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tv   Late Night With Jimmy Fallon  NBC  August 15, 2012 12:35am-1:35am EDT

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♪ these days are wild baby won't you stay awhile ♪ ♪ eh oh oh stay awhile ♪ ♪ oh you got to stay awhile oh lord these days are wild ♪ ♪ baby won't you stay awhile stay awhile ♪ ♪ these days are wild oh you got to stay awhile woo oh lord eh ♪ ♪ these days are wild baby won't you stay awhile eh oh oh ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: ryan star! nice job, ryan.
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>> thank you so much, jay. >> jay: that was great, man. great, man. really nice job. i want to thank my guests -- kelsey grammer, "the boss" himself, jordan burroughs, our olympic athlete, and, of course, ryan star. tomorrow night, sylvester stallone and swimmer missy franklin. jimmy fallon's happening right now. jimmy, take it! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] jimmy: oh, wow! that's the energy i love. i feel the love. thank you. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. thank you for being here tonight. we're going to have a fun show. [ cheers and applause ] i just heard. you guys, here is some campaign news. yesterday, mitt romney's vice presidential pick, paul ryan, criticized president obama for not doing enough to create jobs. yeah. [ audience boos ] in response, obama was like, "didn't you just get a new job?" [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] thank me later, buddy. what's your problem? speaking of paul ryan, a new poll actually found that 42% of americans do not approve of mitt romney's running mate. which isn't too bad considering most americans don't approve of paul ryan's running mate. [ laughter and applause ]
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did you see this story? yesterday, mitt romney attended an event hosted by a man who was convicted of smuggling cocaine. [ laughter ] which explains romney's new campaign slogan, "mitt romney -- fighting for a better tomorrow but also a better today because that's important, too. and speaking of important, do you guys like music? [ laughter ] music is important. want to come to my house? i'll go to your house. do you have a place? romney-ryan 2012." [ applause ] >> steve: and i approve this message. >> jimmy: what is that? >> steve: i approve this message. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, i snorted this message. listen to this, the pentagon is now warning staff not to watch porn on their government computer. [ audience oohs ] in even bigger news, the pentagon is just now warning staff not to watch porn on their government computer. [ laughter ] the internet just got invented yesterday. >> steve: dude! >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] this isn't good, you guys. new reports say that north korea could test a nuclear missile within two weeks.
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north korea says this launch will go much better than the last one because they got, like, twice as much diet coke and mentos. [ laughter and applause ] hey, this is interesting. new research found that 25% of americans don't know their own cell phone number. [ laughter ] while the rest thought of a different excuse to get out of dating that researcher. [ laughter ] >> steve: do you know your cell phone number? >> jimmy: i read about a new security camera that can recognize people from their facebook photos. it could be a huge problem the next time someone commits a robbery while making a duck face. [ laughter and applause ] and finally, last week, a man in oregon walked away with minor injuries after he fell asleep in a dumpster and ended up in a trash compacter.
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[ laughter ] it raises a lot of questions, and the answer to all of them is tequila. we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots! ♪ ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right! that is guns n' roses guitarist dj ashba sitting in with the roots tonight. [ cheers and applause ] dj rocking it out tonight. he's awesome.
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dj is hosting an event on september 1st at the hard rock cafe. this is a very cool thing. in las vegas, at the hard rock café, in tandem with the anti-bullying website bullyville.com. yeah, that's very cool, buddy. >> thank you. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: and also, is this true? i just heard that guns n' roses is going to do a residency in vegas? >> yeah, we are. starting on halloween. >> jimmy: oh, my god. >> so october 31st through november 24th. >> jimmy: now, you realize the band has to show up for these gigs. [ laughter ] that's what a residency is. >> well, we'll live there. we don't have to leave. >> jimmy: oh, my god. that's going to be a nightmare. oh, my god, yeah. [ laughter ] i can't wait to see you guys out there. that is going to be fantastic. >> thank you. thank you. >> jimmy: thanks for coming by, dj. [ cheers and applause ] dj ashba. we have a great show tonight. we love it when she stops by. from "knocked up" and her new movie "paranorman," the gorgeous, the hilarious leslie mann is here. [ cheers and applause ] it's going to be a big movie. plus, he stars in one of the biggest action movies of the
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summer, "the expendables 2." dolph lundgren is stopping by tonight. [ cheers and applause ] he's a big dude. and we have some great music from grimes, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] sounds great. hey, guys, it's time to take a look at the stories making headlines today and weigh the good with the bad. it's time for pros and cons. here we go. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ pros and cons and pros and cons and pros ♪ >> jimmy: tonight, we will be taking a look at the pros and cons of "shark week." [ laughter ] [ cheers ] yeah. it's happening right now on the discovery channel. we're big fans. i love sharks. i love the way they look. i love they swim. i love the way they love. [ laughter ] so let's take a look at the pros and cons of "shark week." here we go. pro -- it's a fascinating look at the lives of man-eating predators.
