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tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  October 2, 2020 12:36am-1:36am PDT

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oh, i switched them. oh no, i'm tightening up can you get my epipen, james don't be a dick, james just do it, james. i need it in the butt, just straight up the whazoo oh, this you won't do, james ♪ let's go [ singing in foreign language after everything, this is the line you won't cross oh, the great james bond." so trump claimed his opponent was -- was the one who was senile and needed drugs to get through the debate and then the debate happened and trump not only couldn't keep his mouth shut, but when it was his turn to speak, he said stuff like >> love you! this >> insulin, it's going - [ cheers and applause it was destroying families, destroying people because i'm getting it for so cheap, it's >> jimmy: my thanks to michael che, colin jost, kaitlyn dever, bts, and the roots. like water thank you all for watching and susan stroman, if you're you know, in europe, they live - they're forest cities. watching♪ they're called forest cities the car has gotten so expensive because they have computers all over the place >> seth: he sounds like a first time film student writing a sci-fi script in a starbucks "open on, moon base alpha puttin' on the ritz ♪ nestled in a forest city, insulin flows like water ♪ different types of wear the sky is filled with flying cars, which are expensive all day coat pants ♪ because they have computers all
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♪ with stripes and cut away over the place." coats for perfect fits puttin' on the ritz ♪ maybe trump should stick to interrupting when he actually has to answer a question, he sounds like the ♪ dressed up like a worst member of your taboo team. million dollar trooper trying hard to loo "it's a movie, they live in like gary cooper ♪ forest cities, computers all ♪ super-duper over the place [ buzzer ] it was 'star wars', but it's not ♪ my fault i wasn't allowed to say star or wars." even's trump's own campaign acknowledged privately that he went full psycho at the debate >> one person who's familiar with his debate prep, anderson, said ♪ >> announcer: tonight, on they prepared him to be "late night with seth meyers" -- aggressive but not to be jason cecily strong, from "friday the 13th," and that author of "the captain," former is the perception of how his performance was. mlb all star, david wright writer and director of >> seth: yeah. "kajillionaire," miranda july, i mean, even jason didn't interrupt that much unless you featuring the 8g band with were a sexy teen taking a shower jessica berdeaux jason's whole thing was that he and now, seth meyers was invulnerable and had super human strength >> seth: good evening. trump always looks like he just i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. climbed a ladder to get wherever how's everybody doing tonight? he is. looked like he'd fall over with great, let's get to the news one push like a jenga tower. why would you want to be jason at a debate any way? the plot of "friday the 13th" president trump said yesterday wasn't a mystical killer in that he won tuesday's hockey mask shouting down his presidential debate against former vice president, joe biden, but take it with a rivals while laying out a vision for the future if anything, trump would be less scary if he wore a jason mask.
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oh, thank god, it was just jason. but it was important to see one grain of salt because he also said he won "the voice." of trump's deranged conspiracy fox news anchor and presidential debate moderator, chris wallace, said in an interview yesterday theories disproven in real time in front of a national that he was surprised by the chaotic nature of tuesday's contest, adding no one could have predicted, quote, "this was television audience, because going to be the president's he's counting on conspiracy strategy not just for the beginning of the debate but the entire debate." "i had an inkling," said marco rubio, ted cruz, jeb bush, theories to stay in power. that's why he keeps repeating his completely unfounded lies carly fiorian, hillary clinton, all of his kids, all of his about the dangers of mail-in voting as he did again at the debate wives, his kindergarten teacher, >> as far as the ballots are some guy he ran into on the street in the '80s and the concerned, it's a disaster american public at large if you have an unsolicited they're sending millions of when asked yesterday if he welcomes support from white ballots all over the country supremacists, president trump there's fraud. says that he wants, quote, "law they found them in creeks. and order. okay, but that's not an answer they found some with the name to that question trump, just happened to have the name trump, just the other day in a waste paper basket. that's like if i asked you, "is this chicken