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tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  May 11, 2022 12:37am-1:37am PDT

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[ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers. tonight -- sam rockwell gubernatorial candidate from texas, beto o'rourke comedian mo amer featuring the 8g band with derrick wright and now, seth meyers [ cheers and applause >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. we hope you're doing well, tonight. now, we are going to get to the news president biden, today, held a bilateral meeting with italian prime minister mario draghi to reaffirm the partnership between
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the two countries. though i think he misunderstood which partnership. [ laughter ] president biden has reportedly told his national security officials that recent press leaks about intelligence sharing with ukraine need to stop and could further inflame tensions with russia. so, remember, "the ukrainian people have our full support, but if anyone asks, no they don't. [ laughter ] congressional republicans are reportedly split over what to do if the supreme court officially overturns roe v. wade. apparently, they can't decide between a ticker-tape parade or a dance party. [ light laughter ] i think it's a very fair point, but i understand why it was a huge bummer. [ laughter ] the senate passed a bill yesterday to expand security for supreme court justices, and just in time, did you see how close that lunatic got to clarence thomas? [ laughter ] 150 personal items that belonged to the late supreme court justice, ruth bader ginsburg, recently sold in an auction for over $800,000, though i think some of kavanaugh's stuff got
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mixed in [ laughter ] authorities in texas are looking for a man who allegedly burglarized a home and then mowed the front and back lawns before fleeing the scene police describe the suspect as your dad [ laughter ] a dog that escaped from a yard in brooklyn over a week ago, was spotted swimming in the east river and then walking through the battery tunnel before he was rescued from the parking lot of a home depot in new jersey though i'm not sure "rescued" is the right word it sounds more like he was apprehended. [ laughter ] "who told you where to find me?" authorities in nevada have reported finding several sets of human remains, over the last week, in lake mead as water levels drop amid an ongoing drought. on the upside, the mafia is now very invested in stopping climate change [ laughter ] artist andy warhol's silkscreen
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portrait of marilyn monroe sold, yesterday, at auction for $195 million and at old navy for $6 and finally, starbucks added a new drink to its menu today, which is cold brew coffee topped with chocolate foam and sweetened with vanilla syrup it's also their first drink to come with the bathroom key [ laughter ] well, that was the monologue, everybody and- [ cheers and applause i don't need to tell you, beautiful day. beautiful day in new york city temperatures are climbing. people are starting to make summer plans, and it's easy to get distracted from the job at hand and for my writers, that job is writing monologue jokes. you may not know this, but my writers write hundreds of jokes every day just to get the 10 or 12 we end up using in the monologue. and sometimes, to be honest, i think they just throw in a few stinkers to fill the page and
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meet their daily assignment. but just because the warblers are back in central park doesn't mean we can tolerate laziness, which means it's time for another surprise inspection. [ trumpet fanfare plays [ cheers and applause so here is how surprise inspection works. i'm going to read some real jokes that were really submitted by my writers that are absolutely unusable for this show some are dumb, some are offensive, some are confusing. most importantly, the writers don't know we're doing this. and because a lot of them don't watch the show, they'll never know [ laughter ] so let's get started authorities in philadelphia recently picked up two goats that were spotted walking through a neighborhood i'd tell you what the goats said when they were arrested, but we'd have to bleat it out. [ light laughter ] a young man named ian wrote that joke he looks like this [ light laughter ]
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did you -- did you get it? president biden is set to meet, tomorrow, with the italian prime minister where they will discuss the concerning rise of anti-pa [ light laughter ] so that joke is about antifa and antipasto. [ light laughter ] i forget who wrote it. can we take a look [ laughter and applause we're off and running. researchers at m.i.t. published a study, this week, that details the best way to split an oreo. and this is pretty surprising. it's with your butt cheeks [ light laughter ]
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like, so we -- somebody we pay money to - -- says, "i got a computer," and they're like, "oh, okay. i'll show this to my boss. [ laughter ] let's take a look at matt. matt wrote that. there you go [ laughter ] ooh. today was manatee appreciation day. so give them some props. [ audience aws ] kind of miss the butt cheeks a little bit kind of remember in the good old days of the butt cheek oreos brian wrote that [ light laughter ] a couple in massachusetts was recently awarded nearly $5 million in a lawsuit against a local country club after enduring years of golf balls crashing into their home this after the club only offered them "fore."