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con -- so is "keeping up with the kardashians." [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: they're both fun shows. >> jimmy: both entertaining shows. >> steve: both good shows. >> jimmy: pro -- 2012 is the year of the great white. con -- that's the new romney-ryan campaign slogan. [ laughter and applause ] it's really interesting. >> steve: it's topical. >> jimmy: interesting choice. pro -- you are more likely to be killed by a falling coconut than by a shark. con -- unless you're in the ocean, then you're more likely to be killed by a shark. [ laughter and applause ] you don't have to worry about those coconuts swimming in the ocean. >> steve: but if you escape and you go to the island, then you get hit by the coconut. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. well, that's why i'm saying like "shark week," they always put all those different facts and figures and stuff like that on the screen. >> steve: i think more people are killed by deer than sharks. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: anyway, back to the comedy show. [ laughter ] pro -- impressing your friends with your knowledge of how to survive a shark attack.
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con -- you're screaming at the top of your lungs when a piece of seaweed grazes your foot. [ laughter and applause ] just punch him! punch him in the nose! punch him in the nose! dude, you got to hit him straight on! oh, seaweed. sorry. pro -- the sharks are the most terrifying creatures in the water. con -- besides women's synchronized swimmers. [ laughter ] ahh! ahh! [ applause ] it's those nose plugs. they're very pretty. >> steve: they're very pretty. >> jimmy: but that nose plug thing. >> steve: it makes them look like snakes. >> jimmy: oh, goodness. pro -- despite being in its 25th year, "shark week" programming still remains fresh and relevant. con -- as evidenced by tonight's new show, "kristen stewart and robert pattinson: what went wrong? we ask the sharks." and finally, pro -- seeing sharks up close is enough to impress anyone. con -- well, almost anyone. there she is.
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[ laughter ] ah, i love it. that's the pros and cons. we'll be right back with "wheel of carpet samples!" what! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ crowley: i'm dennis crowley, and i'm one of the co-founders of foursquare. foursquare makes apps for mobile phones that let you connect with your friends to help make the real world easier to use. my smartphone is the one thing that i never leave my house without, and it's the one thing that if i do forget, i go back to pick it up. it would be impossible to do the things that we're doing with foursquare if it wasn't for all the technology you find in a smartphone. blue shirt: when the technology's right, anything can happen. vo: get a free samsung galaxy nexus 4g lte on verizon. only at best buy. are you a fan of demoisier? [ thinking ] demois-a-who? okay, you know you're smart. you just ordered a premium roast coffee and a savory sausage mcmuffin for only a dollar each off mcdonald's dollar menu at breakfast, so... he has a certain... je ne sais quoi.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: welcome back to our show, everybody. thank you so much for watching. hey, everyone, i am so excited. coming up is my favorite game. this game is amazing. if you like carpets -- [ laughter ] and you like samples, you're going to love this. it's a game we call "wheel of carpet samples." here we go. ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: let's give it up for tonight's lucky contestants. come on over here, you guys. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] from our studio audience, welcome to "wheel of carpet samples," the only game to be adapted from a medieval torture device. how are you guys feeling tonight? >> good. great. >> jimmy: fantastic. >> i'm excited. i'm ready. stretch. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: in case you don't know the rules, here is a quick refresher. on this wheel we have a dozen carpet samples, only the best varieties, of course. we have midnight embrace. autumn hummus. bulky vulture. ticklish yak. and as always we have tonight's mystery sample. ♪ higgins, can you tell us what tonight's mystery sample is? >> steve: tonight's mystery sample is beige. [ laughter and applause ]
