tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC April 14, 2015 11:34pm-12:37am EDT
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musical guest imagine dragons, and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: happy anniversary! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey! [ cheers and applause ] welcome! thank you so much. welcome, everybody, to the tonight show. thank you for being here, you're at a hot show right now. [ cheers ] this is the show to be at. thank you guys so much for being here. let's get to the news, here's what people are talking about,
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it's still the rough weather we're having. the northeast is experiencing one of the worst winters in history. which means that schools have had a record number of snow days. [ cheers ] at this rate the only math kids are doing is how many glasses of wine their mom drinks before 2:00pm -- [ cheers and applause ] it's the same glass! [ laughter ] stop counting. [ laughter ] seems like everyone's been affected by the snow. in fact schools and federal offices in washington, d.c., were shut down today after the city received four inches of snow in their first major snowstorm of the season. [ laughter ] or as boston residents put it, "are you [ bleep ] kidding me?" [ laughter and applause ] [ boston accent ] four inches of snow? i left for work this morning out of a second story window. cowboy up! [ laughter ] four inches of snow. closing schools -- [ cheers and applause ] for four inches of snow.
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this, political news here guys. yesterday a federal judge suspended president obama's executive order on immigration. which means millions of undocumented people could be deported again. when asked if he's mad about being overruled, obama said, "you know i've been married for 23 years, right?" [ cheers and applause ] no -- that's what happens. [ applause ] president obama spent monday playing a round of golf in sunny california, and then flew back to washington on air force one. and 10,000 people stranded at boston logan just became republicans. [ laughter ] very -- very interesting how that happens. during a recent interview first lady michelle obama has revealed she has banned boxed macaroni and cheese from the white house. [ audience aws ] though it's been tough on biden, 'cause he couldn't make his wife any jewelry for valentine's day. [ laughter ] it's like, "give me a head's up! give me a head's up, what am i gonna do?" [ laughter and applause ] all right, turkey hand. turkey hand it is.
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here we go. [ laughter ] speaking of joe biden, i read that some democrats are debating if hillary clinton should pick joe biden to be her vice president if he decides not to run in 2016. on one hand he's an experienced politician who has spent years shaping foreign policy. on the other hand -- >> and neil smith an old butt buddy. are you here neil? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: please pick him, hillary, please -- please pick him, please. [ applause ] where's neil, the old butt buddy of mine. isn't he here? where's my old butt buddy neil? [ laughter ] hey, there you are neil. you're always behind me. >> steve: and you're kneeling. >> jimmy: neil's always behind me, yeah. [ laughter and applause ] [ rimshot ] did you guys see this, last week, president obama's outgoing senior adviser john podesta made news when he said his biggest failure from 2014 was not disclosing government ufo files. yeah.
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he said, "the truth is still out there." [ laughter ] it didn't take long for several prospective republican candidates to jump on the issue. here's what they're saying. chris christie said "it's time for obama to disclose these ufo files." rand paul said, "what is the president hiding?" [ laughter ] rick scott said, "we should probably just forget about it." [ laughter and applause ] jeb bush said, "are there aliens among us?" rick scott said, "seriously, let's just move on to something else. what's up with immigration, huh?" [ laughter ] marco rubio said, "did anyone notice rick scott is sweating green fluid?" [ laughter ] and finally illinios congressman dan lipinski said, "you idiot, they're on to us! get back to the mothership! gleep glorp -- [ laughter and applause ] this is pretty interesting. i heard that george washington may have been one of the first
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people to use medical marijuana, to alleviate the pain from his teeth, which were made of ivory, brass and gold. which also means he was the first lil' wayne. [ laughter ] both men had grills. i think you can tell washington smoked weed. i mean take a look at this famous image of george washington crossing the delaware, you know that? right? can you pull up so we can see the rest of the painting? that's a clue right there. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: white castle. >> jimmy: gotta get a suitcase full of burgers man. >> steve: really? wow! >> jimmy: according to a recent survey, the instrumental song "intro" by the xx is the most popular song to make love to. women say they like it because it's emotional. while men say they like it, because it's two minutes and eight seconds long. [ laughter and applause ] according to my calculations, it still leaves 40 seconds of cuddling. >> steve: yeah. [ laughter ]