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[ light laughter ] so that joke required you to remember that they settled for $5 million and then the whole joke and then it got to four and that was -- hey, you know what, that was brian why don't we give him some props? [ laughter and applause yeah authorities in florida recently arrested a man who allegedly stole a crossbow from a store by stuffing it down his pants that, or his penis can shoot arrows [ laughter ] karen! [ laughter ] "that, or his penis can shoot arrows." i don't know if -- i don't think it makes any sense "you don't understand.
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the worst is he -- that guy, the poor man whose penis shoots arrows, his wife's like, "will you stop by the sporting goods store? he's like, "you know, every time i go in there, they think i'm stealing a crossbow. [ laughter ] according to a new study, having a long-term pet may delay memory loss, though the brain eating parasite in your cat's poop may have other plans [ light laughter ] that was from ally there's ally there -- she seems very -- now if you've been watching our show for any amount of time, first of all, ha second of all -- [ laughter ] -- you know that the worst offender on our writing staff when it comes to writing terrible, unusable, monstrous jokes is our writer mike scollins. let's take a look at mike. there he is. nope, that's ally. and that's mike right there. he once wore a tank top to work, so - [ laughter ] the thing about mike is he writes really good jokes
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he's a very good joke writer, but he has no middle ground. they are either monologue worthy or absolute shocking garbage so let's just turn the spotlight on mike for a few jokes here i'll get through them as fast as i can so it won't hurt that much russian forces have reportedly placed trained dolphins at the entrance to a port on the black sea to protect a naval base and they're still happier than the ones at seaworld [ light laughter ] a man from illinois has gained attention online after he claims to have found a 60-year-old mcdonald's meal behind his bathroom wall. also, grimace. [ laughter ] i mean, that's pretty good we could've done that one. you know what, i will say, like, this is also -- like, there's a poor graphics department that, like, mike writes these terrible things and then they got to go, like, that's their job today - [ laughter ] -- is like, well, we got to put the skeleton of grimace on a
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wall netflix announced, yesterday, it will develop five new shows for preschoolers based on famous dr. seuss books. but you're not going to like who's directing "hop on pop. guys [ audience ohs ] he's right they weren't going to like it. the tony award nominees were announced, yesterday, and the musical "mj" about the late singer michael jackson so, guys, let's just prepare ourselves, okay? the tony award nominees were announced, yesterday, and the musical "mj" about the late singer michael jackson, because i think we should be able to jump ahead and be like, which part of michael jackson? what's the joke? [ light laughter ] the tony-award nominees were announced, yesterday, and the musical "mj," about the late singer michael jackson, received 10 nominations well, it is supposed to be touching
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[ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] mike scollins, beat it this has been surprise-inspection. [ cheers and applause [ trumpet fanfare plays we got a great show for you, tonight. he's an oscar-winning actor, and yesterday he received a tony-award nomination for "american buffalo," which is playing now at the circle in the square theater in new york city. sam rockwell will be here. [ cheers and applause he is a former u.s. congressman and currently the democratic nominee for governor of texas. beto o'rourke will be joining us [ cheers and applause and he is a very funny stand-up. and his special, "mohammed in texas," is streaming now on netflix. mo amer will also be here. [ cheers and applause we'll be right back with sam rockwell stick around [ cheers and applause ♪
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us, derrick. [ cheers and applause our first guest, tonight, is an oscar-winning actor, you know, from movies like, "three billboards outside ebbing, missouri," and "vice." he just received a tony-nomination for best leading actor in a play for his work in "american buffalo," which is playing on broadway at the circle in the square theater please welcome back to the show, sam rockwell, everybody. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> seth: how are you >> hey, man. good, man. really good. hi >> seth: you know, i realize, obviously this is done for a reason, because tony award nominations come out on a monday >> yes so all you guys are dark so you can actually celebrate a little bit >> that's right. that's right i had -- i had a couple of libations and then i got the call about being on national tv tonight, and i realized maybe i should put that 17th one down. [ laughter ] and i was like, "okay, that's enough of that." >> seth: yeah. >> but i saw a movie yesterday
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that was -- that i think your producer was talking about >> seth: yeah. >> and "everything everywhere at once." >> seth: yes which i've heard is incredible >> it's -- i think it's the best movie this year. i just flipped out, man. i just thought -- i thought it wato the theater >> i did >> seth: that's really exciting. >> with some friends yeah >> seth: yeah. >> it was great. it was really fun. >> seth: did you know in the morning -- did you have any expectation that the -- were you, like, going to pay attention or were you going to wait until somebody called you as far as the nomination >> i kind of needed to sleep so i did that. and then i got a bunch of texts, yeah >> seth: yeah. >> yeah. >> seth: that's really exciting. >> it is exciting. >> seth: and tonight, after this, you're going to go and you're going to do your first show as a tony-nominee >> yes >> seth: a little extra pressure >> a little extra pressure [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> seth: but it's really -- it's a really cool show it's a famous david mamet play and you're doing it with larry fishburne and darren criss >> yeah. >> seth: larry fishburne, i mean, one of the -- one of the all-time greats. >> laurence fishburne, i think one of the greatest living actors on the planet, really he's -- he's really something.
