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tv   Today  NBC  September 14, 2013 2:05am-3:00am EDT

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o'kelly sounds like he's got the smarts of topsy, the gumption of brooklyn, and the moxie of fat brooklyn. he's like all my old dead friends rolled into one big, live friend. yes. to brooklyn. absolutely. look, i don't know anything about this o'kelly guy, but you were in a sales- pressure-induced daze and they made you sign something you didn't understand. we'll get you out of this. i don't want out. damn it, boy, quit acting like a doorjamb and get onboard. maybe you should think about it, colonel hill. our policy here is, if you decide you don't want to live life to the fullest, you got 12 hours to back out. in the meantime, why don't you enjoy a bite at one of our world-class restaurants? here are some owners' coupons for 10% off. you see that, boy? what do you get with your precious aaa card? they don't even take those here.
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isn't it beautiful? ( barking ) ( shrieking ) last time i was here, they were puppies. now, which one of you is scamp? that hair dryer, mine. copy of leisure properties monthly-- mine. looky here, they got the water that don't give you the hot poops. swanky. look, i admit, it's a great room, but i saw an ad that anyone can rent the same o'kelly suite for $35 a night. you're paying three times that. come here, hank. do you know what's out there? o'kelly's private yacht, manned 24 hours a day by the creme de la crème of the mexican navy. got a private chef used to work for cantinflas. hank: i don't see anything. that's 'cause you're looking with renter's eyes.
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i think i see it. you get in good with o'kelly, you get on that yacht. that's the kind of lifestyle you buy into here at el grande vista. but you're not really buying. it says in their own brochure-- americans can not own land in mexico. if i don't own anything, why am i paying all these maintenance fees and property taxes? good point. you've still got ten hours to get out, dad. i ain't getting out of anything. i like it here. fatty, let's go to the owner's pool. just pour it in the snorkel. pour it... yeah, becoming an owner was the best thing i did with the money i inherited. i should have brought topsy's ashes down here and spread them over a señorita. ( laughing ) all right, all right. rich, you're all right, all right,
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but you know what i don't get? hank was saying if you buy a timeshare in mexico, you can't even own it 'cause you're a foreigner. how can you buy something that you can't own? why, that's true. my son is a jackass and a killjoy, but that is a puzzler. bill, why don't you get us some chips and salsa? can do. so level with me, rich. is it true? colonel, i wasn't supposed to tell you this, because you're not an owner yet, but you've already been hand-picked by o'kelly to join his el presidente circle. it's an elite group of owners. very exclusive. you'd have a condo on el presidente island. use of o'kelly's helicopter, humidor privileges, oh... you'll receive your own el presidente medal of achievement. it all happens aboard o'kelly's yacht tomorrow night-- assuming you decide to stay. hand-picked, eh? yeah, i could chew that over. uh... your friend.
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i don't know how to put this. o'kelly's yacht may be big, but there's not always room on it for everyone. fatty! sir, yes, sir! i'm done with you. get packin'. yeah, but... sir, please swim to the shallow end. dad! dad! sir, please stop that. ( playing mariachi music ) ( sobbing ) bill? your dad doesn't need me anymore. he dumped me for o'kelly. bill, i've only got a couple of hours to get my dad out of this deal, and i can't do it alone. i need you. ( playing festive music )
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rich: colonel, your cabeza es muy grande. hurry up, bill. they're measuring my dad for a sombrero. i'm almost through, i'm almost through. i'm... ow! there's the fence. dang it, we'll never get to him in time. he's gonna lose every penny. maybe we should just give up and let him enjoy himself. i mean, a month ago he didn't even have that money. no, this is important. i can't let him get ripped off. beautiful, colonel. very authentic. i came down here to protect my dad and damn it, that's what i'm going to do. we've gotta get to rich. bill: just look out for those guys in the feathers. they worked me over pretty good after they kicked me out of the pool. leave this to me. i'll distract them. i am going to go and eat some of o'kelly's penguins!
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( sighs ) americans cannot own land in mexico! americans cannot own land in mexico. i'm sorry, he's not a member. okay, you little weasel, i'm not letting you steal any more of my dad's money. steal? hank, your dad is an adult. he has a right to spend his own money and this is how he wants to spend it. but he doesn't even have anything. he lives in an apartment and only gets $300 a month pension. he can't even afford real cheerios. he eats something called oat loops. it's made right around here. what? but then... how can we raise his monthly ownership dues? and if he's not a homeowner, then... what are we going to foreclose on? fine. you want your dad out of this? he's out.
