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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  November 16, 2016 11:35pm-12:39am EST

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i take it things could have gone better. ( explosion ) all the ship's systems are shutting down, captain. ( groaning ) i need to know what's going on out there. chief, get me some sensor readings. dax, take care of muniz. ( gasping ) i can't feel my legs. don't worry, they're there.
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and hook up a tricorder to the ship's sensor array. those are ultritium concussion shells they're detonating. without shields, a direct hit would destroy us. i do not believe they are trying to hit us. the targeting systems cannot be that ineffective. they're trying to rattle us. ( explosion ) we're not going to let them do that. the vorta doesn't want the ship. she wants something aboard it. any idea what? it could be anything... encoding device, guidance system... maybe she lost an earring. sisko: whatever it is it's keeping us alive. find it! chief... i need that weapon. i'll still have to charge the emitter arrays.
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you have your weapon, sir. nice work, mr. o'brien. but the bad news is... the turret is stuck. you can only fire in one direction. maybe we'll get lucky and the jem'hadar will pick that place to stand. ( explosion ) ( groaning ) ( explosion ) easy, quique. there's nothing to be afraid of. it's beautiful. precioso. ( explosion ) better than last year don't you think? los cuehetes... the fireworks of the carnival... they're terrific, aren't they? easy, quique.
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like a thousand shooting stars. ( explosion ) that was a good one, eh? yeah, that was a good one. ( footsteps approaching ) i'll say one thing for the jem'hadar. they travel light. no cargo, no storage compartments. d find these data crystals in one of the computer rooms. there may be some encoded information on them but the crystal structure has been randomized. in other words, they're blank. as far as i can tell. it would help if we knew what we were looking for. ( explosion ) but we don't. las estrellas... mira... look... que bonita.
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commander. what is it? it may have been the vorta's computer console. i found it in one of the upper compartments but the power grid is off-line in that part of the ship. so you ripped it out of the wall. very nice. so, what do we do with it now? use it for a doorstop? ( explosion ) i don't care what you do with it. worf, i was kidding. it was a good idea. we'll hook it up and see if we can get it working. ( explosion ) with us by now. i have a game i would like to play with them. if only i could leave this prison and meet them face-to-face on a field of battle. ( explosion ) right now, that doesn't sound like a bad idea. chief, could you
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that is no way for anyone to die. i told you, he is not going to die. it is only a matter of time. so we should just kill him, right? if you truly are his friend you would consider that option. it would be a more honorable death than the one he's enduring. i'm not some blood-thirsty klingon looking for an excuse to murder my friend. that's enough. no. er weak human afraid to face death. ( yells ) i said that's enough! you're starfleet officers. now, start acting like it! dax: tough guys. a little pressure and they buckle. dax, maybe you haven't noticed, but no one's laughing. now, i know it's hot. we're filthy.
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but we will never get out of this if we don't pull it together and start to act like professionals. ( shuddering groan ) chief, i want that power grid up and running. aye, sir. commander worf, see if you can get that turret to rotate. aye, sir. dax, search the ship again and again until you find what the vorta wants. yes, sir. and you mr. muniz... your orders are... to stay alive. captain's log, supplemental. the jem'hadar barrage
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main power and helm control. if we can bring the ship's engines on-line we may be able to lift off and escape from here. as soon as we finish calibrating the induction reactors we can fire up the main core. ( explosion ) good, because, unless there are any objections i'd like to get the hell off this planet. i'm for that. ready, chief. i could use a couple more hours to fine-tune the magnetic flux couplers but under the circumstances, now's as good a time as any. let's do it. sisko: everyone brace yourselves. commence launch sequence. ion thrusters fully charged. ventral impellers, one quarter. plasma compensators, on-line. thrusters to one half. chief, i'm getting a low-frequency resonance in the main reactor housing. o'brien: that's all right. keep compensating with the inertial dampers. dampers are at maximum. we need more power. ventral jets to one half.
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increase power to one half. main reactor housing, destabilizing. reactor containment field overloading. induction dampers disintegrating, captain. if we don't cut power we'll have a core breach. disengage thrusters. power down all systems. ( explosion ) how bad? main power grid is completely fused. d. we'll have to wait until the defiant gets here. she'll be able to pull us out of here with a tractor beam. which means we have 36 hours to make repairs. you all know what to do.
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( explosion ) i told muniz he was going to make it n's supposed to say. ( explosion ) i have got to get this ship back to the station, old man. five people have died on this mission. i want to be able to tell their families why.
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it can't hold its shape. it's dying. then we're in trouble. that's what the vorta has been looking for-- a founder.
