to give the white house a chance to clear things up and denounce white supremacy, but press secretary kayleigh mcenany had a tough time with that watch this >> just to clear it up this morning, can you, naming it, make a declare and say that that you -- that the president denounces it >> i just did. the president has denounced this repeatedly. the president was asked it you're making -- you're
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contriving a story >> no i'm not. >> jimmy: yeah, trump's like some sort of mythical troll. you got to ask the same question three times before you get the answer you're looking for. "there's only one way to reveal the answer, say the question, but in reverse." [ laughter ] the only way their gonna condemn white supremacy is if you sneak it into trump's teleprompter the way you sneak medicine into a dog's food "and then we're gonna -- i do not support white supremacists bring back football. [ laughter ] after that exchange, roberts didn't hold back how he was feeling. this is real take a look at this. >> for all of you on twitter who are hammering me for answering that --- for asking that question, i don't care because it's a question that needs to be asked and clearly the president's republican colleagues a mile away from here are looking for an answer for it, too. so, stop deflecting. >> okay -- >> stop blaming the media. i'm tired of it. [ laughter ]
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[ applause ] >> jimmy: even fox news is fed up with trump. that's like hdtv telling the property brothers to take their tight jeans and near beards and beat it. [ laughter ] >> tariq: near beards. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i hope that becomes a thing, man after monday's tax bombshell, tuesday's debate debacle and wednesday's white supremacy disaster, trump seemed pretty down at last night's rally ♪ ♪ young man there's no need to feel down stay at the ymca ♪ [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's actual audio. that's real clapping, pointing, and drawing a circle with you finger [ laughter ] one, two, three. it's fun to stay - ♪ ymc ymca they got everything ♪
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♪ making boys to me everything tha a man could be ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: opponents forcefully rejected trump trump is in so much debt pretty soon he will be staying at the ymca after that it's clear if the presidency doesn't work out, neither about dancing with the stars. the crowd was having fun let's make it a dance hop. ♪
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>> jimmy: everyone is still talking about the debates except for rudy giuliani who is talking about the de-bat rudy might be right. i don't think you can legally call what happened a debate. not sure where rudy was going with this. either he has something to say about the debate or he is looking for a d-battery. we are still on the air. giuliani quickly noticed and followed up with a oops, my bat. afraid of the last letter. the guy is doing trump's debate and can't spell debate
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like getting a text from your surgeon saying i can't wait for your surgery there has been clark over how to handle cruise lines >> the cdc is extending its ban on u.s. ports through the end of the month the cdc director wanted to extend it through the end of february, but vice president pence overruled him. even the cruise ships know it's a bad idea if it's a six-day trip they tell you to pack for nine months this might explain the new ad. >> are you ready to get out of your apartment, tired of your same old pandemic routine? join us for a carnival cruise. >> what? >> dive into a pool of kids swimming with diapers.
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share a mike at a karaoke lounge >> is this a trap? >> carnival cruise, just a few months away from setting sail. ireland supreme courts says that the bread served at restaurants can't legally be called breadth -- bread. subway adds sugar to its bread >> jimmy: after the ruling, subway said at least they didn't say anything about the meat and they said by the way, stop calling my guy who makes sandwiches an artist
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what is going on with ireland that that made it to the highest court? ireland is arguing over sandwiches can we live there. next on the docket is are taco bell's tacos actually tacos? that's my irish restaurant can you do the irish restaurant do it. >> taco bells aren't tacos >> jimmy: it's not irish i don't know who you sound like do it but run out of breath. >> jimmy: i'm not a dial up coach. i apologize.
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>> your irish accent finds sounds more jamaican >> jimmy: is that real jerk chicken there? >> i love it >> jimmy: i saw that a company in the uk is working on a way to speed up paramedics response time >> the paramedic with the medical kit could quickly respond. the suit has two engines on each arm and one on the back >> jimmy: right now that guy is currently covering over 50 carnival cruise trips. it's quick all paramedics have to do is get in the suit, put on the gloves and jet pack, and slowly fly over there is a second paramedic traveling behind for when first one crashes.
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we know jet packs never fail >> jimmy: police in louisiana arrested a man after he went swimming in the asquarium at a a bass pro shop. employees said they would have gotten him out if only there was fishing gear nearby. >> jimmy, jimmy, jimmy a guy swimming in a bass pro shop aquarium, and that's the best you got >> jimmy: what, you think you can do better? >> damned right. >> jimmy: colin jost, too? >> well, you know what this means. it's time for a good old-fashioned tonight show jokeoff!
