...just wash your unit with carbolic soap, and take a good long pee. That'll take care of the nasties. Better than seeing that crabby judgemental doctor. Arsenicals didn't work that good anyway - quite toxic. Not sure penicillin was available quite yet.

Tony's wife didn't seem too upset with Tony even though he dirtied her up and killed her baby.

What? No shots of the guy's hooter? So how am I supposed to know what it looks like? (the syph sore, I mean)

Remember, pick-ups and prostitutes can NOT be cured! BUT.. somehow YOU can be! (?!) Understand that WE are MEN, we are not the hazard, we are the victims! It's those evil "pick-ups" and prostitutes that are solely to blame, yes-sireee Bob. And what about Tony? Syphilis has effected his brain, see him wipe the same thing off his store window two different times. He had gotten absent minded! Don't kid yourself, you can't a take a chance, that finishes you. You must now leave home, quit school, and move to a place where nobody knows who you are! There is, however, one escape available from these little corkscrew commandos. It's Paxton's Panacea! Yes folks, in 9 short days you will be FREE, guaranteed. On the 9th day, all your pains will have vanished, and ALL your troubles will be OVER! Yes, ALL your troubles, every single one! That will be $15 please, in ADVANCE!

Like Walt DisneyÂs mentruation film, I never knew something like this existed, but here it is! A syphilis warning film made by the Academy of Motion Arts and Sciences! As we begin, we see a highly stereotyped Italian character named, of course, Tony, waiting for his baby to arrive. When the doctor comes out with the bad news, the baby was killed because it had syphilis! Tony drops his accordian! (GREAT sound). After this, Tony and his wife follow the doctorÂs advice and get cured for this. From there, the doctor meets up with the clinical doctor treating Tony and his wife, and they have sort of a mini-tour of many patient cases. The best one involves the old man getting lotion cures from a doctor that donÂt work.. what does he do? Oh I wonÂt spoil that, but it comes as a surprise and I was laughing loudly at this.

This 40s anti-syphilis film features several case studies of various people visiting a public health clinic to be tested for syphilis. The first case, featuring an outrageously-stereotyped Italian immigrant couple whose baby is born dead because of the disease, is fairly maudlin. Other than that, the film is surprisingly straightforward and unsensationalistic in its message. ItÃÂs an interesting example of how the subject was dealt with back in the 40s, though it does contain way too many close-ups of blood being drawn for my comfort level.
Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

All the elements of a classic. I liked the initial misdirection: first weÃÂÃÂre introduced to a sufferer who is an ethnic type, reinforcing the comforting belief then that syph is only a disease of the lower orders. Then, surprise: a clean-cut college boy is also a victim! Very effective. Just to round out the group, in between these two we meet a sturdy workingman (played, as so often, by Ward Bond) who was afflicted after he picked up a floozy ÃÂÃÂat a dance hall.ÃÂÃÂ That is only one of the dangerous places; we get to watch those student-athletes entering an honest-to-God cathouse. You donÃÂÃÂt see much of that any more. And of course in every picture like this, there is a look at the spirochetes through the microscope. If you want to scare the audience, you have to show them the little wigglers.

I am surprised, however, given the amount of secrecy and shame that was supposed to attend this affliction, that nobody in the film is allowed to show any embarrassment about it. The first sight we have of the treatment facility shows the words ÃÂÃÂVENEREAL DISEASE CLINICÃÂÃÂ painted in huge letters on the wall. So much for being discreet. And when the doc is treating Ward the Workingman, there is no modesty afforded the poor guy: not only is another doctor invited in (not to assist, but as a casual kibitzer), the treating physician also minces no words in asking his attractive nurse to please come in and bring a kit to test this bastard.

You have to appreciate the visual aid that the doc has hanging on his wall, too. An unlikely chart with little human outlines that is supposed to show how the contagion spreads. IÃÂÃÂm half surprised the little figures on it were not rendered in flagrante delicto. Equally memorable is the scene of the poor devil who visits a quack doctor, obviously in the end stages of the disease, locomotor ataxia and all. HeÃÂÃÂs seeking what today we might refer to as ÃÂÃÂalternative medicineÃÂÃÂ because, unlike the other syphilitics, apparently he does not want to community to find out what heÃÂÃÂs got. ThereÃÂÃÂs only one remedy for this guy, and he takes it. Too bad: he never got to see the impact he made on the impressionable. I know that I for one will certainly avoid catching syphilis now that I have seen this film.