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( shrieks ) ( humming ) the bombing stopped. for an assault. tell worf to man the... where are your soldiers? they're dead. they killed themselves. why? because they allowed a founder to die. you should have trusted me. how could i?! the first word out of your mouth was a lie! this isn't your first mission outside the dominion, is it? i regret saying that
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you should have told me about him. you might have killed him or made him a hostage. no. all i wanted was the ship. and i was willing to let you take it. so... this is how it ends. it's true. the jem'hadar died by their own hands. muniz... the runabout crew... your soldiers... they'd all still be alive if we had trusted each other. i have no way of stopping you from taking the ship. all i ask is that you allow me to remove
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of course. do you have any gods, captain sisko? there are things i believe in. duty? starfleet? the federation? you must be pleased with yourself. you have this ship to take back to them. i hope it was worth it.
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( sighing ) what did starfleet have to say they're pleased. that's all? just pleased? very pleased. they're giving us all medals. i'll add it to my collection. starfleet command is waiting for my official report but every time i try to get it started... i find myself staring at the casualty list
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t'lor, rooney, bertram, hoya, muniz. it may sound cruel, but we both know that ship out there was worth it. those five deaths may save 5,000 lives or maybe even five million. and if i had to make the same trade all over again, i would. but five people are dead. fine men and women who deserved a lot more than to die on some lonely planet 50,000 light-years away from home! ( slams pad ) when you were at the academy was professor somak teaching? moral and ethical issues of command. i remember her favorite speech: "always maintain emotional distance
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it's good advice. and i try to follow it but it's a lot more complicated outside of the classroom. did you know that jake and muniz have the same birthday? that i performed the ceremony at hoya's wedding? and rooney-- he could play the trumpet. i heard him at quark's once and he had the people dancing in the aisles. i remember and you know something else i remember about him? how proud he was to wear his uniform and how proud he was to serve under you. the same as hoya t'lor, bertram and muniz.
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and they died fighting for something that they believed in. that doesn't make it any easier.
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we used a phase-conjugate graviton emitter in the tractor beam. the baby came out of the rock first time. you would have loved it, quique. ( door opens ) i did not mean to interrupt. it's all right.
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i am? yes. it's an old klingon tradition. when a warrior dies in battle his comrades stay with the body to keep away predators. that allows the spirit to leave the body when it is time to make the long journey to sto'vo'kor. that's a fine tradition. what are you doing? we will both keep the predators away. i'm sure quique would like that.
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and paramount television
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( combadge signal beep )
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[captioning sponsored by paramount television
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the glacier fractures are stable. we're clear to beam inside. woman: acknowledged.
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neural gel packs frozen solid. decks nine through 14 are now deck ten. they've been compacted. looks like they hit the ice at full impulse. the e.m.h.? i'm trying to access sick bay. the relays aren't responding. i'm losing the interface. reset the power cell. ( sighs ) come on!
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chakotay to tessa. go ahead. i found her. lock on to the transporter relay and beam her to the lab. stand by. make it quick. this isn't exactly a happy reunion. i've got a lock. please state the nature of... long time no see. i go by harry now. it's a long story. where's your mobile emitter? what's happened to the ship? the crew? no time. the emitter. it's in here, but... here. slap it on and let's go. wait. i demand an explanation. i'll give you one.
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( crew cheering and applauding ) janeway: ladies and gentlemen please... may i introduce the next generation of instellar propulsion--
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rs, two months, 11 days-- that's precisely how long voyager's been in the delta quadrant and during that time we've advanced the frontiers of exploration and, more importantly, we've survived. now it's time to go home. ( cheering ) enjoy the celebration, but keep in mind we've still got a lot of work to do before tomorrow's flight. go easy on that champagne, lieutenant. quantum matrix... benamite crystals... borg technology... can you imagine what starfleet is going to say? i don't think we'll hear any complaints. the federation's first slipstream drive... they'll probably nominate us for the cochrane medal of honor. i'll start working on my acceptance speech. "i'd like to thank the borg collective..." dinner plans? date with a replicator. cancel it. that's an order. aye, captain. lieutenant? lieutenant. excuse me.
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ks. what is it? a talaxian fur fly. an old spacefaring tradition among my people. if one of these creatures stowed away on your ship it was a sign of good fortune. i had this little fellow preserved. he hung in my engine room for six years. uh, cute. mr. neelix, you are an unending source of astonishment. why, thank you, mr. vulcan. seven? my visual processors and motor cortex-- they are malfunctioning. sounds like a problem with your cortical implant. we'd better have a look. hold still. i cannot comply. you're intoxicated. impossible. your blood synthehol level is .05 percent.