poison," and then you said, "the mashed potatoes are delicious. they have mailmen with lots of - did you see what's going on? take a look at west virginia, aides to president trump mailmen selling the ballots? reportedly said they wanted him to be aggressive in tuesday's they're being sold presidential debate, but not act they're being dumped in rivers like jason voorhees from the >> seth: they found them in "friday the 13th" movies creeks and rivers? why is he talking like a wild oh come on, he's nothing like eyed frontiersman? jason voorhees "there's ballots down in them creeks and rivers. jason has the decency to wear a mask this will shock you. that's completely made up. there's no known instance of ballots being dumped in creeks say what you will about jason, or rivers, but i'm betting trump said that because he has
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definetyly dumped stuff in and there's plenty to criticize rivers him for. the man wears a mask when you're a new york real estate grifter with mob ties, six feet, he's a little bit worse on the east river is basically your he has violated that multiple filing cabinet we're not going to see trump's times. tax returns until they're accidentally brought up in a fishing net. real space hog, jason. "never seen anything undervalue according to a new report a golf course quite like that published in "the atlantic," before president trump mocks his christian supporters in private. wow, what a scoop. well, just another day in the i thought it was just in public. life of a maine fisherman. pope francis refused to meet that's not even the most insane with secretary of state, version of trump's mail ballot mike pompeo this week during pompeo's visit in rome, due to fever dream. recently, he told his supporters the proximity to the upcoming to watch out for ballots being presidential election. flushed down toilets besides, the biden campaign got >> get out there, and vote and to him first keep your eyes open if you see probably will. a florida man filed a $1.1 million lawsuit against okay, if you see people dumping mcdonald's and claims he broke a thing, flushing things tooth while biting in to a chicken mcnugget, and this is weird. >> seth: so you want your supporters to watch out for it was the chicken's tooth ballots being flushed down the toilet first of all, there's a good chance trump thinks this is a voting booth "ridiculous. i had to go all the way to a wally laughed so much he shook construction site to vote and it the card a little bit. was not a pleasant experience. >> sorry second, trump's bombarding us >> seth: come on, wally. i got to land these guys with these lies for two reasons, one to destroy confidence in the election and make us all think
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the rock band acdc announced it's hopeless. yesterday, the group will and two, to set the stage for a reunite to make a new album titled "power up." supreme court battle that will hand him a victory even if he loses. he's repeatedly said as much, the album will reunite all four of their original chords including in tuesday's debate. >> are you counting on the supreme court, including a justice barrett to settle any disputes that is the daddest rock joke from the daddest rock writer on our staff, bryan donaldson >> yeah, i think i'm counting on them to look at the ballots, definitely i wish you could see him we need nine justices. he looks like a guy who would you need that. write that joke about acdc throw him up with the unsolicited millions of throw him in the key, base ballots that they're sending, it's a scam, it's a hoax, german authorities announced everybody knows that today that clothing retailer h&m will pay $41 million in fines and the democrats know it better for collecting private than anybody else. information about its employees. so you're going to need nine justices up there. and like everything at h&m, i think it's going to be very that's too small important. paper ballots are very simple. and finally, in an effort to whether they counterfeit them, offer a healthy alternative to forge them, do whatever you candy, sun-maid is offering raisin snacks in halloween want themed glow in the dark >> seth: "counterfeit them, packaging. forge them, flush them, in fact, i've been going bathroom to bathroom recovering ballots that which means you'll be able to were flushed by democrats. see it even down in the dark bottom of the trash can. those were all votes for me. and that was the monologue, i just can't read them now." everybody. and republicans across the we have got a fantastic show for country with the help of trump's you tonight. campaign are already setting the you know her emmy nominated work stage for just such a legal on "saturday night live," battle by suing to delay counting or invalidate ballots cecily strong will be here to in swing states like wisconsin, tell us about this weekend's season premiere. pennsylvania, michigan and texas.
