tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC February 17, 2023 11:34pm-12:38am PST
>> is luigi there? >> yes of course. the little brother. >> next week would be a good time to play. >> not thursday. >> a lot of kids will be off for winter break . the weather will cooperate. coming at a good day tomorrow's forecast. temperatures in the 60s on the seven-day forecast, 67 saturday, 69 sunday. get some wind monday and tuesday and then spotty rain wednesday thursday friday. that will be the better time playing this weekend. >> we are all pretty excited that it is friday night. >> the luigi and mario go places together? >> the green and red hat, the whole deal. it's really fun. >> have a good nigh [ cheers and applause ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon."veel 6enroll
tonight, join jimmy and his guests - adam scott elizabeth debicki. comedian nathan macintosh.es, co inam an d featurinetg the legei.ndary roots crew >> questlove: 1802 >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. yes! thank you so much. welcome. please, enjoy yourself welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show," everybody. you're here. you made it. [ cheers and applause
i'm so excited about this. today is our ninth anniversary on "the tonight show." [ cheers and applause ♪ that's right nine years, 1,800 episodes, and one really awkward conversation with nicole kidman [ laughter ] yep, nine years. of course, we've had some work done, so we only look seven. [ laughter ] nine years, that means the show is officially halfway to dating leonardo dicaprio. [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] >> steve: no, you didn't oh, come on. come on. >> jimmy: our show premiered during the 2014 winter olympics [ cheers ] that's how long it's been. we started way back when there was still winter [ laughter ] it's a major accomplishment. and as a thank you to the entire staff, i gave them off for presidents' day weekend. [ laughter ] >> steve: aw >> jimmy: isn't that nice. the traditional gift for the ninth anniversary is pottery
so, later tonight, tariq and i will be re-enacting the scene from "ghost. [ laughter and applause that's right we've been on the air for a whole nine years i can't believe it a lot has changed since then i mean, look -- this is a picture of me when i first started. that's real. [ audience aws ] here's a picture of you, tariq [ laughter ] can you believe that was nine years ago? and here's a picture of you, higgins. [ laughter and applause >> steve: a long time ago. >> jimmy: nine years ago yeah, nine time flies well, and as i mentioned, it is presidents' day weekend. of course, every family is different. some get together on presidents' day, while others celebrate on presidents' day eve. [ light laughter ] yep, not only is it a long weekend, but everybody's pumped for this today "ant-man and the wasp: quantumania" hit theaters. [ cheers and applause yeah which is great because usually to see ants at a theater you have to go to go to regal cinemas. [ audience ohs ]
"sit whatever you want i don't care where." [ laughter ] "my seat doesn't go back." "i know, but it goes forward." [ laughter ] meanwhile, i heard that in the future, disney wants to spread out their marvel releases. yeah disney knew it was time to slow down when they started making a movie about the hulk's tailor [ laughter ] "i work on his suits all the time i say please don't get angry, mr. banner." some news from washington. president biden just had his annual physical exam and his doctor reported that biden is healthy and vigorous. [ laughter ] even democrats are like, healthy and vigorous did he go to trump's doctor? [ laughter ] then biden left the room, the doctor was like, "yeesh. [ laughter ] yeah, biden's doctor said he's healthy and vigorous but has a a stiff gait he basically got the same results as seabiscuit.
[ laughter ] biden's doctor also said he had a small lesion removed from his chest, which sounds like a a polite way of saying third nipple [ laughter ] what this is odd though biden's actually gotten taller this is true he's actually gotten taller since his physical a year ago. forget the ufos. i want to know how an 80-year-old grew [ laughter ] what's going on? taller [ applause ] and everyone's still talking about this last weekend, the u.s. shot down three ufos, and it turns out one of them might have been a $12 hobby balloon that belonged to a group called the northern illinois bottle cap balloon brigade. [ laughter ] so, it looks like we've made a a very powerful enemy. [ laughter ] yep, all this week, people have been talking about the u.s. shooting down ufos. it feels like we're in the middle of a -- >> i want to shoot me a ufo.