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dad? you there? i've got something to talk about with you. which cufflinks do you think o'kelly would like more? the ones that look like bosoms? or the ones that look like guns? why're you all dressed up? you only become el presidente once, boy. i want to look sharp tomorrow night when i board o'kelly's yacht and the great man himself hands me my el presidente medal of achievement. uh... that's why i came by. i, uh... i gotta admit, hank. since all my buddies kicked off, things just ain't felt right, but now i gots me some place where i belong. uh, yeah. we need to talk about that. nothing to talk about. i was born. i lived. then i got to be el presidente
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and that made it all worthwhile. king of the hill is brought to you in part by... could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. yep, everybody knows that. well, did you know some owls aren't that wise? don't forget i'm having brunch with meghan tomorrow. who? meghan, my coworker. who? seriously? you've met her like three times. who? (sighs) geico. fifteen minutes could save you...well, you know. wherever your sutwist the ride... with twizzlers. the twist you can't resist.
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( sighs ): i tried to help my dad and i've made everything worse. meeting o'kelly has become his whole reason for living. i got hit in the head, hank. i can't hear too well.
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is this butter or water? may i have your coupons, please? uh, we don't have any coupons. then... what are you doing here? tapado, no van a creer lo que he visto! he's going to be devastated when he can't get on that damn yacht. i'm not gonna let this happen. i'm going to the one place that can get something done about it. mr. hill, i've had a lot of complaints about timeshares, but they're pretty tough contracts to get out of. no, i already got him out of his contract. the problem is my dad wants to be an el presidente- level member. oh. and they won't let him in because he's... why won't they let him in? because you can't be an el presidente member unless you buy a timeshare. so you want me to get your father into el presidente for free? yeah, that would be great. i got it! why don't we slap an embargo on all of mexico till rich lets him in? you know, starve 'em out.
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i'm kidding, mr. hill. peggy: well, hello there. we are your new next door neighbors. you're gonna love us! what happened to the petersons? unclear. so, what do you say, how about a swim, neighbor? neighbor? neighbor?! neighbor! what do you mean, i ain't on the list? i'm sorry, colonel. this is very awkward. awkward? awkward is me slicing your belly open! now, let me on that yacht! but i was hand-picked by o'kelly. oh. you just can't beat these guys, hank. yeah, well, i gotta find some way to get inside there. ( sighs ) i'm off to urinate on the statue of o'kelly!
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( wild yell ) don't touch...! ( muffled yelling ) look, rich, i know i asked you to let my dad out of that timeshare, but i didn't realize how much el presidente meant to him. can you just let him back in so he can get on that boat tonight? i'd love to, hank, but i don't know. there's a lot of paperwork to do, not to mention some pretty steep express- processing fees. ( sniffs ) but maybe there is way we could overlook all that. yeah? if cotton recommended someone who bought, say, a week at el grande vista, maybe o'kelly would reconsider him. oh, god. oh, no. hank, how much do you spend on a typical vacation? ( sighs deeply ) jimmy: i can't thank you enough, mr. hill. i was about to lose my job. and my wife...
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save it, jim. he's in the bag. great. sign here, here, and here. yep. yep. ( men laughing ) hey, dad. so, how was el presidente? did you get to meet o'kelly? i wish i could tell you, boy, but code of the el presidente. what happens on that yacht stays on that yacht. hey, rich told me you were gonna buy a week here at the vista! hell, that's great news! that's right, dad. well, i'll leave you two owners. please accept these coupons for soup and half a sandwich. look how beautiful it is, boy. i told you i knew how to spend that money. hell, topsy couldn't have spent it better himself. you're right about that, dad. this was a great investment, i tell you what. bill: but, hank, i thought you said americans can't own land in mexico... ( pained grunt ) hank: a great investment.
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captioned by media access group at wgbh
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bill: just pour it in the snorkel pour it...!
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shocking new video, nicole kidman mowed down by a photog. now on "extra." nicole violently knocked do tot ground in her designer dress. the moment by moment disaster all caught on camera. lindsey's mom, dina, busted for drunk driving. how loaded was she and did lindsey bail her out? more on the seaside heights inferno. >> we were just on that boardwalk and it is just crazy. now trending, where we just spotted kim and kanye together for the first time in weeks. hugh jackman auditioning to be an "extra" reporter.