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>> jimmy: hey there, what is your name and where are you from? >> i'm marie, and i'm from michigan. >> jimmy: hey, welcome. [ cheers and applause ] a lot of people from michigan. all right, audience, are you ready? help me out. let's spin that wheel of carpet samples. [ cheers ] go for it. yeah. give it a good spin. there we go. don't get too close, you might get rug burn. yeah. here we go. where it ends, no one knows. it's a big mystery. we're getting close. oh, i just saw a jolly llama. no. midnight embrace! ♪ [ applause ] midnight embrace, that means your score is 383. ♪ uh-oh, you know what that sound means. your score is both a palindrome and a prime number. [ thunder ] and you know that sound means. it's time for the lightning round. [ roar ] and you know what that sound means. let's put 30 seconds on the clock. [ slide whistle ]
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and you know what that sound means. it's time to change the clock into a picture of a ham. [ giggle ] and you know what that sound means. it's time to do the ham dance. ♪ [ boing ] you know what that sound means? it's the end of round one, which means it's time for a carpet sample fun fact. >> carpet sample fun fact. president chester a. arthur's middle name was allen. >> jimmy: thank you for playing. [ laughter ] how are you doing, buddy? >> doing well. >> jimmy: nice to see you, pal. >> good to see you too. >> jimmy: what is your name, and where are you from? >> david sigel from long island. >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. there you go. representing long island. david sigel, she has got 383 points, which is the most you can possibly get. think you can top it? >> i'm going to beat her. >> jimmy: let's do it. all right. what sample do you have your eye on? >> i'm looking for cheeky zebra. >> jimmy: now, where -- oh, yeah, cheeky zebra. that's a full on sigel specialty. >> it is the sigel specialty. >> jimmy: all right. best of luck. let's spin that wheel of carpet samples. go for it buddy.
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[ cheers ] get that. come on, hopefully you get that cheeky zebra, my man. >> i got it. >> jimmy: yeah. looks like you got enough carpet in yourself. >> hey, whoa! leno's denim! you got it. ♪ this is a tricky one to get, man. this is fantastic. leno's denim is fantastic. looks like your score is 794. [ bike horn ] oh, you know what that sound means. [ light laughter ] it's time for the carpet sample joke of the day. >> carpet sample joke of the day. >> jimmy: you ready? >> i am. >> jimmy: why didn't the melon and the honeydew run off and get married? because they cant-aloupe. [ light laughter ] >> oh, my goodness. that's hilarious. wait, hello? look, didn't i tell you not to call me at work? look man, look, i'm -- >> jimmy: hey. thank you for playing. >> my pleasure. >> jimmy: please step to the end of the line. come on over here, buddy. how are you doing? >> good, nice to meet you. >> jimmy: nice to meet you, pleasure. what's your name, and where are you from? >> daniel from mineola, long island. >> jimmy: hey, very --
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[ slide whistle ] [ spring ] hey oh. you know what that sound means. it's time for a brief music video entitled "poking of potato chip, crushing of potato chip." ♪ poking a potato chip crushing a potato chip ♪ >> jimmy: okay, contestant number three -- [ scattered applause ] it is time to spin that wheel of carpet samples. go for it, buddy. you know which you got to get. you know which one you want. coming around, a lot of empty spaces there. no, you didn't get the mystery sample. kinky salmon! ♪ [ applause ] kinky salmon. which means it's time for a brief behind the scenes look at the making of the "poking a potato chip, crushing a potato chip music video." ♪
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>> all right, go ahead and poke the potato chip. okay, now, crush the potato chip. nailed it. ♪ kiss me, kiss me yeah kiss me, kiss me kiss me ♪ >> jimmy: very interesting. [ scattered applause ] now, this is one of the closest matches in a long and storied history of "wheel of carpet samples." higgins, who is tonight's winner? >> steve: how do you remove urine from a table cloth? sorry, contestant number two. ♪ [ cheers ] contestant number two. good job, buddy. what did he win? >> steve: well, jimmy, he won a carpet sample. this sample is 14 inches long, five inches wide, and it is a carpet sample. jimmy. >> jimmy: wow. congratulations. guys, unfortunately, you lost, so you will not be going home with any carpet sample tonight. you are two losers. [ laughter ] and nobody goes home on "wheel of carpet samples" without -- empty handed here.