>> jimmy: excuse me? excuse me? >> i said, i want to shoot me a ufo. why's the government get to have all the fun i got me great aim with my slingshot. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you think you can shoot down a ufo with a slingshot? >> i know i can. i got to use my slingshot. i just got it back from my teacher. >> jimmy: your teacher how old are you? >> 45. >> jimmy: you're still in school >> yep my teacher took my slingshot in first grade. and i had to re-enroll in elementary school to get it back >> jimmy: couldn't you just have asked your teacher to give back your slingshot without re-enrolling in the first grade. or buy a new one >> i don't like your tone, fallon eat rock [ laughter ] you see, i told you i got great aim. i just hit a ufmf, unidentified flying mother [ bleep ]. [ laughter and applause >> jimmy: get him out of here. get this guy out of here
let's get this guy out - >> i'll be back, fallon. you haven't seen the last of me [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: what the hell is wrong? you can't talk like that >> steve: oh, my god that guy was rude. and had a foul mouth >> jimmy: yes. >> steve: a foul mouth >> jimmy: this is a family show who is that guy? get him out of here. >> steve: goodness gravy >> jimmy: some business news here, guys i saw that the ceo of youtube is stepping down when employees heard, they were like, first. [ laughter ] of course, before her announcement, she made everyone sit through a 15-second ad for vrbo [ laughter ] well, i read that peeps flavored pepsi is back yeah and it'll be available everywhere this time yep, pepsi that tastes like peeps. yes, tariq >> tariq: question, does the pepsi taste like a peep or does the peep taste like a pepsi? >> jimmy: i don't think it really matters [ light laughter ] yes, tariq >> tariq: if i had to guess, i'd say the pepsi tastes like
peeps. ♪ ♪ because the peeps are in the pepsi ♪ ♪ and the pepsi's in the peeps ♪ ♪ pour a pint pound it down ♪ ♪ and then do tha on repeat ♪ ♪ plop plop fiz it's the perfect easter treat ♪ ♪ the pepsi packs a punch and the peeps provide the sweet ♪ ♪ peter piper picked a peck of pickled pepsi peeps ♪ ♪ polly pocket picked a pac of peppers in her sleep ♪ ♪ the peeps are so pleasin' pour the pepsi wet your beak ♪ ♪ but the peeps are in the pepsi ♪ ♪ wanna try i yes please ♪ [ cheers and applause ♪ pepsi and peeps fillin' your cup drink it on up ♪ >> pepsi and peeps mixtape 2023 [ cheers and applause [ air horn ] >> steve: oh, my gosh. >> jimmy: did you guys see this >> steve: what >> jimmy: did you guys see this starbucks just recalled bottles of their vanilla frappuccino because they could contain glass. meanwhile, if it was dunkin', they'd just relabel the bottles, chunky. [ laughter ]
get this, according to a new report, we've actually been pronouncing the names of several popular brands and companies wrong for decades. for example, adidas is actually pronounced "adi-das. it's true. and ikea should be pronounced the "e-kay-a." >> steve: come on. i already knew that. i knew that. >> jimmy: sorry, higgins you knew how those names are pronounced >> steve: yeah, i know how every brand name is pronounced because i'm an announcer and that's my job. so, go ahead and - [ cheers and applause thank you. go ahead and test me >> jimmy: you want me to - >> steve: give me some names >> jimmy: sure i guess i can test you quick what's this? >> steve: goat cheese. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay what's this? >> steve: bloomin' onion come on, give me -- give me some hard ones rapid fire them. >> jimmy: rapid fire okay, here we go what's this? >> steve: okay ham. [ laughter ] 'sup bro magic mike batman and robin's ben and j.lo
you go girl. oh, rihanna's pregnant [ laughter ] chinese spy balloon. [ laughter ] so call me maybe blue balls, i scream [ laughter ] hot tupac. bananas are pubic. herpes diarrhea enormous wrack [ laughter ] you want me to -- i can't believe you want me to read this one on tv >> jimmy: yeah >> steve: taint, balls, and ass. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, stop. stop turn his mic off just stop. get out of here. no, turn it off. >> steve: on a network show! that guy swore >> jimmy: i'm about to get security to get you out of here terrible >> steve: my gosh. >> jimmy: switching gears, this is fun today is national random acts of kindness day. [ cheers and applause i'm all for kindness i'm all for kindness, but the random part is kind of scary i don't need the guy next to me on the subway saying, "here, i made you a meat loaf." [ laughter ]
guys, listen to this, a boardwalk game operator at the jersey shore has been banned from running amusement games for allegedly overinflating basketballs. wait, wait, wait you're telling me those games are rigged [ laughter ] and finally, a lawyer is being sued after she allegedly spent more than $10 million of her company's money in las vegas [ audience oohs the law firm is trying to get their $10 million back while the woman says she's willing to settle for double or nothing [ cheers and applause we have a great show let's go write some thank you notes. come on, come on ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: what a show we have for you tonight. i do quickly want to say i'm so thankful we're at nine years of doing this show. and i want to thank you, steve higgins and the roots and our staff and crew thank you so much. [ cheers and applause and thank you everyone for supporting me and watching my show