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[ cheers ] >> jimmy: thank you, yeah. and finally, this is everywhere today, a lifelong new york islander's fan, she's fantastic, she was at the game last night, they interviewed her. she reminisced about her early days rooting for the team. look at this. >> back in 1982 my son was conceived back in that parking lot here at an islander game. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: hey! ho! >> jimmy: in fairness that is the long island version of being on kiss cam. so that's it. [ laughter and applause ] we have a great show, give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: sounds great, guys. thank you very much, you guys, it's our one year anniversary on being on at 11:30. [ cheers and applause ]
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i just want to take a minute to say thank you to all the staff and crew and everyone who worked so hard on this show, i really couldn't do it without you guys. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, thank you. can't believe it's been a year already, i'm so lucky to have this job. and thanks to everybody who watches and supports the show, hopefully we'll be doing this for a long, long time. thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ] we have a big week of shows ahead, sigourney weaver, martin short, kevin bacon will be joining us. and we have performances from ella henderson, walk the moon and nick jonas. you don't want to miss that. [ applause ] but first, we got a great show tonight, she's the biggest star in music, and one of the most fun people you'll ever meet. here to talk about her smash record, 1989 and her 2 2015 world tour, taylor swift is here! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: one of my favorites, she is the best. >> steve: a delight.
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>> jimmy: taylor and i also have something fun planned, we're going to be showing off our dancing skills. [ cheers ] stay tuned for that. plus, from hbo's "last week tonight, with john oliver" the hilarious john oliver is stopping by! [ cheers and applause ] and we have music from imagine dragons! [ cheers and applause ] love those guys. guys, it's time to take a look at the stories making headlines today, and weigh the good with the bad. it's time for pros and cons. here we go. ♪ pros and cons and pros and cons and pros ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tonight we'll be taking a look at the pros and cons of watching the academy awards. hollywood's biggest night is coming up this sunday. everyone will be tuning in to see their favorite stars. >> steve: wow! oscar party. >> jimmy: yes! [ laughter ] so let's take a look at the pros and cons of watching the academy awards. here we go. pro, it's the 87th academy awards. con, thanks to botox, it only
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looks like the 78th. [ laughter ] very interesting, it never aged. pro, the awards celebrate the most artistic and thought provoking films of the year. con, a.k.a the movies you haven't seen. [ laughter and applause ] yeah, i don't know any of those. i don't know any of those movies. >> steve: i didn't know that one came out. >> jimmy: pro, many think the oscars should go to "bird man" or "boyhood." con, kanye west thinks it should go to beyonce. [ cheers and applause ] she didn't put out a movie. she didn't put out a movie though. it's like a documentary. >> steve: she still deserves it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: are you sure? >> steve: yeah. she deserves it. >> steve: i talked to kanye, he convinced me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: can-ye? >> steve: canye east. >> jimmy: i'm talking about kanye west. >> steve: sorry. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pro, "whiplash" was nominated for best picture. con, "50 shades of grey" was nominated for best whip lash.
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[ cheers ] new category. pro, john travolta will be presenting again this year. con, in the category of best actrell, in a supporting razeem. [ laughter and applause ] that's a tight race this year. >> steve: tight race for the razeem. >> jimmy: competitive one, yeah. pro, "gone girl" is about a a psychotic woman who does insane things in the name of love. con, it's basically the bachelor the movie. [ laughter ] i'm in either way. pro, seeing bradley cooper win for his portrayal of sniper chris kyle over eddie redmayne's portrayal of astrophysicist steven hawking. con, hearing steven hawking go, "bitch, please." [ laughter ] >> steve: he's got a salty mouth. bitch please. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pro, robert duvall was nominated for his role in "the judge."