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higgins, tell them about tonight's consolation prize. >> steve: tonight's consolation prize is a $300 gift certificate to the apple store. this $300 gift certificate is valued at $300 and can be exchanged for $300 worth of merchandise at any apple store. jimmy. >> jimmy: higgins, you can use this gift certificate at any apple store, and it's worth $300. >> steve: sorry losers. >> jimmy: so sorry, so sorry. yeah. but you're the big winner tonight. you got leno's denim, you got the carpet sample that's not even really carpet. yeah. >> i'm happy with it. >> jimmy: oh, that's the attitude we like. you can have a gift certificate as well. there you go my man. ♪ congratulations. all right, you guys, we'll see you all next time on "wheel of carpet samples." we'll be right back with leslie mann! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our first guest this evening has starred in so many great movies, from "the 40-year-old virgin" to "knocked up" to the animated hit, "rio." starting this friday, she's staring in another animated movie called "paranorman." please welcome back to the show, one of our favorites, here's leslie mann. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: leslie mann. leslie, you look gorgeous. thank you for coming back to our show. >> thank you for having me. >> i appreciate it. i know this summer you vacationed in rome. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and i did, too. i vacationed in rome. i went with my wife and i had the greatest -- >> did you have fun? >> jimmy: i loved it. i had the best time. did you have fun? >> it was -- it was -- it's a beautiful -- it's beautiful. >> jimmy: whoa, whoa, whoa.
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whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. >> no, no, no. i had -- we brought our kids, and -- >> jimmy: wait, i've got to say -- also, you're married judd apatow. >> oh, yeah. i'm married -- yeah. >> jimmy: judd apatow is a very funny -- >> yes. >> jimmy: -- gentleman. [ applause ] you think thate would have a great time to matter where you go. but of course something bad happened, or something. >> well, we brought our kids who -- maude who is 14 and iris who is 9. >> jimmy: they're very cute. they're fun. >> they're really cute. they're not fun. >> jimmy: whoa, come on. >> they are not fun. they were awful. they fought. they hate each other. and they fought the entire time, and they ruined it for us. they hate museums. they hate, like, doing anything that we want to do, and we just fought the whole time. >> jimmy: they didn't like the vatican or anything? >> they hate the vatican. >> jimmy: sistine chapel, yeah? they're just no. >> none of it. just like, pouted -- >> jimmy: why are we looking at paintings? yeah. >> -- the whole time, miserable. >> jimmy: i have a great photo of you guys pretending to have fun at the coliseum. this is pretty awesome. >> we were there for five minutes. >> jimmy: they you go. >> they let us stay five -- judd is like holding her down. >> jimmy: yeah.
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[ laughter ] he's holding her down so she doesn't go crazy. i love it. that's a decent picture right there. >> and our friend, friend outside there. >> jimmy: who is that person there? >> i'm not sure who that is. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you were photo bombed? >> we got photo bombed. >> jimmy: i like her look, man. that's a crazy look. she's going for it. i think she's doing like "lavern and shirley" off broadway or something. i don't know. [ laughter ] you also found out something else while you were in italy. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and this is something that is pretty embarrassing? >> yeah. oh, right. >> jimmy: yeah. >> my -- well, we spent a lot of time, you know, just in small spaces together, and judd is -- he does this thing where he has like holes in his underwear. like he farts holes in his underwear. >> jimmy: hey, wait, wait. whoa, whoa, whoa. now, what are you talking about? what rae you talking about? >> he does. >> jimmy: what are you talking about? >> he has -- and i know it's not like -- like, you know, like -- >> jimmy: leslie, what are you -- >> like a stressed pair. you know, like -- [ laughter ] you know, if you have a pair of underwear and the fabric moves together a lot it can, like,
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rip. but, it's only -- >> jimmy: stressed pair? >> but it's only in the -- right in the bottom part -- >> jimmy: i can't -- [ laughter ] i can't believe i'm going to show a photo of this. [ laughter ] i'm so -- honestly, we're going to have to bleep this out. >> okay, but this is -- [ laughter ] [ rim shot ] >> jimmy: it can't be real. >> okay, the hole starts here. >> jimmy: that's not just a little hole. he's wearing -- >> and then, it ended -- >> he's wearing lady gaga underpants. this is what he's doing. >> wait, what happens is my kids see it and they go and rip it off of them so that he will stop wearing them. >> jimmy: oh, i see. >> because he'll keep wearing them even though they -- >> jimmy: he's been attacked by the children. >> yeah, and they get all lose at the bottom. >> jimmy: this is ridiculous. i mean, this is -- >> like, the elastic stuff -- >> jimmy: is this a different pair? what is this one? that looks like a different pair. [ laughter ] how many pairs does he have? he's posing for that one. i can tell. >> but, these are what he brings on vacation with us. >> jimmy: oh, this is -- >> like, those are his good ones. >> jimmy: oh, my. that's his good ones for the