i'm a very, very lucky guy thank you so much. [ cheers and applause we have a big show tonight he stars in the hit apple tv plus series, "severance. you can also see him in the comedy "party down," which premieres its third season next friday on starz. adam scott is here tonight [ cheers and applause one of my faves. love that guy. plus, she plays princess diana in the latest season of "the crown," which is streaming now on netflix elizabeth debicki is here. [ laughter ] and we've got great standup from nathan macintosh. hey, bud [ cheers and applause well, today is friday. that's usually when i catch up with some personal stuff you know, i check my inbox i return some emails and of course i send out thank you notes. [ cheers and applause and i was running a bit behind you guys mind if i write out some thank you notes right now is that okay [ cheers ] thank you very much. james, can i get some thank you note writing music, please ♪
it's like looking into your soul, yeah ♪ thank you, joe biden getting his annual physical, although it got weird when he turned, coughed, and more documents came out [ laughter and applause >> steve: what what ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, presidents' day, for letting us come together as a nation and celebrate what matters most to us all, cheap mattresses [ cheers and applause thank you, hacky sacks, for just being bean bag chairs that entered the quantum realm. [ laughter and applause ♪ thank you, sour cream, or as i call you, mean yogurt. [ laughter and applause >> steve: that's what you call
it you call it mean yogurt? >> jimmy: i call sour cream -- >> steve: mean yogurt. >> jimmy: i call it mean yogurt that's correct >> steve: wow. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, microwaves, for having the "door open" button, the "minute timer" button, and 40 other buttons i never use. [ laughter and applause butter defrost honey, do you need any butter defrosted? ah, forget it. sorry to wake you up, honey. should i defrost the butter? >> steve: it's 3:00 in the morning. >> jimmy: it's 5:00 somewhere. [ laughter ] ♪ thank you, showers, for being a great place to take a deep breath, relax, and think about how much i miss my phone [ laughter and applause ♪ thank you, scaffolding, for answering the question, "what if a building had braces?" [ laughter and applause
♪ thank you, pizza rollers, for looking like my kitchen knife hopped on a unicycle there you have it everybody. those are my "thank you notes. we'll be right back with the final day of "perm week. wow! [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: we have one more perm to give out. and tonight's lucky recipient is chris gultiano. this is going to be a good one audience, are you ready for the brand new, freshly permed chris? come on out! i prep without pills. with apretude a prescription med jicine used to reduce the risk of hiv without daily prep pills. with one shot every other month, just 6 times a year. in studies, apretude was proven superior to a daily prep pill in reducing the risk of hiv. you must be hiv negative to receive apretude
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show perm week." [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ it's perm wee on the fallon show it's perm week oh my god ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: this is "tonight show perm week," the very special week where every day we pick someone from our audience and stylishly perm their hair. we've been making the world a better place through perming all week here at "the tonight show."na d check a it outdiel o.mo h m mepeda qu t >> i'm chris scott and i'm getting a perm today >> this will be the craziest thing i'nive done to j my hairlo >> i'm a little nervous to get a perm but i'm very open to seange in my life.rm mi tsco tyler's hair, we lraovee oy n you.pa >> this will be a valentine's day we'll never forgett >> imy want to feel the wind in my hair. >> this perm is going to change the whole world.dehe jimmy: yo u guys reae dy for the brand new chris? come on out.
♪ wow!a mb i loveun it!o. judad ♪ i kinda dig it look at the curly girl come on. ♪ c ly>> i feel moincredible♪>>cele >> wow ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: what a week it's been, and we're not quite done yet. we have one more perm to give out. and tonight's lucky recipient is chris gultiano. chris is 32 years old -- yeah. [ light laughter ] this is going to be a good one he's from queens, and he's very excited about his new hairdo it's been a big day for chris. take a look. >> hi, i'm chris gultiano, and today i'm getting a perm this is actually my first time professionally styling my hair at all >> we're chris' friends -- >> and we can't wait to see his perm >> i've only known chris with long hair. he's like the rapunzel of queens to me >> so right now i feel like i came in looking like argyle from "stranger things" and my hope is to look like eddie munson by the end of it.