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trump's strategy is two pronged, to undermine the election and to create the impression that he's he is a seven-time, seven-time, inevitable all-star who played third base we cannot get rid of him, but we can. for the new york mets, it's in our power to end this. we can repudiate trump and the david wright will be here to talk about his memoir, "the gop and give our democracy a - captain. >> big, fat shot in the ass. now, there are only about ten people in the studio and one of >> seth: this has been "a closer them is a mets fan who's losing look." ♪ his mind over this so you may hear some steve squeals. [ laughter ] today's october 1st, which is the start of sober october she is an artist, actor, writer, if you're planning on taking the and filmmaker, definitely the sober october pledge but still coolest person who's going to be on any television tonight. want a great beer, try heineken 00 wit miranda july, excuse me, will 69 calories. join us. and i may be squealing about that i mean, i'm so excited, i can't even say the name right. but before we get to all that, right. the president tried to paint his okay opponent as drugged up, and that will not take very long to pass out all right. senile and it didn't work. but he's still moving forward well, instead, i will just toast to you all at home with plan "b," lying about voter we'll be right back with cecily strong. fraud and trying to steal the ♪ election for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." ♪ >> seth: donald trump wants to create the impression that he's a permanent fixture in our lives, that there's nothing we can do to get rid of him
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it's what he tried to do in new york by putting his name on every building in big gold letters, and on highway signs, and parking his dumb plane at laguardia. even the pigeons are starting to sound like him "coo, coo, this is a coup. trump wants us to think that he'll always be here and there's no point in voting against him because we can never get rid of him. that's why he wouldn't shut up at tuesday's debate. that's why he commandeers the national spotlight on a daily basis by saying something insane and forcing us all to think about him. or why last night, at another one of his all you can breathe covid buffets, he once again ♪ suggested that he might stay in office for another 16 years. with mobile scan and go, get in and get out. >> what are they going to do so you can get back to living. when in eight, 12, maybe 16 years, i ♪ say let's hang it up let's hang it up [ laughter ] 16 more years. >> seth: crushed his timetables, didn't know he was going to be able to do that. but i bet i love kellogg's frosted flakes more than you. but another 16 years the last four have already felt come on buddy my picture is on the box... like 16. it's the truth tony! 16 more would feel like 64 tie breaker, who's got the deeper voice? i asked our graphics team to computer generate an image of they're gr-r-reat! i win! i win! what i would look like after
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ohhh, you're cute when you're wrong. another 16 years of trump, and this is what they came up with ♪ together we can do anything well, at least i still have the show ♪ but despite what trump says, it is very much within our power to get rid of him and end this. ♪ nothing like i've ever seen ♪ that's what tuesday's debate was ♪ it's just a thing of beauty about and that's why trump and his allies have been lashing out ♪ at everyone, including the moderator, fox news host chris wallace after the negative reaction to trump's grotesque performance. at last night's rally, trump complained that wallace had the temerity to interrupt him. ♪ it's just a thing of beauty >> i said, "sleepy joe, name one law enforcement group that supports you." and then chris wallace said, "don't do that." ♪ can you believe this guy - i was debating two people last night. woo! - go ♪ you can riot, that's okay. arson's okay, but challenging sleepy joe is totally off limits go go go so disappointed in fox >> the commission on ♪ presidential debates is considering changes for the next debate and i'd just like to say to them, best of luck. you know the format's not the problem, right go go go it's not like it's hard to follow the rules go on a real vacation. i mean, she did it visit go or your nearest rv dealer.
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what are you going to do cut his mic? at this point, if you took his mic away, he'd probably just grow a new one, terminator we gave new dove men+care to mike style. who transforms homes for those in need. i feel comfortable and protected all day long. that turned out a lot better than i thought it would. dove men+care you did it again, manny! 48h freshness with triple action moisturizer. [ light laughter ] there's only one way to get trump to behave at debates "goldwe believe intriana good we can all afford. and if no one else will say it, i will ♪ sing it, yeah, yeah any time he breaks the rules, a hologram of fred trump should from a lighter load on the planet. appear and say, "what part of wait your turn don't you understand, donald?" ♪ all gold to ♪with a li. "i'm sorry, papa i'm just in so over my head and yeah, good to me ♪ you're not here to bail me out." "and i'll tell you something else you so called son of mine, picture perfect. knowinit's is hard. eliminate who you are not first, i paint a perfect picture. bomb the hoochies with precision. my intention's to get richer." and you're going to find yourself where you need to be. >> seth: is the hologram of fred trump singing the lyrics to "ain't nothing but a gangster ♪ party? the race is never over. oh, [ bleep ], yeah. the journey has no port. this is the same software from the coachella tupac hologram the adventure never ends, i guess we forgot to wipe it because we are always on the way. that is a real long walk ♪ [ light laughter ] but i think we had fun sometimes you got to enjoy the view, everybody. also, any changes you make, ♪
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trump's just gonna start whining. he never stops whining trump's allies are all like him, petulant children who whine and moan unless you let them rant uninterrupted for 90 minutes straight they're just bummed because their genius strategy of claiming joe biden is senile backfired when it turned out trump's the one whose brain is mostly room temperature velveeta trump and his cheerleaders on fox spent weeks, weeks insisting his opponent was a doddering old man with dementia who needed drugs and an ear piece to get through a debate and then the debate happened and it turned out the only candidate who sounded like he mixed the dog's valium with jose cuervo was trump. and by the way, when you're lagging with seniors in swing ♪ states due to a raging pandemic you failed to contain, i'm not sure calling your opponent a brain dead geezer is the awesome campaign strategy you think it is >> seth: all this week, we've "once you're 77, you're had a great drummer back with us basically dead she is an up and coming touring anyway, the seniors love me. and session drummer from in case you need reminding, chicago, illinois, whose videos trump spent weeks challenging have garnered millions of views. biden to a drug test and then as and be sure to check out her proof for his psychotic claim, instagram at jbirdsbeats, cited the internet jessica burdeaux is here thank you for another great week, jessica.