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>> i think we all know the rules. one more time. police in louisiana arrested a a man after he went swimming in the aquarium at a bass pro shop go >> weirdly, he was charged with being too sober for a guy at a a bass pro shop. >> even worse, he wore his facemask as a banana hammock >> the guy wasn't in jail very long it was more of a catch and release. >> move over bass pro shop aquarium is now the saddest pixar film >> meanwhile seaworld was like for 50 bucks you can do whatever >> they were able to catch him by baiting the hook with a a little more crap
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>> jimmy: time for round two here's the next story. a 94-year-old virginia man received permission from wrigley's to be buried in a casket shaped like a giant pack of juicy fruit. go >> the man plans to be buried on the underside of a middle school desk. >> permission, what are they going to do, kill him? >> jimmy: at first the man's family loved the idea, but then quickly realized it was tasteless. >> right now there's a a carpenter taking measurements with a roll of bubble tape >> so in 1,000 years, archaeologists will still wonder what the hell the fruit flavor is supposed to be >> jimmy: and here to read the eulogy off a giant wrapper is bazooka joe! [ bell rings ] >> jimmy: all right, final round. here's the last story.
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after 43 years, chuck e. cheese announced they've filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy. go >> you came in hot, man with the beeps. >> so -- >> jimmy: it doesn't say so. >> beep. so there might be some flaws in the business model of a business that sells rats to children >> jimmy: okay, but before you close, i think my kid is still in your ball pit somewhere >> which i think means that in 2024 chuck e. cheese will be president of the united states >> jimmy: that was jokeoff, give it up for colin jost and michael che! stick around, more tonight show after the break.
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♪ dy-na-na-na, na-na, na-na,eh ♪ ♪ dy-na-na-na, na-na, na-na, ♪ ♪ eh dy-na-na-na, na-na, na-na, ♪ ♪ eh light it up, dynamite ♪ shining through the city with a little funk and soul ♪ ♪ so i'ma light it up like dynamite ♪ ♪ 'cause, ah-ah, ♪ ♪ shining through the city with a little funk and soul ♪ ♪ i'm a light it up like dynamite, whoa ♪ ♪ shining through the city with a little funk and soul ♪ hey guys want to stack different pringles flavors to create new flavor combos? here i'll... go first. pizza, barbeque and ja-lapeño. the spicy barbecue pizza stack. get him! grandpa what's going on? they must have taken us in our sleep.ial, i'm looking for my client.s i'm so sorry. accountant. [ sighs ] hey! hey man! you're here. you don't trust me here is vegas, do you? well... i thought we had a breakthrough
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♪ try my $4 mini munchies with marinara or ranch. back at jack in the box. >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody.
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bts has been on the show all week and we are glad to have them tonight i'll be facing off against bts in a game of zoom olympics, and we've got another exclusive music performance to close out the show it's going to be good! the groundhog challenge. >> go! [ laughter ] [ bell ]
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>> go! [ laughter ] >> go! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: stop my god >> go! [ laughter ]
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>> announcer: rm wins. round two. tv remote balance. whoever balances the most tv remotes in one hand wins >> go! >> jimmy: here we go 13 seconds 10 seconds my gosh! hurry up >> you are such a cheater. >> announcer: rm versus gin. >> go!
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>> here we go. keep going you have four seconds, three seconds, two, one second, go >> jimmy: rm is the winner >> announcer: rm wins. final round guitar pick challenge. each player takes an acoustic guitar with a handful of picks inside whoever shakes out the most wins >> go! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is great, man hurry up let's count up how much each player got
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>> one, two, three, four -- 49 >> 47! >> jimmy: the winner by two picks. and the winner is. >> jimmy: my thanks. stick around we have more come on back knowing who we are is hard. it's hard. eliminate who you are not first, and you're going to find yourself where you need to be. ♪ the race is never over. the journey has no port. the adventure never ends, because we are always on the way. ♪ ♪
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♪ >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. i am here in studio with michael che and colin jost [ cheers and applause
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i say we're back, we're here with -- we'll get you -- ♪ >> jimmy: my first guests are the co-anchors of weekend update on "saturday night live," which returns this saturday, with host chris rock and musical guest megan thee stallion let me introduce, please, michael che. >> yeah. >> jimmy: he's also a "new york times" best-selling author please welcome colin jost, everybody! ♪ michael che and colin jost ♪ sit on down and talk to the host ♪ ♪ go the distance, you will sit ♪ >> jimmy: ah, thank you for being here this is fantastic. >> thanks for having us, man >> yeah, cool. >> jimmy: thank you for being our first two-person in-studio guest, you know? i'm sorry. colin, i'm sorry you, i, do you, do you feel far away i am farther away.