>> if you watch "stranger things" chris looks like argyle, and he's going to walk out looking like nancy >> so with my long hair, i love to do hair flips, so after i get the perm, i can't wait to do it for the first time >> the best part of this for chris is honestly a new life experience >> yes >> i feel like after i get this perm, it's going to show how i feel on the inside i can't wait to show the world what it feels like to be me. [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: yeah exactly right. now, chris has been sequestered since he got permed. so, he hasn't seen himself yet, and his friends haven't seen him either this entire process has been cloaked in secrecy [ light laughter ] we have his friends right here say hello, guys. how are you? >> hi, all [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: sorry, who is this blindfolded person >> this is chris' girlfriend, kayla. she couldn't be here tonight, so we brought her to you [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, that is so nice. >> no fomo here. >> jimmy: yeah, no fomo here
now, do not remove the blindfolds until i tell you, okay are you excited about this >> yes >> very. >> jimmy: how about you? are you excited? [ light laughter ] >> she's speechless. >> jimmy: okay wow. [ laughter ] >> so excited. [ laughter and applause >> jimmy: wow. audience, are you ready for the brand new, freshly permed chris? [ cheers and applause here is chris before, and here he is now! chris, come on out [ cheers and applause ♪ oh my god ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: wow. i love it. oh, my god you look great do you feel great? >> oh, i feel great, jimmy >> jimmy: you really feel great. oh my gosh guys, you're about to see -- here, hold my hand hold each others' hands. come on over and don't take the blindfolds
off. your girlfriend is here as well >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: yep. all right guys, on the count of three, remove your blindfolds. one, two, three. ♪ [ laughter ] ♪ oh my god ♪ [ cheers and applause >> kayla, you too. [ talking over each other >> jimmy: yeah, like -- what do you think? [ cheers and applause i love it. i think it looks really good now for the most important reveal of all. chris, are you ready to see yourself >> oh, i'm not ready >> jimmy: yeah, you're ready all right. three, two, one, reveal. [ cheers and applause ♪ oh my god ♪ >> yeah! oh, my god holy crap. >> jimmy: i like this chris. audience, you like it? [ cheers and applause our thanks to the randy darden hair salon for this wonderful perm happy perm week, everybody thank you. we'll be right back with
adam scott come on back [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ it's perm wee on the fallon show it's perm week >> jimmy: would you do me the honors >> can i please? >> jimmy: yeah, please [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: yeah, please [ cheers and applause ♪ t-mobile has the new samsung gala s23+ for free and price lock guarantee, do you? well... t-mobile will never raise my rates for talk, text and data - will you? well... well... - well... - well... ♪ well-well-well-well... well, well, wellllll! ♪ ♪ wellllll! ♪ well... yes. t-mobile has price lock guarantee and a free samsung galaxy s23+. switch to t-mobile and get a free samsung galaxy s23+ with no trade-in required. ♪ hey, it's just not right.