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trip to italy. we have to talk about "paranorman" because it's going to be neat. i want to talk about that. >> yes. >> jimmy: it's beautiful. it's a cool animated movie. but, before that, also you have the sequel to "knocked up." >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: "this is 40." >> "this is 40." >> jimmy: it's coming out in december? >> yes, uh-huh. >> jimmy: you and paul rudd -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: -- and we're talking backstage. you said a lot of the stories that paul rudd's character does is actually from your husband's life. >> right. >> jimmy: and your life. >> yeah, and if you see the trailer, which is out right now, there's -- paul is on his ipad on the toilet in one of the scenes, which judd does. >> jimmy: he does do that? >> he does. >> jimmy: he's on his ipad, like playing angry birds? >> i'm not -- no, no, no. he's not playing -- well, he will lie and say he's not doing this, but he's tweeting. so if anyone follows him, that's where he is sending his tweets from. i know. [ laughter ] but he'll lie, and he'll spend, like, 20 minutes in the bathroom, several times a day. and after like 15 minutes i knock on the door and i'm like, "what are you doing?" and he's like, "i'm going to the bathroom," and he gets really
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mad. and then, i can see, because i follow him on twitter, that he is tweeting. i'm getting a live feed. >> jimmy: you busted him. >> i busted him. and he figured out that's how i knew he was tweeting. so he went on my phone when i wasn't looking, and he unfollowed himself on my phone. and i'm like, oh god, you know he really -- i told him to stop tweeting. i thought, oh, that's so sweet he, you know, listened to me and he stopped tweeting and spending so much time on the toilet. and then, my daughter, maude, was like, "you're so stupid." he unfollowed himself. you know, like he went on my phone and unfollowed himself. >> jimmy: it's pretty genius. i've got to applaud him on that. it's pretty genius. ♪ [ applause ] so that is called, "this is 40," that movie. but now i want to talk about, "paranorman." now this is a children's animation? >> they say it -- yeah, it's a kid's movie but i love it. >> jimmy: it's from the same makers as "coraline." >> "coraline." uh-huh.
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>> jimmy: which was nominated for an academy award. >> yeah, it's awesome. >> jimmy: it's fun, right? >> it's really good. >> jimmy: what is it about? >> it's about this little boy, norman, who can talk to dead people. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and it's kind of like a little bit of an anti-bullying story in there, message. and it's just, you know, a lot of the animated movies are kind of -- i see a lot of them -- are, you know, they're fine. but, this one is like blows your mind. it's great. it's really good. >> jimmy: it's stop motion -- >> stop motion 3-d. >> jimmy: that's a new technology? well, it's the "coraline" one. >> it's the "coraline," yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: i want to show everyone a clip from "paranorman." you know, sometimes people say things that seem mean, but they do it because they're afraid. >> he's my dad. he shouldn't be afraid of me. >> he's not afraid of you. he's afraid for you.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i think that's cute. i want to see it. "paranorman." >> yeah. >> jimmy: hey, we always like to play games on our show, and since that is animation, would you like to do a little animating with me? >> i'd love to. >> jimmy: all right, leslie mann and i are playing pictionary after the break, you guys. stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ why should golfers take 5-hour energy? playing golf all day can make you tired. i've been taking the product for about a year. and, after taking 5-hour energy, i feel more energized. i have more energy. you know, i'm not tired anymore after taking it. i was skeptical but i decided one day i'd try it. 5-hour energy works fast. i have the energy to get through a meeting, to get through a workout. it keeps me alert for a long period of time, and keeps me going. on or off the course, play with energy, 5-hour energy.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: we are back with leslie mann. her big, new animated movie "paranorman" is in theater everywhere this friday. leslie and i are about to play a round of pictionary with two members of our studio audience. hey, guys, what are your names, and where are you from? >> melissa and i'm from wisconsin. >> jimmy: hey, welcome. ♪ you'll be my teammate. and what is your name, and where are you from? >> my name is colby. i'm from orange county, california. >> jimmy: very good. ♪ interesting you think, with the name colby, you'd be from wisconsin. [ light laughter ] cheese reference, you guys. hey, we're playing pictionary, and here is how it works. we pick a clue, announce if it's an action, object, person or phrase and start drawing. 30 seconds on the clock per turn. leslie and i will each go once, sketching to our teammates. with one point for a correct guess.