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i'm a lot farther away >> jimmy: yeah, this is protocol and all that stuff, so, can you -- >> i can't hear anything you say. >> jimmy: thank you for coming on the show, appreciate it >> any time, man >> new normal! >> jimmy: this is the new 30 rock i saw you at the tests, when we were doing the nose swabs. how's it like working six feet apart from everybody >> i love it, i owe a lot of people, nobody can get it from me >> jimmy: just enough apart. >> it's perfect. >> jimmy: are they making changes to 8h? what's happening >> haven't really been in yet and seen what it is, right we had a table read. >> jimmy: what was that like >> well, we have 20 cast members in our show right now, and they have to be six feet apart. so 20 times six is like a thousand
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and you're hearing voices and you're like, "who said that" it's a great time for crew to yell stuff, because people are like, i guess they're in the cast it's fine. >> it's like listening to a podcast. you don't see anybody. it's great it's kind of cool. >> jimmy: what will the audience look like >> what are you guys talking about over there >> jimmy: we're talking about "saturday night live"! coming back this weekend what is the audience going to be like? >> white >> jimmy: no, no >> to start with, they're all white. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: everybody enjoys that show, but is it going to change the style for "update" >> it's a maximum capacity of one at the desk. >> jimmy: congratulations, jost >> as long as i get paid, it's fun.
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i think it's actually more fun rules make comedy fun. when there's things you can't do, when there's kind of loopholes, that's when you start to get really creative, and i think the show is the perfect place for that >> that was like the political answer >> jimmy: no, i agree with you i love rules >> i love rules. >> jimmy: yeah, because i like to break them. tell me what to do, i'll find a way around it. you have the first show for the time back, and the guest is chris rock you had to go to his house to convince him >> yeah, we literally will to go to chris rock's house to convince him to do snl it seems like the scene in the godfather, you know when tom hagen goes, i never saw the godfather, but someone told me it was similar i might have got bad information, jimmy
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>> jimmy: tom hagen. >> literally, you've got to do it, man. it's 30 rock, you got to come home and make people, you know, feel good again. >> jimmy: the country needs it i will be watching it. i cannot wait. more with colin jost and michael che when we come back. ♪ i said ooh, yeah think we will make it in time? ♪ ♪ you may not expect the unexpected, but you can certainly take it on. the lexus es wow, this rain is bananas. now available with all-wheel drive. experience amazing at your lexus dealer. amazon prime day is back! on october 13th and 14th, get two days to save big
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switch and save up to $400 a year on your wireless bill. with the carrier rated #1 in customer satisfaction. call, click, or visit your local xfinity store today. ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. i am here in studio with michael che and colin jost [ cheers and applause i say we're back, we're here with -- we'll get you -- >> i thought we were going to switch seats during the commercial >> i thought it wouldn't be good [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he made the decision a lot of things have happened since -- first of all, thanks again for coming in.
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colin, really, thank you since you guys have helped me out with the shows in quarantine, you zoomed in, i appreciate you doing that. since you've been on, colin, your book went to "the new york times" bestseller list congrats >> thank you [ cheers and applause ♪ he is a "new york times" best-selling author. don't you ever forget it [ laughter ] >> big deal. >> jimmy: how's the house? because we were talking about you bought a house last time >> i did buy a house >> ah-ha >> it's not a competition. i mean >> i haven't moved in yet, because apparently, it takes a a long time to close i didn't know this usually, where i go to live, it's an apartment, and you give the money. and then they give you a key end of transaction now with a house you have to like wait, they have to make sure that everything's up to code i don't know about any codes i've got to get a lawyer they have to take down a shed. it's annoying. it's a mess.