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>> here on the red carpet. how did you feel about doing all those nude scenes? new york fashion week, "extra" style. the stars, the shows, the number one hot color for spring. plus -- >> dancing judge bruno is here for an interview with me today. you will never guess where he found him. bruno? >> el conquistador. this is "extra" from universal studios hollywood, the entertainment capital of l.a. >> welcome to "extra." i'm mario lopez. >> i'm maria menounos. dina lohan arrested for drinking and driving. what she accused the cops of doing during the bust. a lot of drama for that family, glad to one was hurt. first, nicole kidman run down by a paparazzo on a bike p. >> cameras caught the entire head-on collision. jerry has the video and nicole's first words right after. >> smashed, spun around, slammed to the ground. [ bleep ]
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>> the frightening moment of impact caught on tape! the angry oscar winner threatening to press charges. >> i want to get his name. >> now "extra" with nicole's first words on her new york paparazzo crash. >> i am. i'm up. i'm walking around, but i was shaken. >> shaken right out of one designer stiletto. the photog laid out on the sidewalk. the oscar winner hobbling into her hotel. her right foot barefoot. and this is how it all went down. nicole in town for fashion week. when one comes racing up the sidewalk on his bike, smacking right into nicole. crashed into nicole kidman! the photog, carl wu, immediately apologizing. >> i'm so sorry, i tried to brake! >> threatening legal action moments after the crash. >> i want to get his name. and
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press charges. >> paramedics rushed to the hotel. nicole wasn't seriously hurt. and a few hours later walked the calvin klein red carpet. >> i've just left that up to the police and everything. >> this not nicole's first run in, scolding a snapper at her 2005 "bewitched" premiere. and this is not wu's first star chaser controversy. reportedly shoved by one of gaga's bodyguards after trailing her into a parking garage. >> i'm so sorry. i'm so sorry. >> this time cited for reckless driving, riding his bike on the sidewalk. fortunate this wasn't much worse! >> crazy accident. i'm glad she is okay. >> yeah, and the paparazzi makes it worse. dina was just arrested for dwi. >> pulled over for speeding, kirding to police, she was pretty drunk. we have got the latest. >> her eyes droopy, her lips, almost smirking. this is what point 20 looks like. dina lohan pulling a lindsay lohan, mugging for new york state troopers after being busted for dwi in long island last night. lohan's blood alcohol level
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twice the legal limit. she reportedly claimed cops hurt her during the arrest but later recanted after paramedics found no injuries. remember, deep nah was accused of being under the influence during this dr. phil interview. >> let's talk about -- >> are we to camera now, rolling? i'm sorry. okay. >> she denied being drunk, her ex, michael, reacting to dina's new mugshot. >> that hurts to see t as sad as it is, it can work out for her benefit like it did for me, like it did for lindsey and sometimes you have to have that epiphany in your life that arrest or that one experience that will, you know, make you turn it around. >> dina has been bailed out but not by lindsey. she is due back in court later this month. kim and kanye spotted together for the first time in weeks. all new pics. kim-ye snapped checking in on their $11 million bel air dream home. kim, still blonde. her shrinking body after baby in an all-white ensemble for the construction tour.
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just a terrible scene. the jersey shore boardwalk going up in flames, aj. >> yeah, heartbreaking video. the boardwalk in seaside park just recovering from the damage caused by hurricane sandy and now this. the fire reportedly started in a custard shop and quickly got out of control, tearing through more than 30 businesses and spreading to seaside heights where "jersey shore" was filmed. snooki taking time from her "dancing with the stars" prep share her emotions. >> they just rebuilt everything and now it's all gone again. they have the worst luck ever. it's so sad. i feel terrible. linda ronstadt just revealed she's battling parkinson's. ♪ >> now the iconic singer sharing her story on "world news with diane sawyer." >> another parkinson's person said life after death isn't the question. it's life before death. so what are you gonna live? how are you gonna do it? >> ronstadt's interview tonight on abc.