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and for me, it's one less thing to think about while traveling. don't receive cabenuva if you're allergic to its ingredients or if you taking certain medicines, which may interact with cabenuva. serious side effects include allergic reactions post-injection reactions, liver problems, and depression. if you have a rash and other allergic reaction symptoms, stop cabenuva and get medical help right away. tell your doctor if you have liver problems or mental health concerns, and if you are pregnant, breastfeeding, or considering pregnancy. some of the most common side effects include injection-site reactions, fever, and tiredness. if you switch to cabenuva, attend all treatment appointments. ready to treat your hiv in a different way? ask your doctor about every-other-month cabenuva. with every-other-month cabenuva, i'm good to go. ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: our first guest stars on season one of the highly acclaimed series, "severance," which is streaming now on apple
tv plus. you can also see him in the comedy "party down," which premieres it's third season next friday on starz please welcome adam scott. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: that's adam scott. [ cheers and applause you've got some love out there hey, you've got some love out there. come on. that's adam scott. >> that's so nice. >> jimmy: welcome. that's what i'm talking about. that's - [ cheers and applause welcome back to the show >> thank you >> jimmy: thank you so much for coming on. >> thanks, man thanks for having me >> jimmy: how is the fam i was very lucky to meet your beautiful daughter backstage >> yeah. frankie came with me >> jimmy: good kid >> she's a great kid you know, most of the time, she's a great kid. she -- [ laughter ] she's 14, you know so, like, i'm here in new york because i'm working. i'm shooting season two of "severance." [ cheers and applause
oh, thank you. but my family lives in los angeles. so, we spend a ton of time on facetime, you know, like constantly because it's terrible being on opposite sides of the country. >> jimmy: yeah >> it's hard so, we're always talking on facetime but my daughter, frankie, who you just met, she is constantly taking screenshots of me, of, like, my face. because when you're doing facetime, it's not like you're on a fancy zoom and you have a a ring light and you primp yourself you're, like, getting ready for bed, or eating, or whatever. >> jimmy: yeah, it's family time yeah >> it's family time. and she -- every -- every single time i see that flash on the screen it's just like, "jesus, really?" and, so, this past year, they made a calendar of all those photos they collected them. [ laughter ] and made a calendar of -
>> jimmy: of unflattering photos of you. you brought a few here i just want to show them on national tv if you don't mind. >> sure. [ laughter ] yeah, that would be great. [ cheers and applause that would be great. >> jimmy: these are some of the screenshots right here >> yeah. [ laughter ] nice nice >> jimmy: what a great family. >> yeah. it's nice. >> jimmy: what a lovely family >> you know -- [ cheers and applause thanks i feel like everyone -- everyone looks great when they're blowing their nose [ laughter ] >> jimmy: everyone does. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i'm just so excited that you're here, and that you're here during a very important time it's perm week on "the tonight show." have you ever done a perm or thought about it >> i really -- i mean, in the '80s, it seemed like -- men were getting perms guys that hosted, like, afternoon talk shows had perms >> jimmy: of course. i remember >> like, gary collins would have a perm. >> jimmy: he did have one, yeah adam curry, i think, right >> yeah, sure, adam curry.
>> jimmy: i found an old head shot of you. not permed just kind of cool, i would say >> this is my first head shot, i believe. >> jimmy: this feels '90s, right? >> it's '90s it's like -- >> jimmy: who do you look like here >> oh, my god. you know, listen - [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow, you look good >> it's like - [ cheers and applause don't clap you can't clap for that. my hair is like a cross between eddie vedder and natalie merchant [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i like your pose how does one even -- >> oh, my god. it's so terrible it's so -- >> jimmy: that looks difficult >> i mean, that is -- that is -- that is, like, profoundly bad. [ laughter ] that's -- that's really tough. >> jimmy: i love it. i just didn't want you to feel - >> oh, my god. >> jimmy: --left out. >> yeah, for sure. >> jimmy: so i - >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: would you do me the honors >> can i please? [ cheers and applause ♪ [ cheers and applause
>> i love it >> jimmy: it's good. >> i love it >> jimmy: it's good, right >> it's so - >> jimmy: this feels right >> i feel like my life coming together >> jimmy: yeah, you're getting what chris was feeling earlier >> yes >> jimmy: and you're getting a a little taste of it now >> that's right. >> jimmy: can we talk about "party down? >> yeah. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah >> jimmy: please, this has been -- i miss this. this has been -- we're just going to leave the wigs on >> yeah, we're not taking these off. >> jimmy: 13 years >> 13 years since we got cancelled in 2010. >> jimmy: but -- what was it was it just streaming that made it popular again >> i guess so. because when we finished -- when we were cancelled, we were cancelled for, like, pretty good reason, i guess because our ratings were literally 0.0. >> jimmy: no one was watching. [ laughter ] no one was watching your show. >> no. no so, you end up getting cancelled. >> jimmy: that's what happens when no one watches your show. >> but little by little, over