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then we'll have a showdown. as our third and final round, our partners will be drawing the same clue at the same time. whoever wins that wins the whole shebang. ready? >> yeah. >> ready. >> jimmy: leslie, you go first. we'll go sit over here. colby, you can sit over there. turned down the cheese joke, man. [ light laughter ] >> so, go ahead -- is this the -- okay, ready? >> jimmy: oh, yeah, you can ask the audience for help. >> seven! >> seven? [ shouting ] >> jimmy: there's only two people suggesting numbers. >> what, oh, no. >> jimmy: yay. >> oh, no. >> yes! >> jimmy: you can say, is it an object, person, phrase -- you can say what it is. >> okay. and you can look at that? >> jimmy: yeah, i'm not guessing. >> that's so hard. can i write words? no? >> jimmy: oh, my god. of course, not. in pictionary, thank you. nice try. >> oh, no, that's a really hard one. >> jimmy: come on, you can do this. >> really?
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>> jimmy: i don't know. not at all. >> jimmy: all right, ready? 30 seconds, go. >> okay, okay. >> face. smile. mohawk. >> jimmy: it's a person. it's a person. [ laughter ] tommy lee. eyebrows. oh, it's a person. mr. miyagi. [ laughter ] chief daniel -- i don't know. >> this is really bad. >> jimmy: what? he's not a fish. i mean, he's a -- >> no, indian. [ buzzer ] [ sad tuba ] >> that was really hard. >> jimmy: that's donald trump. >> oh. >> he's saying, "you're fired." >> jimmy: oh, my god. whoo, boy, okay. please sit down. >> those are hairs. >> jimmy: nice try. >> that's bad. >> jimmy: all right, ready? nice try. here. you ready? >> absolutely. >> jimmy: seven. seven. [ shouting ] [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay, i know i should
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have -- yeah. all right. this is an object. >> object. good luck. >> jimmy: ready? >> yep. it's going to be a t-shirt or some sort of clothing. gloves. inner tube. floaty. floating device. belt. hula hoop. it's something -- she's hula hooping with a duck or -- big crayon. big, big sign, crayon. flag. parade -- [ laughter ] the belly is talking. my belly. [ buzzer ] [ sad tuba ] >> jimmy: my belly's talking? [ laughter ] that's not an object at all. it's a fanny pack! >> oh. [ laughter ] [ laughter and applause ]
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>> i'm sorry to disappoint you. >> jimmy: good try. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you did good, melissa. you did good, melissa. now, it's up to melissa and colby. you guys got to go up, and this is the show down right here. whoever gets this -- and we will guess it. >> we will. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i'm confident. >> jimmy: i threw the marker. sorry. >> thank you. >> all right, all right, all right. >> jimmy: anger management. >> colby, what are you thinking? we could do middle or do you want the side? [ shouting ] >> jimmy: all right, here we go. >> okay. >> wait. i have a really nice -- okay. >> i'm going to pull a jimmy. it's an object. >> jimmy: okay, it's an object. >> okay. >> jimmy: go. did he just make fun of me? what did he just do? [ laughter ] >> a glove. >> jimmy: okie dokie. oh, it's a baseball. it's a yo-yo. it's a baseball glove. it's a mitt. catchers mitt. it's a boxing glove.
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it's an oven mitt. >> an oven mitt. >> jimmy: a turkey. it's a turkey. children drawing a turkey. it's a dog house. that is an igloo. that is a -- that is a -- a yurk. what is it? five. five. one, two -- >> both: finger nails! >> jimmy: thumbnail! >> wait. >> jimmy: thumbnail, thumbnail. thumbnail photo. >> fingernail. >> jimmy: fingernail. nail polish. >> oh! [ buzzer ] [ sad tuba ] >> finger print. >> what? you guys, you -- >> jimmy: all right, here we go. we're both so bad at this. now, we got to go again. >> okay. >> jimmy: now, it's just leslie and i. so sorry about that. don't get mad at me. [ laughter ] [ shouting ] here we go, you guys. leslie and i are going to have a showdown rematch. here we go. >> come on, jimmy. >> let's do this. >> jimmy: oh, man. >> oh, right. we both do the thing. [ laughter ] okay. >> jimmy: okie doke. >> okay, ready?