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spent one of the night with the coolest, sweetest guys hollywood, your fellow aussie, hugh jackman. >> good accent. he truly is the best, 15 minutes into the interview, he turned the table on me. he can work the carpet and the mic. >> here on the red carpet. >> hugh jackman hijacking his own interview. >> one of these days, we'll get rid of this little fence. and we can actually be connected. >> i think we should. that would be amazing. >> we'll be back right after the break with the news? >> actually, you and jake are the story. >> hugh, playing a dad of one of two missing kids. >> we're running out of time. >> jake, the detective out to find them. >> we're considering all possibilities. >> i don't think you are considering all possibilities. >> both guys protective of their real-life loved ones. >> i take pride in that. when you have people that you love enough to feel the sense to want to protect and keep them safe from things. >> hugh and his wife, deborra lee, who have two kids. >> after doing this movie, i'm holding them a little closer, that's for sure. >> it's not really a normal situation, so i do really have
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to protect in that way as much as i can. my son hates it. he's always hated it. my daughter sometimes loves it, which probably worries me more, >> hugh's wife, his toughest film critic. >> she's very honest with me and always gives it to me straight. that's probably why we've been together 18 years. no bs. that's our rule. >> jake's rule when it comes to magazine covers? look hot and mysterious. >> what does v-man stand for? >> uh, very, very -- man. >> what are you channeling for this image? >> i was blank. i was vacant. >> this is you vacant? >> you're, like, give me something. if that's you with nothing, give me something. >> i know you guys developed a bit of a bromance. >> yeah. >> he said that you're so nice that you -- >> he pisses lemonade. >> that was my secret. >> no secret about this, "prisoners" in theaters september 20th. hugh is the best and on monday, he joins me here at universal studios hollywood. what his dads think of him the actor and why he couldn't stop punching him in the stomach. now throw it over to mario,
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another one of our favorite stars. >> i never quite know what to expect when this next guy stops by and that's just the way i like it. "dancing with the stars" judge bruno tonioli get up here. good to see you, you look good. >> expect the unexpected! >> bruno always one of my favorite stars to interview, he's truly unpredictable. >> i feel like i'm getting impregnated just looking at you. >> well, don't get too close. "dancing with the stars" getting close, a major shakeup for their 17th season, the show coming to you only one night a week, turning the intensity up. this is a new season. it's got a lot of interesting stars and new changes, so what
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are your thoughts? it's going to be even more exciting than ever. >> it's much more interactive. the celebrities will be sitting next to the judges, can you imagine? >> oh, there will be so much trouble, so they wont be in that balcony? >> no, that's gone. >> you have two of my former "saved by the bell" castmates on the show. if they take anything from you, they'll be good. leah remini and elizabeth berkley, of course. what do you think of "showgirls"? >> oh, i love it! i'm wearing versace. >> who are you most intrigued to see dance? >> well, you know that but you won't come back. okay, fine, bruno, a little salsa just for you. >> queen latifah, john travolta, "hairspray." bff's re-united! >> you guys are warming up already? >> warming up and sitting down
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exclusively with "extra"! >> welcome to the queen latifah show! >> giving us the only invite to the set of her new daytime talk show! >> you make up in the morning and go, damn, i am me. >> dancing, laughing and why john is singing this. then, breaking couples news, john legend and chrissy teigen'sity tallian escape. >> we have got all the details on their weekend wedding. scarlett johansson shows office her engagement sparkler. >> i'll very happy. >> coming up. online now, a sneak peek at tonight's hello ross on e. >> what a lovely couple. >> joey fatone and lance bass talking about their "vma" reunion and lapse's engagement. the previews at
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he and queen latifa talked about a song i don't think i will forget. >> queen latifa, john travolta,
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"hairspray" bffs reunited. warmed up already? warming up and sitting down exclusively with "extra." giving up the only invite to the set of her new daytime talk show. this is your first guest? >> my first guest. >> exciting. >> pretty huge. >> suspect he gorgeous? >> i'm okay. she is gorgeous. >> this is the perfect collaboration. >> it is wonderful. >> the queen pulling out all the stops for her return to daytime. even bringing jada pinkett smith on board as her executive producer. >> it's great to have people i've been friends with for a long time who i trust. saves me work too, so i can focus on spending time with wonderful people like this guy here. >> i think it's the most exciting thing to happen to daytime television in years! >> you got that? did you get that? >> and get this, her gorgeous new set designed by lenny kravitz! >> really? wow! >> he has unbelievable design skills and he was really able to tap into my vibe. >> now, john being the first interview, did you prepare for this?