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con, judge ruth bader ginsberg was nominated for her role in "the hangover." >> steve: oy! [ laughter ] that was pretty funny, i'd go see that. >> steve: i'm there. >> jimmy: and finally, pro, "50 slades of grey" isn't eligible for any academy awards this year. con, it's an honor just to be dominated. [ laughter ] there you go, that is the pros and cons, everybody. thank you very much. [ applause ] it's one year, we've done the show for one year. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: that's great. [ cheers and applause ] seems like it was yesterday we started. thank you, higgins, i appreciate you doing the show. it's fun to do it with you, buddy. >> steve: thank you. >> jimmy: you're awesome. steve higgins, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] and thank you, roots, you know the show wouldn't be the show without you. thank you, roots. greatest, the roots. [ cheers and applause ] guys, you know, i used to have a ben & jerry's ice cream
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flavor called "late night snack." that was a big deal at one point. [ cheers ] it was great, but this isn't late night any more, this is the tonight show. this is the big leagues, we got to raise the bar! we gotta up our game! [ cheers and applause ] and that's exactly what we did. we holed up in the ben and jerry's lab -- [ laughter ] we tried thousands of ice cream flavor combinations. [ laughter ] we sampled millions of ingredients. [ laughter ] just look at this exclusive footage of me doing a taste test. [ robot voice ] >> hello, i like ice cream. ice cream is cold, is cold, is cold. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: now, we didn't stop. you're welcome. this is exclusive footage. i didn't even know the camera was rolling. [ laughter ] >> steve: you didn't know they were rolling. undercover footage. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we didn't stop until we found the perfect flavor. i'm talking about a brand new tonight show ice cream! [ cheers and applause ] and guess what, we're about to unveil it for the very first time right now. here to help me, ladies and gentlemen, give it up for ben
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and jerry! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> beautiful. >> jimmy: come on, my man. thank you, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] the guys! that's the guys right there. they do it, they do it! you guys are the coolest. [ cheers and applause ] thank you so much for coming. i appreciate you being here you guys. i know you had to travel a long way. >> we're excited to be here! >> jimmy: i know -- >> we don't show up for a lot of these late nights. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i know, yeah. but i love what you do. you make the best ice cream out there. but you also do so much for charities and you do stuff for fair trade, and our ice cream is made with all fair trade ingredients. >> yep. >> jimmy: can you explain what fair trade is? >> yeah. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: it's really cool. >> it's a program that guarantees a fair price for small farmers in developing countries for commodities like vanilla, cocoa, coffee. ben & jerry's is now 100% fair trade and 100% non-gmo.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i couldn't be more excited, everyone is going to love this new flavor. now let's show them what it is. questlove, can i get a drum roll please? [ drum roll ] [ cheers ] here we go. the tonight dough! [ cheers and applause ] this is it right there! the tonight dough, starring jimmy fallon! guys, this ice cream is the greatest, it is the best tasting ice cream i swear you will ever, ever have in your life. can you tell us what's in it, you guys? >> chocolate and caramel ice cream -- [ cheers ] cookie dough and peanut butter cookie dough -- >> jimmy: yes! [ cheers ] >> -- and a chocolate cookie swirl! >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. [ cheers and applause ] peanut butter cookie dough.
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chocolate chip cookie dough. it's basically the greatest ice cream -- thank you. [ laughter ] hey higgins. >> there it is. >> jimmy: thank you my friend. it's the greatest ice cream i've ever had. and all the proceeds go to charity. all my proceeds go to charity, correct? >> the "serious fun children's network," that has camps all over the world for kids that are seriously ill. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for doing that. it's a great ice cream, it's a a great cause. guys, go to the nearest ben & jerry's scoop shop and demand it! [ cheers and applause ] this sunday's new york times best selling ice cream list comes out, i want to be number one! [ cheers and applause ] and we're going to get it started right here, because there's tonight dough ice cream for everyone in tonight's studio audience! [ cheers and applause ] check out www.benjerry.com to see where you can find tonight dough in stores. my thanks to ben and jerry!