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>> jimmy: the shed wasn't up to code >> the shed wasn't up to code. they took it down. i'm just going to put it back up as soon as they leave [ laughter ] >> i cannot believe that there is a code for sheds. >> there's a code for sheds. >> i have never seen a shed and thought "that looks up to code." [ laughter ] >> it's an outside closet, man give the shed a break. >> jimmy: i'm so happy that chris is there, chris rock hosting. do you have chris rock stories >> i remember being backstage at the --at the -- when they did the benefit after hurricane sandy, they did it at madison square garden, i was there with bobby moynihan, we were going to do a bit where he was drunk uncle. so we're waiting backstage it's all huge musical acts, right? the who, rolling stones. we're waiting to go on, and chris rock wanders over and he's like, hey, guys, how's it going? we're like, good he goes, the who's on now, and then rolling stones are going to go on, and then between that, they're going to send you guys out there [ laughter ]
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-- to do a comedy bit. is that what's happening and suddenly, we're like, yeah [ laughter ] yeah, that's what's happening. he's like, hey, best of luck [ laughter ] he goes, i'll tell you something, i'll be watching. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm definitely not going out there. > my story's not as good >> your story's great. >> it's a silly story but one time i was doing "top five." he had a movie "top five." and i got to meet rosario dawson for the first time, and i was smitten. and i remember her talking to me, she was so nice to me, and she was like, you look so familiar, do i know you from somewhere? and i was like, i don't think so and she was like, are you sure have we never met? and i was like, i don't think we've ever met and i just hear chris rock on the other side of the hall going "you're not sure if you've met rosario dawson? [ laughter ] and i was like, i know i've never met her. have you met beyonce [ laughter ]
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how do you not know if you've met rosario dawson >> jimmy: he is unbelievable i loved him so much. and then jim carrey is going too, maybe >> yeah. you talked to him personally >> it seems like it's possible there was a debate >> jimmy: there was a debate oh my god. >> seems like it got pretty good reviews >> jimmy: colin did not get good reviews at all. >> i haven't read all the reviews yet but some of the ones i saw were -- >> jimmy: jim carrey playing joe biden. >> yes >> jimmy: that would be amazing. maya rudolph doing kamala harris. it's all a possibility you don't want to say anything you can't spoil it >> never know. >> jimmy: that wouldn't be fun >> we can't spoil who wins [ laughter ] can't spoil it >> could be carrey, could be sinbad >> jimmy: sinbad sinbad's not playing joe biden >> i don't know! i've heard things. i heard some things. people been talkin'. >> jimmy: it's going to be awesome. it is saturday night it is live it is on nbc best of luck, break a leg. i know you guys are brilliant
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and you've got to go up and write some funny stuff so thanks so much for taking time, coming here and thanks for being live on behalf of everyone, doing that for us. michael che, colin jost. "saturday night live" returns this saturday, that's right. on nbc with host chris rock and musical guest megan thee stallion. we'll be right back with kaitlyn dever. stick around, everybody. ♪ our focus is raising the girls. being able to order stuff online -
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go go go on a real vacation. visit go rving.com or your nearest rv dealer. go go "goldwe believe intriana good we can all afford. ♪ sing it, yeah, yeah from make believe made for everyone. ♪ all gold to ♪e to a t-shirt that means the world. yeah, good to me ♪ ♪ dy-na-na-na, na-na, na-na, ♪
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♪ eh dy-na-na-na, na-na, na-na, ♪ ♪ eh light it up, dynamite ♪ shining through the city with a little funk and soul ♪ ♪ so i'ma light it up like dynamite ♪ ♪ 'cause, ah-ah, ♪ ♪ shining through the city with a little funk and soul ♪ ♪ i'm a light it up like dynamite, whoa ♪ test
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♪ >> jimmy: my next guest is a a talented actress who can you see in the movie "coastal elites" which out now on hbo and hbo max. she's also in the new series "monster land", which premieres tomorrow on hulu here is kaitlyn dever. hi, caitlyn! >> hello, jimmy! >> jimmy: nice to meet you over zoom >> i know. it's so nice to meet you this is so cool, this is so cool for me. i've been a huge fan of yours for a long time. so, this is insane >> jimmy: this is rad, i'm a a fan of yours as well i know you're busy prepping for the film version of "dear evan hanson." >> i can't even yell you, jimmy, i lterally cannot describe to you how excited i am i think i've only had three musical auditions in my whole life, and "evan hanson" was one of them. so, it feels insane that i'm going to be a part of that i've always wanted to do a a musical. >> jimmy: how did the other two auditions go
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not so good? >> well, not so good, but they were okay. >> jimmy: i had the worst audition ever in the history of the business i auditioned to be on broadway to be frankenstein >> on broadway >> jimmy: dude, it was, i'll never forget it, i'm honestly getting, i'm about to vomit right now. because i remember going to an apartment -- i'm not going to say who was who was casting me, but the piano player was there, and i go, i'm just going to sing "puttin' on the ritz. i go, "yeah i can do it. if uo're blue and you --." i go, "got it. i get there and they go, "yeah, we don't want to hear that song, we want to hear this new song." and i go "oh, here's where i get busted because i'm not a real actor or a singer." and it was so bad. everyone felt so bad in the room it was awful and i remember, i was so embarrassed when i went home and it was cold, it was december, and there was steam coming off of my body. that's how embarrassed i was it's like a block of - >> my other, my other musical audition, that's exactly the same thing that happened to me