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>> no, we're gonna play it by ear, ya know! >> first question. do you wake up in the morning, and go, "damn i am me"? >> next question? >> gotta be about teamin' up in "hairspray!" >> you don't have to rush off ya know. >> i do, i left my iron on. one of my favorite moves, after you introduce me to all the food, that little side step we both do? >> oh, i love that! >> i don't know what it is about that simple step, but we both -- >> and it made me laugh every single time we did it. >> both of them cracking up when john brought up his boy, benjamin. >> he's 2 1/2 and he's making up verses, mostly about bathroom stuff. ♪ ♪ my poopie! exactly in the toilet look! ♪ ♪ i poo in the noon i poo in the afternoon and i poo under the moon ♪ >> don't tell me he's a poo crooner! >> we can tell you this, "the queen latifah show" premieres monday! also back on monday, season two of steve harvey's talk show. i saw a preview where he jousts someone inside giant inflatable balls. we gotta get those out here. >> yeah we do. the big rumor now is that my
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friends john legend and chrissy teigen are getting married this weekend and that their wedding xak a carrot cake? >> not traditional, but i love me some carrot cake. hey it is your wedding, you should be able to do whatever you want. >> agreed. final countdown to a legendary italian wedding. all new pics, john legend and fiancee chrissy tegen in naples, italy, shooting a sexy new video for the song john wrote about her, "all of me"
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>> tomorrow they're reportedly for george clooneys. working with bobby? >> yeah. it was awesome.'s. working with bobby? >> yeah. it was awesome. on my bucket list of actors to work with. >> we'd nice time. at our universal studios hollywood home, patrick wilson and rose burden of proof premiering their supernatural scare fest in "insidious" chapter two. >> guy insane, not for the faint of heart. >> something wrong. >> what made you want to return to this haunting world? >> i felt there's another story in here and let's just go for it. i am so happy to be here with the first lady. >> eva longoria and michelle obama taking over watertown high school in watertown, wisconsin, for the first lady's campaign to get kids to drink more water. >> just catching up, i hadn't seen her since the election.
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so, what's cuter than beth stern? beth stern holding a kitten, of course. howard's stunning other half with aj in new york, talking about the couple's passion project, north shore animal league america. >> it's been really rewarding, being a foster parent, i really, really love t. >> find out how you can help at coming up, all new video, princess kate's first red carpet since giving birth. >> her head-to-toe fashion break down and how much she paid for the gown. plus, extra's elar ya baldwin at new york fashion week with every hot trend for spring from clothes to hair to makeup. that's next.
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back here at universal studios hollywood with new video of kate middle top's one-woman fashion show in london last night. >> it was her first red carpet since the baby, of course, her body looks amazing. i actually want to steal her look for next week's emmys. >> you can pull it off. >> it was gorgeous, right? $4,000 jenny packham dress, $750 jimmy choos and that diamond bracelet, a wedding gift from prince charles. >> nice gift. way to go prince. while kate was trend setting in
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london, our lifestyle correspondent, hilaria baldwin, checking out the latest trends for us at new york fashion week. >> front row seat to fashion week, the ultimate trend report for spring. >> hey, guys, i'm backstage with rachael zoe. what can we expect today? >> inspiration from 1970 safari and i mixed romantic girly elements with it and sexy rock and roll and sequins. hair just as important as the clothes, moroccan oil's artistic director says the look should translate from run way to real life. >> low braid, brought all the hair back and crisscross t >> one word for the collection, stunning. >> what are the colors, specific trends for the spring we should be looking for? >> white is very big trend. i also feel the shades of red and pink, like kind of mixed with salmony red. >> globally inspired. >> these are the tiles from mexico. >> i see. heavy. >> all glass and crystal. >> workout. >> that much detail, the
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director of global artistry says simple on the face two different shades on the lips will make you stand out for spring. >> some women are try sthooi wear too much comer on the lips but i think you should have fun with t >> the must-have accessory, a camilla alvas bag. >> the print has always been a trend, the snake print. >> debuting today. well, what's a beauty pageant without a little controversy, right? >> this weekend's miss america has a couple to deal with, one involving our special correspondent. >> hi, "extra," i'm mallory higgin, miss america 2013, welcome to atlantic city. >> the "new york post" reported that miss america was calling mallory fat. the two have kissed and make up. >> she is far from fat. miss kansas the first contestant ever to show off her giant tattoos, you thank you is going to affect her chances of winning? >> some more traditional people,
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like me, may find it offensive. so i think it will. >> we are going to find out who
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what great first week it has been here at our new home at universal studios hollywood. >> off to a great start, so much fun. i think judge bruno tonioli is still enjoying himself. ♪ >> over here, mario! over here, mario!
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