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>> do you really believe that joe biden will be on any type of performance enhancing drug ahead you know our first guest tonight of the debates or are you just from her emmy nominated work on "saturday night live" which joking returns for its 46th season this >> no, i'm not joking. i mean, i'm willing to take a drug test. saturday live from studio 8h i think he should too. with chris rock and musical people say he was on performance guest megan thee stallion. enhancing drugs. please welcome back to the show our very good friend, cecily strong. a lot of people have said that hi, ces. a lot of people have written that >> hi. hi, seth >> who has said that >> well, take a look at it take a look. >> seth: it's so nice to see you. why don't you just check - and i want to start by you can check out the internet congratulating you on your emmy you'll see, plenty of people say it nomination this year so well deserved they give him a big fat shot in the ass and he comes out - >> well, thank you [ laughter ] i have never been so happy to lose, i think. and for two hours, he's better than ever before >> seth: because you're a fan of who won in your category >> seth: sounds like trump just >> yes saw "awakenings" on the plane i mean, i'm a fan of everybody and thought it was a documentary. but i was like, joke that i was also it's telling that's how maybe only third on my own list. trump thinks you get a shot of adderall because it means that's how he gets a shot of adderall >> seth: this is -- we should give a shout out "just give me a little booty this is annie murphy of bump doc, straight up the wazoo. schitt's creek that won in your category and that is a show you love. >> yes also very telling when the president sites a source that has it been announced? >> i think it's out now. wouldn't be accepted on a high it's a little weird. school term paper. [ laughter ] the end schedule is weird this year >> yeah. and if biden's on performance >> seth: this is very exciting enhancing drug, like what's your explanation then for us to see you because you were one of the last people we are you on performance decreasing drugs had in studio before everything went sideways back in march.
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you know what drug you should you take you should take whatever drug makes you smile normal >> oh, i know. and i was talking so big, and i i mean, look at his neck strains. said i was going to go to the that's a face you make when you slam a glass of o.j. right after soccer game, which i did you brush your teeth looks like he tried to poison i went to an arena on sunday james bond's drinks but accidentally mixed up the and the person i was with was glasses. sick by thursday "here you are james, i believe i had the martini, shaken, not >> seth: really? that was the thursday where everybody basically left town, right? >> yeah. well, i quarantined for two weeks. >> seth: you lived your best life right up until the last minute >> i sure did. i got to see the soccer team win. the u.s. women's national team >> you had something that is, i think, on par with that kind victory. which is a lot of times, people will now -- because they know your skills as an impressionist is they will cast you from the public, and someone suggested you play don junior's girlfriend, kimberly guilfoyle, and it was bette midler in a tweet. >> it was the divine ms. midler. i cannot believe it. i emailed lorne immediately after i saw that tweet >> seth: and he responded. >> i was like, "bette midler said to do it, so. and he said, "we'll get the
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wig. >> seth: that's so nice of him he has such good wig contacts. >> yeah. yeah he got -- he is giving me one of his. >> seth: that's nice you -- my personal favorite, i think i text you almost every time you do jeannine pirro is this as much fun to do as it is to watch? >> yes absolutely and it's fun because colin is always a little bit surprised, and he enjoys it so much, being tortured >> seth: yeah. i feel like that kind of woman throwing a drink on collin is like a weird, like, maybe fantasy of his [ light laughter ] >> probably. but i don't want to think about that it way, because it will change things for me >> seth: it's going to take you and put you in your head the next time you do it. [ laughter ] >> yeah. it's kind of fun, you know, playing her and then even with bette midler tweeting, i've never felt more honored than, like, when a crazed brunette screams on television, people think of me.