the years, people got into it. and now i get asked about it, just like, out on the street or whatever, i'll get asked about it just as much as anything else >> jimmy: really >> yeah, yeah, it's great. >> jimmy: but everyone came back for it. >> yeah, everyone. lizzy caplan, because of scheduling, couldn't do it but everyone else -- jane lynch, ken marino, megan mullally, ryan hansen, martin starr, everybody. >> jimmy: but then, who -- jennifer garner. >> jennifer garner joins the show >> jimmy: i love jennifer garner. [ cheers and applause >> she's amazing >> jimmy: i can't get enough jennifer garner. i love her >> she's the best. >> jimmy: i'm so happy it's back i want to show a clip. here's adam scott in the new season of "party down. take a look. >> i accept the possibility that i pimrobably wonn't be oscleciated in my lifetimevu yolau know, ifot i get disi cov, as thetey're reviedewing my papd e after i di se, well, ici'll bn widath that.bensub eev >> so you're still doing mostly hard sci-fi?ni jlo >> yeah. you remember the magnum opus that i started on a roll of i ilet ppeaperueirbiren sc nuhen-uh.o well, tha t was juster theots embeginning.une icand i'm just kind of tweaking one little thing, but then it's ready to sell. and i still have my blog, well, jwhich is nloow a vlog 'cause my carpal tunnel incident.uefuli
>> cool.ghimn i should probably go and have dinner >> yeah, see you in 12 years [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: you're so good, man. >> thanks, man >> jimmy: you make me laugh. congrats on the great reviews as well. >> thank you >> jimmy: adam scott, everybody. "party down" premieres it's third season next friday on starz. frankie, keep it up. that's a good job. we'll be right back with more "tonight show," everybody. good job, frankie. [ cheers and applause ♪ [heavy bass beat of "we run this" surges in] [voice of missy elliott] ♪ believe it! ♪ ♪ ho! hah! ♪ ♪♪ [record scratches] wait. i can erase my exes? [music resumes] ♪ yeah we run it ♪ ♪ and yeah we run it ♪
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a golden globe nominated actor who you can see in the latest season of "the crown," which is streaming now on netflix everyone, please welcome elizabeth debicki. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: elizabeth debicki. ♪ [ cheers and applause ah, i'm so happy you're here it is lovely to meet you >> it's lovely to meet you >> jimmy: thank you for being on the show. it is perm week. i'm sure you've heard. [ light laughter ] >> and saw >> jimmy: yeah, and saw, as well, yeah have you ever had a perm i think you may -- can i guess i think you might have had one >> i -- i've had a perm. >> jimmy: you have [ light laughter ] you're allowed to talk about it >> i am. it's slightly traumatic. >> jimmy: oh, it is? >> well, it is well, so -- i can't even believe i'm actually - i've never really told anyone this story but i -- [ light laughter ] i was, a few years ago going through a very bad breakup
i'm telling this story because what i would like to do is sort of start a sort of form of activism against hairdressers allowing to do perms on people who are going through a breakup. [ laughter and applause it's real. >> jimmy: it's a real thing. >> it's so real. >> jimmy: you're saying that they should ask you before they give you the - >> i think there should -- i think there should be a law that if you sit -- [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: a law? >> a law, yes. you pass loads of laws in this country. >> jimmy: yes, we do, yes. [ light laughter ] >> pass another one. >> jimmy: we try, yeah >> yeah, so if you sit down in a chair in a hair salon, and they say -- and you say, "hello, i would like a perm" - >> jimmy: mm-hm. >> the person has to say, "are you going through a terrible breakup? [ laughter ] and if you say yes, they can't -- >> jimmy: they escort you to leave. >> they say, "we can give you a trim." [ laughter and applause little trim. >> jimmy: i gotta say, you were phenomenal in "the crown." congratulations on all the accolades. [ cheers and applause golden globe you were nominated for two s.a.g. awards coming up. congratulations on this. are -- do you enjoy going to these award shows?
>> i do enjoy them, but i get very nervous >> jimmy: you do >> in rooms full of -- yeah, well, there's like so many famous people, it's kind of strange, you know [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah >> and i'd never been to the golden globes before i took my little sister, who is a trooper, a very calm person. but we were -- we super, super jet lagged, 'cause we just got in >> jimmy: yeah >> and the next day we were thinking about it, and we -- 'cause we didn't -- i didn't really meet that many people and i was thinking, "why didn't i -- what was i doing? and then i realized that we basically were like, treating it like we were in a a jane austen novel. we didn't get up once and everyone just walked past our table and we sort of went, "thank you for coming. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you ever see yourself or think like, "oh, maybe, like, one day i could play princess diana" >> no. no [ laughter ] >> jimmy: never? >> no. >> jimmy: never? >> i never -- no i never saw a resemblance really, no >> jimmy: yeah well let me show everyone a picture. this is you as princess diana and then the real princess diana [ cheers and applause i mean, kind of insane that's unbelievable.