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thank you guys so much. >> thanks buddy. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we'll be right back with taylor swift, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ t-mobile is breaking the rules of wireless. and the samsung galaxy s6 edge is breaking the rules of design. can't get your hands on it because you're locked down by a carrier? break free t-mobile will pay every penny of your switching fees. get ahead of the curve and get your hands on the galaxy s6 edge for $0 down at t-mobile today.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody, our first guest is a a multiple grammy award winning music industry superstar, look at her on the cover of "vogue" here. oh, my goodness. [ cheers and applause ] she kicks off a new world tour on may 5th in tokyo. her latest album "1989" has already sold over 6 million copies worldwide. [ cheers and applause ] spawned multiple hit videos including a brand new one called "style." please welcome back, a good friend of the show, here's taylor swift, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hey!
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>> jimmy: taylor swift, thank you so much for coming on the show, i appreciate it, thank you. how much fun did you have the other night at "saturday night live." >> first of all, happy one year. [ cheers and applause ] and second of all, happy, you just played with paul mccartney on stage. >> jimmy: no, it was beyond that. >> that's for both of us. we both did that. >> jimmy: we both did that. i mean were you freaking out? i definitely was. >> yes. >> jimmy: i remember i was up on stage and i was there with dan aykroyd and then paul mccartney and i couldn't believe that. >> yeah, that was the starting team. >> jimmy: yeah, and i look and i just saw you out there and you were just awesomely cool and fun, and just watching me dancing and i go like, "please, do you want to come up?" and you came up, and you go, "do you have a guitar?" and i go, i love that you're going to come up and jam out on the guitar. yes, i have a guitar! and i gave you a guitar, and you're like -- [ imitates guitar ] and you're just a rock star, ready to go. i was like, how cool is taylor swift? and then, you go, "i'll do one of my songs." and paul goes, "all right, we're going to do 'i saw her standing there.'" >> it's in e. >> jimmy: "it's in e.
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we'll do it in e. here we go, one, two, three." [ imitates guitar ] and we're like not planned out, no one planned any of this. >> we didn't know what was going on. >> jimmy: and we sang "i saw her standing there." and i was screaming it. >> and we were doing the ooooh. >> jimmy: oooh, yeah , i was going for it. and then you are like, we finished that and then you go "i'll do one of my songs, you started "shake it off." and i go, "i don't know if paul mccartney knows 'shake it off.'" and there he is, he knew "shake it off." and he was like, "shake it off, shake it off. shake it off, shake it off." and then he was like, "oooh, hooo." >> and i was going because the player's gonna play. and you go, "play play play play." >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, i was looking at paul mccartney, i go this is so fun, i'm singing "shake it off" with taylor swift and paul mccartney. one of the best things that ever happened to me ever. >> this is the reason for all the guitar lessons. [ laughter ] this is the reason, this moment. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. and now you're about to go on this giant world tour. it starts may 5th in tokyo? >> yeah. >> jimmy: oh my god, how exciting. then you come to the usa on may 20th. you're going to bossier city, louisiana. meadowlands july 10th and 11th. you have haim opening? >> yeah, those are three of my
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best friends. >> jimmy: dude, i love those guys. they're really good. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, haim is going to be a a bunch of shows. >> jimmy: they've been on the show. great band, haim is fantastic. they were at the after party with me, and they were part of the reason -- they were like, "we got to go get by the stage." yeah, so that was part of the reason i had my squad there like egging me on. let's get up there. >> jimmy: you got to have your pals there. yeah, and speaking of pals, look at this pal right here. this is like your buddy now. >> yeah, that's carly. >> jimmy: yeah, so you can carly just hang out and just be very beautiful together. >> very casually on the cover of "vogue" together. >> jimmy: yeah, me and my best friend we're on the cover of "cat fancy." [ laughter ] yeah, it's kind of exciting. it's kind of exciting. but, this is exciting because it just gets so much press, all this stuff. i just had some staff -- before i forget, you're the first female artist to have four consecutive studio albums to stay at number one for six plus weeks. hasn't happened since the beatles. [ cheers and applause ] first artist, first artist ever, to sell a million copies in a week, three times. no one's ever done that ever.