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i mean, he's -- he and i, you know, we facetimed during the pandemic to -- the lines, we would run lines and stuff and gotten really close. and the formidable darren criss, who was on "the versace. >> seth: yeah, he was fantastic. >> he did "hedwig," you know he's -- he's amazing, and yeah so it's -- i'm very lucky to be working with these guys. >> seth: do you ever -- with someone as iconic as laurence fishburne, are you ever -- are you ever looking at him and seeing other characters he's played? >> i do. i do you'll see -- just like you would with christopher walken or any of these people, gene hackman, you'll see a little popeye doyle or something. and yeah, i mean, you'll see a little morpheus, a little ike turner you'll see like that [ light laughter ] you see -- i think with chris walken, same thing you had that experience where you see "the deer hunter," you see "the dead zone." and, you know, i think a lot of people don't realize that the reason people like chris and laurence are so amazing and why they can, you know, chris walken in "pulp fiction," you do that monologue or, you know, all of a sudden, you know, laurence is -- is morpheus. i think they don't realize all the stage they've done
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you know, laurence won a tony for "two trains running" and he's done "fences" and he's "thurgood. and so, like, that -- they bring that to their film work. >> seth: yeah. they know exactly -- yeah, they know how to connect. >> yeah. >> seth: yeah. >> yeah. >> seth: it's a really cool thing to see you obviously have been a big part of the new york acting scene for a long time. we were talking backstage. >> yeah. >> seth: this is one of my favorite photographs of new york >> oh, yeah, that's amazing. >> seth: so this is -- and i asked you because i never knew what it was. this is you, justin theroux, philip seymour hoffman and billy crudup and i'm always like, "why are these guys in tracksuits smoking cigarettes?" [ laughter ] because it doesn't quite look like - >> smoking is really - >> seth: yeah. >> it really doesn't it was -- it was a "celebrity charades. it's a charity >> seth: so you were, it was "celebrity charades" and you dressed up in costume? >> yes, and yul vazquez was on that team and he took that picture. and we were the winning team for two years in a row and it was "celebrity charades," if you could picture that. robin williams did it. it was very nice to do it for
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us and a lot of people, julia roberts and so, yeah, we're just getting ready, warming up >> seth: yeah, you're just walking. you're just on your way to go do "celebrity charades. >> yeah, yeah. >> seth: oh, so that's - >> and phil -- phil did a "true west" in the theater i'm acting in now, which is really great. >> seth: we've talked in the past about your parents were - your mom was an improviser, your dad was an actor >> yeah. >> seth: and -- and, you know, it must have been a unique upbringing having parents in the arts like this but what was urban pioneers? >> mm! urban pioneers -- urban pioneers is kind of like outward bound. it's like a kind of -- but for me, it was for all the sort of dropouts, you know, the people who were getting d minuses >> seth: okay. >> and so they would send you to this outward bound kind of thing. but it turned out to be a really
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amazing program. >> seth: so this is -- do they sort of take you aside at school and they're like, "sam, this school is -- you're not crushing it so we're going to -- we're going to send you to the woods." [ laughter ] >> yeah, exactly >> seth: and it was in the woods, was it actually >> it was in the woods we did a hiking trip for two weeks. we would repel off mountains and stuff, and it was really cool. we learned how to -- >> seth: were you hesitant at first? >> i was i was. because all the dropouts would go there but it turned out actually - >> seth: did all the dropouts come back or did they leave a few? >> they would come back. >> seth: okay. >> they would come back more rugged >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> and, you know, it really, actually, turned out to be life changing >> seth: really? >> and yeah, wayne mcdonald was the guy, and he -- he kind of changed my life. i did a monologue for the class from "the hustler," and it really kind of changed my whole direction. and one of the big things, is that when we went on the hiking trips, we had to solicit food from places like pizza hut you have to get like five cans of tomato sauce. >> seth: you would just walk into a pizza hut and say, "we're going on a hike, we need tomato sauce? [ laughter ] >> exactly >> seth: wow >> you're, like, a teenager. and you'd go into these places, you know -- straw hat pizza. >> seth: and also, like, i mean, one of the teenagers that looks like maybe they're not telling the truth, right >> exactly >> seth: i mean, it's the dropouts, right? >> exactly a little shady