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>> seth: yeah, that's true if saw a crazy brunette, i'd think, "uh, oh you're about to get cecily-ed. >> that's cecily, yeah >> seth: i think one of the exciting things about saturday that everybody's looking forward to, is jim carrey's gonna be there. he's gonna be playing joe biden. and the last time he hosted, there was the carrey family reunion. there you are as fire marshall bill. a very convincing fire marshall bill. >> classic look. yes. >> seth: was that good times >> that was so cool, because it was one of the instances that happens a lot on our show, where you get to meet, like, your comedy heroes, and it was nice doing a sketch like that we kind of got to show him and i think he really appreciated it too >> seth: not all -- this is a little heart breaking, but i think it's good for young actors out there to know that not -- you don't succeed at every turn. not all of your impressions have made it on "snl. you have an impression of idris elba on the television show "luther."
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>> yeah, it has to be "luther. >> seth: right this is not an idris elba impression this is specific to the bbc cop show "luther." >> and i wound up doing it for him at the host dinner >> seth: and did he like it? >> he said he did. and i'll tell you what he said after i do it. because it's mainly -- it's a physical thing >> seth: okay. >> it just goes -- "now out there, because i'm a coppa and it's ian, mate." [ light laughter ] it's a lot of just -- and he went, "so a lot of squinting." and that's a bad idris i was playing him then, not luther and i said, "yeah, well you're tired. luther is tired. >> seth: luther is tired he is a little over it i think his job is obviously made a lot harder. >> his job is freaking exhausting >> seth: it's exhausting but i think i missed that, that
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luther is often sort of just working -- a lot of this, yeah a lot of working the chin for old luther >> yeah. >> seth: and then i believe you were just listing the other characters that work with luther those were just his colleagues >> yeah, that's a lot of my impression work, is just me saying the other names of people on the show. >> seth: well, it makes it very clear to the person that you'r brett butler, i just yell at quentin when i do "grace under fire." >> seth: well, i think you can't do a luther and not do brett butler from "grace under fire." >> well, it's just like, "quentin, quentin go get russell at the pharmacy, quentin where is nadine? so, again, it's a lot of the other characters >> seth: do you get asked to do that one a lot >> i did it once, and then they stopped asking me. >> seth: well, that's -- >> if there is an impression i'm hiding you know how they do that on the show >> seth: oh, right, right, right. >> they email you once a week. >> seth: oh. oh, i see. like, yeah, right. they want to do an impression for each parade sketch and they'll say, "hey, do you have anything in your back
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pocket," and that's what you drop them. and i'm like, "well, 'grace under fire'. >> seth: this is very -- there was very exciting news that was released today you have a show that's coming out on "apple tv." >> yes is that -- where are you in the production schedule of that? just about to start? is that accurate-ish >> ish, yes. i'm not 100% i don't know about anything. i'm locked in a house. >> seth: but it's an incredible cast >> i'm so excited about this cast we got -- i mean, i've been like waiting to scream it from the mountain tops. just to get to work with keegan, is my co-star, and then all these amazing broadway folks, and it's just -- i'm thrilled. i've only had the zoom cocktail party with them so far >> seth: and this is the title of the show -- is the title official is it officially the title i have heard >> no. >> seth: great then i won't say it. [ laughter ] >> yeah. well you can say whatever you want, and you'll be wrong. >> seth: well, i try to avoid that at all costs. >> unless, i mean, if you have a good idea. by all means
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>> seth: but this is you and keegan michael key you're basically a couple that stumbles on to, sort of, a magical land where everybody believes they're in a musical. >> yes fred is in it. >> seth: fred, kristin chenoweth. >> kristin chenoweth, alan cumming, aaron tveit, dove cameron, ariana debose. it's really exciting >> seth: that's amazing. congrats on that cecily. i can't wait for saturday. it's always such a joy to see you. thanks for being here. >> yeah. thank you, seth. >> seth: i'll see you soon season 46 of "snl," premieres this saturday, with chris rock and musical guest, megan thee stallion. >> seth: we'll be right back with david wright. ♪ he trained his mind among 'the black bear school' of chess. speed players. trash talkers. you wanna come inside my house - how about i come in your house! and through defeat, he learned... ♪ you can beat every bear in the forest, but the game is never finished.
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♪ this halloween will be just like last. we'll buy tons of reese's cups for the youngins...