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that's what you've done. [ cheers and applause ] you have a new video out now, "style." the other two have done 500 plus million on vevo? i mean they're amazing. "blank space," i mean everyone's imitating and spoofing. i was like this is brilliant. it was really good. >> thank you. >> jimmy: so well done. so "style" is another big hit for you. you have this quote that made me, i was just like, oh i wanted to write you but you refuse to give me your e-mail or number. >> that -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: which is fair, but we're friends through, you know, through our people. through the universe. >> i feel like we should be real like number exchanging friends now after the paul thing. >> jimmy: yeah, we should, yeah. >> i just don't feel like -- i feel like we went through something together. >> jimmy: yeah, we definitely, we were like kind of the 7th and 8th. we're on the list of beatles. [ laughter ] up there. i mean, we're up there. >> yeah, we need to exchange e-mails. >> jimmy: we should, yeah, okay good. >> jimmy: but you said, i remember someone was like "well is it a country album? is it country-pop? and it was like no, this is a a pop album. why would you do a pop album?
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why woudn't you do a a country-pop hybrid? "taylor, why don't you do the country song? why don't you do the hybrid song?" and you go, "if you chase two rabbits you lose both of them." >> yeah, i mean if you've ever tried chasing like actually two rabbits, you'll probably lose both of these. >> jimmy: you won't catch either one. >> you probably lose one rabbit if try chasing a rabbit at all. but the phrase that i use could offend myself. >> jimmy: yeah, if you chase two rabbits, you'll lose them both. i was like, "gosh, i love that. it's so well done." >> figuratively, that's just what i told my label. and you know, they were very kind of comfortable with what we've been doing, because things had been going well. making my last album, "red" was a sort of a hybrid between country and pop. >> jimmy: yeah, it was great. >> oh, thanks. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're good. you're really good. >> i just thought, you know, that there's no way that you can keep doing the same thing over and over again, it's going to be exciting to you or exciting for fans. like, you have to change things up, and then, you know, some people in my team were like, ya know, but this is a great album, we love it, we think these songs are incredible.
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this is the best work you've ever done. can you put three country songs on it? >> jimmy: yeah, "this is what i love and everybody loves it up in the corporate office. could we have like four more country songs? we'd just love four country songs." no, you didn't do it. i love that you didn't do it. stick to your guns. you're a smart cookie. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i do feel this bond of, and i think honestly i feel bad for you know, your pal here. >> a lot of people do. >> jimmy: just look at her, just look at her. >> look at her. >> jimmy: you feel bad for her. no, i mean, she's obviously gorgeous. but, you do this thing in there. there's like a best friend test where you guys get two blank pieces of paper and a pen, you draw each other. you have 20 seconds. you're not allowed to look down. >> yeah, we did that for vogue.com. it was like a video. >> jimmy: yeah, and i was thinking, let's test this out. test the waters. i mean, we know each other. [ cheers ] she's getting a study in right now? i have a pen. >> let's go, it's time. >> jimmy: there's a pen and paper right there. >> okay. >> jimmy: all right, so here we go. start here. we have 20 seconds on the clock.