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[ laughter ] and, you know, you want like, you know, a case of margarine and tomato sauce for your hiking trip -- your two-week hiking trip and they're like, "okay. and -- but you couldn't ask your parents to pay for it. you had to go out and solicit it -- ask them to give it to you. and that showed some initiative. if you wanted to eat on a trip, you had to solicit this food [ laughter ] and so that taught us a lot about, you know, hustling and, you know, auditioning and that kind of stuff. >> seth: yeah, that -- actually, as an actor, it's a good idea to remember >> yeah. >> seth: i mean, with that said, i don't know if i was on a hike, i'd be psyched to eat like a big thing of pizza hut butter. [ laughter ] we go -- we got a big, like, industrial hunk of pizza hut margarine. >> yeah, there were some other things and yeah. [ laughter ] yeah, you do the best you can. >> seth: you do the best you can. well, obviously -- obviously, it paid off whatever confidence it gave you paid off and now, you know, obviously you've done a lot of film work >> yeah. >> seth: but being back in a theater, especially an intimate space like that, how is it for you to be able to see their
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faces -- to get that instantaneous response >> it's amazing, you know, and and, you know, people they have the masks on and stuff, but it's really -- it's really amazing. and you could see them if they're napping or if they had their iphones out. and darren, i sort of gave him a hard time at this -- at this when we asked for some money for broadway for cares >> seth: yeah. >> but yeah, it's -- it's funny. it's funny to see people out there. >> seth: has a -- have you had a phone go off of somebody - >> we did. >> seth: okay. >> we did. and laurence, maybe made them poop their pants a little bit by saying, "don't do that." and i think -- >> seth: oh, in the middle of -- he broke -- he broke out of -- >> a woman went like this. and he said -- and i thought he was going up on his lines, you know, and i saw him at the end of the day on stage. and i -- i started saying my line, and he wasn't responding and i saw him looking out at the house, and i realized -- and then he went, "don't do that again. [ light laughter ] and then the woman didn't.
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and then we were going to complain to her, and she beat us and complained to us about ruining her experience >> seth: really? [ laughter ] >> yes i think the word - i know, right? [ laughter ] it's amazing >> seth: yeah. >> i think the word monster was used and that laurence had ruined her theatrical experience [ laughter ] and, wow i mean, you know >> seth: yeah. >> it's something. >> seth: i do think we live in an era where the first defense ass[ bleep ] use is like, you're the ass[ bleep ] >> yes, yes. >> seth: and i'm really worried about it, because i feel like that's the move these days and i don't like it. >> i don't like it either, man but i'll tell you what, if -- if laurie metcalf or laurence fishburne told me to put my phone down, i'd -- i'd do it >> seth: i'd, like, put it down and never pick it up again >> yeah, exactly exactly. >> seth: all right well, we, we're decent human beings i think if there's anything to take away from this. >> i mean, i would hope so we're not at the movies. >> seth: hey, congratulations, again. >> hey, man, thanks a lot. >> seth: thank you so much for being here you guys, sam rockwell "american buffalo," now playing at the circle in the square theater
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we'll be right back with beto o'rourke. [ cheers and applause ♪ (dad allen) you know when you see a great deal on a phone, and then
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> seth: our next guest is a former united states congressman and currently the democratic nominee for governor of texas. please welcome back to the show, beto o'rourke, everyone. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> seth: welcome back. it's always lovely to have you back in new york city. we talked last time about how you spent some time in brooklyn. you had busta rhymes -- an old trampoline from busta rhymes on the roof of your apartment, which is a pretty cool thing >> very cool thing >> seth: yeah. >> a big memory. >> seth: yeah.