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(laughing) then eat them all ourselves. reese's. will track your sleep. excuse me, ma'am? yes? (sleepily) yeah, this already does that. oh, i didn't know that. well now you do. let's try this again. imagine, one day you'll be able to take an ecg. - does that. - does that. thank you. encourages you to stay fit? does that. oh! i don't know. imagine a tiny device that will check your blood oxygen level. (muffled) it already does that. well. that was fun. now, there's skyrizi. i have moderate to severe plaque psoriasis. 3 out of 4 people achieved... ...90% clearer skin at 4 months... ...after just 2 doses. skyrizi may increase your risk of infections... ...and lower your ability to fight them. before treatment your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. tell your doctor if you have an infection... ...or symptoms such as fevers,...
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♪ >> seth: our next guest is a seven-time mlb all-star and countless franchise record holder who played third best -- third base, excuse me, for the new york mets. his memoir "the captain" will be published on october 13th. please welcome to the show
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david wright thanks for being here, david >> seth, thanks for having me. >> seth: we are a little upset that you're not here live in the studio we have a lot of mets fans here who are very disappointed not to meet you, and -- >> i heard in the opening, there is one >> seth: we have one we also have one yankee fan, but he's the worst guy >> okay, good. >> seth: oh, there he is at least he knew who i was talking about. so i want to start by saying, i think we have children almost the exact same age 2 1/2 and 4 1/2. i certainly have enjoyed my time with them over this, you know, crazy era we are living through. have you had a good time with the kids >> i have. and let me start out by saying you rocked the trolls joke in the beginning, so -- >> seth: thank you very much >> you got a good dad chuckle out of me. [ laughter ] yeah, i think we really enjoyed the time doing things as a family that we typicallye hard n relearning how to color in the lines and cut straight and not get glue all over the place. so that's been a challenge but other than that, it's been fantastic. >> seth: yeah, we are all relearning our arts and craft skills they haven't fully abandoned us. you, i know -- obviously, you
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are retired now but you still work with the mets in an advisory role. how -- i assume you miss playing. do you miss it less seeing what the players had to go through this season? >> certainly certainly. with all the protocols it was a weird season. it was a tough season. i'm kind of a baseball traditionalist so seeing a dh in the national league kind of hurt a little bit. and seeing, you know, the runners start on second base and extra innings, you know, kind of was a bit of a gut punch and took a little getting used to. but i'm glad the game came back. you know, certainly glad that we had some entertainment during the tough times. so hopefully, we get back to some normalcy next year. >> seth: you famously grew up a mets fan despite the fact that you are from virginia. how does a kid in virginia end up being a fan of the new york mets because you really, you know, no offense to the mets, you could have picked anybody. then again, you were picking the mets before they had david wright, you know, so - >> rumor has it, you're somewhat of a pirate fan. so i'm not sure, you should look yourself in the mirror before
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that comment >> seth: that is heartbreaking that you found that out. >> our aaa team was in norfolk, virginia, which is about a 15 minute drive from my house. and my father worked in the police department. my mother worked in a local school system. so getting a chance to go to our aaa affiliates games, my dad knew a lot of the off duty police officers that were working security so, you know, they would kind of sneak me down sometimes and take pictures with some of the players or get some autographs or give me a foul ball and i got the biggest thrill out of meeting those players. and then, a couple weeks later, turning on the tv and seeing those same players playing in the big leagues in new york. so i grew up a bit of a displaced mets fan because of our aaa team >> seth: that's certainly a nice outcome that you ended up playing for your, you know, boyhood team how old were you when you made it to the bigs >> 21. >> seth: 21 years old. so you are moving to new york for the first time and, you know, i was 27 when i moved to new york and i was overwhelmed. 21, i can't even imagine true story you did not have a suit at that time? >> 100%.
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the trick was, and one of the -- a couple of the older guys, i was lucky i got caught up with a very veteran group the trick was you buy one sports coat and whether it matched or not, you just throw it over your shoulder to say you have it. so therefore, you're always in line with what the rules are, but you don't necessarily have to buy a lot to match. and at the time, i was pretty frugal you know, we went to montreal for my first road trip in the big leagues, and some of the veteran guys, mainly cliff lloyd took me out and bought me a bunch of suits to wear on the road and let me remind you, in 2004, the style was the bigger, the baggier, the better. so me walking out with this suit store with the huge monstrous mc hammer type pants, you know, it was a sight to behold and i'm glad that social media wasn't around then >> seth: yeah, that is good to know also, i think like 2004 wasn't quite mc hammer. i think cliff lloyd might've been pulling a veteran's prank on you >> possibly. possibly >> seth: no, it's 2004, hammer is huge.