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>> you can't look down. >> jimmy: can't look down at the thing. >> yeah, starting now. >> jimmy: starting now. go. i saw you draw a big face already. [ laughter ] i saw you, big face. [ laughter ] >> oh, god no. >> jimmy: oh, did you look down? >> no, no, no, no, no. >> jimmy: now you're looking up. >> oh god. [ buzzer ] >> jimmy: all right. let me see your drawing of me. [ audience aws ] ♪ that's really good. >> i did the hearts so that no matter how badly i did the face, it would redeem myself. >> jimmy: you don't tell me that, you keep it a secret to yourself, yeah. >> oh, okay. >> jimmy: uh, here's -- this is not bad, here's is my drawing of you. >> ooh. [ laughter ]
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>> jimmy: not bad. >> artistic. very artistic. >> jimmy: thank you, artistic. thank you very much. taylor, we like to play games with people on the show, i was wondering if you would do a a little fun game or something. let's just show off our skills when we come back. do you mind? >> sure, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: taylor swift and i are showing off some of our dance moves after the break. stick around, it's going to be good. it's going to be fun. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ fly into sears, #1 in appliances and home of kenmore, the most awarded brand in the industry. and hurry in for the lowest prices of the season event! save 50% off stainless steel kenmore wall ovens with sears card. get up to 20% off other kenmore appliances... plus, use your sears card and get an extra 15% off all appliances over $499. and free delivery on all appliances over $399. start your search at sears
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about, that i love about you, i see you on these awards shows, like the grammys stuff like that, you're always having fun. you're always having a good time. and you're always like -- sometimes it's always like you're dancing or something, here's you at the grammy's last week. ♪ >> jimmy: yeah. so that's -- that's smooth moves right there. yeah. you got the -- yeah. >> oh, yeah. this one, and then into it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: into it yeah. that was -- >> into it, yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. it's fantastic. it was a remix. and i don't want to make an issue out of it or anything, but -- i have to say, kind of a a little upset. i'm a little upset, because every time i see you dancing at events -- because for a while, that was our thing. [ laughter ] >> oh -- >> jimmy: do you remember? >> yes, i do. >> jimmy: yeah. yeah, that was a long time ago, but you know we really used to
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go -- used to go all out. >> jimmy: yeah. i'm sorry. i'm sorry, i forgot about that being just like our exclusive thing. >> jimmy: we were like jumbo -- we were famous jumbotron dancers. [ laughter ] yeah, we used to goo to the sporting events in new york and just really give it our all. >> jimmy: yeah, we would go for it, any time we showed up on the jumbotron just do it. i just we contacted a lot of the arenas around new york and we actually got some footage of just -- jumbotron footage. just random footage. >> we're in it? >> jimmy: we're actually a lot of it. [ laughter ] yeah, yeah, i gotta say -- just take a look at this. >> wow. ♪ ♪ y'all ready for this ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ where did you come from where did you go where did you come from cotton eyed joe ♪ ♪
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♪ she's a maniac maniac on the floor ♪ ♪ and she's dancing like she's never danced before ♪ ♪ she's a maniac maniac on the floor ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ and she's dancing like she's never danced before ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> nice. nice casual walk down memory lane. >> jimmy: yeah, we should -- we should do that again sometime. >> we should go back there.
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>> jimmy: my thanks to taylor swift, ladies and gentlemen. stick around, we'll be back with john oliver! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ do you regularly do you wear underwear? (laugh) yeah yes (laugh) i never wear underwear. is that too much information? yes now, do you think you can get too much information from your car? no this is an email from my car. there are 100s of diagnostics that the vehicle gathers and sends to me. does anyone want to meet the sender of this email? this is a 2015 chevy malibu. i love it. ♪
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♪ ♪ ♪ whi, i, for me,witch i personally think that all the breakfast sandwiches are the same. a dry biscuit with sausage or bacon on it. and that's it. have a nice day. but this is an a.m. crunchwrap. with my eggs, and my bacon and cheese. but what really sets it off is the fact that i have a hashbrown in here. really, who does that? i pass a mcdonald's and i pass a burger king just to get to taco bell. i'm c.j. and i'm a breakfast defector! ♪ [bong!]
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest won multiple emmy awards for his work on the "daily show with jon stewart." now he's the host of his own show called "last week tonight with john oliver," which airs sunday nights at 11:00 p.m. on hbo. ladies and gentlemen please welcome, john oliver. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hey! welcome back to the show. >> thank you. it's good to be back, happy anniversary. happy anniversary. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: a lot of anniversaries. thank you for saying that. a lot of anniversaries we just did the "snl 40th anniversary."