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>> yeah. >> seth: you also drove -- one of your jobs when you were living in brooklyn, is you drove around famous artwork? >> i worked for a company called hedley's humpers >> seth: okay. [ laughter ] >> and we would receive and crate pieces of art that were bought by our customers, and then deliver them to their homes. and so, yeah, i would be driving down the streets of new york in a box truck with amazing pieces of art one time i was able to handle a picasso. >> seth: wow >> if you can believe this you know, what am i, 23-years-old, and i've got a picasso in my hands for a very important client. >> seth: i was going to say, it's a terrible -- hedley humpers is a terrible name, except i don't think anyone would ever think a picasso would be in a truck -- >> right >> seth: like, you would be like, that's probably just full of old pillows or something. >> right, right, right but amazing people who worked there. most of them were artists. i was not. one guy went on to have a great career named dave ford, who does these amazing interactive sculptures, including one that he developed by putting canvas down on the floor of the truck and then hanging drawing implements from the ceiling, and it would record this, kind of,
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kinetic map of our journeys along the way. and, you know, now you can't get your hands on them because they're so valuable, but amazing experience loved living in new york but soon enough, i knew i needed to be back in texas. >> seth: yes >> that's where i'm from my family's there. and i just missed the state, missed home. >> seth: so back in texas, you're running against governor greg abbott. and obviously, you know, texas -- he, you know, banned abortion after six weeks and that, i think, is scary enough, but he also implemented this bounty law. can you explain exactly how harrowing this element of his law is >> yeah. so there's a law in force right now that is a six-week abortion ban with a $10,000 bounty placed on the back of anyone who assists any woman in making her own decision about her own life, her own body, her own health care
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but it's actually worse, because he also signed what is known as a trigger bill, which means that if the supreme court overturns roe v. wade, which is likely to happen, it triggers a total abortion ban beginning at conception, with no exception for rape and no exception for incest and that's happening in a state that leads much of the developed world in a crisis of maternal mortality. it means that our moms and women are dying faster than almost anywhere else, because as you close down all these reproductive health care clinics, not only is it harder to get an abortion, it's harder to get a cervical cancer screening, or to see a family planning provider, or to get a doctor at all in the least-insured state in the country. so this is deeply, deeply harmful, and frankly, deadly to the women of texas that's why we've got to win this race, win political power, and get the state back on the right track, so every woman can make her own decision about her own body, her own future, and her own health care. [ cheers and applause >> seth: there is -- i think it's so important.