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>> jimmy: it's an object. >> object, okay. >> jimmy: ready? >> wait, wait, wait, wait. okay. >> jimmy: go. >> can't see. >> jimmy: sorry. [ laughter ] >> shovel. pail or shovel, pail. cat. >> shell fish. >> a cat. meow. >> road kill. road kill. >> turd. cat litter. cat box. >> jimmy: yes! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm so happy that you won. we won the prize! >> jimmy: it doesn't matter. it doesn't matter. so fun, you guys. our thanks to the great leslie mann. go see her new movie, "paranorman," starting this friday. dolph lundgren joins us after the break. stick around you guys. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ siri, what's my day look like? [siri] another busy day today.
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are you serious? [siri] yes i'm not allowed to be frivolous. ah ok, move my 4 o'clock today to tomorrow. change my 11am to 2. [siri] ok marty, i scheduled it for today. is that rick? where's rick? [siri] here's rick. oh, no that's not rick. now, how's the traffic headed downtown? [siri] here's the traffic. ah, it's terrible, terrible! driver, driver! cut across, cut across, we'll never make it downtown this way. i like you siri, you're going places. [siri] i'll try to remember that. are you a fan of demoisier? [ thinking ] demois-a-who? okay, you know you're smart. you just ordered a premium roast coffee and a savory sausage mcmuffin for only a dollar each off mcdonald's dollar menu at breakfast, so... he has a certain... je ne sais quoi. the tension between them reached a breaking point, literally. so they divided the production between two separate factories. each factory took a vastly different approach. left twix flowed caramel on cookie, while right twix cascaded caramel on cookie.
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left twix bathed in chocolate, while right twix cloaked in chocolate. both bars as different as the vastly distinct men who invented them. to this day, sharing nothing but a wrapper and an ill-designed driveway. try both and pick a side. [ female announcer ] women are strong. not strong with an asterisk. not strong "but." strong. period. degree created an antiperspirant that's just as strong. degree clinical protection. up to three times the strength of a basic antiperspirant. nothing is more effective. because strong women sweat. degree clinical protection. unapologetically strong. [ music playing ] [ music playing ] so what i'm saying is, people like options.
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when you take geico, you can call them anytime you feel like saving money. it don't matter, day or night. use your computer, your smartphone, your tablet, whatever. the point is, you have options. oh, how convenient. hey. crab cakes, what are you looking at? geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our next guest is one of the biggest and baddest action stars of all time. his new movie, "the expendables 2" opens in theaters on friday. please welcome dolph lundgren. ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: you are a very big man. >> thank you. >> jimmy: a big tough man. standing next to me that was just like, "wow." yeah. do people just make you say "i must break you" to them all the time? >> i must break you. >> jimmy: thank you! ahh! that's what i like. [ cheers and applause ] >> i got that out of the way. >> jimmy: just get that right out of the way. brother, thank you for coming. i know "expendables 2," this is going to be giant. look at the cast in this thing. >> right. >> jimmy: oh, my god. it's every action hero in the world. stallone, schwarzenegger, you, jean-claude van damme, chuck norris, bruce willis, jet li, randy couture. >> randy couture, yeah. terry crews, yeah. >> jimmy: it's unbelievable right there. now, this character -- your character in this is a -- he's actually a chemical engineer? >> well, yeah, that's kind of the back story. but he's also a killer. >> jimmy: he's also a killer.
