Hi there. (Sips coffee) Hi. (Sip) Hi. Hi it's March seventeenth, two thousand and six, I haven't smoked in three days, and nothing feels good.
In CNN's top stories, "Jessica Simpson loves Bush, not fund-raisers".
I wonder what that's about.
Jessica backed out of a Republican fund-raiser where she would have had the opportunity to meet Bush. Tom Reynolds, a New York Republican, summed it up precisely, when he said (chuckles) "She's a celebrity that was going to come, now she's a celebrity that is not." Jessica's appearance at a Republican fund-raiser would've been a political doomsday device against the Democratic party, so I'm glad that she showed a sense of responsibility. (Sip)
One second of silence: Michael Jackson's Neverland is officially... closed. (beat) OK!
Also on CNN, two days after the beginning of Operation Swarmer, the largest offensive since Shock 'n' Awe, this headline: "Three years later: insecurity, instability, and hope in Iraq" and under the picture the caption reads: "Despite the threat of attacks, Iraqis still shop at open air markets such as this one in Baghdad".
Amazing. There's still hope if you can buy fruit. (Sip)
Earlier this week, federal judge James Ware asked Google to turn over a list of search words, uh that people like you or I type into Google, to the Justice Department which is building an anti-pornography case right now. Words like (beep)ck, (beep)t, (beep)sy, (beep)ts, (beep)head. Personally I think it's kinda nice that someone cares about my personal information. (Sip) I forgot buttlicker.
Yesterday Bill Gates made fun of Negroponte's "one laptop per child" program which seeks to outfit kids in the developing world with one hundred dollar laptops, saying quote "If you are going to have people share the computer, get a broadband connection and have somebody there who can support the user. Geez, get a decent computer where you can actually read the text and you're not sitting there cranking the thing while you're trying to type." Poor people, (chuckles) eight? (Shakes head) Gates made the statement right after he showed off a new ultra mobile computer which cost between six hundred and a thousand dollars, which is another option.
And that's everything that happened in the world today.