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you don't want to get in a situation where you're always saying the sky is falling, and yet, when donald trump appointed these new supreme court justices, a lot of people said, they're going to overturn roe v. wade. so the sky was falling so i know i'm putting you in a tough position, but what do you think? it's bad enough with the abortion ban, but what do you think governor abbott might do next, empowered with this ability to take these steps that he's already taken >> i saw a headline today. you know, some of his colleagues in the state legislature are talking about a law that would stop texas women from traveling to other states to seek their constitutional right to an abortion and this is stuff that maybe is happening because of a failure of imagination on our part like, "there's no way this is going to happen," and it is now happening. "there's no way it could get worse," but it will, unless we change course. the encouraging thing that i can share with you from texas, is that the people of texas want
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better a majority of us do. we had a rally on saturday in houston for reproductive health care rights. 5,000 people came out on three days' notice it was the largest reproductive health care rally in the country, and it happened in the place you'd maybe least expect it to happen in, which is texas. but i think that reflects the majority of us there, who not only want to make sure that our rights are protected, but they want us to get focused on the big things that we can all actually agree on, like the kind of jobs we want to create, focusing on our public schools, getting the backs of our public school educators, expanding medicaid, which we haven't done in texas, though most of the rest of the country has, so that people are healthy enough and well enough to live to their full potential those are the things that we want to do the abortion ban, this crazed focus on transgender kids and arresting their parents for child abuse, permitless carry, the failure of the power grid, that's reflective of current leadership, not of the state of texas. my job as a candidate is to go out and meet the people of texas, to bring them into this
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election we do that, and i'm confident that we're going to win in november >> seth: all right i got some more questions for you. we'll be right back with more from beto o'rourke [ cheers and applause ♪ looking to get back in your type 2 diabetes zone? once-weekly ozempic® can help. ♪ oh, oh, oh, ozempic®! ♪ ♪ oh, oh, oh ♪ ozempic® is proven to lower a1c. most people who took ozempic® reached an a1c under 7 and maintained it. and you may lose weight. adults lost on average up to 12 pounds. in adults also with known heart disease, ozempic® lowers the risk of major cardiovascular events such as heart attack, stroke, or death. ozempic® helped me get back in my type 2 diabetes zone. ozempic® isn't for people with type 1 diabetes. don't share needles or pens, or reuse needles. don't take ozempic® if you or your family ever had medullary thyroid cancer,
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so, on our award winning vacations drinks, wi-fi and tips are always included. every sailing. every room. every guest. effortless from the start. celebrity cruises. ♪ [ cheers and applause >> seth: welcome back to "late night. we're here with beto o'rourke. you mentioned -- and i don't want to just pass over it without talking about exactly how awful it is. but governor abbott made it, basically, the state of texas investigating parents who provide gender-affirming care to their children, basically investigating them for child abuse. you went on mother's day and you made dinner for one of these families >> i did >> seth: played a little music, as i know you like to do >> yeah. >> seth: and can you just tell us, you know -- and i'm sorry
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that so much of this is so depressing, but can you tell us, like, what is it like for a family like that, to be basically almost criminalized for being a loving parent? >> first thing i'll tell you is, i've met families like the briggles all over the state of texas, and these parents are the most loving parents you'll find anywhere they're doing their best to help their kid navigate this incredibly difficult time in their lives, and they're searching for answers, just loving the hell out of them, just trying to make sure that they're okay and our governor, greg abbott, is proposing charging them with child abuse. and if that charge is sustained, not only taking their trans kid from them, but every other child in the household, placing them in a foster care system in texas that is the worst-run in the country, where 100 kids in that system died last year in the custody and the care of the state of texas instead of fixing that system and the vulnerable kids that are in it, he's going to take these kids from their loving parents and put them there
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so i wanted to show up on mother's day, cook a great meal, bring some flowers, have a beer, and just make sure that we shined a light on this loving family, so that our fellow texans understand what's at stake. i mean, they might lose what i take for granted with amy and our three kids, and i want to make sure that we fight for them, and fight for everybody who's under attack in texas right now. so showing up for them and standing up for them was important to me. >> seth: that's really great that you did that. [ cheers and applause >> yeah, happy to. >> seth: let's be honest how was the dinner you made? what do you think? >> it was great. [ laughter ] the one thing i can make really well is a diner-style hamburger -- >> seth: okay. >> -- where you press the beef down into the pan. some velveeta cheese slices. >> seth: okay, gotcha. >> my wife, amy, added this twist where we use an english muffin instead of a regular bun. mayonnaise and a raw onion on it >> seth: okay. >> and just, all of that together is just amazing >> seth: do you use their pan? did you use their pan or did you