it -- did it -- that's fantastic. >> yeah. >> jimmy: so, you go into the audition did you know that you were auditioning for diana? >> so, it's a weird story. i knew, in a kind of vague way, that i was going to play this part for very -- like, five years. so, i went in and did an audition for a part in season two. >> jimmy: of "the crown. >> of "the crown." and season one had just come out and it was a really big hit and everyone was, rightly so, very excited my agent called me up and said, "well just go in --" basically -- i was so physically wrong for this part and so i went in and i did this pretty bad audition, you know. they kind of stopped me and they were like, "thank -- we'll call you thank you so much," you know >> jimmy: oh, that is the worst. >> brutal. so then i left and then i got an email, this sort of ambiguous email like the next day saying, definitely not that part, but maybe diana but it was about -- you know, it was, like, five years in the pipeline >> jimmy: so that means you have to wait five years for them to remember that you auditioned >> i know, but i didn't really
think it was gonna happen. >> jimmy: yeah, usually it doesn't happen to be honest. >> well, that's the thing, that's the thing and then when i bring this up with the producers and i say, you know - it was like, five years of hell, where i was like, "please, god, let this come along. and they all said, "oh, no, we always knew it would be you. and i think "'we' -- like, 'we' what 'we'? >> jimmy: no, yeah, what "we"? yeah, you -- >> royal we. >> jimmy: my -- "me, i did not," yeah >> no, no. >> jimmy: you were phenomenal in this. i want everybody to watch "the crown." i want to show a clip right now. here's elizabeth debicki in "the crown."ar the ke a look.ip a. >> what's this about us going home >> it turns out there's a diary conflict through no vifault of e de tan mine, and i have to get back >> we're supposed to be here for two weeks. >> yesct, i know, dimoana.de you but plans change i have a commitment at oxford university >> it isn't the universityo os it's a summer school for tourists, it's not essential >> it is to meshal >> this is our holiday it's a rare opportunity for us to be together with the boys asi
a familyim and i know you struggle with that sort of thing, which is why i agreed you bringing your trignds along to entertain you e and i treven agreed to do the photo call today, requested by your people so the lie could be paraded to the world's media about what an adoring husband co you hare on one ctaonditionr sa ed>> what's thats om >> that you actually are one >> jimmy: ooh. elizabeth debicki! [ cheers and applause all seasons of "the crown" are available now on netflix more "tonight show" after the break, everyone. stick around [ cheers and applause make that a law! make that a law! [ cheers and applause ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: our next guest has his comedy special, "money never wakes" available on youtube. please welcome the very funny nathan macintosh [ cheers and applause ♪ >> hey [ cheers and applause hey. hey, everybody [ cheers and applause hi it's so great to be here i'm -- right now i'm trying to figure my life out every single person i know is starting a family. i'm losing a lot of friends to babies [ laughter ] i should actually say i'm losing city friends. i'm getting my small-town friends back 'cause their kids are now 18 [ laughter ] people in small towns just start families younger, right? and of course, they do they're bored. [ light laughter ] there's nothing to do in a a small town i feel people in a small town just wake up one day, and look at each other like, "look, i don't know you want to go see the trees again? [ laughter ] "we've already seen the trees. we counted them, we measured them." "well, we can make new people and show them the trees.
[ light laughter ] one huge advantage if you have a baby in a small town, you have space you have a house and a yard. i have friends in this city that are having a baby in a studio apartment [ light laughter ] an apartment so small that if they get too many groceries, they have to throw a chair out [ laughter ] the only good thing about a city apartment is your baby can't just wander off. you're not gonna lose them like, "where's chris?" "what do you mean 'where's chris? he's in the west wing. what do you mean 'where's chris?'" [ laughter ] "our oven and shower touch." [ laughter and applause i don't know that a lot of people are taking -- so everybody wants you to hold their baby, right? every single person wants you to hold their baby why? it's the most precious thing you have why are you putting it in my hands? [ light laughter ] people will step over a glass coffee table covered in candles to hand you the most breakable thing they have. [ laughter ] nobody wants you to touch their phone. not one person [ laughter and applause
and i honestly don't -- it bothers me i don't think a lot of people are taking it seriously. 'cause everybody says they're having a baby, right everybody says, "baby," as if that's all it's ever going to be babies grow up i really wish people said, they were having "a future adult. [ laughter ] because one day it's a baby, and the next day, it's a guy named doug [ laughter ] and doug is a grown man standing in your kitchen, drinking your juice, and he wants money. [ laughter and applause there's a lot of people that aren't ready to have a baby, right? so, they got a dog as a training baby. [ light laughter ] and they call it a fur baby. and honest to god, if you call your dog a fur baby, do not have a skin baby because you - [ laughter and applause you're not taking it seriously at all and having a dog might be harder sometimes i have a tiny little chihuahua and it's horrifying.