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obviously, the borg can't hold their liquor. come to sick bay. i'll give you some inaprovaline to counteract the effects. i was simply trying to perfect my social skills as you instructed me to do. and you're doing a fine job. you have always been of enormous assistance to me, doctor. you... you are my mentor. yes. we are as one. we are as one! did you see that? hmm. speaking of which, when are you going to join the party? in a minute. you're running a warp core diagnostic now? harry, i think we built an edsel. a what? a lemon; a disaster waiting to happen. i ran a simulation last night and i discovered a .42 phase variance in the slipstream threshold. .42? so it'll be a bumpy ride.
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. it could overload the quantum matrix. did you tell the captain? not yet. i didn't want to spoil the festivities until i was sure. tom, if it'll make you feel better we'll go to the holodeck right now run a few more simulations. it's probably just a sensor glitch. paris: we're at full impulse. engaging slipstream drive. quantum field is stable. deflector at maximum. our, three, two... paris: power output is steady. quantum field is holding. shields down to 73 percent. looking good. keep that deflector aligned and we should be... we've got a phase variance-- point one. point two. remodulate the deflector. no effect. point four. i'm shutting down the drive.
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e. that slipstream is collapsing. inertial dampers are off-line. warning: hull breach on deck ten. we're losing structural integrity. computer, freeze program! ( sighs ) one more time. i think if we reroute emergency power to the deflector a little earlier... it won't help. computer restart simulation at time index... computer, belay that order. it's no use, harry. we can't just give up. 23 simulations, 23 catastrophes. ( sighs ) we've got to tell them. torres: that can't be right. we tested this engine molecule by molecule. i'm sorry, b'elanna. i wish to examine the results of the simulation. holodeck two-- run them for yourself. that is, if you don't mind being vaporized a few dozen times. i looked at their findings, captain. if we try to take that flight in the morning we'll be in escape pods by afternoon. it would appear we have no choice but to cancel it.
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we can try it harry's way. janeway: ensign? ( sighs ) i've got an idea. it's tricky, but i think it could work. the trouble begins about 17 seconds into the flight. the phase variance kicks in and the slipstream becomes unstable. what we need is someone in a shuttle to ride the rapids in front of voyager. torres: yes. they could map the threshold of the slipstream as it's forming and send the phase corrections back to us. now, here's the tricky part. the shuttle will only be a couple of seconds ahead of voyager. that doesn't give auto-navigation much time to compensate. tom? couple of seconds? we can do this, captain. put me on that shuttle. i'll get voyager through the slipstream. what choice do we have? take the drive off-line?
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we built a highly experimental piece of technology. there were bound to be setbacks. the benamite crystals at the heart of this engine have already started to decay. it could take years to synthesize more. i don't know about the rest of you but i didn't do all this work just to be stopped by a .42 phase variance. no offense, captain. none taken. all right, mr. kim... you've convinced me. prepare a flight plan and have it on my desk within the hour. yes, ma'am. i'll let you know what i decide. ( door beeping ) come in. commander, i hope you've got an appetite. famished, but i assumed you called me here to talk about the slipstream flight.
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vegetable biryani. sounds delicious. i didn't know you could cook. normally, i draw the line at a pot of coffee but tonight is a special occasion. oh? our last night in the delta quadrant. i'd say that's special enough. you've made your decision. we launch tomorrow at 0800. you and harry will take the delta flyer. voyager will be right behind you. the crew will be pleased. you can give them the news yourself... after dessert. what about you, chakotay? what do you think about my decision? i've analyzed harry's flight plan. the theory is sound but there are just too many variables. if something goes wrong in that slipstream...
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a to any starfleet engineer they'd think we were out of our minds. we can find another way home. we've waited this long. long enough. we've waited long enough. i know it's a risk... probably our biggest one yet... but i'm willing to take it. are you with me? always. speaking of risks... are you ready to try some home cooking?
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15 years? give or take a few weeks. where are we? in the takara sector just outside the alpha quadrant. the crew? except for us... dead. we think captain janeway tried to make an emergency landing on this planet. they were all killed on impact. you've been buried inside a glacier for the past 15 years. you two were here, on the delta flyer ahead of voyager. you made it. all the way back to earth. we got home, doc and all it took was killing everyone we cared about. harry. starfleet certainly took their time finding us. starfleet...
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we had to find you on our own. well, i don't know what to say except... thank you. i suppose i'd have stayed in that deep freeze forever. we're not here to salvage your program. we're here to prevent this disaster from ever happening. kim: you see, doc 15 years ago, i miscalculated the slipstream threshold and transmitted the wrong phase corrections to voyager. boom. they were knocked out of the slipstream and sent to an icy death. but i've had a long time to rethink my mistake and now i know how to fix it. so... we're going to send voyager a new set of phase corrections. isn't it a little late for that? we've found a way to communicate with voyager in the past just before the accident. better late than never. a message back through time? exactly.