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bring your own >> we were cooking for so many people that we used their cast iron, and then i bought a cast iron - >> seth: all right >> -- and donated it to the house as well. >> seth: okay, that's fair all right, that's cool >> you don't want to show up empty handed >> seth: if you showed up at our house, my wife would not let you near our pans. [ laughter ] hey, you know, somebody who was talking about and then ultimately decided against running for governor of texas, was matthew mcconaughey, who, you know, is a friend of the show and would there be room for matthew to do something in an o'rourke administration, if you won? >> absolutely. >> seth: yeah. >> this guy's a great texan. beyond being an extraordinary actor, when the chips are down in our state, this guy shows up. so we had a horrific shooting in el paso in 2019. 23 people were killed after greg abbott, donald trump, and others warned of this invasion of mexicans and immigrants who were coming to get us. mcconaughey showed up to el paso, raised money, donated it to the community, was there, you know, physically present to make sure that we all knew that
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he was with us when we had this winter storm last year and abbott couldn't keep the lights on, the power went off, hundreds died, tens of billions of doll famous friends together, and they raise millions of dollars for the state. so, this guy is there for texas, and he's got such an amazing heart, so whatever he wants to do and whoever he can help, we want to turn him loose and let him do that. but he's an example of the spirit of the state. i don't know if the guy is a republican or a democrat, and it doesn't matter, because before either of those things, we're texans, we're americans, we're human beings, and we should start treating one another that way. [ cheers and applause and so we're going to do that in texas. >> seth: you have often -- attention has been paid to the fact that you really -- you know, it's a giant state, and you get out and you drive around and you go to places that maybe people who run for governor don't ever stop by is that the plan this time again? i know you were a little -- you know, during covid, the way you organized, the way you, you know, ran elections in the past wasn't available in the same way. is it nice to be back out there
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seeing texans face-to-face >> i love it i love being on the road i love showing up in communities where they maybe don't expect you. so, you're going to expect us in austin and houston, dallas, el paso, my hometown, san antonio, the rio grande valley but you show up in childress, shamrock, texas, pampa, where woody guthrie spent some time, dalhart, amarillo, san angelo. these places are so red, you can see them glowing from outer space as you are orbiting the planet, but they're also unrepresented, because where democrats fear to tread, republicans don't have to show up and contest the vote. and so folks don't have anyone to hold accountable, anyone to share their hopes with or their concerns when we show up and hold a town hall, i learn so much, but i also build support and trust in that community, and we bring in some more votes. and at the end of the day, i mean, we lost to ted cruz by two and a half points, right there are millions more texans who've since been added to the rolls, and millions who've been effectively, through voter suppression, kept from voting.
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we're targeting those who've been the targets of intimidation and suppression, so that they provide the margin of victory when we win this thing on november 8th so, i love traveling the state it's the right way to do it. and i think it's the only way to win. >> seth: well, you know, stay healthy out there. i know it probably takes a lot out of you and thanks so much for making time for us today. i really - >> thank you i really, really appreciate it >> seth: you guys, that's beto o'rourke. we'll be right back with mo amer. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ one-two-three uh, alright, uh!♪ ♪got to know how to pony♪ ♪like bony maronie♪ ♪ uh!♪ ♪ hah!♪ ♪ oww!♪ ♪ ♪ ohh, help me!♪ learn how everyone gets a free galaxy s22 with a galaxy trade-in.
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> seth: our next guest is a very funny comedian and actor whose latest special, "mohammed in texas," is available on netflix please welcome to the show, mo amer, everybody [ cheers and applause ♪
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>> seth: welcome how are you? >> i'm great >> seth: this is very exciting your special takes place -- you shoot it in texas. >> yep >> seth: you grew up in texas, but you left kuwait for texas. >> correct >> seth: that must have been a trip, as a kid [ laughter ] >> we left -- a big part of it we didn't just, like, voluntarily leave. >> seth: yeah. >> we left because of the gulf war >> seth: yes >> part one. [ laughter ] and we ended up in houston, texas. >> seth: how old were you at the time [ cheers ] >> 'sup, h-town. people made it apparently other people fleeing texas, as well [ laughter ] >> seth: so how old were you when that happened >> i was 9 >> seth: okay, and so how was texas? it must have been a culture shock. >> it was, definitely. i mean, my family did no research when we moved to houston. >> seth: mm-hmm. >> i went to a private british english school in kuwait and ended up in houston in a