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this is -- you know, it's pretty cool that you are writing a book i mean, obviously, you've accomplished a lot was it harder to write a book than you thought it would be >> so i never thought i really wanted to do it. i was approached by the co-author anthony dicomo who did a fantastic job guiding me along the way. but it was therapeutic for me. you know, i think as an athlete, you never get a chance to enjoy the moment while you're doing it you know, because you are always looking forward to that next challenge or trying to get ready for the next pitcher the next night. so, you know, to be able to relive some of these memories and these are some of the best memories that i'm going to have in my life you know, and to be able to see it from other people's perspectives or hear what teammates were thinking or fans were thinking or my family was thinking at that time, you know, was pretty cool. and a quick, funny story is one of the coolest things is i got a chance to take a couple dozen family pictures, personal pictures for the middle of the book so my parents still live in virginia i'm out on the west coast. so i call my dad and mom and i say, "hey, can you send me some pictures from back in the day, i
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want to go through them and get some childhood photos. so my parents being as frugal as they are, they fedex ground this thing. it comes like a week later there's four huge boxes. it's got to be tens of thousands of pictures. so going through these pictures and picking my favorites brought back so many great memories of not just baseball, but my youth and youth and growing up and playing baseball for the first time as a kid, and my grandparents who have since passed it was really cool and nostalgic to kind of go through it and piece it together. >> seth: well it's really -- it's really a nice document for, you know, the millions of fans who you meant so much to and it's really cool that you wrote it congratulations so much on the book and before you leave, i know you are still watching baseball. any predictions as we're in -- you know, entering i guess the end of first round of this crazy playoffs >> i guess since the mets and the pirates didn't quite make it to the playoffs, i will go with the easy choice and being out here in southern california, the dodgers look like they are pretty good. so that is the easy way out but i will take the dodgers. >> seth: there's nothing wrong with the easy way out. thank you so much for being here
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i really appreciate it, david. >> seth, it was a pleasure thank you very much. >> seth: "the captain" will be available october 13th wherever books are sold we will be right back with miranda july ♪ ♪ not much, how about you? are you answering my text in person? i am, yeah. lol come on in. this is tech that helps you be there. the nissan altima now offering the most tech-advanced engine in its class now any order can be rewarding when you use the app. no matter how you pay, you'll be closer to earning rewards and getting more of your favorites for free. more ways to pay, more ways to get rewarded. starbucks rewards.
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show miranda july. hello, miranda >> hi there, seth. >> seth: i'm so excited you're here we have been trying to have you on for a while >> yeah, i don't know if you remember we actually met once before. >> seth: i didn't think that you would remember [ laughter ] >> no, i do, i do. you were -- so you were coming out of an elevator and i was going in and you turned -- do you remember what you said to me >> seth: not - >> you said, "i love you." and then, the door shut. which -- which a lot of people might have taken the wrong way, right? like, people might have thought you meant i love your work or you're so cool, but i knew that you meant i love you. >> seth: i do. >> i know. >> seth: so can we talk about
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your movie "kajillionaire? i thought it was fantastic >> thank you >> seth: it's -- it's a movie about like low -- i would say lower tier family of con men is that an accurate way of describing it? >> right, right, not very good at their job >> seth: not particularly good and, you know, i know your work over the years and as we have established, i'm a fan of it it's often autobiographical to some degree. is there any of you in this family any of you in these characters >> do you mean am i a low-level con artist >> seth: well, yeah, i guess that is what i'm getting at. >> well, i will say in the like, embarrassingly entitled punk youth that i had, there was sort of a culture of stealing and i did -- i stopped and i don't condone that i remember like a turning point for me was i was -- i was like a guest artist, visiting artist. i was 23
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i probably should have been in college, not being a guest artist, but i remember kind of scoping out the room as was my habit for what i can take on the way out. like maybe a box of chalk or that video projector or something. and then, i caught myself and i suddenly realized, oh, you can either be this sort of respected artist person or you can have the box of chalk [ light laughter ] and i guess i made a choice there. >> seth: yeah, those were your two paths. and we are certainly happy with the one you picked i also -- i've read that you got this idea sort of half asleep, the idea for this film and usually, i would say most writers would tell you the ideas they get when you are half asleep, you wake up in the morning and you realize it's not a particularly good idea how quickly did you know that there was something here >> not very quickly. i just want to say that for all