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i don't understand. one of her cranial implants is a transceiver designed to communicate with other drones. that's right. it's called an interplexing beacon. we want you to extract the beacon and determine its translink frequency. that shouldn't be a problem. she looks reasonably well-preserved. good. that'll tell us where to send the message. now, the hard part-- we need to know when to send it. can you access seven's chronometric node and pinpoint the exact moment her cybernetic implants disengaged from her organic systems. her time of death? down to the millisecond, if possible. i'll see what i can do. i told you he'd come in handy. you said you'd found a way to communicate with seven in the past. how? behold... salvage component 36698... a borg temporal transmitter. chakotay: starfleet intelligence found it
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we stole it. ( doors opening ) trouble. long-range sensors are picking up a federation vessel. how much time do we have? i entered a low orbit and remodulated our shields but it won't be long before they find us. six hours if we're lucky. let me get this straight... you're fugitives? "galaxy's most wanted." we stole the delta flyer, too... right out of a federation shipyard. we're wanted on two counts of high treason and conspiracy to violate the temporal prime directive. wonderful. out of the icebox and into the fire. we don't have time for this. get started. aye, sir. we still have to retrieve those sensor logs. get ready. hello, doctor. do i know you? no, but i feel likewe're old fr. tessa omond. hello. it's an honor to finally meet voyager's infamous e.m.h. "infamous"?
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they've always spoken very highly of you. uh-huh... and how did you get involved with bonnie and clyde here? oh, i've had an interest in voyager for a long time. they're having sex. pardon? chakotay and tess. they're a couple; joined at the hip. i see. the truth is, doctor i didn't want chakotay or harry to have to face this alone. i thought i could help. ready? stay warm. omond: these controls are a little clumsy. i thought you said this ship was state of the art. it was at the time. i've located the sensor logs but... the computer is denying me access.
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hmm... looks like there's an active file here. ( transmission static ) janeway: ...luck run out... i'd like it known for the record that the crew... voyager... ...with distinction and valor... you okay? yes. it's just... the last time i was in this chair they were all here... alive. we're here to get them back.
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it's downloading. give it a minute. i don't supposed we have time for a tour? afraid not. besides, i left my quarters a mess. in just a few hours, if all goes as planned the past 15 years... erased. we don't have to do this. now you tell me. i'm serious. so am i, and i have no intentions of backing out. chakotay...
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i don't know what to call it. ridiculous, isn't it? after all these years, working toward this moment and when it finally comes all i can think about is losing you. your heart has always been here, on voyager. that'll never change. this is where you belong. and who knows? but if we don't...? then i'll miss you all the same. ...means all of that has changed. you owe me one. doctor: mr. kim, your assistance, please. got to go. what was that all about?
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a friend. how does it look? no damage to the infrastructure but i'll need an isoprobe. way ahead of you, doc. so, what was it like your homecoming? antimatter fireworks, longwinded dignitaries a vulcan children's choir. oh, we got medals pinned to our tunics. chakotay gave a speech commemorating the voyager crew. brought a tear to everyone's eye. admiral macintyre even wanted me to marry his daughter. at least you weren't buried under 20 meters of ice. you don't know how many times i wished i was. i suppose it must have been difficult with all your friends and colleagues left behind.
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from the counselors back at headquarters. "you must learn to accept the fact that you lived. "embrace life. move forward." i signed on to the first deep space vessel i could find. we tried to calculate where voyager might have fallen out of the slipstream. four years of searching. we were close. i could feel it. then, starfleet command said it was time to end the search. all those admirals who shook my hand at the homecoming-- i went to see every last one of them... begged them to keep the search alive. pretty soon even admiral macintyre stopped returning my calls. so i resigned from starfleet.
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could be our lucky number. i'm encoding it now. when did you embark on your life of crime? the second i heard about this little gem. mr. kim, did you ever stop to think about what you're trying to do here? altering the timeline may make things worse. at least you and chakotay survived. why tempt fate? this "timeline" only exists made a mistake 15 years ago. the crew trusted in me and i let them down. computer: tactical alert. vessel approaching, bearing 1-8-4 mark 7. they've found us. chakotay. go ahead. starfleet's on an intercept course. it's now or never.
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if you're having doubts, let me know. i'll take your program off-line. but if you're with us we tempt fate together. to aid an honorable thief or to spend eternity in cybernetic oblivion?
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