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that was you in real life. not a killer, but you were a chemical engineer. >> yes, yeah. >> jimmy: really? and how did that get you into acting? >> that's what my dad said, yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, he made you major in that, yeah. but, i mean, how do you break in? you came to new york, right? >> well, what happened, i met this girl, grace jones, a singer. >> jimmy: sure. >> and her life was a little different than mine. and she kind of dragged me into the, you know, show business. and i met andy warhol, a bunch of people like that. >> jimmy: did you really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: how was that? was that like a -- like, at the factory? did you go there? >> actually, i saw him at a club where he just came up to me and said, "hi, what are you famous for?" and i'm like, "nothing." [ laughter ] and he goes, "i'll put you in my magazine." and he did, and -- you know. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: so you hung out a little bit with andy warhol, i guess. >> yeah, cool guy, yeah. >> jimmy: and then, you got "rocky 4" from that? >> "rocky 14," wasn't it? >> jimmy: no. >> "rocky 4." [ laughter ] yeah. no, actually i had to audition
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for it for a long time. >> jimmy: i have a picture of you there. >> and i was a little too tall. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're a little too tall. that's the perfect -- the perfect guy to play. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i mean, gosh, you were amazing. and then, you've got a busy year coming up because, not only do you have this movie, but you have this new tv show, which i love the idea of. it's on the reelzchannel? >> reelz, reelzchannel, yeah. >> jimmy: reelz, and it's where you have people, just normal humans, doing -- >> like you and me. >> jimmy: yeah, doing famous stunts -- like, doing stuntman stunts from famous movies, like, the "indiana jones" ball, falling out of the plane in "air force one." and like doing these crazy stunts with professional -- i guess, stunt people. do people almost die on the show? >> well, i hope they don't die, but you know. >> jimmy: but, i mean, you come close. >> it's going to be exciting. we're not jumping on these rubber balls like some of these other shows where it's like falling in the water. none of that. >> jimmy: no, there are explosions and stuff. >> yeah, explosions and motorcycles. real stunts. >> jimmy: and people can go on facebook and choose what stunt they want to see. what famous action stunt they want to see done. >> exactly, yeah.
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>> jimmy: and you'll spend all the money and do it with just a normal human being. >> you know everything. you sell it better than me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm so excited about this because i love reality shows. what is it called? >> "race to the scene." >> jimmy: "race to the scene." i will check that out. >> "race to the scene." yeah, check it out. >> jimmy: but, let's get back to "the expendables 2." this is just nuts. what is happening with the crew this time? >> well, let's see. [ as schwarzenegger ] now, we have this guy here who comes back, you know? [ as schwarzenegger ] >> jimmy: yah, that's right. [ laughter ] it's not every day you hear dolph lundgren do an arnold schwarzenegger impersonation. [ laughter ] >> and then, we have this other guy here, dolph. check out his knife. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you could do the whole show as a one man show. >> i know. i might get a raise. >> jimmy: that is genius. but, basically, what happens is what? there's like, plutonium or something? >> yeah, van damme's the villain. and we get together. we do this mission in the beginning. and then, one of us doesn't come back, and we have to take revenge. we have to find van damme and -- >> jimmy: there we go. you guys, "expendables 2" is out this friday. let's take a look at a clip.
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>> this is lost in space. got a pen? >> hey, you got anything that doesn't have skulls on it? >> as a matter of fact, i don't. believe it or not, before gunner became chemically imbalanced, he went to m.i.t. he had a masters degree in chemical engineering. >> einstein's theory of special relativity. only i made it better. >> you can see that he's actually had a brain. you believe that? >> what happened? >> he quit to be a bouncer. [ laughs ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: dolph lundgren. "the expendables 2" opens in theaters on friday. stick around, grimes performs next, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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we need to look for a new van. yeah. i just don't know where to start. glad you found us. start by test-driving nearly every make and model, all in one place. carmax. start here.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our next guest is making her american tv debut with us tonight to perform the song "genesis" from her acclaimed album "visions." please welcome grimes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ my heart will never feel will never see will never know ♪
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♪ oh, heart and then it falls and then i fall and then i know ♪ ♪ my heart will never feel will never see will never know ♪ ♪ oh, heart and then it falls and then i fall and then i know ♪ ♪ my heart will never feel will never see will never know ♪ ♪ oh, heart and then it falls and then i fall and then i know ♪ ♪ my heart will never feel will never see will never know ♪ ♪ oh, heart and then it falls and then i fall and then i know ♪ ♪ my ♪ ♪
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♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different i am the one who falls ♪ ♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different i am the one who falls ♪ ♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different i am the one who falls ♪ ♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different ♪ ♪ my heart will never feel will never see will never know ♪ ♪ oh, heart and then it falls and then i fall
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and then i know ♪ ♪ my heart will never feel will never see will never know ♪ ♪ oh, heart and then it falls and then i fall and then i know ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different i am the one who falls ♪ ♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different i am the one who falls ♪ ♪ holding on i am a vagabond it's always different

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