i don't know if anybody's ever walked a chihuahua it's scary walking a chihuahua is like walking a carton of eggs [ laughter ] any single thing can go wrong. i've gotta be on the lookout for other dogs, people, blowing leaves, everything [ laughter ] i don't think people pushing strollers are worried that a a hawk is gonna come out of the sky and take their baby. but i have vivid thoughts about chopping a bird out of the air like, "not today, hawk!" [ laughter and applause "i -- i just bought her that sweater. [ laughter ] which i never thought i'd ever be doing i never thought i'd be buying a coat for a tiny little dog i never thought i'd be in a store like, "she'd never wear green. just pushing sweaters out of the way. [ laughter ] but you have to get clothes for a chihuahua. because if you take a chihuahua out in the cold without a coat, they freeze. they stop living right there [ laughter ]
and then you're a maniac just dragging a frozen dog down the street [ laughter ] people are like, "what happened?" "'what happened? she's supposed to be in mexico!" [ laughter and applause also, when you get a dog, there's so many places you can't live anymore, right? 'cause so many apartments saying no pets and you want to get mad at a a landlord, like they're just making up these crazy rules, but people ruined the pet rule 'cause most people when they hear pets are like, "oh, yeah, pets like a cat or a dog. but some people, hear pets, and they go, "oh." [ light laughter ] "python. [ laughter ] and then one day there's a a 40-foot snake roaming the halls trying to eat your neighbors because somebody doesn't know what a pet is [ light laughter ] a pet is something you can pet [ laughter and applause you -- you put your hand on its
head and you pet it. it's not a creature you fight with a stick back into a cage. [ laughter ] it's not something you kick off a river boat [ laughter ] it's not something a wizard puts on a staff. it's -- it's a cute animal with a fur, not something samuel l. jackson fought on a plane. [ laughter ] there's so many apartments that say, "no pets. there's not one apartment that says, "no babies." not one. [ light laughter ] and why? my dog is five pounds for life you don't know what this baby's gonna to be. [ laughter ] this baby could grow into a 6'5" smoker that steals packages you don't know [ laughter ] my dog is doing nothing. she's sitting there, shivering, looking out the window for hawks. [ laughter and applause my name is nathan macintosh. thank you so much. ♪ i really appreciate it thank you, thank you, thank you. thank you. >> jimmy: holy mackerel. ♪ >> thank you, man. >> jimmy: holy moly. >> really appreciate it. appreciate it. >> jimmy: that's exactly right standing ovation >> aw, thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: and that is how you
do it right there. >> thank you [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: nathan macintosh >> thank you, thank you. [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: that is how you do it >> appreciate you guys >> jimmy: "money never wakes" is available on youtube. we'll be right back. that was phenomenal. [ cheers and applause ♪
"the doctor will see you now." but do they really? do they see that crick in your neck? that ache in your heart? will they see that funny little thing that wasn't there last year? a new bounce in your step? the way your retinal scan connects to your blood sugar? at kaiser permanente all of us work together to care for all that is you.
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: my thanks to adam scott, elizabeth debicki, nathan macintosh once again. [ cheers and applause >> thank you, appreciate that. >> jimmy: phenomenal job, bud. unbelievable, buddy. please come back and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applause thank you for watching
stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers. goodnight, everybody ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it n's "late nh ight r seth meyers. tonight -- reese witherspoon. nh er star of "girls5eva," actress and comedian paula pell.htth cooking with chef michael solomonov. featuring the 8g band with fred armisen ♪ [ cheers and applause and now, seth meyers >> seth: good evening. good evening, i'm seth meyers, and this is "late night. we hope you're all doing well tonight. and now if you don't mind, we're going to get to the news president biden delivered his second state of the union address tonight. oh, you mean his balloon assassination victory lap? [ laughter ]