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the writers out there. i had to withhold judgment you know, it seemed for the better part of a year like kind of a silly idea. but, you know, the cons and what does this all mean why waste my life on this? and then, i got to the end and read it back, and it kind of punched me in the gut. and i guess at that moment, i was like, oh, maybe that is the movie. maybe that's the ride. like you're laughing, you're laughing, you're laughing, you're crying. >> seth: and this is a film that, i mean, anxiety is a real theme of this film not just the idea of an earthquake, but also financial, economic, and family anxiety, and it must be so strange so have it come out at a time -- obviously, you made it before all this happened. in this hot bed of anxiety now >> yeah. i know it's so strange that anxiety was really personal to me, and a lot of the themes, like the sensitivity to touch and just the strangeness of this lead character, old dolio is her
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name, played by evan rachel wood and now, suddenly those subtle themes are like front and center like, those are not my weird things that's like the world's weird thing now. we are all old dolio >> seth: i also want to congratulate you on this monograph, this is a book about you that you had other people basically contribute i think it's like 80 people that basically talk about you was that terrifying to turn over, sort of give the keys to families and friends to tell your story >> yeah, i think i thought i would like that. you know how you secretly fear that you're a narcissist you know, like maybe you take the narcissist test online and you're like, am i? and i found out, real quick, like actually, it turns out i'm not.
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like i hit think threshold immediately and just had to disassociate for most of the experience of making that book and pretend that everybody was talking about someone else and i was just maybe working for that person, making her book for her. >> seth: it must be so strange too. because obviously people are giving you materials, and then, you have to -- because part of it is you take yourself out of it, right, and then, you get this incredible reflection of somebody because i think sometimes with autobiographies, you know, you are obviously getting one person's perspective it's so multi-layered to have a bunch of people, but at the same time, you are the gate keeper. was that a weird responsibility to have? >> i think i thought it would be more accurate that way like, i was actually assigned to write about myself and everything i started to write didn't -- it didn't seem true. everything was true but it didn't add up to the truth, you know what i mean and so, even if some of my
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friends are collaborating stories are like a little off or it's like just their version, somehow collectively, it's more a life >> seth: it's really wonderful, and one of my favorite, before you go, i should say that the many things you have done, one of my favorite things you ever did was an interview with rihanna, i believe in the "new york times" back in 2015. you know, i have long been enamored with rihanna. but that interview was the first time i realized truly how fun she was. was that as much fun to basically spend that time with her as it was to read? >> yes, i mean, we both are drunk with rihanna >> seth: we know yeah >> although, she was drunk with - i think i was the only one who would like nervously drunken myself i mean, i -- yeah, it mean, she's just so lovely right? >> seth: yeah. >> i'm so jealous that you really hung out with her like that >> seth: yeah, i'm just so sad it's over. and it's been over for like over a year
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i'm still just like working through, that it's probably not going to happen again. [ light laughter ] >> i remember her assistant -- like, i had to do some last minute fact checking or something, and her assistant signed off saying something like, you know, "see you around" or something and for the whole like next week, i was like, ready. like they were going to call me to hang out. and i was like, telling everyone, i don't know, we have -- you know, she said, "see you around." so that's -- you know, it's probably in the next few days. and then, someone pointed out, like, that is just what people - that's like bye. >> seth: yeah, because that was 2015 i feel like those plans would have probably firmed up by now >> i mean, i guess, yeah, no, you're right >> seth: miranda, it's been so lovely to have you here. the film is great. congratulations on the book as well, and i would like to close the way we began by saying i love you >> thank you [ light laughter ]
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>> seth: "kajillionaire" is in select theaters now. we'll be right back. ♪ ♪ go go go ♪ go go go go on a real vacation. visit go or your nearest rv dealer. go on a real vacation. "goldwe believe intriana good we can all afford. ♪ sing it, yeah, yeah from make believe made for everyone. ♪ all gold to ♪e to a t-shirt that means the world. yeah, good to me ♪
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if your inflammatory bowel disease symptoms develop or worsen, or if you've had a vaccine or plan to. serious allergic reactions may occur. learn more at ♪ >> announcer: for more "late night," go to follow us on instagram and twitter @latenightseth and be sure to check us out on youtube and facebook head over to itunes to subscribe to the "late night with seth meyers" podcast. you'll get "a closer look" and more downloaded right to your phone. ♪ you can go your own way
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