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>> yes you did. >> jimmy: and our show -- >> yeah, that was spectacular. >> jimmy: it ws pretty fun. >> i was -- we were also on, on sunday night and i've never had a more visceral sense of nobody listening to what i was saying. [ laughter ] is there anybody out there? is anyone watching this? i'm guessing not. >> jimmy: you give out your personal phone number, yeah. and no one -- >> i know. i couldn't believe they let all -- that's comedic royalty. and the royal family in england cannot be on a plane together. it seems risky. >> jimmy: yeah. >> because if anything had happened on sunday night, there would have been no comedy in america. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i didn't think about that. >> it would be all gone. >> jimmy: did you -- you grew up in england, right? >> i did. [ laughter ] that's a rock solid guess, jim. >> thank you, yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> that's right. that is -- >> jimmy: i did my research on -- yeah. wikipedia, yeah and they said something about that. >> that's right.
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your ears connected to your brain, they made the one connection -- i think i'll go -- i don't want combo this to much. [ laughter ] i think i can crack this case. >> jimmy: well, i wasn't sure if you were born there or just raised there. >> i was born and raised. born and raised there. >> jimmy: born and rasied. and american comedy was there at the time? >> yeah, that's all i used to listen to american standup before bed. i use to have all of richard pryor albums. i had every single album by richard pryor, and i would listen to it every night before i went to bed. to the point -- i pretty much knew every single album of his by heart. and have you not heard richard pryor's comedy, until you've heard it secondhand through the voice of a a 9-year-old white british boy. [ laughter ] that's how it's supposed to sound. >> that's really how it -- yeah. >> what you want to do is listen to a little white british boy saying, "not many black people get bitten by snakes. [ laughter ] because they be strolling to smooth in the woods. [ laughter ] they be like, snake."
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yeah, that's right. >> jimmy: that i ain't bad -- richard pryor, yeah you know that. >> that's right. it was amazing, even in england. i thought, "why do black people not get bitten by snakes?" i don't know, but i love the way he explains it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, exactly it's fantastic. i got to tell you, we know we're fans of your show, i've made appearances on your show as well. >> you have. you took a fish to the face and thank you for that. >> jimmy: thank you very much, yeah. if you get that you know what we're talking about. yeah, i did. i took a fish to the face. it's just so good, and it's just so well written. and -- the miss america thing. >> yeah. so, we looked at the miss america -- yeah miss america claims to be a great organization in general, which is arguable. but -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, no, it's true, they are. i guess. >> i wouldn't -- i'm more sure they're not. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay very good. >> but they claim to be the largest scholarship fund for women, and so we looked into that, and that turns to be -- that turns out to be a a stretching of the truth. >> jimmy: it is, really. yeah. >> it's heavily stretched. >> jimmy: you have a screen grab from -- >> well that's where this is
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from their website. as we started looking into this, this is when we thought there might be something up. [ laughter ] their website -- >> jimmy: you did not mess with this? >> no, no, this was their website. >> jimmy: okay. >> and it just says "we fun scholars." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so close. >> so close. >> jimmy: so close. >> so very close. >> jimmy: so close, almost -- >> that kind of issued a bat signal in our mind of, "oh, this looks like a [ bleep ] organization." [ laughter and applause ] if you can spell the word fund, you're probably not funding anything. >> jimmy: yeah, they left off the "d." >> they left off the "d." >> jimmy: congratulations, and i just heard the great news, just came out, breaking news, hbo picked you up for another two seasons. >> they did. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: so happy for you, man. we're going to be neighbors for a while, hopefully. >> yes. >> jimmy: hopefully. hopefully. we have jobs. >> we have jobs. we're not fired. >> jimmy: we're not fired. >> we're not fired. [ laughter ] yeah. that's the problem, i'm too british to kind of take any good news like that.