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they're like, "oh, yeah, no, you're singing in the wrong key, it's actually several keys higher than what you have come in to sing." so, it was like, "oh, great, i don't have that prepared." >> jimmy: well, i mean, you're in a band with your sister, maddie >> yes >> jimmy: you're called, is it "beulah belle? >> yes >> jimmy: you just released a new song "being you. it's awesome congratulations on that. >> thanks, jimmy >> jimmy: but that wasn't your first band with your sister, apparently >> it, it was not. we used to be called "hot pink." which, i think is a great name, and i don't know why we changed it >> jimmy: this is bizarre, but we actually talked to some people and got unseen footage from an early performance of yours. check out you on guitar, this is pretty awesome. ♪
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>> jimmy: oh, my gosh! >> the commitment i had to, i think i remember telling my self, i need to get down on my knees and really get into it, and then i quickly got up. i was not down on the ground, i got up so fast >> jimmy: you rocked that is one of the coolest things hey, i want to talk about your projects because you have so many besides "dear evan hanson. you have a movie out now on hbo and hbo max called "coastal elites." how did you get in that? >> i got a call from jay roach, who's the director, and he asked me to play the nurse there's all these five separate monologues about all of these diffeent characters talking about their frustration about the current state of the world, and he asked me to be in it. and dan levy, and sarah paulson and eason, and i was just sort of like, "are you sure
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this is a lot of pressure. but it was really incredible to be able to shoot something in quarantine it was wild. >> jimmy: it's really a cool thing to watch it's great you also have a new series on hulu called "monster land. it premiers tomorrow how would you describe this one? >> "monster land" sort of follows several characters, we folow, sort of these broken and troubled people who are forced to sort of cope with the darkest parts of themselves, and i play a young girl named toni who is a mother to a 4-year-old girl. and she's also trying to cope with just, my character is just trying to cope with her inner monster as well, and it's the first time i have ever played a mom in my life and it was also the first time i did a cajun french a which is as difficult as it sounds
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>> jimmy: yeah >> yeah. >> jimmy: you knocked it out of the park here's caitlyn dever in "monster land", take a look at this >> my name is alex >> where are you from, alex? >> nearby. >> you liein' already. >> why do you assume that i'm lying? >> cause you ain't talkin' flat folks here sound like they got the letter "g" away from the alphabet >> i'm here doing a job. >> oh, sure. then you better heal up and make a straight story, because trouble don't make pay date. >> well, i'm no trouble. >> yeah, and i'm the queen of sheba. >> jimmy: my thanks to caitlyn dever. "coastal elites" is on hbo and hbo max now. and "monster land" premiers tomorrow on hulu thank youso much again for coming out, kaitlyn.
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i appreciate it. >> thank you, jimmy. thanks for having me this is awesome. >> jimmy: we'll be right back with another amazing performance from bts come on back ♪
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♪ here's the very model ♪ ♪ of a modern daily family meal ♪ ♪ when food ideas are scarce ♪ and everything becomes a big ordeal ♪ ♪ you want something nutritious ♪ ♪ that your family will devour ♪ but add one thing that's healthy... ugh ♪ ♪ the taste will overpower so... ♪ ♪ only lightlife can return the balance ♪ ♪ to your every dish ♪ our food is always made of plants ♪ ♪ and it is totally delish ♪ 'cause nobody's ingredients ♪ ♪ are quite as simple clean or real ♪ ♪ lightlife is the model ♪ of a modern daily family meal ♪ lightlife. try a clean plant-based burger for a change.
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♪ >> jimmy: performing the song "mikrokosmos" from their hit album, "map of the soul: persona," here is bts. ♪ [ singing in foreign language
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[ singing in foreign language ♪ ♪ let us shine [ singing in foreign language ♪ oka let's go you got me ♪ [ singing in foreign language ♪ i got you [ singing in foreign language
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♪ hey [ singing in foreign language ♪ world [ singing in foreign language ♪ let us shine [ singing in foreign language ♪ one [ singing in foreign language ♪ oka let's go you got me ♪ [ singing in foreign language
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♪ i got you [ singing in foreign language ♪ hey [ singing in foreign language ♪ hey [ singing in foreign language ♪ you got me [ singing in foreign language ♪ i got you [ singing in foreign language
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♪ let's go [ singing in foreign language >> love you! [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: my thanks to michael che, colin jost, kaitlyn dever, bts, and the roots. thank you all for watching and susan stroman, if you're watching♪ puttin' on the ritz ♪ ♪ different types of wear all day coat pants ♪

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