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gang-riddled neighborhood, and i was caught in between a gang battle mexicans were trying to recruit me because they thought i was mexican, and black gangs wanted to beat me up because they thought i was mexican. [ laughter ] i'd be walking down the street, and i see the mexican gangs hanging out, and they were like, "hey, vato you walk by here every day you don't say nothing, don't do nothing. you ashamed of your own peoples, bro? you ashamed of your own people -- la raza, your familia, bro? i'm like, "nah, man, my name is mohammed." [ laughter ] they're like, "what? they're like, "for real, bro you look exactly like my cousin hector no way, bro! [ laughter ] >> seth: and then was it important for you to shoot this special there? >> absolutely, it was so important. i mean, houston is the city that raised me and embraced me and showed me so much love it was a big, big part of my life, and i think houston doesn't get the flowers that it deserves so that's why i decided to shoot it there >> seth: that's a really nice way to show some gratitude to
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your hometown, your adopted hometown >> absolutely. >> seth: you did a film with the rock, and you actually -- the rock, via video -- >> yeah. >> seth: -- opens this up for you, opens up your special how is it working with the rock? >> it was good he was trying to get bigger for the movie. we did the black adam movie. and he was just so great, man. he was really gracious and like you said, he introduced me for my special, which was so cool but, you know, he's just a fun guy, and i didn't know how much fun he was, you know what i mean like, you're just on a superhero set, and no way you can prepare for that and he just walks on, and he's the only one that didn't need, like, muscle pads. he just walks on just wearing spandex. and everybody is calling him different names, like, "what's up, rock?" "what's up, dj?" "hey, dwayne." and i walked up to him like, "hey, man, what do i call you? he goes, "daddy. i was like - [ laughter ] i just looked at him i was like, "faja? [ laughter ] is that you, faja? i'd get adopted by him, you know
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what i mean? >> seth: yeah. i mean, that's the jackpot >> yeah, it would be cheat meals every day, bro >> seth: i heard a story that you had a english teacher who was aware that you wanted to be up on stage doing comedy and let you use the room for comedy in return for doing some more scholarly stuff. >> yeah, exactly it was a thing like, my dad died when i was 14, and i was just skipping class. i was basically living like "ferris bueller's day off. i was, like, on third base watching the astros. i was like 14. i had no business being there, you know and she just was so proactive and amazing. she goes, "don't you want to be a comedian don't you want to graduate high school how would your father feel if you don't graduate?" i'm like, "that's a cold shot, mrs. reed! [ laughter ] "yeah, i do. and she goes, "well, if you go up in front of the class and recite shakespeare, i'll give you extra credit, and i'll let you do stand-up every friday."
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and i was like, "that's a hell of a bargain." i was like, "do i have to do it? like, can i just do it comically? she goes, "you can do it any way you want." so i just went up right in front of the class i was like -- "to be or not to be 'tis the question." you know what i mean >> seth: i have to ask, did you ever have a bad set with your material in front of the class >> i did i did. science class. it was a rough one >> seth: yeah. >> the labs were going, you know what i mean? kids were trying not to burn themselves and i'm, like, trying to do chris farley impressions in front of them. "you're going nowhere! you know, like - [ laughter ] you know, it just didn't work out. >> seth: how does your family -- i mean, they must be so proud of you now. how do they feel when they -- when they get to see you doing stand-up >> oh, they think i'm an engineer [ laughter ] >> seth: oh, okay, gotcha. >> yeah, yeah. >> seth: will this be the first they - >> this is -- i'm sorry, mom what a failure i am. no, they're really - you know, it's an indigenous art
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form to america, stand-up comedy, right? it's like stand-up, hip-hop, and jazz and so, i never knew it existed. so my family, in turn, didn't really understand what was happening, particularly my mother and yeah, man. she's very proud she's very, very proud, yeah i met steve harvey, and that was, like, the biggest accomplishment even though i toured with chappelle for, like, ten years you know, jon stewart. i've worked with the rock and everything else. steve harvey that's it, you know what i mean? it was like, my mom watches game shows, that's it "meeting steve harvey, oh! you're really making it now. >> seth: well, he's worldwide. steve harvey is really a worldwide star hey, mo, really great to meet you. congrats on the special. >> thank you so much >> seth: thank you for coming out tonight. all right. you guys, that's mo amer, everybody! [ cheers and applause "mohammed in texas," streaming now on netflix will be right back with more "late night. [ cheers and applause ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> seth: i want to thank my guests, sam rockwell, beto o'rourke, and mo amer i want to thank derrick wright and the 8g band. stay safe. get vaccinated get boosted. we love you. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ ♪ . it does not look like or feel like the month of may. tonight rain,


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