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>> jimmy: are you currently one? [ laughter ] >> still -- still -- i'm still from england, yes. >> jimmy: i have to ask because it's out there as well, "the daily show", jon stewart just announced that he's stepping down. >> i know. i know, amazing. >> jimmy: then i go, "well, i don't know, who could replace him?" do you have any -- >> well, i don't know, i owe that man everything, everything. >> jimmy: yeah. really? >> yeah, no, everything. i could fact check how much i owe him, it will be everything. [ laughter ] like most people, i would love him to carry on. >> jimmy: but he'll come up with an idea -- >> he said -- here's the thing, how about hologram jon? [ laughter ] because he said almost every word in the english language. >> jimmy: yeah. if you can put oliver reed in a a film he wasn't in, surely you can just have hologram jon like tupac hosting the show every night. [ laughter ] >> this is a great idea, comedy central, we got the answer for you right now. >> it's not that complicated, hologram jon like tupac. >> jimmy: hologram jon stewart. that's it, yeah. >> that's right. >> jimmy: jon tupac, there you go right there. >> jon tupac. jon tupac! >> jimmy: jon -- >> jon stewart from here tupac
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from there. [ laughter ] that's what i'm saying. >> jimmy: john oliver, everybody. >> that's a show. that's a show. >> jimmy: "last week tonight with john ol airs sundays at 11:00 p.m. on hbo. stick around, imagine dragons perform next. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [grunt] ♪ [engine revving] ♪ i got bit by a snake. poison? oh god, oh wow. ok, yeah. i feel that. it's definitely poison. apparently, i'm immune to venom. immune steve. immune to venom? ♪ you love our greatest, now try our latest. olive garden's irresistible duos. our most craveable classics like chicken parmigiana, paired with new tastes to explore, plus salad and breadsticks. four all new duos, starting at just $11.99.
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are full of the good stuff like golden oats, dark chocolaty chunks and salty pretzels. each for 100 feel-good calories. ♪ because you should give life all the flavor you've got. special k snacks. be flavorful. and i quit smoking with chantix. i had tried to do it in the past. i hadn't been successful. quitting smoking this time was different because i got a prescription for chantix. along with support, chantix (varenicline) is proven to help people quit smoking. the fact that it reduced the urge to smoke helped me
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sale right now for their big summer tour which begins june 3rd in portland, oregon. performing the song "shots," please welcome imagine dragons! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ i'm sorry for everything oh everything i've done ♪ ♪ ♪ am i out of touch am i out of my place ♪ ♪ when i keep saying that i'm looking for an empty space oh i'm wishing ♪ ♪ you're here but i'm wishing you're gone i can't have you and i'm only gonna ♪ ♪ do you wrong
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oh i'm going to mess this up oh this is just my luck over and over ♪ ♪ and over again i'm sorry for everything oh everything i've done from the second ♪ ♪ that i was born it seems i had a loaded gun and then i shot shot shot a hole through ♪ ♪ everything i loved oh i shot shot shot a hole through every single thing that i loved ♪ ♪ ♪ am i out of luck am i waiting to break when i keep saying that i'm looking for ♪ ♪ a way to escape oh i'm wishing i had what i'd taken for granted i can't help you and i'm ♪ ♪ only gonna do you wrong oh i'm going to mess this up
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oh this is just my luck over and over ♪ ♪ and over again i'm sorry for everything oh everything i've done from the second ♪ ♪ that i was born it seems i had a loaded gun and then i shot shot shot a hole through ♪ ♪ everything i loved oh i shot shot shot a hole through every single thing that i loved ♪ ♪ ♪ in the meantime can we let it go at the roadside that we used to know ♪ ♪ we can let this drift away oh we let this drift away at the bayside where you used to show ♪ ♪ in the moonlight we let it go we can let this drift away let this drift away ♪ ♪ there's always time to change your mind oh there's always time to change your mind ♪ ♪ oh love can you hear me oh let it drift away i'm sorry for everything oh everything i've done♪ ♪ from the second that i was born
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it seems i had a loaded gun then i shot shot shot ♪ ♪ a hole through everything i loved oh let me make it up to you let me make it up to you ♪ ♪ in the meantime can we let it go at the roadside that we used to know ♪ ♪ we can let this drift away oh we let this drift away at the bayside where you used to show ♪ ♪ in the moonlight we let it go we can let this drift away let this drift away ♪ ♪ there's always time to change your mind oh there's always time to change your mind ♪ ♪ oh love can you hear me oh let it drift away ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey!
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to taylor swift, john oliver, imagine dragons! [ cheers and applause ] ben & jerry, the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] everyone who works so hard on our show, thank you so much for a great first year. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrow bye-bye everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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